Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

Da Dude123 said:
He had that filthy Bigfoot hat with the bottle opener on it for a while. It didn't work to attract the baby zooms.
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It's almost like it's not about the hats at all. Color me shocked.

But at least if he blames it on the hats he can't blame it on him being as appealing as chewed bubble gum stuck underneath a bus stop bench.
 
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Deathsprinkles said:
Multiple people have suggested to him to try it but he just scoffs it off and goes back to mooing about how plenty good he is.

A lolcow doesn't take advice. That's why it's entertaining to watch them suffer.
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He won’t wear a hat for the same reason all the “gorgeous” young women at SCC were suddenly too tall, too short, too fat, too thin or not wearing a face mask the day he decided to enact “Wern 2.0.”

It’s because Lucas deliberately puts roadblocks in his own way to justify his cowardice in talking to women. He secretly knows wearing a hat or saying “Hi I’m Lucas” won’t melt panties and get the girls all over him. It’s why he doesn’t DO those things, because it would instantly disprove all this complaints.

He needs to define other, younger, fitter men as clones who only get women because they have the right password or wear the right hat...because otherwise he has to admit that other men get dates because they aren’t disgusting-looking like Lucas, they don’t have awkward, cowardly, toxic personalities like Lucas, they don’t have mental problems like Lucas and they have security and reliability to offer a girl, unlike Lucas.

Lucas, in his mind, is Plenty Good, so clearly the only reason other men get dates and he doesn’t is because they have the right hat or something. But Lucas can’t wear said Right Hat because he’s better than that and not a sell-out.

He knows that’s a load of shite, deep down. He knows he’s mental, dirty, unattractive, weak and worthless, not to mention the shameful owner of the world’s tiniest micro-penis. But he has to tell himself otherwise to keep from crashing down in despair.
 
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Maxxicus Callahan said:
At least he has some level of self awareness
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Lucas: PROVIDE THE INFORMATION!

Someone (obviously trolling him, but still): Offers the information.

Lucas: F A K E.

Poop Chute said:
If he thinks the girls love hats, why doesn't he just wear a fucking hat?
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He tried a few months ago, then angrily justified it as, depending on the video:

1. "A CURVED bill blocks LIGHT from your EYES. I'm wearing a hat CORRECTLY, clones!"

2. "I'm trying to look like a tourist so women will talk to me."

eee-e2 said:
What do you think it would cost to get Lucas Werner an IP2 esque livestreaming setup so we can watch him IRL stream? Decent phone, battery packs, bluetooth speaker, selfie stick?
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He wouldn't.

He used to livestream on youtube when he still had the closet of an apartment and he stopped due to "all the negativity" from people who came into his chat, couldn't figure out how moderation worked or even how to turn chat off, was mad about negative comments (which is why he disabled them), and had whole strings of videos where he raged about people disliking his videos.

The ones that clearly show his mental level were the ones that he used tactics like "like or dislike if you love me" and "dislike if you're gay", then was completely fuckin' baffled that it didn't make anyone stop.
 
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eee-e2 said:
What do you think it would cost to get Lucas Werner an IP2 esque livestreaming setup so we can watch him IRL stream? Decent phone, battery packs, bluetooth speaker, selfie stick?
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He's already getting money he doesn't work for so why the hell spend to set him up to live stream.

ETA:
Initially he signed up for the HED class and the online biology. Now he's saying he's in an economics class too.

1612733773591.png
 
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mothman96 said:
"Do what the background buzz say do or the opposite, of course"--the voices in his head have been really active since he went back to college.

View attachment 1902439

ETA:

If he passes biology it'll be another repeat of "giving him the grade" because financial aid will not cover another retake of the class.

