DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[Piece of Peace]

What's going to happen when these four are tapped out by the end of the week and Phil needs to pay ''mah bills'' before Valentines Day?

Somewhat related, but in general I want stimulus checks to be given out (even though I don't qualify for them), except for the fact that some microscopic amount of my hard-earned tax dollars will inevitably be funneled into this fat fuck via his braindead wheelchairs.

 

[JamFlowMan]

"Today was amazing for support but I need to keep this going for both wednesday and thursday, alright?"

Also Friday, Saturday, Sunday, everyday next week, the week after, all of March, April, May, the rest of the year, everyday of 2022, 2023, don't forget 2024 is a leap year so that adds an extra day, 2025, 2026, 2027...

 

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

Phil, a heartfelt message from me to you.

I'm not a spiteful person but I truly want you to feel what real anxiety is. The kind that actually cripples you. The kind that takes over your life and controls it with an iron fist.
The kind where your brain physically changes the way it behaves to make you feel that way all the time. The kind where you don't get off with just a bad night sleep, but with years of terrible sleep to the point it drives you insane.
The kind where your body physically suffers and grinds to a halt.

I have been living that life for years and after hearing your rant from yesterday, I genuinely want you to experience it.
Not because I hate people or am a psychopath, but because you keep whining and complaining without changing a single fucking thing.

A person cannot have genuine money problems when:
- He can still afford to eat out once a week, minimum (excluding pre-made overpriced food and probably a fuck ton of extra premium grade snacks and whatever else disappears into that gut)
- He can afford to waste money on mobile games
- He lives in a house in an area multiple hundreds of thousands of dollars above his means

After a certain point you lose all the right to pity and that point has now been crossed more than a hundred times over.
The only thing deserving pity here is your emotional intellect for trying to pull this shit on stream.

I can't wait for that medical emergency and all the paypigs have flown, know that I will be watching

Talk like that about my friend again and you're gonna have trouble. I dare you. I grew up on the mean streets of my momma's loving arms combing my hair with spit before high school where the kids called my head weird.

Jokes aside Phil willfully refuses reality. He could be a quadraplegic and he'd still be hitting his phone with his nose looking for that four star Randy Orton and ACKACKACKing at Leslie Nielsen movies. You could swap the bodies of Phil and a Burundi child soldier, and he'd be complaining to the troop leader about Tutsis abusing cover.

There's no dark situation you could put Phil in where he'd learn anything or become someone different. He facetanks every challenge that comes his way, whether it's a relationship, bacon grease, or gay bejewelled. You could put Phil in a concentration camp and he'd be like DOOD this shit takes forever. Hello yes Im jewish can we PLEASE GET OUT OF HERE?? FUCK man im never coming here again this sucks. Nazis are dumb shitheads WHERE AM I SHOWERING YOU STILL HAVEN'T TOLD ME? DO YOU WANT ME TO RUN THIS CAMP FOR YOU?

In a way it's almost admirable.

 

[grump]

I'm watching videos from Amazon workers and I am thankful I don't have work like that...and hopefully I will never have to...knock on wood...I wonder how long he'd last in one of those jobs...five minutes is my guess.

 

[Balr0g]

I'm watching videos from Amazon workers and I am thankful I don't have work like that...and hopefully I will never have to...knock on wood...I wonder how long he'd last in one of those jobs...five minutes is my guess.

He would ask for a handcart after 1 minute and will be laughed out of the office. He wil then try to carry a gallon of milk and collapse on the floor crying about bugged carrying mechanics

 

[Gramh]

"I was bear maced dood there was nothing I could do. I was blocking! Bugged robot mechanics. Whu? You want me to skip my 30 minute bathroom break?"

 

[Nurse Ratchet]

This isn't even funny right now. He became a parody of himself today.

Yeah no, it's still funny. Funny as fuck, actually. I'd even say it has risen to the point of absolutely fucking hysterical. And he still has so much farther to fall from here.

Yesterday was one of the only pREEEEsteams I've ever listened to twice, & I laughed even harder through it the second time. And I'll probably give it a third.

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

Just listened to the prestream where Phil talks about Jasper jumping on his face while sleeping.....

