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- Jan 5, 2015
Chris will befriend a plank of wood.
2017 Chris-Chan Prediction Thread - What do you think the new year shall bring (or take away from) our favorite lolcow?
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- Feb 6, 2016
I think Chris will ramp up his begging as the amount of debt the two have bears down on them over time. I don't think Barb dies this year, maybe next year. I don't think we'll have any other interesting sagas, I hope to be proven wrong, but Chris is too used to the whole fake girlfriend thing. Maybe Trump will inspire him to commit some form of crime that will put him back into the court room, but I doubt it.
chaospickle
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 26, 2016
If I'm not mistaken, there is a Yugioh movie coming to theaters this year at some point and I'm sure Chris is going to see it. Maybe even Chris will start playing the card game again. I'm hoping for some ridiculous homemade cards but I'm not too optimistic.
I also think there's an MLP movie coming out this year too. From what I understand, there's a new art style for characters. I saw some pictures awhile back and didn't notice anything that different but I know Chris obsesses over tiny details sometimes. Could this be Blue Arms 2.0?
I also think there's an MLP movie coming out this year too. From what I understand, there's a new art style for characters. I saw some pictures awhile back and didn't notice anything that different but I know Chris obsesses over tiny details sometimes. Could this be Blue Arms 2.0?
- Joined
- Jul 14, 2016
I wanted to say Chris gets arrested by reports of "preying" on women in public restrooms. But Virginia doesn't have a bathroom bill, and Chris can pee as he wants.
Someone offers Chris his own website again. That or he makes a tumblr. Like in the past, his web design skills are lacking and he will leave vulnerabilities in his code, sometimes causing things to not work at all.
Barb dies, Chris does not notice, nor does he show any sign of grief beyond a sigh. We are not made aware until she is found in her bed or chair and a status is made for asspats.
Someone, or the site collectively, sends Chris a care package. By some sheer luck he will actually find the forums and start posting in his forum, sighing and going full autism on the fly. We end up having to either ban him or hide the forum like ADF. This is unlikely.
Barb dies, Chris finds himself homeless. Sometimes we will see him in real life lumbering the aisles of a toy store, trying to haggle the cashier with comic appearances. His tugboat won't afford him a place to live because it is spent on toys. Chris becomes forgotten and dies alone.
Jessica feels sympathetic for Chris and takes him in, post Barb death. They eventually date, and Chris goes public about EVERYTHING they do together behind closed doors. They marry, and Jessica becomes pregnant. Realizing Chris actually is a worthless piece of shit at long last, she divorces and kicks him out, and throws away all his toys. Neo-Chris is born into the world, and the saga continues.(If this happens, I'll be the one shitting myself)
Someone offers Chris his own website again. That or he makes a tumblr. Like in the past, his web design skills are lacking and he will leave vulnerabilities in his code, sometimes causing things to not work at all.
Barb dies, Chris does not notice, nor does he show any sign of grief beyond a sigh. We are not made aware until she is found in her bed or chair and a status is made for asspats.
Someone, or the site collectively, sends Chris a care package. By some sheer luck he will actually find the forums and start posting in his forum, sighing and going full autism on the fly. We end up having to either ban him or hide the forum like ADF. This is unlikely.
Barb dies, Chris finds himself homeless. Sometimes we will see him in real life lumbering the aisles of a toy store, trying to haggle the cashier with comic appearances. His tugboat won't afford him a place to live because it is spent on toys. Chris becomes forgotten and dies alone.
Jessica feels sympathetic for Chris and takes him in, post Barb death. They eventually date, and Chris goes public about EVERYTHING they do together behind closed doors. They marry, and Jessica becomes pregnant. Realizing Chris actually is a worthless piece of shit at long last, she divorces and kicks him out, and throws away all his toys. Neo-Chris is born into the world, and the saga continues.(If this happens, I'll be the one shitting myself)
- Joined
- Sep 3, 2016
chris will get his shit together and save up enough money while working at mcdonalds to buy kiwifarms, null will rub his hands together while hunched over and laughing at the stupid goyim.
Chris will then ban all of us and complain on facebook about how the forum is getting no traffic and people aren't donating to him.
Chris will then ban all of us and complain on facebook about how the forum is getting no traffic and people aren't donating to him.
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2016
I think it's a combo of all of the above. Chris will climax when Barb dies and then shit himself financially and do nothing.
- Joined
- May 13, 2016
Chris will continue his sweetheart search, scam a bunch of weens, and blame us for all his short-comings.
- Joined
- Jan 5, 2015
What's his next "front"? Wax figures?
- Joined
- Mar 10, 2013
Chris attends an anti Trump rally and gets a tiny bit of media airtime, annoying ADF to no end.
- Joined
- Aug 27, 2016
Kikomi
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 10, 2016
i saw it mentioned earlier in the thread, but i can definitely see chris getting a tattoo, probably having to do with being a lesbian trans woman or whatever. and by getting a tattoo, i mean googling how to give yourself one and then attempting a botched stick-and-poke.
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2014
He'll get worse. And as Donald Trump, First of His Name, God Emperor of the American Imperium, Slayer of the Cunt Queen of Chaos, and Grabber of Pussies, continues to rebuild our society from the rule of the SJW leftist fuckboi menace, many lulz will be had as Chris realizes that his fairytale world that he shares with countless others is falling apart, and that there will be no hope for their movement to rebuild.
Angel Bob
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2014
Around the inauguration, Chris will say something that gets him a visit from the secret service.
Chris is diagnosed with diabetes after fainting from a blood sugar spike. Instead of changing his diet, Chris constantly whines on facebook about his illness and uses it to beg for money.
Barb gets sued by another credit card company. Another creditor may call in their debt. Power/water/cable/phone gets turned off leading to more begging from Chris.