ETA2:
View attachment 1902482

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Sounds like lucas is going full ralph wiggum


No wonder the little girls wanted nothing to do with him as a child

The fact he is being so open about hearing these 'background voices' now is a red flag as well. He never used to admit anything that made him sound schizophrenic. He also got real agitated whenever people asked him about the voices on the wind. Now he's being blatantly open and all but admitting it like its a totally normal thing and everyone has it

mero said:
He blamed caffeine for that time he threw a glass in a restaurant because some guys girlfriend was younger than Suzanne, and that was just his sodie pops. Watch out Spokane, he's gonna be throwing whole dinner services across the street if he finishes that can.

Exactly. He basically called bs on his own domestic abuse alibi and is too stupid to realize it

Poop Chute said:
If he thinks the girls love hats, why doesn't he just wear a fucking hat?
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When he starts doing that its time to convince him that zoomers just love those horned viking opera helmets. Seeing him walk around spokane with a horned helmet on would be hilarious
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WonderWino said:
The fact he is being so open about hearing these 'background voices' now is a red flag as well. He never used to admit anything that made him sound schizophrenic. He also got real agitated whenever people asked him about the voices on the wind. Now he's being blatantly open and all but admitting it like its a totally normal thing and everyone has it
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This baffles me. Surely Lucas has been told that hearing voices is not normal. He's been in mental hospitals, seen doctors, previously been on medication, etc. These mental health professionals evaluate their patients, give treatment, and then continuously reevaluate. Hearing voices is one of the things they would be aiming to eliminate and he would know that. They would be asking him things like, "are you still hearing voices?" or, "have the frequency with which you hear these voices decreased at all?"

Has he really gone off the deep end so much that he now thinks that the rest of us are hearing voices, despite his past experiences? If so, his brain must be significantly deteriorating. I have to wonder how much worse it will get.
 
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boner_alert said:
It's really a shame that the greedy fat faggot has been tainted so irrevocably with food/hotel/cash, for which in exchange all we got were schizo pedo screaming amounting to the same exact 11 sentences over and over

Because while still always fun to dig up old posts or threads for new analysis or the sporadic exposure of Lucas' impressive scabby dick pic to revitalize our passion in Wernology/welcome newcomers, the interview by @Jeremiah the Bullfrog was a really fascinating milestone in Wernological excavation

The interviews by the dipshit Goldaor were interesting despite the worst execution possible. He had the advantage of novelty, the very first to be able to pick Lucas' brain in a series of direct in-depth interviews, and the thrill and excitement of all this had kiwis in a blind frenzy in the beginning. I'll admit, I participated with the gusto and zest of a middle aged anti-gay republican at a bathhouse, and it wasn't until a few kiwis, who had wised up fairly quickly, began to express disgust at the indulgence that I realized the Golden USB interviews were doing more good for Lucas than not. It was too late by then.

And even worse, after Jeremiah's interview, I realized it is possible to properly question Lucas, to expose his past and psyche, and despite all the catfishing, Lucas' gullibility and desperation for social interaction will maintain, leaving the door open for more similar excavations in the future

But Lucas, the lolcow as we knew him was gone, having grown accustomed to exuberant suckling and licking of his asshole by Goldaor. 2 overpriced custom ordered demanded meals for every episode. where he was given free reign to ramble about whatever the fuck he wanted, finally being recognized for the incredibly important genius he always knew he was

The interviews by the geekroom were a complete shitshow and a total waste of time. Their sloppy half ass 'research' started and stopped at the Starbucks incident and most of the time was spent with several losers taking turns trying to flex on a piss soaked obese schizo hobo and only further exacerbated Lucas' delusions of grandeur and brattiness

I could see your approach being effective, I'm actually really curious and would love to see its implementation but not if it means any kind of monetary exchange or reward for the diseased pedo fuck. It's always been known that Lucas is a fat faggot with serious certifiable delusions of grandeur. His desperate desire for validation and attention/accomplishment may actually even surpass his disgusting bottomless pit of a stomach and I think he could've been finessed into giving interviews for free but I don't believe its ever a possibility now
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I agree. I would like an opportunity to interview him but not give him anything. I feel like giving him anything just enables him.
 
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