DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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How do you summon the DSP?

Everytime something or someone is down, he appears to kick it.

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Just dropped in for a hot vaccine take.

Phil is beyond lazy and is being a little whiny shit who thinks he deserves the me first treatment like most of the lazy cunts out there in this country.

I am going to powerlevel a bit here. I work 50-60 hours a week outdoors in a trade this shit isn't easy yet I was able to get my appointment in about a day since they opened vaccines up to everyone out here in California. I thought this shit hole of a State would drop the ball but nope it was easy as scroll the page down to my second opinion for vaccine location. (The first one was full). At that point I realized that The King of Suffering couldn't even put in that much effort. Kat is going to have to book it for him while he rants about it up stairs.

Enjoy the rants today, and Phil I hope it hurts when you read this. Knowing that even with my -77IQ I was able to get an appointment before, enjoy your day begging cunt. Time for my water break.
 
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PieceofShet said:
How do you summon the DSP?

Everytime something or someone is down, he appears to kick it.

View attachment 2092732
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Yep. Something, somewhere failed, here comes DSP to gravedance and cloutfarm. Wow DSP you're a galaxy brained businessman, they should put you in charge of Nintendo of America when you leave streaming (of your own volition of course) to execute the 10 year plan. Fat retard.
 
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Surly Muppet said:
There was a weird line in his spiel about getting a vaccine earlier today (I was just listening to an1337's video).
Phil says, "Patience is key. And what I have to keep in mind is that we're not at high, high risk. You know my wife is - has a moderate degree of risk having interactions with (human) people every day at a store..." Phil also vaguely mentions Kat having had possible exposure at one point.

First of all, I'm pretty sure he started to say 'human' in there before he said people. More alien speak.

But it's that 'what I have to keep in mind' part. That sounds distinctly like Phil reminding himself of something someone told him - meaning either Kat or his parents told him this. I think there may have been a contact case wherever Kat is working right now and Phil got severely spooked and went batshit crazy. This would account for his sudden swing from before, when he was saying he was a low priority for the vaccine, to his sudden panic and desire for a vaccine as fast as possible. Someone had to talk him off a ledge, and they had to remind him that even Kat is only at moderate risk so he is still a lower priority than many, and to just stay calm and wait and his time would come. Phil repeats this to himself after he starts getting really wound up during the prestream.

TL;DR: Phil probably lost his shit over COVID and Mommy Burnell had to talk him out of a tizzy. I'm sure she wished she could give him a pill and leave him there.

I know others touched on this, but he's riding the penne wagers into the ground. I don't even know how that could be something that he gets this rigid about. He found something that people liked, and in typical Phil fashion, locked it into an autistic pattern. Just like we needed more vests, and then needed to police the vests that people could vote for, now there is only two variations of penne wagers that Phil has deemed optimal for CoD. He sucks the fun out of everything with his out of control obsession with routine and control.
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You know, what would be great if he actually caught it and made a full recovery. We might see phil do something like make a video will on twitch, only for him to look retarded since he has no real assets and just debt.
 
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fuckshitsnake said:
I want to live in the alternate timeline where Phil thought himself a professional baseball player instead of a streamer leech.

Imagine sitting down in the bleachers for your 7-year-old's tee-ball game and you see this 40-going-on-70-year-old man hobbling up to the plate with this smug look on his bloated pale face who then proceeds to still fuck up at hitting the ball. :story:
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Phil would be that middle school gym teacher who’d get his rocks off by demeaning small children. But eventually one of them would call him dumb and he’d hobble off to his awfice and call their parents.
 
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Keeping himself locked up and away from society 95% of the time does not help Phil. He is still a lazy sloth but I wouldn’t be shocked if any sort of social interaction with anyone but his two moms makes him tense up which leads to him half assing the vaccine process. Can’t drive anywhere alone, can’t go to the store alone, can’t schedule appointments on his own, and can’t even pick up shit on his own. You would almost expect that from someone who’s 20 years younger than Phil but this guy is 39 and can’t do fuck all.
 
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PhilsCamelToe said:
Keeping himself locked up and away from society 95% of the time does not help Phil. He is still a lazy sloth but I wouldn’t be shocked if any sort of social interaction with anyone but his two moms makes him tense up which leads to him half assing the vaccine process. Can’t drive anywhere alone, can’t go to the store alone, can’t schedule appointments on his own, and can’t even pick up shit on his own. You would almost expect that from someone who’s 20 years younger than Phil but this guy is 39 and can’t do fuck all.
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I wonder if the nurses will be able to find a vein. Imagine if some nurse shit talks phil in broken english...
>oh my, why you have no muscle, you supposed to be man
 
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gettingthatgrooveback said:
Did Phil mention that he got paid by Twitch yesterday? Because he surely mentioned on the 14th that he didn't get paid.
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LOL HELL NO he's not about to bring up that he got a couple grand yesterday. All that money is memory holed/ gotcha pulled already and bringing it up would go against the "I need money to pay my bills" and that ever elusive tax man/back taxes scam.
 
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gettingthatgrooveback said:
Did Phil mention that he got paid by Twitch yesterday? Because he surely mentioned on the 14th that he didn't get paid.
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DSP not having been paid yet = public information the whole world needs to be constantly reminded about.

DSP having been paid = behind-the-scenes private information that only trolls care about.
 
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PutridElephant said:
Says the $6000+ he's saving a month from the bankruptcy is going to pay for the bills he didn't get discharged.

Bankruptcy was closed in July 2020. 9 months * 6000 = $54000
That could easily pay off his back taxes or his car.
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Also convenient how he said, "eventually in about 10 years". I guess he is planning on extending his begging until he is 50. I imagine if he is still getting whale's in his 50's he will just say "eventually in x years" and act like he's going to change.
 
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PutridElephant said:
Says the $6000+ he's saving a month from the bankruptcy is going to pay for the bills he didn't get discharged.

Bankruptcy was closed in July 2020. 9 months * 6000 = $54000
That could easily pay off his back taxes or his car.
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The Wordsmith of the West thinks he's being coy. 'Billz' = more wwe champions.
There is no 'another 10 years'.
 
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