Kevin Gibes / Kathryn Gibes / TransSalamander / RageTreb / The Green Salamander - "Am hole:" The epitomized Twitter MtF you thought was just a myth! Donate to his Transformers toy fund today!

[Trigger Me Timbers]

Samefagging but Penny's old blog has a lot of him being a sadist mistress with no sex... Yes with two other troons.... so we have been in the three men in a bed lifestyle for a while now. I dont think the troon thats semi-hidden in the pics is kevkev but its really hard to tell

Spoiler: Sauce of my claim the link leads to some minor haram of troon bdsm wax play

https://steemit.com/bdsm/@steampunk-penny/mistress-penellope-talks-bdsm-episode-2-wax-play-nsfw

I think it IS kev since in the last pic Penny is wearing two keys, one for Kev and one for presumably Jen (however the troon you do see is almost certainly not Jen).

it is important to remember tho that Penny likes to bring others pain, that’s enough to get him off without intercourse. But please, trust him with donations to keep the ranch running.

Bonnie makes a friend
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Ffs Bonnie, if you try to be a woman, the least you can do is not treat them like a separate sub-caste, naming them the same way a racist would mention a persons race before anything else.
“Got a weird FB message from a local black woman... I find it super creepy”

With all the bad blood you are accumulating in town, perhaps you shouldn’t out people just trying to wish you a nice, a person of color no less!
How many black people you recon they are in there small town who would reach out to the local tranny ranch? Chances are the nice old black woman who wishes you a nice day may also see you “othering” her as a filthy cis scum who’s only place should be in the sissy re-education camps.

Also, skipping a few meals won’t kill you you fat sow. Try skipping a few more and maybe redistribute Kev Kevs elliptical for yourself. You fat man in ridiculous jeans.

 

[Lasersuit Larry]

Ffs Bonnie, if you try to be a woman, the least you can do is not treat them like a separate sub-caste, naming them the same way a racist would mention a persons race before anything else.
“Got a weird FB message from a local black woman... I find it super creepy”

With all the bad blood you are accumulating in town, perhaps you shouldn’t out people just trying to wish you a nice, a person of color no less!
How many black people you recon they are in there small town who would reach out to the local tranny ranch? Chances are the nice old black woman who wishes you a nice day may also see you “othering” her as a filthy cis scum who’s only place should be in the sissy re-education camps.

It's been said before in various forms ITT, but they have no grasp of the idea that they have moved to a very homey and tight knit rural town where everyone behaves as though everyone you meet through the day is someone you're going to be seeing again rather soon. You may even need their help for something, and the people behave like the next time they see someone they meet in their day, it could be under pretty dire circumstances.

In their minds there is no possibility that a random message from someone in the community is likely the metaphorical pie from the neighbors, welcoming them to a community that is small enough that your relationship with the people you pass by really matters. That's not why they're here; they're here to take over a corner of that town and aim gucci gats at anyone who dares approach unbidden.

 

[Dead man lurking]

Great news fam! After my last post with tag lines for the upcoming documentary on our beloved tranchers, I was contacted by a hollywood executive. We are now working on brand new possibilities for the movie poster. I really shouldn't, but thought I would leak a couple being discussed. These are all plays on existing movie posters, and if any artistic Kiwi want to help with this feel free.
Troon Driver
"On an isolated tranch, there is Kev Kev who dreams of filling his Am-Hole."

O'Kevin Where Art Thou?
"They have a Tranch but not a clue"

Catch Kev if you can
"The true story of a real fake woman"

Bonnie and Kev
"For Bonnie and Kev, every day is a cope"

 

[Lubby Smith]

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.​

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[Lasersuit Larry]

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.​

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Friendly reminder that the Tranch could have between three and five budget-but-functional AR-15s for the price of Bonnie's Sniper Wolf cosplay.

 

[In the Sick of It]

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"Hey Kevin can you come here and hold the camera for me?"

 

[Meiwaku]

Friendly reminder that the Tranch could have between three and five budget-but-functional AR-15s for the price of Bonnie's Sniper Wolf cosplay.

Metal Queer Solid V: The Amhole Pain

Starring:

Punished Kevin
Sniper Wolf-in-Sheeps-Clothing (bonnie)
Revolver tucks-a-lot (penny)

 

[Law]

These sex ghouls have the audacity to get mad at a neighbor complimenting them and telling them to have a good day?
I bet if the random compliment message was from a man, instead of an awful cis woman who reminds him of what he never will be, he wouldn't have found it creepy and would've instead talked about how everyone loves him and how random guys think he's so sexy and cool. Maybe she was trying to start up one of these queerplatonic friendships we've been hearing so much about?
Also how did Bonnie know the random complimenter was one of those dastardly cis? After all, you can't tell if someone is cis or trans from looking at them. How did he know she was even a woman? You're not supposed to be able to tell, remember?

Good thing they have that fuck-huge tacticool rifle to protect them from boomer ladies on Facebook telling them to have nice days!

 

[Meiwaku]

Oh trust me we have picked up a lot....

Until then...420 amhole it Kev!

 

[Postal Pippa]

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Oh trust me we have picked up a lot....

Until then...420 amhole it Kev!

Kev must have a crazy high tolerance to cannabis. Especially if he smokes non stop every day which Im assuming he does since he doesnt help out on the ranch and since he admits he usually is high while tweeting it kinda backs that up.

