Diseased Neo-Pagans / Witches on the Internet / Witchblr - SMT IRL, but with fatties

[Marshal Mannerheim]

Yes but I never said anything about the Lord's supper, I was previously talking about the Last Supper. "Fulfillment of the Law" and all that.

Apologies, I misread your post.

 

[Red Mask]

If free bleeding is a symbol of female empowerment, I wonder what that makes shitting on the street.

Viral video worthy.

 

[fuzzyrodent85]

Spoiler

This queen should look into whitening toothpaste.


I wonder if this person has actually ever had sex or if their only experience with it is reading about it on ao3.


I too, would be hostile if I found out that my child's friend was having astral sex with Apollo while running cupcake frosting on her naked body as an offering.


If you didn't know, shufflemancy is literally just shuffling a playlist on spotify. That's the service you're paying for.


Marry me, modernwitchtips.


What would happen if you did that?


No thanks.


Washington should go to the doctor, not twitter.


That's great! I use ham/ster pronouns.



Just get some birth control or a vasectomy.


It's $7.75 for one tiny jar. If you're paying that plus shipping just to attract somebody that's pathetic.

 

[Agarathium1066]

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Wonder how hard she'd be pressing charges if she found out her boyfriend gave her some extra special alfredo.

Probably don't want to be using a song from a villain that was a huckster and ineffectual opponent that relied wholly on demons either, seeing as the moment he failed the demons drug him screaming into hell to suffer. I agree Facilier was incredibly well acted at least but maybe learn a lesson or two from the tale.

 

[NoReturn]

I wonder if this person has actually ever had sex or if their only experience with it is reading about it on ao3.

My bet is that second one.

If you didn't know, shufflemancy is literally just shuffling a playlist on spotify. That's the service you're paying for.

Ok, so I went to YouTube and I went into one of my playlists and hit shuffle. This is what I got:

Spoiler

What does it mean?!

What would happen if you did that?

In other news, today I mistyped a url when I wanted to check in on Angie and I found her knockoff-version.

Meet andiethewitch

Spoiler: TikToks

And in MayorTomatillo news:

Spoiler: full thread

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

I'm sure ”nice, normal Apollo devotees” sacrificed animals in Ancient Greece.

> fae/faer
> Celtic pagan

The joke writes itself.

 

[RazorBackBacon]

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I too, would be hostile if I found out that my child's friend was having astral sex with Apollo while running cupcake frosting on her naked body as an offering.

Pretty sure that sort of thing counts as at least "Desperate cry for attention," if not "Sexual abuse warning sign."

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I would rather visit a hooker. I'm sure if I pay extra she'll pretend to tell my future before we fuck.

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These bitches are so excited to get you to eat their period blood I'm pretty sure it counts as a fetish. Like those fuckwads who nut on unsuspecting women in public.

What does it mean?!

It means shit's about to get real gay up in here.

 

[EnemyStand]

And in MayorTomatillo news:
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Spoiler: full thread

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Manifestations, or as I like to call them, Faustian Bargains. Because putting energy out into the world for gibs always works out and never costs a thing. Keep putting pieces of yourself out there for personal gain, I'm sure there's absolutely nothing that will be attracted by it. Do any of you fine folks here notice a theme? All things that they got will likely drive them further into witchcraft, especially the men they asked for.

 

[RazorBackBacon]

Manifestations, or as I like to call them, Faustian Bargains. Because putting energy out into the world for gibs always works out and never costs a thing. Keep putting pieces of yourself out there for personal gain, I'm sure there's absolutely nothing that will be attracted by it. Do any of you fine folks here notice a theme? All things that they got will likely drive them further into witchcraft, especially the men they asked for.

I really do like the mental exercise of presuming that witchcraft is real by their own definition, because it highlights how absolutely selfish these women are, even by their own moral system.

Every occultic text I ever read says to be very careful with love magick. Because, and you can call this l karma or the Rule of Three or God's Wrath, whatever you put in to a ritual you tend to get back. If you look at someone with lust in your eyes and try to attract him with "love" magick, it might work. But it's fruit from the poisonous tree. You weren't working with love, you were working with *lust*. And lust is a far more mercurial and dangerous beast than love. The Universe won't discriminate or try to blunt the effect; It's just working with what you gave it. That's why you'd be better served by trying to send out general good vibes of love and companionship and letting things work themselves out.

