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🐷 Ethan Oliver Ralph / TheRalphRetort / Rad Roberts / Jcaesar187 / Rage Pig / "Killstream" / "Tequila Sunrise" - 5'1'' fat alcoholic, owner of a gunt, convicted felon and revenge pornographer, property of the ugly failed tranny pornstar Lucas Roberts. Has quadruple titties.
I just can't imagine the Retort making it through the election unaborted. Even if Ethan manages to keep his composure (unlikely, especially with his repeated statements that he'll be drinking throughout the stream), a Democratic victory in either the Presidency or Congress will cause infinite fedposting in his chat that will end up getting him deplatformed anyway; his new chat rules are evidence that Dlive is already sick of that sort of thing even without a massive flashpoint.
I do hope he somehow manages to limp along to Tampa and then does IRL, since it will be a disaster, but I'm not sure what form that would even take at that point.
you know actually to atone for pushing people to shit on ralph only to abandon them to utter boredom and to keep the thread from dying between the two events and afterwards if he somehow doesnt fucking die outright ill post a balding update or a face update on ethan if he wears a hat. we can laugh at his daily fattening, eye narrowing, and greying/balding, im tired of playing ralphs game of pretending his views and income matter as bragging rights im just going to keep posting the ugly truth that stares back at ethan through the mirror daily, he cant bot health and he cant launder fat out of his grape shaped head.
Funny part is Ralph doesn't even use the account.
One of the last times he showed his screen he had kiwi farms on one tab.
I wonder if the discord drama followed him to telegram? Or if just moved wherever else he takes calls..
I'm done after the election stream. I can't take this shit. I was doing it out of boredom and fun, but the show is so fucking awful now it's taking the fun out of it and put me right back to being bored.
I will hold out until the election stream, and MAYBE the next day depending on how the big stream goes. After that, I'm done.
He'll probably put footage of it on his patreon after extreme editing. I can't fathom him being stupid enough to let more IRL footage get out without him thoroughly scrubbing it.
He'll probably put footage of it on his patreon after extreme editing. I can't fathom him being stupid enough to let more IRL footage get out without him thoroughly scrubbing it.
honestly i think we should go full Nixon tapes on Ralph. a silent streamsnipe with an account name he won't be able to trace. and its only once someone spills the beans on a massive fuck up do we go back and check, . that will lower the chance of Ralph being able to talk about being victorious and like we've been saying, with no enemy to hype up he can't get the lemons from his simps. honestly i bet Nick at the very least will be able to keep them all from having another pillstream on camera anyways. the second someone does something to Ralph that causes the whole thing to collapse, Nick will have made sure the cameras got shut off way sooner. Just like with CRP, we could have seen Ethan arrested way back then, but the adults in the room kept us from getting a truely great end to the IBS saga. As for the election, it will be another dud. it took until 4AM before Trump lied and said hilary conceded. With how many states are going to be counting mail ins, we won't get a result until thursday at the latest
Joseph didn't strike me as a snake oil salesman, just a superstitious African dude. Honestly, he wasn't that bad of a guest. I found him & Heshy, the Orthodox Jew running for city council, to be rather charming & entertaining in their own right. See, Ralph? These were good guests! Weird, but not preachy like David Weiss or any of the other wackjobs that can't stop reeeeeeing about juice.
...but who cares what a lesbian on Kiwi Farms thinks. (I'm not exactly Ralph's core audience, to be fair.)
Though speaking of Ralph's core audience, he had under 600 live viewers on DLive alone per @Sam Losco . So maybe people checked out when they saw a black man? Or maybe they split when Ralph broke everything? (I find this theory unlikely; Ralph breaks something every night.) Though chat was the liveliest I'd seen it get in a hot minute.
I'm fucking telling you, November 3rd. I will die on this hill.
Who here is possessed by evil sex spirits?
Killstream Reeeeeecap 10/27/20 – Congratulations, Ralph, now stop beating your meat
I was gonna play a spoopy game to keep me awake but I can’t listen to the voice acting & Ralph at the same time. STRESS-SIGH
It hasn’t even started & I'm already reaching for Excedrin. It's gonna be a night, Kiwi Krew. Expect lots of smug over the…Ralphababy…
Everytime he says “Ralphababy" my brain parses it as “Ralphaburger.” Will Ralph eat his unborn child like an alcoholic Saturn? I almost want to make a Goya reimagining. Almost.
