DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[gobsmackedmortician]

Phil could have been smarter early on he could of streamed WWE champions granted he would have lost some viewers but bought in whales from that ''game''
he could have used his tips openly to rank up his account, clawed money back on his taxes and played /fed his addiction all day long as much as he like.
maybe that makes to much sense
maybe the dirty secret of spending retards money to flex on other retards is the real high or he is a true gambler and is addicted to losing

Problem Gamblers are Addicted to Losing | WhyWeSuffer.com

whywesuffer.com

 

[TheGoutburglar]

Two problems:

1) Playing gacha is where Phil goes in order to feel cool, because he doesn't get that anywhere else because of being an asshole.
2) It was only a matter of time before the cost became obvious, and the question of where the begged for money was going got answered.

The second one is the most important because without that, Phil can just ditch an account or even whole game and hide somewhere else. But after so much money spent, he can't just pack his bags. And even though he may not lose any fans over exposing where his money goes, he still fears the possibility, it still remains a coin he doesn't want to toss. Speaks volumes about how unkillable he really feels that he is.

 

[TheGreatWhiteNorth]

As nauseating as that trait of his is, it's better than him figuring out how to embrace being a muppet because then he would be raking it in and Phil with more money is not a good thing.

We all know that Phil thinks this is beneath him (even though he’s demonstrated multiple times that he’s more than willing to engage Clown Mode for money). He wouldn’t do it purposefully out of the simple fact that he’d never hear the end of it after trying so hard to present himself as “not a children’s entertainer”.

 

[TheGoutburglar]

We all know that Phil thinks this is beneath him (even though he’s demonstrated multiple times that he’s more than willing to engage Clown Mode for money). He wouldn’t do it purposefully out of the simple fact that he’d never hear the end of it after trying so hard to present himself as “not a children’s entertainer”.

I don't think he cares about that because any time somebody bursts his bubble (which is quite often) he just LIMBs them and moves on as if that didn't happen. Phil has no objection to living in a false reality where nothing in the past counts unless he needs it to.

No, as he has demonstrated as recently as yesterday when he refused to wear the glasses even though people paid for them, it's all about effort and control. Phil wants that extra money to come in every day without having to wear a vest or glasses or a cowboy hat or anything else that he doesn't want to do. It's all low effort, but it's still above what his lazy ass can handle.

Once he hits the tips goal, he's happy, and your happiness means nothing to him, and he expects you to accept that. He expects you to reward him for being lazy and never call attention to said laziness, ever. Dave and Linda raised a monster, but the retards are the ones keeping it alive.

 

[actually]

Unrelated to current events, but in regards to the troll fucking with Dave about 'buying' a statue, why was Dave so adamant about "This is not me selling you a statue. This is me sending you a gift in appreciation of your contribution."
Was he trying to skirt some kind of tax?

Twitch thing. They don't want streamers hawking shit on stream (directly; sponsorships are obviously a thing). So I'm betting it was a CYA move by Phil.

 

[TheGoutburglar]

Twitch thing. They don't want streamers hawking shit on stream (directly; sponsorships are obviously a thing). So I'm betting it was a CYA move by Phil.

I'm so glad somebody did that to him. Guy has been thumbing his nose at the rules and the concept of general decency his whole life, and quite frankly, that kind of karma should be happening a lot more often.

 

[PieceofShet]

I was wondering how long before the filing shows up in the public records...
IF. Of course.

 

[Iron Hamster]

Hard to take a "threat" like that seriously when they use a goofy name from the Arrested Development show.

A paypig using song titles and band names........
An alleged stalker making death threats under the name from a TV show.........

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

Why again does he try and claim he's so good at Third Strike? Last I checked he pretty much always gets bodied at 3rd because his gorilla brain can't handle the wealth of options that game provides compared to something more primitive like ST.

You know why Phil likes ST? Because it's broken as shit and he liked exploiting it's design flaws. Hence bullshit Vega in the PS1 port because he was broken. This is why he thinks every fighting game has online only patterns that make you win: patterns that make you win is literally how Phil became successful at Street Fighter.

