Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

mothman96 said:
It is not unknown to have people his age attending college. His hobo look might be what raises eyebrows. As to how he comes off on campus-- I think he's on his "best" behavior, not wanting to draw attention that he's psycho predator and scare a potential Gen Z breeder away.

ETA:
What will be giving off the creeper vibe is when he is caught eye raping a girl/group of girls. The girl looks up and/or turns in his direction and there he is hungrily staring like the Predator that he is. The Freak calls catching a girls eye as getting a "love buzz".

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I feel like he's going to creep someone out enough to complain about him if he gets a "love buzz" just from making eye contact. Just imagine being in college and going to your next class and looking at the hobo in the halls and having them stare into your soul with a look on their face like my avatar, the stuff of nightmares.

By this point i think hes infamous enough locally any girl he approaches already knows to take the SCP-096 approach of dealing with him and just avoid eye contact at all costs and get as far away from him as possible
 
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Dumpsterfire Enthusiast said:
I feel like he's going to creep someone out enough to complain about him if he gets a "love buzz" just from making eye contact. Just imagine being in college and going to your next class and looking at the hobo in the halls and having them stare into your soul with a look on their face like my avatar, the stuff of nightmares.

By this point i think hes infamous enough locally any girl he approaches already knows to take the SCP-096 approach of dealing with him and just avoid eye contact at all costs and get as far away from him as possible
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Does 'love buzz' mean the same thing as 'gender euphoria'?

(:_(
 
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Dumpsterfire Enthusiast said:
I feel like he's going to creep someone out enough to complain about him if he gets a "love buzz" just from making eye contact. Just imagine being in college and going to your next class and looking at the hobo in the halls and having them stare into your soul with a look on their face like my avatar, the stuff of nightmares.

By this point i think hes infamous enough locally any girl he approaches already knows to take the SCP-096 approach of dealing with him and just avoid eye contact at all costs and get as far away from him as possible
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Speaking of SCP, how long do you think it will be before lucas inspires his own SCP monster? Perhaps lucas isn't what he appears to be - the wern is actually a black oil like sentient and malicious puddle of telomerase inhabiting the body of a dead and rotting hobo it came across one freezing night under a bridge on the streets of olympia. It would explain alot about how he smells and looks. Not to mention how he interacts with people. Once the werns host body rots from the inside out to the point its unusable, the wern pours itself out of the nose, ears and ass and moves around the dark alleys of washington state cities searching for another hobo to be its host. All with the goal of finding a young, fecund zoomer bae capable of having her eggs drenched in the werns sentient telomerase to prepare them for reproducing and unleashing many more wernlings, who all in turn need their own hobo hosts, in a plan to take over the world

Almost like a more horrifying combination of invasion of the body snatchers meets the x files
 
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Gaear Grimsrud said:
Lucas is completely blind to himself.

He actually thought this pic of his fat, flabby, bloated fucking ass could entice anybody.

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Man, I really miss the Cute Older Daddy era. It was like watching a really graphic, visceral horror movie that never ends. Bring back Cute Older Daddy Dot Weebly Dot Com.
 
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WonderWino said:
Speaking of SCP, how long do you think it will be before lucas inspires his own SCP monster? Perhaps lucas isn't what he appears to be - the wern is actually a black oil like sentient and malicious puddle of telomerase inhabiting the body of a dead and rotting hobo it came across one freezing night under a bridge on the streets of olympia. It would explain alot about how he smells and looks. Not to mention how he interacts with people. Once the werns host body rots from the inside out to the point its unusable, the wern pours itself out of the nose, ears and ass and moves around the dark alleys of washington state cities searching for another hobo to be its host. All with the goal of finding a young, fecund zoomer bae capable of having her eggs drenched in the werns sentient telomerase to prepare them for reproducing and unleashing many more wernlings, who all in turn need their own hobo hosts, in a plan to take over the world

Almost like a more horrifying combination of invasion of the body snatchers meets the x files
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SCP-069-The Wern Classification: Euclid

Description - The Wern is a humanoid SCP resembling a homeless man. if left completely alone it just seems like a normal hobo but eye contact triggers one of its anomalous effects depending on the age and gender of the person looking at it with the effects being more intense the younger they are. Male D class it attempts to make it into its host, it has a very low success rate but when successful the test subject becomes an instance of SCP-069-2 and will enter a trance like state and do whatever the Wern asks. Female D class cause it to freeze and be unable to say anything but its name unless an instance of SCP-069-2 is present, in which case SCP-069-2 will be able to infect her. Once the Wern has 2 hosts he becomes far more powerful resulting in it being reclassified from Safe to Euclid and D-class experiments being banned after it caused a containment breach by swooping 10 security guards at a time and rampaging through site 13 searching for a "bae" until MTF card readers was able to recontain.