Did Jasper try to legit kill Phil?

Is Jasper a dectractor that infiltrated the Gout compound?

Jasper is a deep cover agent who trained at the best Pussyninja academy, he is eternally patient, lethal, efficient. His mission: steal the Golden Andre the giant card and if necessary, pee in the goutsauce.

 

[DeeTracktor]

Phil claiming his cat beat him up so he needs money because his life sucks is more embarrassing than the incident, the Silver vest, Leanna leaving him, and his hair line combined!

It's my favourite bit of lore and I wonder how far he will go with it. I mean Jasper better be careful of Phil and his hand axe

 

[Malcolm Tucker]

I think Phil has finally found his begging final form. You know that next month when it comes to Twitch payment time he is going to hit out with the "Well if you guys remember last month where everyone was super supportive with tips for whatever reason. I got my Twitch cheque through and it's not good. I'm going to need tips now to cover this!"

 

[Donut Coma]

Genuine question: what was the last video game on stream that DSP looked like he was genuinely having fun playing?

Transformers: Devastation, October 2015. I like that playthrough because it's one of the last times he conveyed genuine pleasure in what he was playing and made the game look interesting. He was, for him, vibrant. Unfortunately, that was when he hit his nadir for views. He was streaming for 120-ish people on YouTube and those pre-streams are really the saddest he's ever sounded.

That's about the best I can remember, and even that was sullied by poor attendance. Couldn't tell you since then; 2015 was the last year I could stand listening to his raw gameplay.

 

[Esquilax]

An open letter to Phil on his Farms Reading Day,

Phil, you are at a crossroads in your life. There comes a time for most people where they have to make decisions that they don't like, that scare them, that they're uncomfortable with. A lot of times, even most times, these changes are positive for them in the long run. You've made big, positive decisions for change in the past: moving out of Connecticut, moving Kat out to you, marrying her, acquiring your son Jasper. Many people would be afraid and worried about doing big steps like that.

But now, you have more decisions that have been scratching at your oddly shaped head for years, you keep putting Band-Aids on it and pushing it off and it's only making you suffer. You need to make the change of your life and decide to not live such a volatile career. You know, and have said as much, online content creation is not a guarantee paycheck. It's not paying your bills, very clearly it's not meeting your daily needs as a job, career, future. Continuing streaming as you are is a downward spiral, and whether you admit it or not, you know this, you know it's been detrimental to your health and your relationships.

Any person in your shoes has to decide at some point, do I leave my job and find a steady paycheck without the chargebacks, with the benefits of insurance and stability, or do I change my bills and spending needs by moving? Phil, you need to realize that this is an inevitability, and no matter how much you cry on stream and squeeze blood from your stone audience, this will not change this fact. At what point do you put yourself and your family in front of "sticking it to the trolls"?

For the sake of my entertainment, please never do because you're hilariously creative at finding a new way to weasel through your miserable, shambled life. If I didn't have tractor videos to watch while I work I would be too fucking bored to function.

Thanks for being a roach, Phil!

 

[gaarashatan]

i hope someone puts up a ton of clips soon, i dont watch phil but tonight sounds crazy funny. would love to see it ~_~

 

[gettingthatgrooveback]

I'm kinda annoyed when I read people telling Phil to get a job. Seriously, look at it from his perspective, e-begging makes him 6 figures, why would he stop? That's what Phil says, and he's totally right. And I hate listening to him when he's right. The source of all his problems is his spending. For a self-employed person, his income is pretty consistent actually. So please, stop believing that getting a regular job would help him. The rational thing for an e-beggar in this situation is to keep begging.

 

[OverlySensitive]

I'm kinda annoyed when I read people telling Phil to get a job. Seriously, look at it from his perspective, e-begging makes him 6 figures, why would he stop? That's what Phil says, and he's totally right. And I hate listening to him when he's right. The source of all his problems is his spending. For a self-employed person, his income is pretty consistent actually. So please, stop believing that getting a regular job would help him. The rational thing for an e-beggar in this situation is to keep begging.

I agree . Phil has no reason to work when he is doing just fine with his begging day to day he is being supported well and has zero reason to give up his well paying "job" for something where he would barely make minimum wage.