I also find it laughable when he brings up his Tekken 3 trophy that he won as a kid at the mall tournament. Wow. I used to be one of the best Tekken 5 Dark Resurrection players in my country. No exaggeration or anything. You know how much me being the best player of T5DR in a shitty Slavic country means in the grand scheme of things? Googatz, that's what it means. If I attended any of the EVOs or major Tekken 5 DR tournaments in Japan back then I'm 99% sure I would've drowned in pools. Yet he always keeps bringing it up, it's like someone bragging about the 4th place karate trophy they got back when they were 10. Means absolutely shit. I mean we're all seen his Tekken gameplay and any fellow kiwis who are at least somewhat skilled at Tekken know how garbage his play is and how he barely uses movement.

 

[Anime Waifu NFT collector]

Yesterday Phil got triggered because people were mentioning the stroke face so he started moving his face to prove he doesn't have a stroke Phil,this is one of the faces he did LMAO,yeah Phil you totally didn't had a mini stroke.

First we had clown mode over not wearing the glasses that he said he was gonna wear,then when people mentioned the stroke face he tried to prove us wrong and only showed that he does have a stroke face,then we got the "fat face" rant that has nothing to do with anything.

 

[Fuckyoudad]

It's hilarious how much every other game he plays confirms that too. Watch him fight almost any boss in almost any game, and wait for him to whine that they changed the pattern!

Even in games where every attack is telegraphed from a mile away, he fails and eats it because the boss wasn't following the exact pattern he was expecting. Even when the move he gets hit with is some one-hit-kill move that has literally 5 seconds or more of charge time.

He's the ultimate reactionary gamer.

Imagine force-feeding yourself on a diet of videogames for the better part of your adult life and arriving at the conclusion that any shift in degree of challenge turns an interactive rendering of pattern recognition into a scrub puzzle boss that's bullshit dood. He truly wants to hold the thumbstick up, press a combination of about three buttons on a pad that houses around 15 of them and find that his inputs unlock the warp whistle and get him to the end credits without needing to engage his pea brain or his limited vidya motor skills. It's like his Average Gamer Brain stopped developing after playing Super Turbo.

There have been instances I can recall where it's quite clear he doesn't even test out every button in any given game.. he almost always waits on the game telling him to use it during the tutorial and if it doesn't tell him to do so chances are basic functions can be left unrealized for hours. This has always struck me as really weird coupled with the fact that if a game mechanic isn't completely essential then he'll maybe it use it once or twice and then forget it even exists.

Most people who play games do what they can to express themselves through their gameplay choices and combinations of actions in games.. but phil just never does this. His limited creative impulses seem entirely dedicated to his neverending lies, retcons and re-retcons., they're on tap for bullshit and that's as far as they go.

He truly wants an interactive cartoon every single time and still can't follow the structure of the plot through a fair amount of them because paying attention is difficult wheras goat laughing is Gin Ackai's method of hinting he understands or cares about what's going on when the only narrative he seems to be following is the story of the expanding pig purse.

It's almost like The Last of Us 2 itself is a puzzle boss narrative because he doesn't recognize a pattern that involves characters in relationships who do normal things like smoke weed and have sex and aren't acting simply as the next waypoint to gachatown. Square that with a non-linear structure and a method of delivery that doesn't preach to you anime style about how these characters actions should make you feel and you have on your hands a dangerous cocktail of machinations that are tough to swallow and lead to his depression acting up on twitter for Dr. Uckmann to contend with.

 

[gobsmackedmortician]

Phil stroke face is from years of taking the bait, the lips done

 

[Forbidden Math]

Yes


Okay, so like beating Phil takes a modicum of skill. Credit where its due. Even if he wouldn't. Phil isn't bad at Street Fighter. I mean its always that he does exactly what he accuses people of. He memorizes a pattern and rides it to hell. So, you need to be able to beat that to beat him. And that takes knowledge of the game and a little skill. Because a good pattern and flowchart is the first level of being good. It means you know the stuff and how to do it. And that takes time. Where Phil fails is the people who can go a step past. The people who know how the patterns work and why they work. And turn that against him.

To put in short for you people who have kissed a girl. Phil has enough know how and skill to know that X beats Y. And he knows every variation of X and Y. But he is hopeless when people introduce a Z that beats X.

I just wanted to note that Phil also generally gets bodied by rushdown players who do things he wasn't expecting. Other than that accurate.

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Twitch thing. They don't want streamers hawking shit on stream (directly; sponsorships are obviously a thing). So I'm betting it was a CYA move by Phil.