Anyway, how are you guys? Weather can’t decide if it wants to be hot or cold, so I feel like I'm coming down with something as a result. Nothing too bad, just general malaise a nice cup of tea should fix. I've noticed I've been grinding my teeth a lot lately, though. Gotta stick it out for just another week. Just one more week & my suffering is over. I hope.
BoJack intro coming in hot at 9:53 PM, along with Ralph yelling “LET’S FUCKING GOOOOO" hard enough to fuck with his audio levels, so it sounds like he’s screaming into a tin can on a string in hopes whoever’s holding the other can can hear him
Do Zoomers even know about that two-cans-on-a-string thing? Though I think I used to use styrofoam/plastic cups. I must be getting old.
[reflecting on my life through the guitar intro]
Ladies & gentlemen hello & welcome to the Killme I am your host BOLDYSPICY the owner & editor of yet another tension headache-turning-migraine
Shoutout to Jen/LoveIsAFourLetterWord with the Ninjaghini; she & Ralph were discussing Buffy
We have a guest, Joseph Oka…chu…something
Anyway, buy Ralph’s hats, they come in red & black
Here is a pitchurr of the sonogram
Ah, Joseph is African. A Nigerian Trump fan. I think he is also an actor? Trump is making Africa Great Again.
Audio is fucky
Joseph lives in California, sensed demons around Obama, & has been chosen by God to support Trump
We watch a video in which Joseph tells us that God has told him to tell us to stop masturbating.
I'll give Ralph this, his last two guests have been very, uh, diverse
“Masturbation is sexual intercourse between you & an evil spirit.” This is a direct quote.
Chat is losing their minds
Was Obama born in Kenya? Joseph is unsure, but the whole thing was fishy.
Warski is now an Anti-Coomer.
Someone in chat says when you take pills, you are possessed by an evil pill spirit. Watch out, Ralph.
When women jill off, an evil male spirit enters your soul & prevents you from getting married. I'M SORRY FOR BEING AN AYYLAWG RALPH IT WAS AN EVIL SPIRIT INSIDE ME
I'm gonna go pick up women in the bar: “hey baby, wanna have a threesome? You, me, & the evil spirit inside me"
Everyone seems to be having fun. That’s nice.
Joseph once jacked off in a church bathroom. Uhhhh.
Joseph used to have sleep paralysis when he was jerkin' the gherkin. Evil spirits.
Oh boy, gonna have callers
Tell us about AIDS, magic Nigerian man. “It’s very popular”
You can cure AIDS & Ebola by eating various roots & herbs
Magic Johnson is still alive because he has money. Joseph posits he probably flies to Africa to get herbs
Killstream audience keeps asking the Nigerian man about Ugandan shit, they're not interchangeable you fucking brainlets
Ralph broke the Callbot. I can hear the callers on stream, Gator can hear them through Hangouts. Bibble is now here. Ralph can’t hear anyone.
Ralph what the fuck did you do? He still can’t hear Bibble or Gator. His wireless headset probably died.
If it’s a wireless/Bluetooth headset, it probably just ran out of battery.
Whoa Kemosabe
[dead air intensifies]
Gator cuts back in briefly & I distinctly hear “—sabe.”
[please stand by]
My sister has a Bluetooth headset, you gotta charge it, nigga
Masturbation is detrimental to your health because of the evil spirits
“BUTTERS GODDAMMIT"
“Southern Dingo's Religious Guide you’re on the Killstream.” Dago is bathing his kid right now. Please don’t call the guest a “nigger" in front of the kid, I beg you
SouthernDago is being very terse. Dago you are so fucking transparent, Joseph isn’t going to fuck your wife through the Callbot or something
Masturbation is more detrimental to Africa than AIDS
I can hear Dingo give a distressed sigh. Get over yourself you inbred hick wop
Masturbation is more detrimental to America than racism
“You have an ally in me,” says Dago. He is scandalized that Weinstein jacked off into a plant?
Oh dear God Joseph is going on about adrenocrome
Adrenocrome can turn demons & animals human
If Dago owned a slave & choked the chicken in front of him, would he be Massah-bating? Shut up, Dago.
“What do you think about gay?” –Ethan Ralph
Being a gay & masturbating are not the same thing, but chronic masturbation leads to gay. Uh.
