Trashfire 07/18/2021: Gunt Vs Null Weight Loss Challenge

[Pill Cosby]

At this point should do a penis size challenge with Ralph to see if Gator confirms Ralph's penis size. The. Null should then do a contest on who can last the longest getting a blowjob then wait until Gator confirms. Finally Null should do a competition to see how far they can shove a 10 inch dildo into their rectum and see if Gator confirms that Ralph is the winner on all three.

"Ralph I sucked your penis and I got jaw ache before I swallowed your load, even when shoving that dildo in your rectum you was able to take it all. I wish Josh Virgin Moon was as good as you Ralph." - Gator

 

[Hex Cat]

I assept your challenge Nool, you fucking faggot moron.

This is Warski vs Tonkasaw all over again. Ethan Ralph is 2021's new Tonkasaw.

Null's gonna be standing in that ring with the killstream theme playing weighing 150 lbs and he'll take the mic and declare to the over 300 lbs 5'1 Ralph to "never step up to a man"

 

[Cabelaz]

Just take meth and eat your eggs in the morning

 

[Oughtism]

Who needs troons at the Olympics when you've got the purest of autistic competitions right here? Go null!

 

[byuu]

Don't underestimate Ralph.
He might be going on a prison diet again.

All that exercise pleasing his cell mate Jamal worked wonders before.

 

[Papa Adolfo's Take'n'Bake]

This is per bottle of Maker's Mark. Gl, guntleberg.

 

[GuntN7]

All your fitness advice suck, go to a nutritionist, and ask for a diet and exercise routine to loose weight as fast as possible without having skin hanging.

 

[NibbaBibba]

All your fitness advice suck, go to a nutritionist, and ask for a diet and exercise routine to loose weight as fast as possible without having skin hanging.

Why pay someone who'll just tell you to eat less?

 

[Heavy Rainfall2]

Everyone already recommended keto so try making this since it's delicious, inexpensive, and surprisingly filling
- Cook bacon until its done but floppy
- Spread cream cheese on it
- Throw whatever low carb veggies you want on sliced thin
- Roll them up, stick a toothpick in them, then eat them later
If Ralph doesn't try to bitch out there's no way he wins though, dude doesn't even have enough discipline to start his show on time everyday and that's his job

 

[Cucktry Roads]

I'm going to have to come out and put my foot down and call Null out for aylawging here. Null is LITTERALLY trying to kill Ralph.

Do you not think that the parasitic entity that is Ralph's Gunt won't start attacking its host should it start being physically threatened?

 

[MeltyTW]

I'm going to have to come out and put my foot down and call Null out for aylawging here. Null is LITTERALLY trying to kill Ralph.

Do you not think that the parasitic entity that is Ralph's Gunt won't start attacking its host should it start being physically threatened?

ralph might actually hurt himself if he tries some stupid weight loss scheme to "own the aylawgs" putting the side piece of a competition above the main thing which is health.

 

[Welcome to the Show]

Null's gonna be standing in that ring with the killstream theme playing weighing 150 lbs and he'll take the mic and declare to the over 300 lbs 5'1 Ralph to "never step up to a man"

When Ralph says he’s 5’11” I imagine he’s talking about the circumference around his waist.

 

[HackerX]

The alternate outcome is Null starts lifting and juicing, gains 50 lbs of muscle, and is now jacked.

Loses the battle but wins the war

 

[DawnDusk]

This is the Battle of the Century. I am thoroughly excited.

I see some shitty bioscience has already trickled in, and you already know keto/carb cycling works for you, but I really hope you take up exercise too during this challenge. This is an opportunity to change your life.

BLUF: if so, don't do cardio. It's great for your heart but isn't the best for weight loss because it slows your metabolism and increases your appetite. Resistance training (weightlifting) is a much better supplement to your diet for burning fat.