Chris does something insane which gets him arrested and possibly evaluated for a few days in a mental hospital. A hilarious email will leak about his time amongst the slow in the minds.
Barb clings to life for another year.
Chris finally gets a wig, but it's a cross between Shmorky's and one of those cybergoth dread wigs.
Chris is diagnosed with diabetes after fainting from a blood sugar spike. Instead of changing his diet, Chris constantly whines on facebook about his illness and uses it to beg for money.
Barb gets sued by another credit card company. Another creditor may call in their debt. Power/water/cable/phone gets turned off leading to more begging from Chris.
Chris does something insane which gets him arrested and possibly evaluated for a few days in a mental hospital. A hilarious email will leak about his time amongst the slow in the minds.
Barb clings to life for another year.
Chris finally gets a wig, but it's a cross between Shmorky's and one of those cybergoth dread wigs.
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- Joined
- Jan 15, 2014
Begging will intensify as the financhu crisis worsens. Barb will have a health scare, but will remain alive. However, her mental health will continue to decline. Chris will chimp out about Trump for a week after inauguration before being distracted by something shiny. More animals will be acquired.
Things get really interesting in September, when Chris comes out of the closet following a drunken encounter at Impulse with a burly yet gentle longshoreman.
Things get really interesting in September, when Chris comes out of the closet following a drunken encounter at Impulse with a burly yet gentle longshoreman.
A
AW 006
Guest
kiwifarms.net
Chris' language skills deteriorate to the point where his Facebook posts are completely unintelligible. asspats still will comment.
Oh and Waterman will finally make the drive up to Charlottesville and forcibly sodomise Chris.
Oh and Waterman will finally make the drive up to Charlottesville and forcibly sodomise Chris.
After Barb's death and the loss of 14BC, Chris posts the mother of all tardrage videos blaming President Trump for killing his mother and stealing his house to pay off his own debts, while angrily tweeting at the President's Twitter account.
Donald Trump takes notice, buys back 14BC, and then gives it to Chris as a gift while tweeting that he's done more for the homeless than Obama ever did. Chris continues to hate on Trump even afterwards because Trump didn't "advocate" the office after he'd been officially inaugurated. Chris sells the rights to his life story to Joss Whedon and a movie is made, starring Wil Wheaton as Classic Chris, Will Smith as Chris's CADD teacher, and Scarlet Johansen as Tomgirl Chris. Cole is the sole critic to give it a bad review due to the film's sympathetic portrayal of Barb (but not Bob, who was depicted as an axe wielding Klansman in a MAGA hat whose sole line of dialogue was "Nigger cunt faggot troon spic kike mudslime kebab") and this causes Cole to earn the wrath of Whedon's rat king.
Chris is unable to use the royalties from the film to pay off the debt he accrued because he gave them to Brianna Wu on the understanding that Giant Spacekat would produce a Sonichu game.
Donald Trump takes notice, buys back 14BC, and then gives it to Chris as a gift while tweeting that he's done more for the homeless than Obama ever did. Chris continues to hate on Trump even afterwards because Trump didn't "advocate" the office after he'd been officially inaugurated. Chris sells the rights to his life story to Joss Whedon and a movie is made, starring Wil Wheaton as Classic Chris, Will Smith as Chris's CADD teacher, and Scarlet Johansen as Tomgirl Chris. Cole is the sole critic to give it a bad review due to the film's sympathetic portrayal of Barb (but not Bob, who was depicted as an axe wielding Klansman in a MAGA hat whose sole line of dialogue was "Nigger cunt faggot troon spic kike mudslime kebab") and this causes Cole to earn the wrath of Whedon's rat king.
Chris is unable to use the royalties from the film to pay off the debt he accrued because he gave them to Brianna Wu on the understanding that Giant Spacekat would produce a Sonichu game.
JULAY
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2013
Chris will learn the term "vernal equinox" and proceed to annoy the shit out of everyone by using it incorrectly all year long.
Chris gets fatter, outgrows his bras, and horrifies another female store clerk who is forced to measure him.
After a wig is suggested, Chris freaks out, claims he is NOT FREAKING BALD, but quietly investigates binaural beats that allegedly prevent male pattern baldness. Will forget his overreaction once he becomes convinced it is working, and make a smug gloating video.
Some bizarre ritualistic ceremony intended to magically shrivle the duck (which is bigger than previously photographed, and no longer bent)
Angry that God and the Bear have not provided him with a boyfriend-free girl, he switches to a different sect of Christianity, which he will also understand very poorly, and later denounce.
Childish gesture of rage directed at Lulu.com, such as an "unban me" contract, glitter bombing or an ineffectual boycott.
Finally, a visit from the Secret Service regarding an oddly specific, yet unrealistic threat against elected officials. Chris will poop himself during the interview, allowing him to successfully play the Autism card once again.
Chris gets fatter, outgrows his bras, and horrifies another female store clerk who is forced to measure him.
After a wig is suggested, Chris freaks out, claims he is NOT FREAKING BALD, but quietly investigates binaural beats that allegedly prevent male pattern baldness. Will forget his overreaction once he becomes convinced it is working, and make a smug gloating video.
Some bizarre ritualistic ceremony intended to magically shrivle the duck (which is bigger than previously photographed, and no longer bent)
Angry that God and the Bear have not provided him with a boyfriend-free girl, he switches to a different sect of Christianity, which he will also understand very poorly, and later denounce.
Childish gesture of rage directed at Lulu.com, such as an "unban me" contract, glitter bombing or an ineffectual boycott.
Finally, a visit from the Secret Service regarding an oddly specific, yet unrealistic threat against elected officials. Chris will poop himself during the interview, allowing him to successfully play the Autism card once again.
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