Standard containment procedures - The Wern is to be held in a reinforced anti bacteial containment chamber known colloquially as the fart box. The Wern is only to leave its containment cell for interviews with site researchers in exchange for KFC and vague hints of eventual poonaner. Site researchers are not to actually give it any poonaner though since after the last D-class experiments the ethics comittee deicded it just isnt in the cards
 
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Dumpsterfire Enthusiast said:
SCP-069-The Wern Classification: Euclid

Description - The Wern is a humanoid SCP resembling a homeless man. if left completely alone it just seems like a normal hobo but eye contact triggers one of its anomalous effects depending on the age and gender of the person looking at it. Male D class it attempts to make it into its host, it has a very low success rate but when successful the test subject becomes an instance of SCP-069-2. Female D class cause it to freeze and be unable to say anything but its name unless an instance of SCP-069-2 is present, in which case SCP-069-2 will pick up the female and throw her to The Wern. We dont know what happens after that since Dr Bill Flatt banned all D-class experiments on the spot, just wasnt in the cards he said

Standard containment procedures - The Wern is to be held in a standard humanoid cell.and given a bucket of KFC per interview with foundation researchers. Interviews so far have been unproductive. usually resulting in SCP-069 demanding "the hook up" foundation researchers only get called bigots when they attempt to explain that "the hook up" just isnt in the cards
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'May only be slain with the ancient and mythical clinkerdagger'

'Much like a vampire, must be invited in by the homeowner and is then very difficult to remove, as christian symbols and rites appear to have little effect beyond making it enraged'

'When unable to latch on to an unsuspecting homeowner, makes its nest beneath old bridges, preferably close to college campuses and bus stations'

'Known to lure its victims with strategically placed candy and pep sticks

'Victims may be able to distract the wern by throwing a handful of meeples on the ground nearby. Like a vampire, it will be compelled to count them and add them to its collection of board games. Thus enabling the victim to escape by calling an uber'

'Becomes enraged at the sight of frozen catfish and packs of cards. Particularly if said cards are from presidential gift packs given to passengers on air force one during president trumps time in office'
 
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boner_alert said:
As sincerely stupid and rudimentary as his tard brain is, he's a natural born predator. His predator tard brain is adept at looking for and zeroing in on social contracts that he can use to manipulate what he wants from people. Unfortunately for him, his tard brain limits him from the subtlety and cleverness this requires and he ends up doing stupid shit like attempt to illegally blackmail his neighbors for a girl to assault, or constantly scream about Christians not doing everything he wants, based on his tard interpretation of what it means to be 'Christian-like'

His mom being involved with this whole complex with religion makes sense. I could see his mom attempting to wrangle his tard behavior with the fear of God/hell or instill rules of 'Christian' behavior, which I imagine was mostly about leaving people alone and the concept of sharing and waiting for your turn. Which to a special tardflake like Lucas, these very basic social rules must have felt exactly like enslavement to others.. and in his tard brain he formulated that Christians have committed to a life of doing 'good,' as in doing anything and everything for others. Of course this gets further cemented in his tard brain as churches have an open door policy and religious groups tend to focus on homelessness as a public service and he's spent the last decade+ stomping into churches, shelters, and soup kitchens with expectations of food and shelter for doing absolutely nothing, just on the merit of his putrid, piss soaked existence

In this vein of Lucas the predator, I could see both theories about his memory being true - that it's shitty and he genuinely doesn't remember his worst behaviors, and that he selectively and strategically doesn't remember his worst behaviors. Training your brain to ignore/not remember something and going through the motions on autopilot is a common phenomenon. I could see him choosing to forget or lying to himself enough to genuinely forget the truth for some things, and him doing his characteristic predator shit and feigning ignorance on other things, especially if its age of consent legal shit. Because if there's one thing a predator is going to be meticulous about, its going to be age of consent laws and the predator in Lucas overrides his defunct tard brain and I believe in this area, he's as lucid as can be, and that's why I think he's so dangerous and it's a matter of when...

EDIT:
holy shit this is the pic I was talking about!
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Interesting post. I sometimes wonder if his Christian upbringing, having some moral code instilled into him at a young age, is the one thing that has kept him from doing something horrible to some young girl. That just when the urge to do something he knows is immoral or criminal hits him that mechanism from his youth kicks in telling him that “No. This is bad Lucas. This is a sin.” and maybe this is where his initial resentment of Christians comes from? Because his whole atheist schtick is razor thin and I don’t think he actually believes it. Everything he states about his atheism is in direct opposition to his Christian beliefs. Like “prove x to me or there is no God” but God is still at the center of it. Anyway, if this idea that his Christian upbringing is the reason he has yet to go rapey on someone I say score one for Christianity.

