Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Things Better Forgotten]

Feel free to rate me late but with all the talk of Bob visiting NYC, there is only one way his trip can go:

 

[TerminalTryHard]

Does Bob consider himself Generation X because he thinks it sounds cool...or that it gives him some sort of authority or legitimacy? He's too young to be Gen X, he's an older Millennial or an Xennial (just like me!) Bob seems like he'd think he's above being a lowly Millennial, he's weird like that.

Bob wouldn't be Bob if it wasn't for his utterly unexplainable sense of superiority.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

View attachment 1967733

"Mister Scotch Bottle, you are my only friend."

 

[Wünderkind]

an interesting stance considering his tendancy to shit over 1st person shooter fans

i was a big fan of cod at the point he released this and couldn't believe the idiotic stereotyping he does of fans of a harmless game genre he does at the end here (and throughout, just look at the title)... probably the first time i became aware what a cow bob is

e: also after another watch, doesn't the huge popularity of gears of war which was basically synonymous with xbox dudebros at one point and is THIRD PERSON completely make moot the idiot's rant?

 

[Lasersuit Larry]

They woke up a Balrog.

Ok but did the dwarves wake up a Balrog, or did Celeborn just miss a spot while he was rocking out with his immortal cock out during the First Age?

 

[Oliver Onions]

I didn't know what Wandavision was, so I googled it. Surprise surprise, more capeshit.

But why does Bob obsess over Wandavision even more than other Marvel media? He jumped on the Black Panther bandwagon, but that was for asspats.

The MCU is generally regarded as being competent but extremely generic as far as plots go, so Wandavision (from what I'm told; not watching it) doing a bunch of weird 4th-wall shit is the proof Bobby needs to show all the haters Marvel capeshit is in fact super cerebral, high-concept art.

Basically, imagine the RLM clip of Mike screaming 'IT BROKE NEW GROUND' except not ironic.

He wants to fuck Elizabeth Olsen.

Or this. It could just be this.

 

[Koby_Fish]

View attachment 1968006
If you laugh at people who find happiness in Sky Daddy, you are a Thinker.

View attachment 1968005
Yet if you laugh at people who find happiness in some maudlin "deep" line on TV, you are an asshole.

If Bob believes in the existence of The Patriarchy, he is a Believer. They believe there exists a magic cock-and-balls in the sky.

 

[SITHRAK!]

If Bob believes in the existence of The Patriarchy, he is a Believer. They believe there exists a magic cock-and-balls in the sky.

Ah yes, the Patriarchy. When you’re too cool for religion but you still desperately need an invisible, intangible, unprovable, all-powerful force that controls your destiny. Especially when you’re in your 30’s, still live at home, and nobody’s hiring queer black intersectionality studies PhD’s, so you’re forced to work at Starbucks.

 

[Mola Ram]

i was a big fan of cod at the point he released this and couldn't believe the idiotic stereotyping he does of fans of a harmless game genre he does at the end here (and throughout, just look at the title)... probably the first time i became aware what a cow bob is

e: also after another watch, doesn't the huge popularity of gears of war which was basically synonymous with xbox dudebros at one point and is THIRD PERSON completely make moot the idiot's rant?

I know Bob's ignorance of the medium he professes to love is an old story here, but it's kind of hilarious that this entire tendentious, mean-spirited argument falls apart the moment you realize he doesn't include first-person open world games in his analysis. This looks like it was a year or two before Skyrim, so we can cut him some slack, but it certainly came after Morrowind proved there was a console market for immersive RPGs, and after Fallout 3 rescued a dead niche franchise and catapulted it to massive success. Bob's blind spots are so big he doesn't even know they exist -- unless he's being deliberately dishonest, which can't be discounted.

 

[The tired cat]

I know Bob's ignorance of the medium he professes to love is an old story here, but it's kind of hilarious that this entire tendentious, mean-spirited argument falls apart the moment you realize he doesn't include first-person open world games in his analysis. This looks like it was a year or two before Skyrim, so we can cut him some slack, but it certainly came after Morrowind proved there was a console market for immersive RPGs, and after Fallout 3 rescued a dead niche franchise and catapulted it to massive success. Bob's blind spots are so big he doesn't even know they exist -- unless he's being deliberately dishonest, which can't be discounted.