I too like to see black women with big backside, I'd argue that THAT made me a gay
It’s ok2b gay, but no one likes you, especially in Africa
I'd rather talk to Joseph than Dingo, Joseph at least is a nice guy
I think I hear rain in the background somewhere. Is it coming from Ralph or Warski?
No Nut November on the Killstream
Oh, I think it’s raining in Warski’s neck of the woods
Warski tries to argue that semen is a man’s life force. Gator sez chronic masturbation can lower testosterone levels.
The earlier tech problems seem to have defanged Ralph. He sounds much less energetic, depressed even. I actually feel kinda bad. It’s okay, buddy.
The Killstream always has tech problems, I'm not sure why this one took the oxygen out of his tank.
Warski, Gator, & Joseph discuss the finer points of cooming
“Is Wank-kanda the mortal enemy of Wakanda, & can the Black Panther defeat their king White Tiger?” Behold, the only funny thing Southern Dingo has ever said.
Butters you’re on the Killstream, be extremely autistic
Joseph says, “let me tell you something scientific" & then goes on a tangent about diseased aliens
Butters tries to school me on homosexuality, thank you Butters
Orgasms ARE good for prostate health, yes.
“Injaculation.” The Tantric Indian thing where you ejaculate in the bladder? So you can stay erect longer? Yeah, I've heard of that. Sounds like a great way to give yourself a bladder infection.
Joseph, what do you say when people say you’re crazy? That the greatest offering to Satan is to cum on the ground. Like Onan?
Joseph was in like 200 African films or something, which is why he wants to raise awareness about masturbation
Stop using idioms, English is probably Joseph’s fifth language
Ralph describes the little fetus kicking its feet & doing its thing, & he could see its little heartbeat. Awwwww. My heart.
Congratulations, Ralph.
Costumes on the 30th. Fuck me, that’s a Friday. I wanna take Friday off.
Gator did a shitty Solid Snake/Otakon impression on Warski’s show last night.
Stop ruining MGS for me with shitty impressions gentlemen pls thx
PantsuParty has an OnlyFans, but only for reviewing hentai
Riotwatch Philadephia
NOT THE FOOT LOCKER
“Where’s Ocelot Revolver when you need him" –Ralph
Warski had a debilitating stutter & no friends growing up because everyone thought he was a retard. Therefore he suffered more than black people.
Prince Harry talks about how Megan taught him about racism by spending a week in her shoes. Is she trooning him out
Warski bitching about black people o'clock, thank you for the insightful social commentary
LET’S WATCH TUCKER CARLSON CLIPS YAAAAAY
Donate to Killstream dot live slash entropy slash whatever
“Who's Rob Walker?” Nostalgia Critic's brother? IS HUNTER BIDEN IN CAHOOTS WITH CHANNEL AWESOME
I've been following the Hunter Biden shit & I still have no idea what the fuck is going on, nor do I understand what is going on with this Tucker interview
It IS amazing how bad the Biden family is fucking up compared to the Clintons’ & Trump's shady dealings
Nov. 3rd guest roster: a lot
Shoutout Chillstream Uncut alloneword, shoutout podcast gang gang
Shoutout to the graphics guy. I gotta up my design game.
We haven’t finished Tucker yet? Fuck me.
Rudy, Barr, Bannon, etc. need to shit or get off the pot, for real
Alex Jones/Joe Rogan clips
Pause so Warski can shill his shit, now more Alex
Gator’s not dead, he was sweeping up
Someone in chat offers Ralph a cool $1k to get Zidan on the 3rd. Ralph tried. Gator sez Zidan has his own “election party" he’s going to. Didn’t someone say Rackets was trying to recruit him for his stream?
Bye Gator, goodnight
[Peaceful Sunset outro]
[Step by Step outro]
I've perked up after a few cups of tea, which might be why I'm being extra-nice to Ralph today. No word on the sex spirits, though.
ETA:
Not that I'm aware of in the States.
I hadn't thought of that. It would explain a lot. Granted, Faith is dumb enough to believe more fights = a stronger relationship, but keep in mind that she's also a spoiled brat & kind of a psychobitch. BPD (what I suspect is her core issue) is no fucking joke, & she's also a moody teenage girl on top of that. But now on top of that, her brain is marinating in pregnancy hormones. The girl is a ticking chemical timebomb.