But even then that sounds par for the course, cant handle life so turns straight to cannabis that way he can dull his mind and just ignore all the stuff he doesnt want to deal with until it will eventually snowball into something he cant avoid. Id be willing to bet that he prolly smokes his room mates shit too like a fiend.

 

[Law]

The tension inside the dome full of dogs, cats, guns, diapers, toys, drugs, a possibly malfunctioning and very dirty stove, and 6 mentally unstable men has been building for months now. You know it's bad if it can pierce Kevin's coomer/consoomer brain haze and actually make it to Twitter. I bet that Ash Coyote's own special brand of trans-insanity finally caused it to erupt, like the world's stupidest volcano.
I only hope that we get the full story. If it's something really bad Bonnie and Penny might be smart enough to try and not plaster it all over Twitter.
My reckless, unfounded speculation is that Kevvie was flirting with Ash (they're both diaperfurs and Kevin kept vagueposting about wanting new friends/queerplatonic-grift-victims) and the documentary shoot devolved into horrid furry sex stuff. Which of course annoyed the other Trancheros and made them realize that it would make them look terrible.
Yelling with man voice probably ensued, and I will love if we get that in the documentary.

 

[Nothing To See Here]

>It/it's

This retard can't even spell his own pronouns correctly, jfc

 

[Boris Blank's glass eye]

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.​

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"Welcome to Tran Ranch, pardner. Now go an' lube up, boy."

As a very islamic aside: Kev wouldn't even need to dress up to participate in this new trend. In fact, he'd have to undress and flash his AM HOLE. Tranus, Parent of the Abyss.

Edit:

Kev must have a crazy high tolerance to cannabis. Especially if he smokes non stop every day which Im assuming he does since he doesnt help out on the ranch and since he admits he usually is high while tweeting it kinda backs that up.

Nice of you to assume he isn't just bullshitting.
Like with his awesome "sex life" and many "sapphic lovers".

 

[Cuscuta]

Nice of you to assume he isn't just bullshitting.
Like with his awesome "sex life" and many "sapphic lovers".

I don't feel like he's bullshitting on this. They're in Colorado, weed is legal, and wasting loads of money on drugs and drowning out all sorrows and conflict by being constantly high is right in line with Kevin's irresponsible behavior.

 

[Mealy Mouth Spittle]

I don't feel like he's bullshitting on this. They're in Colorado, weed is legal, and wasting loads of money on drugs and drowning out all sorrows and conflict by being constantly high is right in line with Kevin's irresponsible behavior.

Drugs, social media, and snack foods are the only things keeping Kev from joining the 41%. Take away those things and he wouldn't last 48 hours.

 

[Cuscuta]

Drugs, social media, and snack foods are the only things keeping Kev from joining the 41%. Take away those things and he wouldn't last 48 hours.

Don't forget the piles and piles of plastic childrens toys.

 

[Law]

Also passing around a crusty bong and being high every day is what immature men do when they have a share house together, along with endless frozen pizza and video games. A bit of a stereotype sure, but it is really funny to me how the Tranch is basically a frat house. Really not what you'd expect from a bunch of lesbian farmers in their 30s.
I bet they use empty liquor bottles as "decoration" and wear shoes in the house.

 

[Spunt]

Wild speculation, but:

1 - We know the tranch has problems with its power supply - overloaded, inadequate generator, defective solar panels, lack of maintenance.
2 - Alpacashwitz recently gained heating lamps after the shitstorm over the conditions the animals were in, prompted by Bonnie's accidental disclosure of the animals' poor condition.
3 - As in *electric* heating lamps, not gas or oil burners. My guess is Bonnie installed them as he seems slightly more competent than the others and actually wants to run an alpaca ranch rather than Ram Ranch.
4 - The power drain from those heating lamps must be immense (even a basic consumer fan heater can use up as much as 2kW, their generator manages 4kW total).
5 - Kevin's triple-monitored gaming rig probably eats between 700W and 1kW on its own, let alone whatever other electronics he has.
6 - The Tranch therefore had to choose between keeping the animals alive and Kevin's Overwatch sessions.
7 - Given that I doubt Kevin would willingly give up his 24/7 leisure time, this probably made Bonnie blow a fuse and tell Penny exactly what he thinks of Kevin, possibly while brandishing a gun. The generator may well have blown a fuse too, come to think of it.
8 - Troonageddon.

Thoughts?

Edit: Had a poke around. This site sells agricultural heating lamps. It looks like the power use is 175w-250w per bulb. Bear in mind that the usual use of these lamps is to heat incubating eggs, chicks, ducklings etc, and you would rarely need more than a couple for that unless you were a massive battery farm. To heat a draughty shed full of alpacas you'd need a LOT of them, so 2kW for the whole setup doesn't sound unrealistic. Disclaimer: I am not a farmer.

 

[ranine]

Autism speaks
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I'm not flirting, but I am, but it doesn't mean anything and I don't understand what flirting is
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This is what happens when you live your life entirely online
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Is there another explanation beyond autism that explains why troons are so bad at basic human interaction? How do they not understand the concept of friendship?

Bonnie makes a friend
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tbh Bonnie's discomfort with this is understandable, as it's considered pretty weird to compliment someone online out of the blue as compared to IRL etiquette.

 

[Cuscuta]

tbh Bonnie's discomfort with this is understandable, as it's considered pretty weird to compliment someone online out of the blue as compared to IRL etiquette.

It just sounds like something a clueless boomer on Facebook would do. They have no sense of online vs IRL etiquette as being different things. No malice or creepiness involved.