E
EI 903
Guest
kiwifarms.net
Those can't even be people. Those are horrific creatures from an Edward Lee short story escaped into our world. Jesus.
The Retail Horror Thread 2: More Tales to Chill your Bones
- Thread starter Surtur
- Start date
Those can't even be people. Those are horrific creatures from an Edward Lee short story escaped into our world. Jesus.
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2014
WHY IS THERE NO VOMIT RATING!
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2013
What in the blood-soaked heavy metal Christ did I just read.
...
...cooty bumps...
Closed my eyes briefly and saw Leonard Shaner's moronic grin and vacant stare, with a double order of Slaton sister in the background in a hideous wheelchair contraption. If you need me, friends, I'll be in the Reclusiam, attempting to see if the Emperor truly protects.
...
...cooty bumps...Closed my eyes briefly and saw Leonard Shaner's moronic grin and vacant stare, with a double order of Slaton sister in the background in a hideous wheelchair contraption. If you need me, friends, I'll be in the Reclusiam, attempting to see if the Emperor truly protects.
- Joined
- Mar 13, 2015
Have you guys ever dealt with retards,wanting to break shit up?.
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
More than once. it was not uncommon for people mad about one thing or another try to smash things.
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2014
What in the blood-soaked heavy metal Christ did I just read.
...
Closed my eyes briefly and saw Leonard Shaner's moronic grin and vacant stare, with a double order of Slaton sister in the background in a hideous wheelchair contraption. If you need me, friends, I'll be in the Reclusiam, attempting to see if the Emperor truly protects.
- Joined
- Apr 10, 2013
Now, are you meaning douchebags that just want to break shit, or do you mean actual mentally-deficient slow-in-da-minds that weren't taught/trained to act better in public?
- Joined
- Mar 13, 2015
- Joined
- Nov 28, 2014
You need to write a book about all the weird, unsettling people you've met, littlebiscuits; I would totally buy it. I swear you emit some kind of pheromone that attracts these weirdos.
- Joined
- Jul 23, 2014
They wear a Kiwi Farms shirt to work.
- Joined
- Oct 9, 2013
There must be, because my Dad and sister have the same effect on people.
- Joined
- Nov 28, 2014
Please tell me you can share some of their stories at some point! That would be amazing.
- Joined
- Aug 22, 2013
My dad runs a store, and although I usually work behind the scenes I do sometimes do the retail thing and I have a few stories:
One Direction Maniac
One day I'm working in the shop and a tween girl comes up to me and asks if we have any magazines with One Direction in them. Pretty much ALL the magazines had 1D in them (this was at the height of their fame), so I took her over to the teen section and began pointing out all the different magazines, thinking she might get one or two or maybe not even get anything at all, because we often get kids who browse the cards and magazines without buying anything.
She bought everything.
Literally, she bought one of every single magazine in the entire shop featuring 1D.
I was pretty amazed by this, but I rang it up (it came to well over $70) and she gives me cash and all is well. I finish working the counter and go off to get some change from the bank. I return an hour later and my dad pulls me aside and tells me he had a very irate woman come in complaining her daughter spent all her money on "crap" and that she wanted a refund.
Apparently she'd given the girl a hundred dollar note because it was all she had on her, thinking her kid would buy maybe one magazine and give her the change and she blamed me for selling them to her. My dad explained that there was no reason to not serve her daughter, but offered to refund her money as long as she returned the magazines. She did... except her daughter had already pulled out all the posters, so he couldn't refund her. She cursed him out and swore she would never shop there again, although every wednesday she unfailingly returns to buy lotto tickets...
Keno Guy
There's this guy who comes in once every month or two and always blows between 2-5 thousand dollars at a time on a lottery game called Keno. He always stood out because of the sheer amount of money he would spend at once. Anyway, for years he would come in every couple of months, spend way more than he won usually (although once or twice he did get lucky), and then leave. Last year, we noticed he hadn't been in for a while. Almost a whole year passed with no Keno Guy. Eventually, my dad found out the reason Keno Guy was no longer gracing us with his presence; he'd been arrested for embezzling money. Apparently, all the money he'd dropped on Keno came from his criminal activity.
