Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

How much does Ryann weigh?

  • 300-350lbs (Panda Bear)

    Votes: 26 1.0%
  • 350-400lbs (Bull Caribou)

    Votes: 146 5.5%
  • 400-450lbs (Heart of a Blue Whale)

    Votes: 379 14.2%
  • 450-500lbs (Pigmy Hippo)

    Votes: 545 20.5%
  • 500-550lbs (Domestic Pig)

    Votes: 394 14.8%
  • 550-600lbs (Baby Grand Piano)

    Votes: 318 12.0%
  • 600-650lbs (Vending Machine)

    Votes: 192 7.2%
  • 650+ (A Fucking Planet)

    Votes: 661 24.8%

  • Total voters
    2,661
You guys... holy shit. Nick did porn with this chick!

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This could be it, guys. Tess runs in sex-positive circles where outing a sex worker to her family without their consent is a big no-no, so this could be what finally gets her on the shit list of the IG and TikTok crowd
 
She spends a ton of money on her hair. You'd think she could see a dermatologist and get a facial once in a while.

Details, Lex! We need details and quotes you overheard from Tess.
Also, FYI: we're now calling you "Lex: the younger, thinner, prettier, more fashionable Tess". :tomgirl: 💋

Seeing a dermatologist or getting facials is pointless until she fixes her fucking diet, which is full of sugar and shitty seed oils. Seriously, what you eat does make a huge difference in the appearance of your skin, and if you consistently eat garbage, it will show on your face, no matter how many external treatments you try. Got big pores and blackheads? It's truly amazing what cleaning up your diet can do for that, after countless products and treatments have failed.

You guys... holy shit. Nick did porn with this chick!

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Anybody who would willingly date Nick in the first place is bound to be a trashfire. Making porn with him for your OnlyFans? Trashfire status confirmed. Everybody involved here is a shitty person, and I have no sympathy for any of them. At least there isn't going to be another unfortunate kid for Nick to abandon.
 
Meh, gonna need more proof besides vague “mentally abusive gaslighter” accusations which are utterly meaningless terms in 2021. Of course, Lex is highly encouraged to prove me wrong.
I believe her, being as she's just confirming what we already know and what we've archived of a long pattern of Nick's shitty behavior going back years. Any screencaps are better than none, obviously, but we already know he's a piece of shit and any new info coming out that further sinks these two retards into a hell of their own making is always good to see.
 
Anyway, this girl lost almost 100 pounds during the pandemic,
That's quite an accomplishment, honestly; especially since every chick and their mothers blame quarantine for “covid 15 (20, 30...)”
Nick must have been sulking,
They make pore filling primer for like $12

Got big pores and blackheads? It's truly amazing what cleaning up your diet can do for that, after countless products and treatments have failed.
That's why I asked, is it something she can fix, or is it something that just exist. I can laugh at someone's genetic unfortunate (Virgie Tovar exists, yo), but only once, cause, well, that genetics and shit happen.
And I know that things that claim to “shrinking pores” don't do shit, because it's “holes” in the skin, they can't be made smaller through whole surface.

So, is her skin dirty? Is it “empty” and can't be filled? Or is it something that can be reversed/ affected by diet?
I read about links between acne and diets, but haven't found any study that shows a strong correlation between them. My quite qualified cosmetologist advises against trans fat (lol, J), dairy and excessive sugar - usual stuff, but studies I read as a layman disagrees, as well as the classic “the water clear/moisturize your skin“ :(
 
I read about links between acne and diets, but haven't found any study that shows a strong correlation between them
At the very least if you're eating greasy food the grease will probably get on your face. Either directly, or it'll get on your hands and then you subconsciously touch your face.
 
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And I know that things that claim to “shrinking pores” don't do shit, because it's “holes” in the skin, they can't be made smaller through whole surface.
It is possible to temporarily shrink pores with products; you just have to maintain it by continuing to use them.
 
