Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

  • 🔧 At about Midnight EST I am going to completely fuck up the site trying to fix something.

How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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Incoherent rant to the bro who disses the casting of The Eternals.
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I guess we can add "performatively racist" to the big list of Bob's desperate attempts at twitter owns that only make sense to him. He obviously wants to turn back performative woke on the other team, but it doesn't even begin to make sense. So people who aren't actually racist want to be seen as racist? If only I were a superior thinkbrain like Bob, maybe I could understand.
 
How did Cinema Roberto even find this tweet from this account? It's some random dude who tweets almost entirely in Spanish. Was he name searching both Robert and Eternals?

Spanish Robert agrees:
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And just because it seems to upset Film Robert, here's a version of the Eternals shot with the desaturation cut in half:
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Man, even Hitler seems more chilled than Bob.
Hitler got laid and had a dog to distract him from shit. Bob doesn't have those outlets.
The first image that comes to mind when I hear Chris say' "headspace" is an empty room because it's obvious that he doesn't have a lot going on upstairs.

As for Bob salivating over Eternals, he truly is getting excited over nothing isn't he? As much as I loathe to admit it, Nash is 100% right in saying that Marvel is not selling the film at all. Bob is too much of a knuckle-dragging consoomer to realize that it was tedious and mundane.
I don't get the selling point (let alone the point at all) of this film. I can remember being excited when Thor, Captain America, and even Ant-Man and the Guardians came around because it felt like they were building it all up for something even if I didn't know that much about the characters. This...not so much.

What does Marvel even have going anymore? This "Phase 4" shit just seems like a) a dumping ground for random properties to see if they stick and b) an attempt to force as much Woke crap as possible down the throats of people like Bob. They don't have a plan to work up to another big end point. It's as clear as day. This crap that Bob salivates over is the very problem that is going to kill the MCU soon enough. But he'll dutifully follow it along as it refuses to adapt or change and eventually dries up the only cow on the dairy farm.
My God, it's literally called "For the Greater Glory of Science". I liked the apocalyptic evangelicals more when they kept to street corner preaching.

Also: About half of all baby deaths at the time (at least as I recall, if I'm wrong someone smack me) happened within the first couple weeks of life. You don't generally vaccinate newborns, you bloody Science-worshipping dolts. Even today your priesthood at the vaccine-friendly CDC doesn't push for anything but Hepatitis B before the end of the first month.
Chris is like many people on Facebook who think spamming something someone else made is an end all be all argument. He's of an even worse variety that will slobber all over any page with "Science" in the title as if it's some unquestionable source of eternal truth. Here's some truth, Wart: posting that shit doesn't mean you know a thing about what you're talk about. Anyone here with a science background or a great interest in the field would figuratively pimp smack your inebriated ass upmand down the block. Here's another harsh truth: science isn't some eternal, faultless wellspring of truth. Times come around when it's wielded like men like Lysenko, Fauci, and Ishii with catastrophic results.
 
HA! I so fucking called it that he was gonna be pissed off PPG getting reshoots/refilming. Also, hyped? Fat ass you're the only one who was hyped for this trash, and mostly because you hope they introduce Dexter as a sexy nerd, so your worthless ass can project onto him,
 
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It took a constitutional amendment to give DC electoral college participation. They know that there is no way that they can successfully amend the constitution to give statehood to DC so they will pretend that they don't have to.
They are basically the equivalent of those shady "experts" that defense attorneys hire to say stupid shit in hopes it will confuse the jury.
 
A Chinese director is not a selling point.

Especially not to China..... when said director smack-talks the CCP.

The massive tokenism paint they've been backed into a corner using is showing fully with their lukewarm treatment/promotion of the film. They know it's going to bomb and they know they'll never get into the China market with it to soften the crash. But there's nothing they can do, any withdrawal strategy treads on sacred progressive ground by somehow, however obliquely, hurting women/Asians/minorities.