Fucking kids
I think there's an unwritten rule about shitty parents using shops as babysitters for their kids. We regularly get parents dropping their kids off to flip through our magazines and trading cards while they go through the supermarket. Fucking shit happens. Kids coming behind the counter, kids messing up displays, kids playing hide and seek... fucking kids, man. It's really the parents who are at fault, though. Thankfully we've never had any nappies stuffed in the magazine racks, but you know it's just a matter of time.
One Direction Maniac
One day I'm working in the shop and a tween girl comes up to me and asks if we have any magazines with One Direction in them. Pretty much ALL the magazines had 1D in them (this was at the height of their fame), so I took her over to the teen section and began pointing out all the different magazines, thinking she might get one or two or maybe not even get anything at all, because we often get kids who browse the cards and magazines without buying anything.
She bought everything.
Literally, she bought one of every single magazine in the entire shop featuring 1D.
I was pretty amazed by this, but I rang it up (it came to well over $70) and she gives me cash and all is well. I finish working the counter and go off to get some change from the bank. I return an hour later and my dad pulls me aside and tells me he had a very irate woman come in complaining her daughter spent all her money on "crap" and that she wanted a refund.
Apparently she'd given the girl a hundred dollar note because it was all she had on her, thinking her kid would buy maybe one magazine and give her the change and she blamed me for selling them to her. My dad explained that there was no reason to not serve her daughter, but offered to refund her money as long as she returned the magazines. She did... except her daughter had already pulled out all the posters, so he couldn't refund her. She cursed him out and swore she would never shop there again, although every wednesday she unfailingly returns to buy lotto tickets...
Keno Guy
There's this guy who comes in once every month or two and always blows between 2-5 thousand dollars at a time on a lottery game called Keno. He always stood out because of the sheer amount of money he would spend at once. Anyway, for years he would come in every couple of months, spend way more than he won usually (although once or twice he did get lucky), and then leave. Last year, we noticed he hadn't been in for a while. Almost a whole year passed with no Keno Guy. Eventually, my dad found out the reason Keno Guy was no longer gracing us with his presence; he'd been arrested for embezzling money. Apparently, all the money he'd dropped on Keno came from his criminal activity.
Fucking kids
I think there's an unwritten rule about shitty parents using shops as babysitters for their kids. We regularly get parents dropping their kids off to flip through our magazines and trading cards while they go through the supermarket. Fucking shit happens. Kids coming behind the counter, kids messing up displays, kids playing hide and seek... fucking kids, man. It's really the parents who are at fault, though. Thankfully we've never had any nappies stuffed in the magazine racks, but you know it's just a matter of time.
- Joined
- Nov 28, 2014
I used to work as a cashier in a grocery store. When I had only been working there for a few weeks, a couple came to my register with a cart full of stuff; from their accents I could tell that they were from a state far souther than my native Kansas. They were pretty rude to me over things I couldn’t control (for example, they thought something was on sale when it wasn't and bitched at me when they didn't get a discount). When I was ringing stuff up, the guy handed me a food stamps card while he kept talking with his wife. Now, you need to understand something important. I live in a very affluent area so getting food stamps is a very rare occurrence. In fact, that was the very first time I got one of those cards, so I had no idea what to do with it.
I called customer service using the phone by my register, making sure to keep my voice as low as possible while turning away from the customers. I even said “food stamps” so quietly I actually had to repeat it a bit louder because the girl at the front desk couldn’t make it out the first time. I didn't want to embarrass them; I may have grown up in a well-off environment, but I know how to treat people who aren't as fortunate as me. Anyway, the girl from customer service immediately came over and helped me out and I finished checking the couple out. Right afterwards I wrote down how to input food stamps on a piece of paper so I wouldn't forget how to do it. I forgot about the whole thing soon afterwards.