Anybody who would willingly date Nick in the first place is bound to be a trashfire. Making porn with him for your OnlyFans? Trashfire status confirmed. Everybody involved here is a shitty person, and I have no sympathy for any of them. At least there isn't going to be another unfortunate kid for Nick to abandon.
I never understand why so many women date dudes who have abandoned one or more kids already and within months of dating go on to get pregnant themselves. Not sure if it’s a serious lack of judgement or if the desperation is just that high for fat chicks but it’s like watching someone willingly put their hand in a fire and then crying about how they never expected to get burned.
 
Man, I'm just amazed she hasn't been canceled yet.
What else is it going to take, honestly? Others have been 'canceled' over less.
Im late replying to this but, I think she also is getting a pass because 1. She’s a female, 2. She’s obese and apparently FA groups are in right now. But also the fact that she claims she was abused by her ex-husband. So she’s got a few things going for her that makes it more difficult to cancel her altogether.

Also, Chrissy Teigan is in trouble right now because several years ago she sent some messages to Courtney Stodden and Lindsay Lohan telling them to “kill themselves” and shit like that. Tess hasn’t done anything close to that, yet.

I never understand why so many women date dudes who have abandoned one or more kids already and within months of dating go on to get pregnant themselves. Not sure if it’s a serious lack of judgement or if the desperation is just that high for fat chicks but it’s like watching someone willingly put their hand in a fire and then crying about how they never expected to get burned.
But even (medium) fat chicks could do better than Nick. Clearly he has mental health issues, is confused about his gender and sexuality, and pretty much abandoned his son. This is not the type of guy you date, let alone knock you up.

But you know there are really stupid people out there that have terrible judgment so that could be her case as well.
 
"I witnessed and overheard foul things she said with my own eyes." The copyeditor in me is :P

I'm still in shock that he actually dates women in between his meaningful men's room encounters. He only dated Ryann so that he could marry her and get his green card. I guess I find it hard to wrap my head around the imagery of a man who wears tiki huts as a matter of course being legitimately interested in a woman, no matter how hungry she is.

Holy SHit Nikki HUt.jpg

Cluster Bs attract other cluster Bs. You guys called it in this thread: Both Ryann & Nick are abusers, and this chick is yet another human dumpster fire. A case of "when assholes collide." And then blow chunks all over each other, like that farting hippo video.

Edit: Beaten by @Angry New Ager for human trash fire metaphor.
 
Im late replying to this but, I think she also is getting a pass because 1. She’s a female, 2. She’s obese and apparently FA groups are in right now. But also the fact that she claims she was abused by her ex-husband. So she’s got a few things going for her that makes it more difficult to cancel her altogether.

Also, Chrissy Teigan is in trouble right now because several years ago she sent some messages to Courtney Stodden and Lindsay Lohan telling them to “kill themselves” and shit like that. Tess hasn’t done anything close to that, yet.
Maybe she hasn't bullied any kids online or anything to that nature, but as I said: others have been canceled for less. And tess has done so much. Hell, sometimes someone brings up things she's done in this thread again and again and I'm reminded over and over after forgetting because she's done so much it's sometimes hard to keep up and remember it all. From scamming, and racism, to being a fake KUHWEEEEER, to being a massive hypocrite. The list goes on.

She's literally a walking check list of shit people get chastised for online, and yet she STILL gets away with it, no matter how current or long ago her offenses were. She's a fucking enigma.
 
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I believe Lex, and I'm sorry she went through that. Nik is a piece of shit, I've always held him a little higher than Tess because he kept his mouth shut publicly, but that's not saying a whole lot overall. It doesnt mean hes not still a complete piece of shit.

Hell I believe Tess was put through his narcissism, and shes still a piece of shit. Multiple concurrent truths.

Anyway, I'm glad Lex got free of nik, I'm glad she didnt end up having his baby, even though that loss is also probably emotionally painful for her (multiple concurrent truths). I hope she can move forward, heal herself, and do better, because she deserves better.
 
Ugh, can someone finally please cancel this bitch, which she's begging for by her very own standards? Miss Woke AF actually had the audacity to call someone's family and rat on them for making amateur porn, seriously? Lex needs to keep spilling details. Not only because I'm dying to know (and I am) but also because the initial vaguetweets only make it sound like hurt feelings and generic conflict. The details are everything.

