Diseased Neo-Pagans / Witches on the Internet / Witchblr - SMT IRL, but with fatties

[RazorBackBacon]

Didn't the Romans turbofucked the druid religion to death way before Christianity was a thing? Is very suspect that all of the sudden all these celtic revival and neo-druid people pop up claiming they are the true and honest tradition when even a thousand years ago most of that stuff was probably lost to time and only very biased Roman accounts remain.


all of shinto rites seem very heavily tied to place, must be very akward making that work if you are not living in Japan or have roots there. If you are in an american town you'd basically have to invent new local kami to worship and stuff because no pre-existing tradition exist, might as well call it something else, like generic animism.

I don't know much about Shinto but I do recall hearing about a way to essentially entice one of the kami of an area to come with you and come live in your new shrine.

Kami are innately tied to place, but you don't need a repositioning rite. That's used more for official shrine relocation. Really all you need is an official shinto priest to find a place and declare it as having a powerful kami attached. The ideal is a location of natural beauty with some kind of local legend accompanying it.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Kami are innately tied to place, but you don't need a repositioning rite. That's used more for official shrine relocation. Really all you need is an official shinto priest to find a place and declare it as having a powerful kami attached. The ideal is a location of natural beauty with some kind of local legend accompanying it.

Thanks, appreciate the info. But if those truly are the only three requirements then there are lots of places in the USA that would qualify for a shrine, hell I can think of two or three places right off the top of my head in my local area that would work.

Not that I'm planning on trying to found one just food for thought.

 

[Flexo]

So yankee doodle Billy would have to travel to Japan, make a ceremony to steal the kami from his ancestral hometown shrine then take it back with him in a pickle jar back to his homemade shrine in his backyard. Well, seems like a plan that should go over splendidly, it would be pretty funny to see weebs trying and advertising it.

Well that sounds like the plot to an anime...

Thanks, appreciate the info. But if those truly are the only three requirements then there are lots of places in the USA that would qualify for a shrine, hell I can think of two or three places right off the top of my head in my local area that would work.

Not that I'm planning on trying to found one just food for thought.

I wonder if I can get a shrine set up in the south with a Confederate kami...

That could also be an anime.

 

[LinkinParkxNaruto[AMV]]

Well that sounds like the plot to an anime

Starring this guy

Kami are innately tied to place, but you don't need a repositioning rite. That's used more for official shrine relocation. Really all you need is an official shinto priest to find a place and declare it as having a powerful kami attached. The ideal is a location of natural beauty with some kind of local legend accompanying it.

i remember hearing about the japanese doing something like that when they occupied Korea and China, establishing shrines in those countries which generated butthurt and were eventually torn down and replaced after WWII.

 

[RazorBackBacon]

Thanks, appreciate the info. But if those truly are the only three requirements then there are lots of places in the USA that would qualify for a shrine, hell I can think of two or three places right off the top of my head in my local area that would work.

Not that I'm planning on trying to found one just food for thought.

Talk to a shinto priest, sure he can get you fixed up.

Well that sounds like the plot to an anime...

I wonder if I can get a shrine set up in the south with a Confederate kami...

That could also be an anime.

I'd watch it.

 

[Flexo]

Starring this guy
View attachment 2414766

Shit I want to watch that right now.

 

[Baloney Face]

The perfect Confederate kami for the current year.

1) Almost looks like anime.
2) Transgender (Ole Miss not Ole Massa).
3) Already has a following.

 

[NoReturn]

Kami are innately tied to place, but you don't need a repositioning rite. That's used more for official shrine relocation. Really all you need is an official shinto priest to find a place and declare it as having a powerful kami attached. The ideal is a location of natural beauty with some kind of local legend accompanying it.