The very next day, my manager pulled me aside and told me that the guy I checked out had called the store the night earlier, claiming that I had made his wife cry and had basically humiliated them in front of the whole store (for the record, the wife looked perfectly fine when I watched them walk away). They basically acted like I had gotten on a loudspeaker and announced to the entire store that they were on food stamps. And, like I said, they were out of state. It’s not like they’re going to be dodging accusing stares from their neighbors. Anyway, my manager was very sweet and understanding about it and told me that she knew that I would never do something like that on purpose and that I wasn't in any trouble. Then she told me that the guy had demanded store credit in exchange for my employers hiring such a horrible cashier who spits on poor people, which my managers ended up giving him to placate him.
So basically, these people tried to get me in trouble (and maybe even fired) because they wanted fucking store credit. I've heard countless stories about this shit happening to other people (not just regarding food stamps; people try to get retail employees fired over the smallest benefits they might get in exchange). It still makes me mad sometimes.
I ended up quitting soon afterwards but then got a new job in the floral department of the same store. It's amazing how less stressful retail work is when you don't actually have to interact with customers all that often.
I called customer service using the phone by my register, making sure to keep my voice as low as possible while turning away from the customers. I even said “food stamps” so quietly I actually had to repeat it a bit louder because the girl at the front desk couldn’t make it out the first time. I didn't want to embarrass them; I may have grown up in a well-off environment, but I know how to treat people who aren't as fortunate as me. Anyway, the girl from customer service immediately came over and helped me out and I finished checking the couple out. Right afterwards I wrote down how to input food stamps on a piece of paper so I wouldn't forget how to do it. I forgot about the whole thing soon afterwards.
The very next day, my manager pulled me aside and told me that the guy I checked out had called the store the night earlier, claiming that I had made his wife cry and had basically humiliated them in front of the whole store (for the record, the wife looked perfectly fine when I watched them walk away). They basically acted like I had gotten on a loudspeaker and announced to the entire store that they were on food stamps. And, like I said, they were out of state. It’s not like they’re going to be dodging accusing stares from their neighbors. Anyway, my manager was very sweet and understanding about it and told me that she knew that I would never do something like that on purpose and that I wasn't in any trouble. Then she told me that the guy had demanded store credit in exchange for my employers hiring such a horrible cashier who spits on poor people, which my managers ended up giving him to placate him.
So basically, these people tried to get me in trouble (and maybe even fired) because they wanted fucking store credit. I've heard countless stories about this shit happening to other people (not just regarding food stamps; people try to get retail employees fired over the smallest benefits they might get in exchange). It still makes me mad sometimes.
I ended up quitting soon afterwards but then got a new job in the floral department of the same store. It's amazing how less stressful retail work is when you don't actually have to interact with customers all that often.
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
These people are the reason I grew to have so much contempt for working in retail.
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2014
The hobo redpill manager I had at Gamestop didn't care about anything except actively pissing people off. We got a number of mentally handicapped people in the store, and for whatever reason he enjoyed antagonizing them.
One day this didn't work out for him so well. I walked in the day after this happened and he had a giant bruise on his forehead with a semi-black eye. Apparently, he decided to start picking on a teenage autistic kid, and the kid (rightfully so) quickly had enough of his shit, so he hulked the fuck out and started throwing empty cases from the sticky bin (the stand with the cheap, shitty, dirty, unwanted games, mainly old sports games). The kid had good aim, so he nailed hobo manager in the head with at least 5 games before the kid's wrangler heard the commotion from outside and went in to intervene. That was the only day I wish I would have been working with that asshole.
- Joined
- Aug 31, 2015
I worked the night shift at Taco Bell one summer during high school, so I have a bucketload of stories to tell.