Lets not forget that fatboy also made a video how "PC gaming is dead guyz, muh consoles have won"

 

[Lasersuit Larry]

Lets not forget that fatboy also made a video how "PC gaming is dead guyz, muh consoles have won"

Doubly hilarious in that the only console company that it could be argued is beating PC at anything at all in the context of the last year is Nintendo.

This probably makes Blob happy because he's a moron, but it shouldn't.

Nintendo Switch is killing it because it's not a console, it's a mobile, and proves that the idea of a big powerful and expensive home console can go ahead and die, most people won't care. We all have PCs anyways, and we're much more interested in playing those games on the go with fuzzier graphics and a shorter draw distance than we are in buying overpriced name brand home machines that have middling performance compared to PCs when they hit the market.

Add the fact that Nintendo is the only big three company that is actively rejecting woke media politics. They release all the Japanese boobie RPGs and mildly, harmlessly edgy games uncensored, they tell cancel mobs to fuck off in wholesome and fan-friendly ways, they affirm their dedication to making fun products that put smiles on faces above all practically every week. They're a bastion of everything Blob wants to burn out of world culture.

Except for his favorite plumber, whose quest to save some pussy from a fire breathing tortoise shaped his views on women. Can't get rid of that, no sir. How often does Bob simp for Anita Sarkeesian, happily blind to the fact that she's singing her songs about him specifically?

 

[EnemyStand]

Doubly hilarious in that the only console company that it could be argued is beating PC at anything at all in the context of the last year is Nintendo.

This probably makes Blob happy because he's a moron, but it shouldn't.

Nintendo Switch is killing it because it's not a console, it's a mobile, and proves that the idea of a big powerful and expensive home console can go ahead and die, most people won't care. We all have PCs anyways, and we're much more interested in playing those games on the go with fuzzier graphics and a shorter draw distance than we are in buying overpriced name brand home machines that have middling performance compared to PCs when they hit the market.

Add the fact that Nintendo is the only big three company that is actively rejecting woke media politics. They release all the Japanese boobie RPGs and mildly, harmlessly edgy games uncensored, they tell cancel mobs to fuck off in wholesome and fan-friendly ways, they affirm their dedication to making fun products that put smiles on faces above all practically every week. They're a bastion of everything Blob wants to burn out of world culture.

Except for his favorite plumber, whose quest to save some pussy from a fire breathing tortoise shaped his views on women. Can't get rid of that, no sir.

It doesn't help that the scalpers ignored the Switch for the most part. If From ever stops making the Demon Souls remake and Bloodborne PS only PC will take over home consoles for good and the humble Switch will have won New Vietnam once and for all.

 

[Judge Dredd]

Does Bob consider himself Generation X because he thinks it sounds cool...or that it gives him some sort of authority or legitimacy? He's too young to be Gen X, he's an older Millennial or an Xennial (just like me!) Bob seems like he'd think he's above being a lowly Millennial, he's weird like that.

I'm a few years younger than Bob, and it's only the last few years I've been considered "millennial". Before then I was considered Gen X.

I think for the people who buy into generational rivalry, Gen X is good, millennial is bad, and so I'm put into whatever is convenient for the argument.

Bob is likely in a similar position. His consumerist bugman personality and politics makes him a walking wheezing millennial stereotype, so people want him to be that. But he's also a Gen X stereotype when talking about growing up with NES, SNES, and N64, his obsession with 80s cartoons like Transformers, and his nostalgia for them.