If I recall the lore correctly as I understood it, Phil banned Supermeatboy and told him never to come back. SMB emailed Phil and offered to send him a large amount of money. Phil agreed under the condition that SMB doesn't tell anyone.

You see, it was tax related but not in the way you guys are thinking. He wasn't trying to dodge paying taxes on the income. He wanted the money to be secret so he could continue to ask for thousands of dollars to pay his taxes. He didn't want his paypigs to know he was getting all that money off stream.

So SMB released the emails. He didn't send Phil the money. And Phil implemented the "no behind the scenes money" policy because trolls would use it to make up lies that Phil was recieving money for taxes and then ask for the same amount on stream.

This is also why he disabled his Streamlabs leaderboard. We could see he was recieving large amounts of money off stream and at the same time crying how slow things were and he couldn't afford food.

 

[TheGoutburglar]

What gets me about his shittiness at fighting games in particular is that he actually likes them, so disinterest isn't an issue, yet his laziness and stupidity are still enough to prevent him from getting better because even when he enjoys something that doesn't over-ride his desire to rest on his laurels.

The real kicker, though, is the flow of bullshit that pours out of him after he loses a match, because with Bloodbourne or some shit, the jury is out on whether or not he's lying or just a fucking idiotic poser. But with fighting games, he is definitely aware of the truth. He knows exactly how to be good so that he doesn't lose often enough to be a joke, yet he still does the lazy thing and run from legit opponents instead of work on getting better.

Basically what I'm getting at is that he may have rolled a 20 in Luck, but he did same thing with Sloth. Nothing overcomes it. Nothing.

@Sparkletor 2.0 I wish more people that Phil dealt with had the integrity to bust him like that. Imagine an email dump done by the whalechairs he has has an obvious arrangement with for almost a year. That would be such glorious karma.

 

[SauceRyuKen]

I also find it laughable when he brings up his Tekken 3 trophy that he won as a kid at the mall tournament. Wow. I used to be one of the best Tekken 5 Dark Resurrection players in my country. No exaggeration or anything. You know how much me being the best player of T5DR in a shitty Slavic country means in the grand scheme of things? Googatz, that's what it means. If I attended any of the EVOs or major Tekken 5 DR tournaments in Japan back then I'm 99% sure I would've drowned in pools. Yet he always keeps bringing it up, it's like someone bragging about the 4th place karate trophy they got back when they were 10. Means absolutely shit. I mean we're all seen his Tekken gameplay and any fellow kiwis who are at least somewhat skilled at Tekken know how garbage his play is and how he barely uses movement.

He fares a lot worse in 3D fighters generally since they're way more open ended and much less flowchart-friendly. Tekken 7 was made to focus less on movement and a lot more scrub friendly in general. Flowcharts and just pushing buttons are more of a thing. Still, his playthrough of it was absolutely horrible.

His "Better than staple" combo with Paul did a stunning 43 damage with no wallcarry in season 1... Back when Paul was known for being able to halfshot off a launcher with 0 execution to begin with. Paul's basic-ass combo back then: Launcher, mid punch into screw kick, phoenix smasher. That's it. ~67 damage and more with a wall, decent wallcarry. Phil stood by his assertion that his custom combo was better. It was launcher, jab, jab, flash elbow-phoenix breaker. His gameplan consisted of holding back and tentatively throwing phoenix smashers, seemingly at random. He didn't even use demoman that much.

When he moved on to other characters, he did similarly bad. King who didn't even know how to chainthrow, Bob, a character known for excellent poking and great movement (He has a wavedash) who he used as an absolutely scrubby string masher, and Lili, a character known for mostly being bad but having the saving grace of excellent evasive moves and superior movement... That he never used. He did Street Fighter footsies on Tekken. Like, hold forward and back. He's not even at that "You're almost a serious player" level where you can't backdash properly but you can at least ladderstep. With the horrifying nerfs movement caught in general, it's a great time to have poor movement and play Tekken regardless. Some of the pros even have remarkably shitty backdashes. (Joey Fury's backdash is there but not really crisp, almost all of Pakistan doesn't even move well yet they're regarded as strong players.)