His job is begging and he likes it and it pays well why would he give it up to actually work for a living when so many are so willing to throw him a hundred dollars or more a day for just waking and wanking?

I do like telling him to get a real job tho. Its fun to imagine the interview for me....

 

[Esquilax]

I'm kinda annoyed when I read people telling Phil to get a job. Seriously, look at it from his perspective, e-begging makes him 6 figures, why would he stop? That's wha t Phil says, and he's totally right. And I hate listening to him when he's right. The source of all his problems is his spending. For a self-employed person, his income is pretty consistent actually. So please, stop believing that getting a regular job would help him. The rational thing for an e-beggar in this situation is to keep begging.

When training a pig you have to offer 2 options, one you know they'll never do, the other is the obvious choice. Phil is a smart little oinker, he knows he makes good money hating his jahb for sped nickels. The obvious choice is being less of a child with his money. Still, you can lead a pig to water, but he'd rather squeal it's poison rather than the cure to his dehydration.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

Now that we received a gold dust harvest from him admitting that he got beat up by Jasper and that Khet possibly doesn't sleep in the same room as him, I can't wait until he does the inevitable - declare it a detractor meme, LiMB anyone talking about it, deny and/or deboonk it.
Especially the latter, it's a lose-lose situation for him, either he admits they don't sleep in the same room, admits that he's a manchild who sleeps until 1PM (not like we didn't know that already), though he could also handwave it away by saying that he was doing his taxes all night, or he makes up something even crazier which will most likely result in even more gold dust.

 

[Very Honest Content]

Little surprising how Piggys been able to throw out cocksucker as much as he has in the past year and not so much as a mention from the Twitch nudnicks, the one that comes to mind is the "im coming for you" to I think it was Superhound that got him the suspensions.

Pretty sure that was on Youtube after a false dmca takedown had occurred, so Twitch won't care.

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

Now that we received a gold dust harvest from him admitting that he got beat up by Jasper and that Khet possibly doesn't sleep in the same room as him, I can't wait until he does the inevitable - declare it a detractor meme

Phil has already LIMB status'd the "Katherine sleeps in another room" belief since he's slipped it out before and there was a faint reflection of a bed in one of Phil's creepy back of Katherine's head shots in her "office".

 

[Iron Hamster]

Stolen from alexandros, is Phil going schizo? Why is he in chat hours after his stream ended?View attachment 1906524

Context:
View attachment 1906526

Guarantee he always watches chat like a hawk.

Ok that makes sense, thank you! I remember sending my friend some cash on paypal last year, and I had to cough up the extra fee to cover the transaction because it was from my debit card. I sent him like 60 bucks, but it ended up costing me like an extra 2 bucks or something. So I guess this jackass is essentially covering that fee every time he "refunds" a tip. So he is getting dinged with small transaction fees for every refund. Not much, but its still enough to make a dent. Kinda like the 1% fee he pays every time to withdraw the money immediately from his paypal account every night.

Edit ninja'd by @actually

Double edit: Financial breakdown of the day

$284 total today

$208 from Pastry archy and 672 alone

$37 from silent bob

and $30 from some guy I've never heard of, with an unverified/unregistered paypal account, and suspiciously said he "wont charge back later on man" after Phil looked away and started playing again, but he is a 6 month sub..

$275 of the $284 from these 4 "things" alone.

He's gonna consider this a massive success, but he's also not gonna understand why it doesn't continue after the next few days. It's because it's unsustainable. You can only draw from the well so many times. This idiot learned absolutely nothing from the vest streak ending. Should be a very "positive" tweet tonight.. Followed by "now uploading 2 chill hours to dspgaming".. Which will be followed by a night of WWE Champions (I mean taxes), and then wake up and do it all again tomorrow. What a life he leads

If he stopped taking tips, he would avoid all this alleged mess.

"1 day down, but we need to hit both tips goals on Wednesday and Thursday." But Phil, you got almost $300 today, which should cover 1 extra stream. This is even more egregious than how he rounds tips.

Blatant violation of twitch TOS

Contrary to his stage name, he is not really the King of hate,

Oh he is. He hates people won't just blindly (heh) give him money for doing absolutely nothing.