For all the men ITT, chemical fluctuations that occur with menses fuck normal women up. If you've got a couple screws loose, it can trigger psychotic episodes. Pregnancy is that on crack. Ralph is fucked.
I've seen it a lot in other Amerifats. Usually a potential indicator of diabetes. Could also be a lipoma, a benign fatty tumor, but I think it's the former.
He'll probably put footage of it on his patreon after extreme editing. I can't fathom him being stupid enough to let more IRL footage get out without him thoroughly scrubbing it.
I guess Ralph has hit matt jarbo level in terms of lolcowdom, he will have his little audience but his donations is thin, he's probably going to have to find a job to support his Abomination and child bride but we know Ralph is a cops episode waiting to happen.
lolo i just realized that the joke about his shit shirt having more fonts than buyers might actually be true since its confirmed he sold less than 10 of them, also its amazing he's reduced to comparing his income with that of a lolcow forum that is run pretty much just to keep itself going. youre comparing your income trying your damndest to fuck over and use and leach off of your fans and friends with no regard for them, their income, or their safety or any sort of morality to someone willingly refusing or ruining monetary opportunities with a fanbase far less open to many avenues of monetization and you still see less than 1/100th of the shirts he can.
ffs ive sold more shirts than ralph with street side bootlegs, with pewds knock off shirts ive sold more eceleb merch than ethan ralph
The one picture of Ralph from the back, sitting at the bar illustrates this best. This is the result of having a very high amount of fat and almost no muscle development. Most fat people dont look like this because usually even fat people have at least some amount of muscle definition as a result of carrying around so much weight. It would be interesting to see what Ralph's body fat percentage is
I'm not sure if this has been mentioned before, but just look how much better Andy Warski is doing compared to Ralph, he rarely dips below 15k lemons in his full shows getting often 20k+ lemons. And remember, Andy keeps donating to the Killstream boosting his numbers (6k lemons this month).
I'd argue SubCultured is now a bigger dlive channel than the Killstream
I'm not sure if this has been mentioned before, but just look how much better Andy Warski is doing compared to Ralph, he rarely dips below 15k lemons in his full shows getting often 20k+ lemons. And remember, Andy keeps donating to the Killstream boosting his numbers (6k lemons this month).
Andy basically begs his audience to donate to him. Makes promises that he will do X if you donate and get to a certain level. His big one is that he lies to his audience that he will start getting more racial with the commentary at 10K... Then never does (because he cucks to Dlive moderators). He also promises to do handstands and burn his nipple hair/pubic hair for additional donations. They aren't donating because he has interesting content or really like what he says. They (the audience) pay him to be a fucking retard. The moment he tries to not look like the retard he is. They will stop donating.
Andy is basically the homeless man in the subway with whatever random talent that annoys you while you wait to go to work while begging you for tips. You give him money because you hope he moves away because you are tired of the smell of stale Steel Reserve on his breath and drying of urine stained pants being next to you.
Ralph failing to do Solid Snakes voice tells me his balls never dropped.
Ralph saying Ocelot Revolver tells me he's never played a single game.
Also Ralph lamenting how he didnt pre order a PS5, Im sure he cant even afford it on his lemon minimum wage income. Plus with more expensive games he wont be able to afford more then one.
That's another way that ralph is disingenuous to his audience, much like how he pretends to be right wing, or alt right, or whatever you want to call it. Because ralph was born from gamergate he has had to pretend that he is a gamer, when in reality he doesn't play, follow, or care about video games at all, but is stuck playing pretend to pander to his audience.
That's another way that ralph is disingenuous to his audience, much like how he pretends to be right wing, or alt right, or whatever you want to call it. Because ralph was born from gamergate he has had to pretend that he is a gamer, when in reality he doesn't play, follow, or care about video games at all, but is stuck playing pretend to pander to his audience.
I almost wonder if that's part of why Gaytor is there. He seems to keep up with that kind of stuff and can talk the gamer, Zoe Quinn stuff. That's what's always been so funny about the Mark Collett appearances. Mark spends about half the time talking games, and Ralph and Andy seem to not know a lot about it. Maybe it's because Ralph was a thing in Gamergate so people assume he must be a huge Gamer, when he probably was more in it for the gossip.