Can't change directors, cancel the film, do extensive retools/recasting, all will be spun as the MCU falling to the whims of white supremacy, spearheaded by online Megasimps like Bob determined to keep the films free of the taint of heresy with all the fanaticism of a 40K Space Marine.

They're turning off the only tap they can touch without getting an SJW-approved shock .... the advertising budget, since even one round of "look look! Moar Capeshit!" web trailers is enough to satisfy the gatekeepers.

And I'm not sad at all... you spend years telling us how bandaids are problematic and tokens of white supremacy? Well, have fun bleeding to death because you can't staunch your own wounds without the outrage mob inflicting some more.
 
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Support my Patreon, but whether I deliver my promise or not depends on the "headspace" I'm in.
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I checked, the beer photo was two hours before the headspace tweet. Just makes it look like "I couldn't get drunk enough to put up with this shit."
"Human skin on my eyes."

Eyelids, Chris. They're called eyelids.

(Also, accusing "some" Christians of using human body parts in their rituals? Do you know what "blood libel" is?)
 
I don't get the selling point (let alone the point at all) of this film. I can remember being excited when Thor, Captain America, and even Ant-Man and the Guardians came around because it felt like they were building it all up for something even if I didn't know that much about the characters. This...not so much.

What does Marvel even have going anymore? This "Phase 4" shit just seems like a) a dumping ground for random properties to see if they stick and b) an attempt to force as much Woke crap as possible down the throats of people like Bob. They don't have a plan to work up to another big end point. It's as clear as day. This crap that Bob salivates over is the very problem that is going to kill the MCU soon enough. But he'll dutifully follow it along as it refuses to adapt or change and eventually dries up the only cow on the dairy farm.
That's another aspect to this that makes me question the future of the MCU that I hadn't really mentioned before, the unclear direction of what's next. Regardless of your opinions of whether Infinity War/Endgame stuck the landing, Thanos was built up as the ultimate threat ever since the mid-credits scene of the original Avengers movie. Started with basic teasers and cameos, then built up more and more through the stories of the various Infinity Stones as audiences were left wondering when the big purple guy would show up and wreck some shit, hooked to watching every subsequent movie to find out more.

Meanwhile, there's no real indication yet of what big bad they could build up to the same level. Random nerd speculation will throw out names like Galactus (especially now that the Fantastic Four are under the rat's umbrella), but in comparison to the Thanos snap, a colossal dude going around eating planets seems a little quaint. And while you could make the argument that Thanos himself didn't appear until four years into the MCU, you also have to consider the pace of movie releases then and now. Phase 1 was six movies over four years; by the end of phase 3, they were cramming six movies into two years. And now they're up to eight movies over two years, though that could be due to needing to make up lost time from the coof, so we'll have to see if they keep up that pace.

If Disney doesn't start dropping teasers within the next couple movies at the most, they're going to lose that hook to entice audiences to find out about the next major villain, which will make it all the harder to regain their momentum. Maybe that's what Eternals is supposed to do since they're a more cosmic hero group, but I sure don't care enough to find out. I'll let online reviewers I can actually tolerate to listen to tell me what's up and make fun of it; in other words, not Bob.
 
Also, accusing "some" Christians of using human body parts in their rituals? Do you know what "blood libel" is?)
Both Chipmans seem to have this strange conception that Christianity can literally justify anything.