This is before we even talk about the idea of demons or other malicious entities hijacking your "love" spell for their own nefarious ends. There's a reason why sex and death magick is considered 'black' and it's not because a bunch of old fogeys sitting in a church somewhere. Using sex magick is the occult equivalent of handling a loaded firearm. And these bitches are just cavalierly waving it around with no trigger discipline.

 

[NoReturn]

I really do like the mental exercise of presuming that witchcraft is real by their own definition, because it highlights how absolutely selfish these women are, even by their own moral system.

"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it."
- Not actually Aristotle

I'm right there with you and @EnemyStand. Part of the reason why I like this thread so much is that it isn't real, but it presents an opportunity to engage in cow behaviors while safe in the knowledge that the cupcake-fucker isn't having unprotected sugar-sex with another human being. Unlike the other subjects on this site where people really are affecting others quite directly with their dumbassery, it's easy to look at just the ideas and philosophies of internet witchcraft on their own merit.
On that note:
Regarding the matter of their "love", they're treating these men like build-a-bears. Let's pretend they made a mood board of exactly the man they wanted, and they got that man, down to the letter. Then what? What if your tastes change? What if that man has his own life and goals that are separate from your own? It's pretty obvious none of these women sat down and did the actual work of sitting down and thinking through what they were asking for. All they did was make a list and try to "manifest" it.
It's not even that hard, they just either:

1. Never learned it was a necessary step of the spiritual practice with which which they are interacting.​

2. Did learn about it, but don't understand it or don't care; and are treating their magical practice with the same consumerist mindset as the rest of their lives.​

or

3. Know good goddamn well this all isn't real, but want to keep larping because it gives them a community and makes them feel less alone.​

Speaking of feeling less alone.
Happy Spring Solstice (In the Northern Hemisphere)!

Time to strip naked and go to the beach!

I'm sure Brigid is thrilled.

No! You strip naked and go play at the beach! It's very clear.
How many of these people "celebrating Ostara" do you think also post in /r/childfree?

Spoiler

Hellova fupa on that fairy. I'm pretty sure I've seen her in the Fat Girlcows thread.

Again I ask: How do these people live the rest of their lives?
"Sorry professor, I know it's a week late, but here's my essay. I just didn't feel like it last week and kept pushing it back. I still get full credit, right?"
"Oh sure! See what matters is your intention behind the essay."

Bonus:

Spoiler: NoReturn's magical tips!

• For real, today's the first day of spring, but next Saturday is the actual full moon.
• If you've have more than three days in a row above 50°F/10°C you should be good to start fucking around in your gardens outside without killing the bugs and eggs who are nesting in dead leaves from winter.
• If you're germinating seeds this spring, you can start some indoors right now if you want.

 

[Caesar Augustus]

The Road Goes Ever On? Are they aware Tolkien was a Catholic Monarchist?
Edit: Not to mention just how un-feminist Greco-Roman Paganism was.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

I'm sure Brigid is thrilled.

Given that St Brigid took part in the Christianisation of Ireland, I'm sure she is.

Are they aware

No.

 

[Kyria the Great]

I have to ask which is more cringe in people's opinion? The left-wing Neo-Pagans who simply reject the religion(s) of the culture because they feel they must tear down every pillar of society or some shit like that? OR, the right-wing Neo-Pagans because they believe that the current religion is weak and we must embrace "The Old Ways" to drive out and kill whatever foreigners we don't like.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

I have to ask which is more cringe in people's opinion? The left-wing Neo-Pagans who simply reject the religion(s) of the culture because they feel they must tear down every pillar of society or some shit like that? OR, the right-wing Neo-Pagans because they believe that the current religion is weak and we must embrace "The Old Ways" to drive out and kill whatever foreigners we don't like.

¿Por qué no los dos?

 

[fuzzyrodent85]

I have to ask which is more cringe in people's opinion? The left-wing Neo-Pagans who simply reject the religion(s) of the culture because they feel they must tear down every pillar of society or some shit like that? OR, the right-wing Neo-Pagans because they believe that the current religion is weak and we must embrace "The Old Ways" to drive out and kill whatever foreigners we don't like.