 

[Wünderkind]

I know Bob's ignorance of the medium he professes to love is an old story here, but it's kind of hilarious that this entire tendentious, mean-spirited argument falls apart the moment you realize he doesn't include first-person open world games in his analysis. This looks like it was a year or two before Skyrim, so we can cut him some slack, but it certainly came after Morrowind proved there was a console market for immersive RPGs, and after Fallout 3 rescued a dead niche franchise and catapulted it to massive success. Bob's blind spots are so big he doesn't even know they exist -- unless he's being deliberately dishonest, which can't be discounted.

morrowind and daggerfall were both very popular FP rpgs along with king's field in japan, and even in the 90s there were g-rated FPS games on the market such as chex quest and descent:



not a single drop of blood to be seen in these games, and with fortnite you could argue this kid-friendly subgenre has returned (though not for the better).

i'm even going to be fair to bob and agree that the cod/generic shooters sequel industry is tedious to the point of bleak along with the corporatizing and dumbing down of games in general, but hilariously enough he misses the endless factory-made, focus-tested MCU which is more rote and predictable even than COD #69.

 

[Smithfield Ham]

Someone send his FPS video to Civvie 11 or some other FPS-tuber and see if it'll make 'em explode in rage.

 

[Mr Snek]

morrowind and daggerfall were both very popular FP rpgs along with king's field in japan, and even in the 90s there were g-rated FPS games on the market such as chex quest and descent:

View attachment 1968390View attachment 1968391

not a single drop of blood to be seen in these games, and with fortnite you could argue this kid-friendly subgenre has returned (though not for the better).

i'm even going to be fair to bob and agree that the cod/generic shooters sequel industry is tedious to the point of bleak along with the corporatizing and dumbing down of games in general, but hilariously enough he misses the endless factory-made, focus-tested MCU which is more rote and predictable even than COD #69.

Bob isn't mad about FPS games because of them being low quality, cheap cash grabs. He's mad about them because he blames them for Mario no longer being king of the video game industry and opening up video games to a more mainstream, dude bro audience. I'm very surprised that to my knowledge, Bob has never gone on a rant about how DOOM is single handedly responsible for ruining video games.

 

[Smithfield Ham]

Bob being molested as a child would explain so much.

Someone reacted to this post as "optimistic" and I'm actually a little terrified that someone thinks child molestation is optimistic somehow.

Is... is Bob just that so awful that being a rape victim would be better than what he is now? That's really fucked up

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

Lets not forget that fatboy also made a video how "PC gaming is dead guyz, muh consoles have won"

I loved that one Game Overthinker video he did which was just him bitching and moaning that the Wii U was a failure and not selling well.

 

[Mola Ram]

Someone reacted to this post as "optimistic" and I'm actually a little terrified that someone thinks child molestation is optimistic somehow.

Is... is Bob just that so awful that being a rape victim would be better than what he is now? That's really fucked up

If Bob had been molested, at least he'd have an understandable excuse for being the hateful lump of shit he is.

I do think there was some species of bad parenting going on in the Chipman household, though we'll probably never know exactly what it was or how bad it was. Given Chris's loving selfies with bottles of scotch and Bob's Great Beeramid I assume alcohol was involved.

 

[Quixotic Man]

I know Bob's ignorance of the medium he professes to love is an old story here, but it's kind of hilarious that this entire tendentious, mean-spirited argument falls apart the moment you realize he doesn't include first-person open world games in his analysis. This looks like it was a year or two before Skyrim, so we can cut him some slack, but it certainly came after Morrowind proved there was a console market for immersive RPGs, and after Fallout 3 rescued a dead niche franchise and catapulted it to massive success. Bob's blind spots are so big he doesn't even know they exist -- unless he's being deliberately dishonest, which can't be discounted.

Bob briefly mentions Myst and Shadowgate in that video, but brushes them off as being largely non interactive adventure games. He seems to be completely oblivious to dungeon crawlers like Ultima, that had you scouring dungeon and fighting stick figure goblins in first person since before Mario stomped his first Goomba. Or that a lot of people play racing and piloting games in cockpit view.

But ignoring that, Bob reveals how bad his argument is when he says "Portal and Half Life aren't enough to excuse the wave of samey military shooters" is like saying "Mario and Donkey Kong aren't enough to excuse the wave of samey mascot platformers." Its stupid and dismissive of the actually imaginative games in the genre. But Bob hates Metroid Prime for being in first person, so his opinion on the matter deserves to go directly in to the trash.