Marcia Gay-Harden has the showy part as Mrs. Carmody, the villian of the piece: An unstable holy-roller for whom the mist and it’s monsters MUST mean the End of Days – i.e. time for her to get about the business of saving the sinners… at knife-point, if necessary.​

There’s been a bit of carping in the critical in regards to Mrs. Carmody as a character, or rather the film’s unsubtle implication that The Faithful can be a lot more hateful and deadly than even the creepiest-crawler. To those folks, I reccomend that they hit up Google and take a fresh look at that big freaking crater in the middle of Manhattan. Yeah, Carmody is a being of one-dimensional evil, a “human” entirely void of humanity thanks to their singular devotion to spiritual self-righteousness… and the world is crawling with them. What makes her scary is that she’s entirely recognizable – even if you don’t want to admit it. What makes her possibly the best Bad Guy of 2007 is that Harden pulls it off.​
 
That's another aspect to this that makes me question the future of the MCU that I hadn't really mentioned before, the unclear direction of what's next. Regardless of your opinions of whether Infinity War/Endgame stuck the landing, Thanos was built up as the ultimate threat ever since the mid-credits scene of the original Avengers movie. Started with basic teasers and cameos, then built up more and more through the stories of the various Infinity Stones as audiences were left wondering when the big purple guy would show up and wreck some shit, hooked to watching every subsequent movie to find out more.

Meanwhile, there's no real indication yet of what big bad they could build up to the same level. Random nerd speculation will throw out names like Galactus (especially now that the Fantastic Four are under the rat's umbrella), but in comparison to the Thanos snap, a colossal dude going around eating planets seems a little quaint. And while you could make the argument that Thanos himself didn't appear until four years into the MCU, you also have to consider the pace of movie releases then and now. Phase 1 was six movies over four years; by the end of phase 3, they were cramming six movies into two years. And now they're up to eight movies over two years, though that could be due to needing to make up lost time from the coof, so we'll have to see if they keep up that pace.

If Disney doesn't start dropping teasers within the next couple movies at the most, they're going to lose that hook to entice audiences to find out about the next major villain, which will make it all the harder to regain their momentum. Maybe that's what Eternals is supposed to do since they're a more cosmic hero group, but I sure don't care enough to find out. I'll let online reviewers I can actually tolerate to listen to tell me what's up and make fun of it; in other words, not Bob.
Excellent point. Where do they go now? The MCU up until End Game was build up after build up after build up. You can draw a clear line from Iron Man in 2008 to End Game in 2019. The first movie after End Game was Spider-Man: Far From Home and what was it's teaser? JK Simmons playing J Johna Jamenson playing Alex Jones and Nick Fury's in space. Beyond that, and something that's directly asked in The Eternals trailer, the only thing left is who's gonna be the new Avengers? Are we gonna have another TEN YEARS of basically the same movie that builds up to....what exactly? I'm a little in the know with the marvel universe and some of the biggest threats have already been taken care of, Thanos, Ultron, and Dormammu. The only threats that I can think of that have the same levels of danger that those do are Galactus, but like @King Dead said his wind's kinda taken out of the sales after Infinity War, maybe Gorr the God Butcher who might be a tie in for the symbiotes , who's already going to be a throw away villain of the week in Love and Thunder so that's done, other than that it's the weird eldritch stuff which will not translate to film and The One Below who is Marvel's Satan. Is Riri Williams, Lady Thor and Spider-Cuck gonna punch out Satan after getting holy boxing gloves from The One Above, who is Marvel's God?

The well is tapped. They shot their load with Infinity War and I think we're gonna see some real diminishing returns. I think @Positron posted the cap of someone talking about Black Widow being brushed aside and I had completely forgotten that it was even a thing. I don't see anyone squeeing for Black Widow. The only "discourse" I've seen, besides the little bit that Bob complains about Widow being put online and in theaters, has been about how great Wandavision is and they now have a female Chinky director. Those are the only things I remember being talked about the MCU this year.
 
Meanwhile, there's no real indication yet of what big bad they could build up to the same level. Random nerd speculation will throw out names like Galactus (especially now that the Fantastic Four are under the rat's umbrella), but in comparison to the Thanos snap, a colossal dude going around eating planets seems a little quaint.

Is Galactus even interesting enough as a character to be the next overarching big bad?

He's not even really evil, right? Isn't he just basically a force of nature who has to do what he does just because?
 
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