Sources:

Physical activity, total and regional obesity: dose-response considerations - PubMed

In response to well-controlled, short-term trials, increasing physical activity expressed as energy expended per week is positively related to reductions in total adiposity in a dose-response manner. Although physical activity is associated with reduction in abdominal and visceral fat, there is...

pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

The response to exercise with constant energy intake in identical twins - PubMed

Seven pairs of young adult male identical twins completed a negative energy balance protocol during which they exercised on cycle ergometers twice a day, 9 out of 10 days, over a period of 93 days while being kept on a constant daily energy and nutrient intake. The total energy deficit caused by...

pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

Physical activity in the treatment of the adulthood overweight and obesity: current evidence and research issues - PubMed

Randomized trials consistently show benefits of exercise for weight loss, but the effects are often modest. This may result from small sample sizes, short study duration, and poor adherence to the exercise prescriptions. To better define the doses and types of exercise that will promote...

pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

Please let me know if you're interested: I can easily help you come up with a resistance routine that will surprise you in efficacy and simplicity. There are other fit farmers with some sagacity to offer, as well.


I'd legitimately love to see Null's fat ass get fit and healthy. His dour disposition would likely improve dramatically.

Let's go Josh!

P.S.

(Edit: If anyone knows what you'd ask for for a doctor's note where it's like, for a sporting event or something and the height/weight is important, let me know.)

Such a thing largely doesn't exist with a general practitioner, but you can accomplish this goal by both agreeing to get DEXA scans with radiologists and sharing the reports. Added benefit of knowing who has muh big bones.

 

[Thumb Butler]

Very stupid of Ralph to accept this challenge. Without the gunt he's nothing, a nobody. No gunt, no Ralph.

 

[LordOdin]

Chantal was right @Null how much money do you need to het a coke addiction started

 

[Jack Awful]

Congrats to Ralph for weighing less than a man a foot taller than him.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

I think my favorite part is how absurd the whole thing is. Normally when I think of something like a weight loss challenge I think of two people who are having a friendly competition for their mutual benefit. Something a couple of friends or g rated youtubers would do to get healthy. Not here though.

Just for a moment, imagine that you're some normal person on the outside looking in, maybe with some news articles out of Vice or the WSJ to help them get a quick idea of what's going on.

Here you have Ethan Ralph, a mean spirited alt-right anti-vax podcaster kicked off of youtube for holocaust denial challenging Null, a professional internet bully who has driven 7 people to suicide with his evil website. Now you find out, normal person, that these two do not like each other and are in fact in a mean spirited rivalry, yet have mutually decided to enter into a weight loss challenge. I explain further that they require a lawyer to act as an escrow for the 30 pieces of silver that is on the line, and that they need to go to extreme lengths to get proof of their height and weight because both accuse the each other of constantly lying. It's beautiful and I want it to happen.

I love the internet so god damn much.

 

[Sam Losco]

So where in the 7/12 stream did Ralph explicitly agree to the challenge?
Gator! Gator clip it for us dumb alawgs!

 

[Salubrious]

I think my favorite part is how absurd the whole thing is. Normally when I think of something like a weight loss challenge I think of two people who are having a friendly competition for their mutual benefit. Something a couple of friends or g rated youtubers would do to get healthy. Not here though.

Just for a moment, imagine that you're some normal person on the outside looking in, maybe with some news articles out of Vice or the WSJ to help them get a quick idea of what's going on.

Here you have Ethan Ralph, a mean spirited alt-right anti-vax podcaster kicked off of youtube for holocaust denial challenging Null, a professional internet bully who has driven 7 people to suicide with his evil website. Now you find out, normal person, that these two do not like each other and are in fact in a mean spirited rivalry, yet have mutually decided to enter into a weight loss challenge. I explain further that they require a lawyer to act as an escrow for the 30 pieces of silver that is on the line, and that they need to go to extreme lengths to get proof of their height and weight because both accuse the each other of constantly lying. It's beautiful and I want it to happen.

I love the internet so god damn much.

You forgot that while most weight loss challenges are mutually beneficial, this one could literally end in death due to alcohol withdrawal. Then Kiwi Farms might have an actual for real body count.

I hope Ralph put Xander on his life insurance, but that would also involve planning and not being a selfish piece of shit