We had a woman come in every night at 10 pm on the dot and order a good $50+ of food, which she would explain to us how to prepare in precise and excruciating detail -- down to how many damn 'speckles' she wanted on each tortilla. Of course, since her request was completely and utterly insane, we never lived up to her expectations and she'd chew us out for it. Still, our manager refused to ban her from the store because she came at a pretty dead time of night and she was 'one of our best customers.'
We'd get the stoners and druggies on my shift a lot too, and I was usually working the drive-through whenever they came by. I once had a man opine upon the legality of something he called 'elephant juice' and had my fair share of wasted teens sound out every letter on the drive-through menu when they tried to make their order. Of course, we always had to check the bathrooms to make sure no one was stashing anything or shooting up in a stall. (The manager was actually busted for aiding and abetting drug deals in the parking lot after I left, so it might've all been to distract us -- I dunno.)
My favorite Taco Bell weirdo, however, was a woman who became known as just 'Granny.' One night, in walks this sweet little old lady -- could've been anyone's Grandma-sort of woman -- and she places her order as politely as one can at a fast food joint close to midnight. I figured that maybe it was for her grandkids or something but after I gave her her burrito and watched her for a minute, it got... odd. There was something coming out of her sleeve. Thought it was a trick of the light or maybe 'cause I'd been working a ten hour shift, but my coworker pointed it out too. Then I realized it. She had brought a fucking rat into the restaurant with her. Not just one rat though, but a good three or four popped right out of her sleeve and went to town on that burrito. She sat there, just smiling, until one of the girls in back came out to clean and flipped her shit. The rats climbed right back up her sleeve, and the old lady looked at us like we'd all grown second heads or something. She tottered right on out, taking her half-eaten burrito with her, and we never saw her again.
We had a woman come in every night at 10 pm on the dot and order a good $50+ of food, which she would explain to us how to prepare in precise and excruciating detail -- down to how many damn 'speckles' she wanted on each tortilla. Of course, since her request was completely and utterly insane, we never lived up to her expectations and she'd chew us out for it. Still, our manager refused to ban her from the store because she came at a pretty dead time of night and she was 'one of our best customers.'
We'd get the stoners and druggies on my shift a lot too, and I was usually working the drive-through whenever they came by. I once had a man opine upon the legality of something he called 'elephant juice' and had my fair share of wasted teens sound out every letter on the drive-through menu when they tried to make their order. Of course, we always had to check the bathrooms to make sure no one was stashing anything or shooting up in a stall. (The manager was actually busted for aiding and abetting drug deals in the parking lot after I left, so it might've all been to distract us -- I dunno.)
My favorite Taco Bell weirdo, however, was a woman who became known as just 'Granny.' One night, in walks this sweet little old lady -- could've been anyone's Grandma-sort of woman -- and she places her order as politely as one can at a fast food joint close to midnight. I figured that maybe it was for her grandkids or something but after I gave her her burrito and watched her for a minute, it got... odd. There was something coming out of her sleeve. Thought it was a trick of the light or maybe 'cause I'd been working a ten hour shift, but my coworker pointed it out too. Then I realized it. She had brought a fucking rat into the restaurant with her. Not just one rat though, but a good three or four popped right out of her sleeve and went to town on that burrito. She sat there, just smiling, until one of the girls in back came out to clean and flipped her shit. The rats climbed right back up her sleeve, and the old lady looked at us like we'd all grown second heads or something. She tottered right on out, taking her half-eaten burrito with her, and we never saw her again.
- Joined
- Feb 18, 2014
As a rat lover and owner, I cringed at the thought of someone feeding what I assumed to be pet rats such garbage.
- Joined
- Nov 28, 2014
I kind of love this.
The idea of a sweet little grandma carrying rats around in her sleeves warms the cockles of my heart.
- Joined
- Jul 23, 2014
Until a few escape and start an infestation in some unsuspecting restaurant.