That's a good question. Imagine you have a choice between dating someone who sneaks period blood into your spaghetti sauce or someone who invades the white house shirtless wearing a raccoon hat. It really goes down to personal preference.

 

[Caesar Augustus]

I have to ask which is more cringe in people's opinion? The left-wing Neo-Pagans who simply reject the religion(s) of the culture because they feel they must tear down every pillar of society or some shit like that? OR, the right-wing Neo-Pagans because they believe that the current religion is weak and we must embrace "The Old Ways" to drive out and kill whatever foreigners we don't like.

Honestly, the fact people use the opposite ideals to justify this only makes both sides more hilarious.

 

[Flexo]

That's a good question. Imagine you have a choice between dating someone who sneaks period blood into your spaghetti sauce or someone who invades the white house shirtless wearing a raccoon hat. It really goes down to personal preference.

The racoon hat is at least more entertaining.

 

[RazorBackBacon]

That's a good question. Imagine you have a choice between dating someone who sneaks period blood into your spaghetti sauce or someone who invades the white house shirtless wearing a raccoon hat. It really goes down to personal preference.

I'd go with Option 2, because at least then at worst I get an uncomfortable chat with the feds and another Crazy Ex story to tell my friends and co-workers. Going with Option 1 gets me a mouthful of uterine lining and spaghetti sauce-related PTSD.

 

[EnemyStand]

"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it."
- Not actually Aristotle

I'm right there with you and @EnemyStand. Part of the reason why I like this thread so much is that it isn't real, but it presents an opportunity to engage in cow behaviors while safe in the knowledge that the cupcake-fucker isn't having unprotected sugar-sex with another human being. Unlike the other subjects on this site where people really are affecting others quite directly with their dumbassery, it's easy to look at just the ideas and philosophies of internet witchcraft on their own merit.

I'm more of a Mulder than a Scully when it comes to the supernatural, to be honest. I just keep my sperging to appropriate time and place (like this thread) or failing that, a minimum. I know how I come off to normies when I start talking about magic and demons and shit. There's a lot that's bullshit, but there's a lot that I believe is not. Fucking gods in the astral is complete bullshit though. More likely it's something (likely a demon) taking a desirable form for some purpose. Most likely to pull the soul farther from redemption but let's just say there's multiple theories.

Regarding the matter of their "love", they're treating these men like build-a-bears. Let's pretend they made a mood board of exactly the man they wanted, and they got that man, down to the letter. Then what? What if your tastes change? What if that man has his own life and goals that are separate from your own? It's pretty obvious none of these women sat down and did the actual work of sitting down and thinking through what they were asking for. All they did was make a list and try to "manifest" it.
It's not even that hard, they just either:

1. Never learned it was a necessary step of the spiritual practice with which which they are interacting.​

2. Did learn about it, but don't understand it or don't care; and are treating their magical practice with the same consumerist mindset as the rest of their lives.​

or

3. Know good goddamn well this all isn't real, but want to keep larping because it gives them a community and makes them feel less alone.​

It's the old line of "Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it." I'm with @RazorBackBacon with thinking it's Option 2. Occultism is shockingly precise, so these rituals they're performing are half-assed at best. If they are working in the case of option 1 or 2, something out there is "filling in the blanks" so to speak, and that's not a good thing at all. And even if they are LARPing, it hardly makes a difference. They're still engaging in the practice, and the supernatural likely doesn't care if they think they're LARPing. I know God doesn't.

 

[Flexo]

I'm more of a Mulder than a Scully when it comes to the supernatural, to be honest. I just keep my sperging to appropriate time and place (like this thread) or failing that, a minimum. I know how I come off to normies when I start talking about magic and demons and shit. There's a lot that's bullshit, but there's a lot that I believe is not. Fucking gods in the astral is complete bullshit though. More likely it's something (likely a demon) taking a desirable form for some purpose. Most likely to pull the soul farther from redemption but let's just say there's multiple theories.

Ironically, in the X-Files they were reversed. Mulder believed in everything except the supernatural, believing it to be some form of scifi while Scully was the Catholic who doubted almost everything except religious & supernatural things.

So actually you are more Scully than Mulder. XD