11/24 Happy thanksgiving from Chris

[The Dude]

Probably. He must have been setting up to make Thanksgiving this year, rediscovered the cutlery, and recalled they were shit he sold - not remembering that he didn't actually sell any. Since he's perpetually demanding more money and rarely uses kitchen utensils as it is, it's just another thing to try and hock - the 'still sharp after 10 years' bit specifically as it can't have been used more times than can be counted on one hand.

I think he sold exactly one set; the one they own. Babs and Bob bought it out of pity-uh...I mean, bought it to "encourage" their special widdle boy.

I just looked up that thing and it's SIXTY-EIGHT FUCKING AMERICAN DOLLARS.

Chris will probably ask $250 for it. "C'mon folks! This is a classic piece of American innovative cutlery! You can cut, serve, and mix with it! It's a bargain!"

 

[SnergenFlergen]

Over a decade old, and my Spatula Spreader is still as sharp as ever and makes that fun "sproing" noise on the cutting board.

Funny how things don't succumb to wear and tear when they're never used because their owners are always off at McDonalds or something instead

 

[Garfieldchu]

So, would you eat a plate of this stuff? What would it take for you to eat at Chris' house?

 

[FatFuckingClown]

Flirt that skirt, Kraft that mac, and mash those 'taters, you mighty Lesbian Transwoman, you.

 

[Slowinthemind]

So, would you eat a plate of this stuff? What would it take for you to eat at Chris' house?

Can you put a price on your own life?

 

[ZeCommissar]

Bone Apple Tea Chris.

I hope you get even fatter, that heart disease is coming sooner or later.

 

[BF 388]

I bet he took a lot of pleasure in smooshing those Double-d taters

 

[kobebyarlant]

Chris just has some weird autistic need to shill for name brand products. It's simply that.

 

[m0rnutz]

So just how sharp are these spatula knives he tried to sell? Asking for a friend.

Is it just cheap hard plastic with a stainless steel handle with the sharpness of a butter knife, or is it an actual knife in the shape of a spatula?

 

[Bustcakes]

I'd love one of those. We tried to find one a couple of years ago, and you can't get the flat coil type any more. Okay, I'm used to gas now and wouldn't want anything else now, but still...

You can, at least in the U.S.! I bought one for myself earlier this year.

Chris' beige dinner wouldn't look out of place at the Wilcher's.

 

[Mister Grumpy Pants]

I didn't think chris celebrated Thanksgiving because McDonald's is closed on holidays

 

[Robotic Richard Simmons]

So he spends Thanksgiving being a shill for a product nobody cares about? Congratulations weens and tranny pills, we could have had a Sonichu Thanksgiving comic if you would have left him alone.

 

[QT 219]

All these years on the Internet and Chris still hasn't figured out how to monetize his social media accounts or YouTube videos. He then unironically pitches utensils from a company he used to work for over a decade ago for no other reason than to say he likes the product and gets paid zero dollars for it. Does he think mentioning it will get CUTCO to send him free knives?

If so, that's pretty naive.

 

[Optimus Prime]

If so, that's pretty naive.

Chris in a nutshell. Of Autism.

 

[Trombonista]

He couldn't even make the cranberry sauce himself? The Ocean Spray bags of cranberries give you instructions.

Edit: Disregard this, last night I realized he probably doesn't know the difference between a simmer and a boil.

 

[Bluespike]

I bet Billy Mays would double the offer

 

[The American Hedgehog]

All these years on the Internet and Chris still hasn't figured out how to monetize his social media accounts or YouTube videos.

He does monetize YouTube.

https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_money#YouTube_monetization

 

[DatBepisTho]

I was wondering if we'd get Thanksgiving material from him, and boy did he provide.

View attachment 156449

He's shilling my favorite tea now?
Dat tea prep tho.

 

[QT 219]

He does monetize YouTube.

https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_money#YouTube_monetization

Sorry, I should've been more clear. He hasn't figured out how to "effectively and efficiently" monetize his social media accounts or YouTube videos. If he cracked down on releasing content to paid subscribers on his own website and what not, he could effectively generate enough income to be self-sufficient. Does the state of Virginia provide payees for the mentally disabled?

 

[BALLZ-BROKEN]

Funny how things don't succumb to wear and tear when they're never used because their owners are always off at McDonalds or something instead

I wonder if he used it to cut open his gooch hole.

And then he didn't wash it, and left it fester in the kitchen drawer for a year before pulling it out and using it to plop some ham like turkey and mashed taters on Barb's plate...