This ties in to that "Northern Hemisphere" religion thing I was talking about earlier. It may not be called a kami, but a lot of places have some kind of resident spirit/god/whateverthefuckyouwannacallit.
Iceland has the Huldufólk, so don't build a road through their house; Germany had specific spirits (like the kobold Hinzelmann) who inhabited certain castles; down in Mexico you had Chaneque in specific trees; etc.
In @LinkinParkxNaruto[AMV]'s example with Korea, I guess one would argue that the "kami" was there before the Japanese showed up, and would remain there without the shrine, because the "kami" exists in that spot regardless. You don't really need a Japanese kami to have a reason to make a shrine or perform specific actions, at the most basic level you just need a beautiful area which has a "thing" living in it.
It does have to be beautiful, though. You can't just do what these TikTok hippies are doing in their backyards. "Love of nature" and "Purity" are two of the core shinto beliefs.

Spoiler: Photos

I looked into some of the shinto shrines in the US, and I think Byodo-In Temple

and Tsubaki Grand Shrine of America

are two that I'd love to go check out in person someday because of what's around them (nature vs. city).

Like @Sleazy Car Salesman pointed out, if your religious belief is just "spirits exist in beautiful natural places, then it doesn't have to be Japan, but then you kind of have a spiritual imperative to keep that area beautiful. You can't just throw some Target lawn furniture on the grass and call it a day, you'd have to do things like spend your own time cleaning up litter or fixing up structures like they do in and around shinto shrines.

 

[Flexo]

This ties in to that "Northern Hemisphere" religion thing I was talking about earlier. It may not be called a kami, but a lot of places have some kind of resident spirit/god/whateverthefuckyouwannacallit.
Iceland has the Huldufólk, so don't build a road through their house; Germany had specific spirits (like the kobold Hinzelmann) who inhabited certain castles; down in Mexico you had Chaneque in specific trees; etc.
In @LinkinParkxNaruto[AMV]'s example with Korea, I guess one would argue that the "kami" was there before the Japanese showed up, and would remain there without the shrine, because the "kami" exists in that spot regardless. You don't really need a Japanese kami to have a reason to make a shrine or perform specific actions, at the most basic level you just need a beautiful area which has a "thing" living in it.
It does have to be beautiful, though. You can't just do what these TikTok hippies are doing in their backyards. "Love of nature" and "Purity" are two of the core shinto beliefs.

Spoiler: Photos

I looked into some of the shinto shrines in the US, and I think Byodo-In Temple
View attachment 2416338
and Tsubaki Grand Shrine of America
View attachment 2416340
are two that I'd love to go check out in person someday because of what's around them (nature vs. city).

Like @Sleazy Car Salesman pointed out, if your religious belief is just "spirits exist in beautiful natural places, then it doesn't have to be Japan, but then you kind of have a spiritual imperative to keep that area beautiful. You can't just throw some Target lawn furniture on the grass and call it a day, you'd have to do things like spend your own time cleaning up litter or fixing up structures like they do in and around shinto shrines.

It's not just the North. Africa also has a strong tradition of spirits and land.

Africa: land, tribes, and animist traditions

My post last week about South African land confiscation and the history that underlies it aroused a lot of interest. It was linked all ov...

bayourenaissanceman.blogspot.com

Briefly, every place, and everything within a place, had its own spirit or spirits. Some of these were natural beings: the "spirit of the tree", etc. Others were human spirits, the "ancestors", who had taken up residence in natural features in order to keep an eye on their descendants, both individual (family ancestors) and the tribe as a whole (the spirits of great tribal leaders). There were also negative human spirits, failed leaders or criminals or generally bad people, who tried to lead their descendants astray. Sacrifices were (and in many places still are) offered to the spirits of a place, and to the ancestors, in order to propitiate them. (For example, at a river crossing, I've found food, cans of soda, etc. being tossed into the river to propitiate the spirit or "goddess" of the river, translated as "Mama Water", so that she would not come down in flood and damage the tribe's crops.) I've written before about some aspects of such beliefs in Africa, including witchcraft.​

These spirits, particularly ancestral spirits, occupy a very important place in traditional African tribal belief and customs.​

[Snip]

Be that as it may, ancestral spirits in particular are tied to the locations where they lived and died. I've had some African friends point out to me the tree, or hill, or rock, or stream where the spirits of their family ancestors reside. They'd put out offerings to them on a regular basis, to propitiate them and make sure they were sending them good luck. To ignore an ancestor was to anger him or her, and ensure that they'd send bad luck instead. If their descendants moved away from that place, the ancestors would no longer be able to help them, and might even turn against them, because such offerings could no longer be left for them.​

