Worst lyrics of all time - For the music fans who would rather have a piece of toast than see a ghost

[EmpireOfTheClouds]

“My lifestyle determines my death style”
-Metallica, Frantic

It sticks out to me for not only being patently retarded, but the shitty delivery really seals the deal for me.

FRAYUNTICK TICK TICK TICK TAWK!!!!

 

[Samson Pumpkin Jr.]

"She has my name to the name
don't call it a bane
I love her so much"
- Black Fatlia, "Angel's KIss"

 

[Reverend]

Any Metallica song.

 

[Hongourable Madisha]

Chet Hanx, Tom Hanks's rapping son, had some amazingly bad lines. "I'll stab you in the pee hole, with a ski pole" is my favourite for how perfectly it encapsulates an out of touch rich kid trying to sound like a violent gangsta rapper.

 

[All Cops Are Based]

"When the laws of God just make you pissed
You better become an atheist"
- Leftover Crack, "Atheist Anthem"

 

[EmpireOfTheClouds]

Chet Hanx, Tom Hanks's rapping son, had some amazingly bad lines. "I'll stab you in the pee hole, with a ski pole" is my favourite for how perfectly it encapsulates an out of touch rich kid trying to sound like a violent gangsta rapper.

That is so stupid it's actually brilliant.

 

[OvercookedBacon]

The first one reminds me so much of "There were birds and plants and rocks and things" from Horse With No Name.

When you look at it as a song about some random guy tripping massive balls and wandering around the desert, it makes sense. Sort of.

 

[EmpireOfTheClouds]

When you look at it as a song about some random guy tripping massive balls and wandering around the desert, it makes sense. Sort of.

What's even better is almost immediately after it is "The heat was hot".

 

[ee.zdoom]

worst lyrics are the lyrics to e girls are ruining my life by corpse husband i cant listen to that song without cringing

 

[I.B. Niggin]

I don't think it gets any worse than "if the devil wear Prada, then Adam and Eve wear nada"

 

[protomartyr]

Finally have a place to share the gem Spotify served me up recently.

Shit so cool, and you so fine​

You so fine I eat behind, between yo legs​

In yo jeans, take those off, now watch you spread​

You special and so pink ​

Slightly hairy yet don’t stink​

Lord I thank you for this good food that I’m happy to receive​

​

GoldLink - Dance On Me​

Train are also terrible for this. Just unfathomably bizarre.

Your lipstick stains on the front lobe of my left-side brain​

[...]
My heart is bound to beat right out my untrimmed chest​

[...]​

So gangsta, I’m so thug, you’re the only thing I’m dreaming of​

Train - Hey, Soul Sister​

And the shape of her body - unusual​

Meeting Virginia​

Just a shy guy, looking for a 2-ply​

Hefty Bag to hold my love​

When you move me, everything is groovy​

They don’t like it sue me​

Ooh the way you do me​

Drive By​

​

 

[EmpireOfTheClouds]

Anything by Vampire Weekend. Pure shit.

As a young girl
Louis Vuitton
With your mother
On a sandy lawn

As a sophomore
With reggaeton
And the linens
You’re sittin’ on

Is your bed made?
Is your sweater on?
Do you want to fuck like you know I do?
Like you know I do, ooh, ooh, ooh,
ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
ooh, ooh, ooh

But this feels so unnatural, Peter Gabriel too
But it feels so unnatural, Peter Gabriel

Can you stay up
To see the dawn?
In the colors
Of Benetton

Is your bed made?
Is your sweater on?
Do you want to, like you know I do?
Like you know I do, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,

 

[protomartyr]

snip

I love Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa. The lyrics are basic but it does a fine job of capturing that preppy vibe they're going for. When you get to their 3rd album I think Hannah Hunt is honestly really beautiful and well-written, especially by pop rock standards.

 

[EmpireOfTheClouds]

I love Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa. The lyrics are basic but it does a fine job of capturing that preppy vibe they're going for. When you get to their 3rd album I think Hannah Hunt is honestly really beautiful and well-written, especially by pop rock standards.

Tbf I'm not a huge fan of theirs, but I'll admit A-Punk definitely slaps.

 

[Hongourable Madisha]

Nightwish always had bad generic gothy or whiny lyrics written by their Nice Guy keyboardist - it was a good thing their first singer had such a thick accent and was an opera singer so sacrificed diction for range and projection and you could barely make them out. But Song Of Myself is terrible even for them. It sounds like it's a love song to lolcows:

"An old man gets naked and kisses a model-doll in his attic
It's half-light and he's in tears.
When he finally cums his eyes are cascading.

An obese girl enters an elevator with me.
All dressed up fancy, a green butterfly on her neck.
Terribly sweet perfume deafens me.
She's going to dinner alone.
That makes her even more beautiful."

 

[EmpireOfTheClouds]

Nightwish always had bad generic gothy or whiny lyrics written by their Nice Guy keyboardist - it was a good thing their first singer had such a thick accent and was an opera singer so sacrificed diction for range and projection and you could barely make them out. But Song Of Myself is terrible even for them. It sounds like it's a love song to lolcows:

"An old man gets naked and kisses a model-doll in his attic
It's half-light and he's in tears.
When he finally cums his eyes are cascading.

An obese girl enters an elevator with me.
All dressed up fancy, a green butterfly on her neck.
Terribly sweet perfume deafens me.
She's going to dinner alone.
That makes her even more beautiful."

Those are all from the original poem the song is based on.

 

[Power Ranger Monster]

Oh yeah, "War Pigs" brought this in spades:
"Generals gathered in their masses, just like witches at black masses"
"Poisoning their brainwashed minds"
"Politicians hide themselves away, they only started the war"
"Satan laughing spreads his wings"

 

[Hongourable Madisha]

Those are all from the original poem the song is based on.

I did not know that, I guess the poem's my pick for worst lyrics then!

 

[Enola Straight]

“Young, black and famous!
With money hanging out the anus!"

Nice imagery, P.Diddy. Thanks, I hate it.

 

[EmpireOfTheClouds]

Some more candidates.

"Your butt is mine"
-Michael Jackson, "Bad"
No, Michael. MY butt is mine.

"I'm talking pedicures on my toes, toes"
Ke$ha, "TiK ToK"
Yano, I'm actually glad she clarified where she gets those pedicures. 2010 Kesha strikes me as the kind of woman who, if she didn't, would get those pedicures on her eyeballs.

"What rhymes with hug me?"
Robin Thicke, "Blurred Lines"
Rugby?