Him winning a Tekken 3 tournament can only have happened in one of two ways: Either he picked Ogre, who was grossly imbalanced, or King and nobody knew how to throw break. Maybe he picked True Ogre and spammed fire and no one was equipped to deal with that either. Again, this sort of thing matters. A win's a win, sure, but if you're only winning because everyone else is 12, it's 1999 and you're picking Jin and actually have combos and a consistent electric vs a sea of buttonmashing Eddy and Hwoarang players, it's nothing but the expected outcome. In Phil's case, I wager he was just one amongst the many other kids who were bad at Tekken who just happened to get lucky and won. If it's even true.

Then again, Phil is the type of guy to unironically brag about beating his mom in a FT10 at Marvel. Any accomplishment is great when he achieves it.

TheGoutburglar said:
What gets me about his shittiness at fighting games in particular is that he actually likes them, so disinterest isn't an issue, yet his laziness and stupidity are still enough to prevent him from getting better because even when he enjoys something that doesn't over-ride his desire to rest on his laurels.

The real kicker, though, is the flow of bullshit that pours out of him after he loses a match, because with Bloodbourne or some shit, the jury is out on whether or not he's lying or just a fucking idiotic poser. But with fighting games, he is definitely aware of the truth. He knows exactly how to be good so that he doesn't lose often enough to be a joke, yet he still does the lazy thing and run from legit opponents instead of work on getting better.

Basically what I'm getting at is that he may have rolled a 20 in Luck, but he did same thing with Sloth. Nothing overcomes it. Nothing.

@Sparkletor 2.0 I wish more people that Phil dealt with had the integrity to bust him like that. Imagine an email dump done by the whalechairs he has has an obvious arrangement with for almost a year. That would be such glorious karma.

The thing is that even if Phil likes some fighting games, he still likes winning more. This completely stalls him as a player and prevents any sort of growth. Half the people playing a fighting game lose. It's not as much as a battle royale game, for sure, but it's still a lot. Players that get to the top understand that wins are nice, but growth is meaningful. If they manage to stick through the losses and actually improve, they'll get to win more often, and wins will eventually lose what little meaning they already had. Audiences aren't gonna boo you for trying to punch above your weight, it's all part of the process. Maybe you'll actually get there some day. Ultimately, if you lose to someone who's more or less on your skill level, or is using a character you don't know, or something else, you gotta admit that the games, usually, aren't so imbalanced that one guy's gonna be able to consistently win over the others without a significant skill gap between them. Phil is exactly that type of player. The one that will pick softbanned chars to win. The one that needs the game to be horribly busted and imbalanced so he can exploit it to death and never, or almost never, lose. And due to his lack of creativity, adaptability and imagination, he won't even find the things that are busted himself, needing others to discover them for him. This is why he managed to do as well as he did in tournament. Super Turbo is an ancient, figured out game. All the info was there for him to read up on. I seriously doubt he picked up on Vega being busted on the PS version himself.

That's precisely the problem with Phil. He refuses to grow because all he wants are easy wins. That's why as Gojitenks, who was more or less on par with Phil when they started fighting has grown and overtaken Phil, Phil's answer is to just duck him on sight. He refuses to play ranked because he knows he'll eventually hit a wall and need to get in the lab and improve. Going on that sort of ranking up, getting stronger and learning journey makes you vulnerable on some level, and Phil's not vulnerable, he's a former pro badass who can wipe the floor with all those he meets! Provided they are Brazilian ten year olds or other people who can't be arsed to get better.

EDIT: To not double post.

 

[Surly Muppet]

Phil is suggesting that the next Viewer's Choice marathon be locked to retro games that he already played (not within the last 5 years). He explained that Kat put on RPG music last night to relax and the Chrono Trigger soundtrack played. Phil explained in depth that he would like to play CT again.
So he basically wants to play CT and is already trying to steer people to vote for that in this theoretical event. He'll probably play it regardless and probably to use it to stall on playing whatever actually wins.
He is trying to get people to pay him for an event, to play a game (CT or otherwise) that he would likely have picked up again anyway, and then will beg during playthrough. He really loathes that he has to play Divinity.
Phil is getting frustrated that people are suggesting games that he hasn't played, and is telling them they need to go search if he ever played the game themselves - if he didn't, it is ineligible. Classic TIHYDP views are about to get a sudden surge...