That's why the tribes in much of Africa found it so traumatic to be dispossessed of their land during the colonial era. They weren't just being cut off from the tribal economy; they were being separated from their ancestors. It was a spiritual bereavement as much as a physical loss.​

[snip]

The demand for the confiscation of white-owned farmland and its restoration to its original tribal owners stems from this reality. The animist view is that the ancestral spirits of the tribe are still present on that land. They have not been honored or propitiated properly for generations, due to the confiscation of the land; and until they are, the misfortunes that beset tribes during and after the colonial period will not cease. That, in essence, is at the heart of demands to take back the land from its white owners, whose own ancestors seized it from the tribes during the colonial period.​

 

[Baloney Face]

This ties in to that "Northern Hemisphere" religion thing I was talking about earlier. It may not be called a kami, but a lot of places have some kind of resident spirit/god

Indeed. And a lot of locales in (former) Christendom have their own patron saints.

 

[Small-arms Supremacy]

This ties in to that "Northern Hemisphere" religion thing I was talking about earlier. It may not be called a kami, but a lot of places have some kind of resident spirit/god/whateverthefuckyouwannacallit.

I'd argue this is universal and not just Northern specific. Pre Islamic Arabs prayed to the local jinn for protection while travelling. This is referenced in the Quran in chapter 72, verse 6 as a common occurrence. From the Islamic perspective most if not all worship of spirits or local deities could be explained by people worshipping jinn since they're sentient like we are and can do things people consider supernatural. Hell we don't even believe the devil is fallen angel but is a jinn so even Satanism is an example of this.

 

[Flexo]

I'd argue this is universal and not just Northern specific. Pre Islamic Arabs prayed to the local jinn for protection while travelling. This is referenced in the Quran in chapter 72, verse 6 as a common occurrence. From the Islamic perspective most if not all worship of spirits or local deities could be explained by people worshipping jinn since they're sentient like we are and can do things people consider supernatural. Hell we don't even believe the devil is fallen angel but is a jinn so even Satanism is an example of this.

Animism - Wikipedia

en.m.wikipedia.org

Although each culture has its own different mythologies and rituals, animism is said to describe the most common, foundational thread of indigenous peoples' "spiritual" or "supernatural" perspectives. The animistic perspective is so widely held and inherent to most indigenous peoples that they often do not even have a word in their languages that corresponds to "animism" (or even "religion");[9] the term is an anthropological construct.​

 

[fuzzyrodent85]

Spoiler

That's your ex from high school? Bitch get a life.


Ehhh. . . I'm not so sure about that.


She should learn some anatomy and also look up some better fonts.


She must be a really shitty cook.


Well, I hope this fine enby gets zie's dream of getting 97%-ed someday.


Seeing the art of all the other "witches" I really REALLY don't want to hear their music.


Don't fatshame uwu.


How about you stop watching japanese cartoons late at night and actually do something with your life?



Summon the power of the barbussy!


If every relationship you've been in has been "abusive" maybe you're the problem.


You look like a retard on crack.


If you ever find yourself praying to God over Tumblr drama you should start googling "therapists near me" and I don't mean the bdsm kind, you dirty minded freak.


Period blood is always the answer.



If I was a feminist I would be a terf.


What a fucking little bitch baby.


Sure! They really like pastries, and their cookies with 41% cup chocolate chips!


It never ends.


This black magickkk practitioner wants to have hawt sex with this guy and pour her period blood all over his face I'm calling it right now.

Or how about you call the cops?!


Wut.

Go to an optometrist before reddit.


Fuck your mom to complete your love quest.

Yes, like the aforementioned emoji spell.


K bro.


What is with these people and not getting laid?

None.

Spoiler

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Have these people ever considered that part of the reason they can never actually contact demons and fey is because they lack the drive that would interest a demon or fey?

