CWC moved to Central Virginia Regional Jail

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Pointless Sperg said:
It's quite possible that he'll develop a new fixation with whatever entertains him the most that is available to him in jail. Chris needs stimulation. He'll either find it in his mental fantasies, but those are never as good as something in the real world if it's available and if it makes him feel good. So if there's something, ANYTHING, that he finds pleasant in jail, he will undoubtedly fixate on it.

Of course put any of his old joys in front of him and there's a good chance they'll win out. Whatever ring of jingly keys is the shiniest.
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So, chess or bid whilst? Those were the only 2 things available when I was in jail.

Maybe The Bible?

Or I could see him lying his way into a methadone program just to have something to do (there but for the grace of god, etc...)
 
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LiquidKid said:
Not exactly. The common trend with every one of Chris’s “potential sweethearts” was Chris’s unwillingness to actually try. He has always gone for the easiest possibly method because he wants to be given sex, he doesn’t want to actually earn a relationship.
His sign he used to carry around wasn’t there because he wanted to find someone, he wanted someone to find him and apply. He went after that girl that pretended to be into liquid Chris because he saw that as an easy get, he went after JULIEEEEEEH because “she” messaged him first.
And remember when he made his “I’m starting a sonichu company” video? Part of that was he was looking to hire a slim, attractive, Kung fu lesbian to do all of his chores, create a cartoon he has full creative control and starring roles in, potentially fuck him, and most importantly, find him a girlfriend and coach him on lesbian sex techniques. He wanted this because despite making his “love quest” his sole reason for existence since high school, Chris has no desire to do anything to actually get a woman to want to be a part of his life. He’s rather use axe body wash in the hopes that the commercials were accurate, or try and get people to attend a totally not creepy “lesbian slumber party.”

Chris wasn’t even willing to break his “PS Triple” to get with “Jackie” when at the same time he has already destroyed a PS3 for seemingly no reason.
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You're mistaking lack of motivation for laziness. Those are two very different (though related) things. Destroying his PS3 (for money) was probably the most forethought Chris has ever put into anything, and that's about the limit of his capabilities.

If "Jackie" was standing right there in Chris' room and ordered him to go shower, or no china, he would. If she ordered him to draw a whole issue of Sonichu in one go and then we can have a roll in the hay, he'd bang that issue out faster than any he ever had, provided she was standing there the whole time reminding him any time his mind wandered and he started futzing with legos. If she stood there naked amidst the hoard and told Chris to smash his PS3 and then they'd fuck, because PS3 smashing turned her on, that PS3 would not survive.

That's why Chris "cheated" on his hypothetical exes. Whatever jingly keys are there, that's what will have his attention. That's why even though he had his final girlfriend in Barb he still thirsted after Bella while Bella was on the phone with him. If somehow he was actually considered fuckable he'd cheat in real life on every chance he got even if logically he'd know he'd get caught later.

From everything we've seen of Chris, he is literally incapable of ignoring something he likes unless something he likes more is immediately presented.

Almost everyone starts out like this as a child -- most grow out of it -- but there are quite a few adults like this too, they're just not as entertainingly retarded as Chris.

Uncle Sid said:
So, chess or bid whilst? Those were the only 2 things available when I was in jail.

Maybe The Bible?

Or I could see him lying his way into a methadone program just to have something to do (there but for the grace of god, etc...)
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Chess is probably a no-go. Chris does love to play cards but he'd almost certainly cause trouble just like he did with Pokemon. More likely, given the opportunity, he'll stick with what he knows and just make his own Pokemon cards and play against Magi-chan or something.

The only reason Chris isn't an opioid addict is because he never had easy access and he is unwilling to try something he thinks is "bad" unless a girl gets him to do it. Notice how quickly he got into alcohol when he was taken on a "date" and was on the path to becoming dependent on it.

No idea what's available in the regional jail he's in though. If he gets over a year and gets sent to prison there will probably be some craft classes or something that I could see him getting super into.
 
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Kramer on the phone said:
Honestly surprised no one decided to do this

its been an entire month with no one giving us reports on him. he could anything from completely catatonic to near-normal. its the first time since high school he's had a half dozen tard wranglers around to tell him what to do. there has to be someone a-loggy enough to do it.
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I'm imagining he's gone Full Robert deNiro from Cape Fear. Just with Sonichu themed tats.
 
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Pointless Sperg said:
No idea what's available in the regional jail he's in though. If he gets over a year and gets sent to prison there will probably be some craft classes or something that I could see him getting super into.
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Maybe he'll learn the fine art of toilet wine. Or become the world's worst jail tat artist.
 
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Pointless Sperg said:
No idea what's available in the regional jail he's in though. If he gets over a year and gets sent to prison there will probably be some craft classes or something that I could see him getting super into.
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As a rule of thumb, demand meets supply. Chris' charges make any attempt at a contraband forecast futile. If he were simply locked up for violating a protective order then you could pretty confidently say that Chris was offered whatever he could afford within 15 minutes of getting in his pod, and probably by a guard, but incest on his papers changes that.
 
RodgerDodger said:
I'm imagining he's gone Full Robert deNiro from Cape Fear. Just with Sonichu themed tats.
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Sen. Howell Tankerbell said:
What does this mean? Is he just getting shuffled around or this this like a move to a higher security facility type of deal?
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The more local county jails most likely have limited capacity and wouldn't always be able, or even suitable, for holding prisoners for extended periods while he's awaiting trial. Regional jail is probably a larger facility thats just one great big waiting room for felons still being investigated to sit in till they get sentenced
 
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