It’s an interesting angle to contemplate.
 
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Dumpsterfire Enthusiast said:
I love how its strategically spread out so the 50s are all fanned right out and the 10s and 20s are all lumped together. Especially with the caption its just comedy gold that he thinks that some girl is gonna see this and want to approach him after thinking he's a real winner


Reminds me of that guy Fantastic in fallout new vegas who got hired with a theoretical degree in physics to run a power station and goes around sticking forks in power sockets because he is scientistic. Also some of his quotes really sum up Lucas like "I know exactly what im doing, just not what the result will be" or "Apparently 1% efficiency just isn't good enough for some assholes"
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what do you know about theoretical physics?
as much as anyone id ever met
lol that was the best dialogue ive seen in a game for a long time
but mr.fantastic had a job at least
 
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denysdemontfort said:
Nothing on the Spokane inmate roster/recent bookings, but I would imagine it'd be like the last several times where he would end up at the mental hospital rather than the county jail. If we don't hear from him today I'd guess that or something else medical. Otherwise he'd have in-person class today, right? Tues/Thurs?
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If that does turn out to be the case it would mean he couldn't even get through two days of classes without going off like a nut at some student. Even for lucas thats concerningly fast. Though I wouldn't call it surprising considering his recent behavior

I suspect thats probably what happened. I don't see what else would make him go radio silent all of a sudden like this. Even if something happened to the phone he would still have access to school computers and would be posting stuff by now. Like you said if we don't hear something by the end of the day clearly something must have happened
 
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denysdemontfort said:
Nothing on the Spokane inmate roster/recent bookings, but I would imagine it'd be like the last several times where he would end up at the mental hospital rather than the county jail. If we don't hear from him today I'd guess that or something else medical. Otherwise he'd have in-person class today, right? Tues/Thurs?
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His in-person HED class is Tuesdays and Wednesdays. That's why I was expecting for him to post something about his time on campus on Wed.
 
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WonderWino said:
If that does turn out to be the case it would mean he couldn't even get through two days of classes without going off like a nut at some student. Even for lucas thats concerningly fast. Though I wouldn't call it surprising considering his recent behavior

I suspect thats probably what happened. I don't see what else would make him go radio silent all of a sudden like this. Even if something happened to the phone he would still have access to school computers and would be posting stuff by now. Like you said if we don't hear something by the end of the day clearly something must have happened
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Yea, I'm still reading the past posts and haven't gotten to the first school experience just yet so I'm not sure what his mental state was going into it, but it seems like it's coming at a time when he was more stable and possibly still medicated. That being said, I'm leaning toward something medical maybe. Dude has unchecked diabetes and eats nothing but carbs, fat, and sugar. I wouldn't be surprised if that has finally come for him.
 
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So I did some googling to see if anything popped up about any SCC incidents involving him in the last day or two. Didn't find anything like that, but I did come across this:

dragonkeeper19600.tumblr.com

MST: Conversation Our Age by Lucas Werner

It’s been a while since I’ve done an MST. Whenever I do an MST these days, I end up saying that, but tonight is a special occasion because as long as its been since I sat down with some fan fic...
dragonkeeper19600.tumblr.com dragonkeeper19600.tumblr.com

My favorite part being 'Evidence or fucketh off. The Atheist Code. For so it is mote! On to the realeth shit'

and this

www.change.org

Lucas: I am the real Lucas Werner, your telomeres god. You are too young to be interested in women, you bigot! You will give them anger, depression and cancer. It is also incest. Back off of my millennial women, I am a real man and unlike you I am

Stephen Rye: Press Criminal Charges Against Brothel Owner Dennis Hof
www.change.org www.change.org

Though that sounds like it is likely some kind of parody
 
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With Lucas's dumbass flashing money around like a wannabee rapper or dare I say wigger. This very well could have led to some other vagrants jumping the low status male and stealing his belongings, including that stack of money that he was planning on using for expensive steak dinners as well as for impressing the baby zooms.

If you're gonna be a hobo who gets a cash payment, you need to keep that yourself. Hobos are desperate and would not hesitate to steal from their fellow ragmen. And since he is too dumb and incompetent to have a debit card or a secure way to keep unused funds he carries all his assets around in liquid cash. This is a terrible idea, really for anyone to do that. If you lose cash, it is gone. If you have money on a Visa or MasterCard debit card, you may be able to get it back if it is lost or stolen. But Lucas, while sooo ready to be a dad, cannot handle such a device.

So, we will see. It would be terrific if he had a chimpout at the college and was mooing and reeeing and he was taken into custody by campus security and then left campus in handcuffs. But we are not probably that lucky yet.
 
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