You want to sell your soul to the devil to learn guitar? Great! He'd be more than happy to oblige, but you need to have a bit of Micheal Jordan in you, a bit of that "I want to be on the next level". Same with fey, you think a fey is going to entertain themselves with some fat laze about who just draws dumb shit on the floor with period blood and can't tell the difference between sugar and salt? Fuck no. Fey want to fuck with people who go out and do shit, they're more fun.

 

[NoReturn]

Spoiler: Responses

animism is said to describe the most common, foundational thread of indigenous peoples' "spiritual" or "supernatural" perspectives.

I love this shit so much.

[TikTok]

Why do they never show the cleanup where they unceremoniously sweep it all into the dustbin?

She must be a really shitty cook.

Magical kettle corn!

Seeing the art of all the other "witches" I really REALLY don't want to hear their music.

You want to sell your soul to the devil to learn guitar? Great! He'd be more than happy to oblige, but you need to have a bit of Micheal Jordan in you, a bit of that "I want to be on the next level".

You also have to still put in the work, which to them then immediately translates into "Then why would I even bother doing magic in the first place?" Which... yes.

How about you stop watching japanese cartoons late at night and actually do something with your life?

"Stop telling me it's normal! You fuckers are supposed to be supporting my delusions!"

Summon the power of the barbussy!

Wut.

The disrespect. I feel bad for these gods. It's ridiculous. I feel like I'm watching that old Ikea ad with the lamp all over again.

None.

You know, when you really think about it, this premise isn't even correct. Just as none of these LARPers are doing "real" magic, neither are any of the "princesses" being called out here actually acting like princesses.
I don't see any one of them, for example, working on humanitarian aid, or being a patron of the arts, or anything like that.

Content

Will it not melt?

Put it on some day-old fries after running them through the air fryer.

This person seems to be pretty scared of animals for someone who claims to be a lynx, but looking through her post history she seems to be going through a rough time and honestly this does sound like there was something there that night.

This person also has my sympathy. This shit sucks, and the idea of intrusive thoughts hijacking your spiritual life is a recipe for disaster. Ugh, this is depressing. I'm gonna hunt for some luls.

Ah, that's better. I see someone has been reading See You in my 19th Life.

---

Video content - On the topic of past lives

Spoiler: TikToks

Spoiler: This lady gets her own section

Also, the moon is currently almost down to 0% illumination, so if there's a habit you want to start doing once a month (like cleaning old shit out of your fridge), do it now so you can be reminded to do it again next month when the witches start going off again.

 

[Shaka Brah]

Will it not melt?

Beeswax is solid at a range of temperatures. That's why it's such a good building material for beehives, and why candles don't melt into puddles in people's pockets. This isn't as dumb as it may appear though it's definitely not a permanent thing.

 

[Agarathium1066]

Content
View attachment 2422922
Will it not melt?
View attachment 2422993
Put it on some day-old fries after running them through the air fryer.

Also, the moon is currently almost down to 0% illumination, so if there's a habit you want to start doing once a month (like cleaning old shit out of your fridge), do it now so you can be reminded to do it again next month when the witches start going off again.

Depending on the heat in the area that beeswax will start to deform and melt, its likely that little hole they put in the top will give way first and its going to plop onto the floor. If its not super soft from the heat in the room its going to break apart once it hits the floor. RIP.

Here's an idea for your salt: Put it back in the shaker or salt bag, you yutz. If you can't google 'what is salt used for in rituals' then you're up a creek. It being pink adds nothing to it but makes it more desired by people for fanciness.

 

[eternal dog mongler]

Have these people ever considered that part of the reason they can never actually contact demons and fey is because they lack the drive that would interest a demon or fey?

Bacchus had his wild orgies and Cybele got people to cut off their genitals. What kind of self-respecting god wants to watch people whine on the internet all day long?

The most annoying thing about internet witches is that they're all so banal. C'mon you're a pagan get wild with it.

 

[Baloney Face]

Cybele got people to cut off their genitals.

That sort of thing is quite common these days, and well documented here at Kiwi Farms.
But in the current year self castration is an entirely secular pursuit.

 

[RazorBackBacon]

The most annoying thing about internet witches is that they're all so banal. C'mon you're a pagan get wild with it.

All these witches and not a one of them gets naked in the woods at midnight to howl at the moon. So weak.