I keep saying the same thing. And it's getting old when people just shrug and say Ryann wasn't relevant to begin with. When you have a Bona Fide A-List Hollywood actor, dead now for over FORTY YEARS being roundly cancelled over an over FORTY year old Playboy interview--complete with ATTACKS against same actor's daughter who has NOTHING to do with nothing other than being the man's daughter...

Everyone has lost the fucking plot.

Cancel culture will stop when everyone applies EQUALITY and CONSISTENCY, and Ryann Hooves is a fantastic start for restoring high standards.
 
I wonder how Tess is going to respond to this. She can't play this halfway and say "You're telling the truth about Nick but not MEEEEEE!!!!", especially since calling an abused woman a liar is a bad look for her.

My guess is that Tess will try to ignore this as long as possible, then make a bunch of vague bitchy posts full of clown emojis when people start brining it up to force her to respond.
I think Tess will do the whole "Lex didn't get the whole side of the story and heard the back things from Nick who is an abuser and when I would call him it was when it was at my lowest" blah blah blah rinse repeat. And she will flat out deny the outing her as a sex worker comments or blame that on Nick, too.

Kinda interested about the pregnancy loss thing. Did Lex miscarry or agree to have an abortion? Which begs the question... if she was coerced into it or in hindsight she realised she didn't want one and has regret and blaming Nick is better than blaming herself?

I believe Lex, and I'm sorry she went through that. Nik is a piece of shit, I've always held him a little higher than Tess because he kept his mouth shut publicly, but that's not saying a whole lot overall. It doesnt mean hes not still a complete piece of shit.

Hell I believe Tess was put through his narcissism, and shes still a piece of shit. Multiple concurrent truths.

Anyway, I'm glad Lex got free of nik, I'm glad she didnt end up having his baby, even though that loss is also probably emotionally painful for her (multiple concurrent truths). I hope she can move forward, heal herself, and do better, because she deserves better.
I feel the same, I don't really know who Lex is but she doesn't seem as terrible as Tess or Nick so it's sad she's had to experience this.
 
I feel the same, I don't really know who Lex is but she doesn't seem as terrible as Tess or Nick so it's sad she's had to experience this.
She posted her personal garbage online in a breathy "Okay, guise, so here's what happened, I know you're just *DYING* to hear this!!!111" tone so it's already clear that she has the maturity of a 12 year old. It isn't hard to keep private shit private if you, you know, don't broadcast it on the Internet. It's a good thing the kid didn't pan out as I have zero doubts she'd produce yet another histrionic, self-absorbed type like herself. Yeah, we read it because it's funny & because, God help us, we're following along with the drama, but the fact remains that these people are voluntarily vomiting their inane, sophomoric bullshit for everyone to see. The world really doesn't care if Nick is an asshole or if Lex got her fee-fees hurt.
 

I read about links between acne and diets, but haven't found any study that shows a strong correlation between them. My quite qualified cosmetologist advises against trans fat (lol, J), dairy and excessive sugar - usual stuff, but studies I read as a layman disagrees, as well as the classic “the water clear/moisturize your skin“ :(
Your skin is an organ. A lot of people know this and say this, but sometimes it's really hard to get your mind around the fact that it isn't a metaphor.
To elaborate a bit, your liver has a limit to how much sugar it can process at a time, so when you eat too much sugar it literally strains your liver. Literal actual pressure. Physical damage.
Similar stuff happens with the food you eat and other organs. It's hard to find studies on acne and diet because humans are all different, and race and your microbiome all play a role.
Milk may be bad in general, but for people with a large colony of lactose-eating bacteria in their gut, it may actually be super helpful. Similarly, someone with genetically high cholesterol would actually be ok with a higher-fat diet but may be at risk at lower sugar-intake levels than other people.
All of which to say, Tess is gross, what she's eating is gross, her skin is gross, and her organs we can't see are most likely super-gross.
 
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