@LyteSydeByll Any thoughts on the fact that, as you have been playing CT, Phil has suddenly had the revelation that he needs to play it as well? Seems like a strange coincidence to me...

EDIT: Phil said people were spamming his new emote last night during SF because it is great, and they said it is the best emote that he has ever added.
Nobody has said this. Nobody.
They're spamming it because it is one of the ugliest emotes on Twitch and a complete meme.
Phil has also mentioned a few times that it was made by PolishFrog, so I'm now not sure it isn't just a complete troll emote.

EDIT 2: All Phil can do about the death threats is report them, keep his panic button handy, and be ready to defend themselves if necessary.
Phil is afraid for his family, yeah, of course, because of the death threats.

But he is more afraid that he would have to fight and hurt someone.

There will now be no further follow up on this topic. Phil won't dwell on it every day because that's what these people want, to terrify someone.
So we posted it publicly and now will memoryhole it, thank you for the pity money.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

Tekken 7 was made to focus less on movement and a lot more scrub friendly in general. Flowcharts and just pushing buttons are more of a thing. Still, his playthrough of it was absolutely horrible.

Not to mention how the game just devolved into spamming crush moves and how every character has at least one move which does at least 3-4 of the following: fast, long-range, CH launcher, safe, full-circular, mid, big damage, good hitbox, crushes highs, crushes lows. So all you do is spam that one move for like 33% of a round, especially if it's a safe move. 7's to Tekken what SFV is to Street Fighter and he still sucked at it just as much as he did suck at Tekken Tag 2 which is probably the hardest to get good at in the series just due to the sheer amount of characters and having to basically make your own combos if you don't play some overplayed team.

Him winning a Tekken 3 tournament can only have happened in one of two ways: Either he picked Ogre, who was grossly imbalanced, or King and nobody knew how to throw break. Maybe he picked True Ogre and spammed fire and no one was equipped to deal with that either. Again, this sort of thing matters. A win's a win, sure, but if you're only winning because everyone else is 12, it's 1999 and you're picking Jin and actually have combos and a consistent electric vs a sea of buttonmashing Eddy and Hwoarang players, it's nothing but the expected outcome. In Phil's case, I wager he was just one amongst the many other kids who were bad at Tekken who just happened to get lucky and won. If it's even true.

It's the latter 100%. I mean, it was '99. You didn't have a sea of videos made by people teaching you the most basic bitch things about frame data and punishing. Just getting your big brother that was in university to download khambos and print them out for you while he was studying at the library gave you a massive edge. Unless you were in one of the active arcade scenes a "mid-tier player" back then had equivalent skills as a Day 1 Scrub does today. He said it, it was a mall trophy. Jin EWGF khambos? Nigga all you needed to dunk on other prepubescent scrubs back in the day is knowing how to do Phoenix Smasher and attack the Hwo/Eddy kickmashing scrubs by just guarding until their string ended, then unleashing the Phoenix Smasher and you'd get them in a CH every time. Speaking from experience here and I wasn't even a decent enough Tekken player until I really got into Dark Resurrection. That's why I don't doubt the veracity of his claim, but it's such a miniscule accomplishment that it makes him sound so pathetic.

 

[Iron Hamster]

If I recall the lore correctly as I understood it, Phil banned Supermeatboy and told him never to come back. SMB emailed Phil and offered to send him a large amount of money. Phil agreed under the condition that SMB doesn't tell anyone.

You see, it was tax related but not in the way you guys are thinking. He wasn't trying to dodge paying taxes on the income. He wanted the money to be secret so he could continue to ask for thousands of dollars to pay his taxes. He didn't want his paypigs to know he was getting all that money off stream.

So SMB released the emails. He didn't send Phil the money. And Phil implemented the "no behind the scenes money" policy because trolls would use it to make up lies that Phil was recieving money for taxes and then ask for the same amount on stream.

This is also why he disabled his Streamlabs leaderboard. We could see he was recieving large amounts of money off stream and at the same time crying how slow things were and he couldn't afford food.

So can he still get money through streamlabs but it doesn't show up on stream?

 

[Lean In Ban]

Phil just said that he was afraid to hurt someone if they ever broke into the snort fort and he wasn’t being sarcastic at all about it. Imagine this geriatric fending off trolls with a hand axe. Lmao bro I fuckin can’t