2019-04-10 DSP Got Married - Replacing the Gorilla Munch mascot put us on the bad timeline.

[LyteSydeByll]

What for? Getting married? No chance as of yet, we don't know he used the marathon money for this wedding. Even if we knew he did, he didn't break any rules anyway. So sadly I doubt it. Give it time though, it'll happen.

(image from this tweet https://twitter.com/DateJeff/status/1116353282916651008 )

 

[OneDaySon]

Happy 2 year Leanna engagement anniversary guys! That was yesterday.
Wonder what else happened yesterday.

 

[samovski]

View attachment 722187
(image from this tweet https://twitter.com/DateJeff/status/1116353282916651008 )

Maybe I'm being stupid but, when did he feign distress in a way that would lead to a ban that he hasn't done before?

 

[Salubrious]

I don't think DSP will be banned from Twitch for a couple reasons:

1) He wasn't even given a timeout when he was openly shitting on other streamers for either "dropping everything to play Apex Legends" or when he said that streamers that got to play Sekiro a day early were "a bunch of paid shills that only care about money and don't actually care about gaming" and then continuously made his fingers rubbing together hand gesture that made me want to slap the shit out of him.

2) There's no way to really prove that DSP doesn't have massive tax troubles AND got married on the cheap in CT so that his dying parents could be there. In fact, that's going to be most of his Sunday "podcast"; DSP telling his detractors what a bunch of fucking idiots we are because we all jumped to the incorrect conclusion without any proof that DSP spent all the tax money on a honeymoon.

I guarantee DSP will repeatedly state point #2 on the Sunday stream.

 

[OneDaySon]

He spent his wedding night arguing with trolls on twitter.

 

[LyteSydeByll]

Maybe I'm being stupid but, when did he feign distress in a way that would lead to a ban that he hasn't done before?

You're not stupid. I agree he should likely be banned but probably won't. And i don't think he has been so blatant before about "gonna lose my house" and "my parents are dying" until this chapter. But its not that much different than the previous years of losing his house

 

[Very Honest Content]

Just because a bitch is quiet on stream, that doesn't mean she's nice. She's a proven homewrecker.

Oh no, she got out of her previous relationship that wasn't working for her and married another person, how scandalous!

Tell it to your therapist...wait, on second thought, I take that back, do a flip.

 

[bigasscigar]

Phil will ride twitch until the website crashes and burns. They dont care about snatches being shown on stream. I doubt they give a second thought about a boomer in a constant fluctuating state of financial meltdown.

Phil has been handed a golden opportunity to get his shit together and become a normal human being. For the love of God, dont fuck this up.

 

[samovski]

You're not stupid. I agree he should likely be banned but probably won't. And i don't think he has been so blatant before about "gonna lose my house" and "my parents are dying" until this chapter. But its not that much different than the previous years of losing his house

Ah I see, I thought maybe I'd missed something. I agree he should be banned. But if he keeps making money for Twitch he's safe. It'll take something big to ban him.

 

[BrunoMattei]

Big question: did he force her to sign a prenup?

 

[DiabeticSP]

Big question: did he force her to sign a prenup?

Phil has no salvageable assets she would have access too and they both are full-time working adults (supposedly) so I don't see why he would have.

The only way that could bite him in the ass is if he suddenly became a successful streamer, but he won't.

 

[SkippyLongbottom]

(if our janitors feel like this warrants a seperate thread, just let me know and I'll open one)

I'm seeing some "DSP got married so he must have used (all of) the tax-begging/emerald-seven dollars for this" quotes floating around, which would mean thousands and thousands of dollars. That begs (pun intended) the question: what could be the minimum amount of money DSP has spent to get married in Connecticut?

Rate me optimistic, but looking at the pictures of the rings, DSP's suit, Kat her wedding dress and the location, it really looks like an extremely low-budget happening to me. Let's try to dissect this thing, and come to some kind of price range/minimum cost. Due to DSP's claim his parents paid for the flight and stuff, it could very well be $0 that DSP spent.

DISCLAIMER: I'm not saying that DSP couldn't possibly have spent thousands of tax-begging dollars to arrange all of this. I'm just saying that the probability at this point in time seems rather low, mainly due to the lack of actual evidence of him spending that amount of money. Imho, most things actually point in the exact opposite direction, which I'll try to explain below.


The picture(s)
View attachment 721992

The rings

Well, at this point it's hard to say what they actually cost, but they don't look like any kind of expensive weddings rings. DSP's ring look very simplistic in design. If you'd ask me, they look like something handed down within the family or something, especially the one Kat's wearing, which is not uncommon. One of them or both could be second-hand as well, but IF they were bought in the near past, it almost couldn't have been more than, let's say, $400-500 in total for both the rings.

Possible range of money spent on rings: $0-500

The suit

The suit doesn't look like anything particularly special. Just something you'd rent for a day or some shit. DSP claims it's 10 years old, but it's not clear if it's actually his or someone else's. Could be his dad's.
Could it be 10 years old and actually still fit DSP? Hard to give a definitive answer on that, given the cropped out pictures etc., but if we look at DSP's face/bahdy reveal from July 2009, I'd say: why not? You can say what you want about DSP's fitness in 2019, but he certainly doesn't look fatter than back in 2009. He actually looks slimmer now, if you'd ask me. (no wonder with that horrible "diet" of his)

Spoiler: Fatman Phil from 2009

View attachment 722006

IF the suit was bought recently, you might be looking at a figure of $100-200. I did some searching, and you can actually get some pretty neat looking suits for that price, which look better than the thing DSP is wearing.

Possible range of money spent on the suit: $0-200

The dress

The wedding dress looks like it could be from the 1980's, tbh. Could be from DSP's mother, could be second-hand, could be rented, could be bought. Really hard to pin down a price range for a dress in the case it's bought, simply because the prices for wedding dresses/gowns can wildy vary from extra cheap to tear-inducing expensive. (women...)
So, in this case I'll go with my "low-budget" approach, and say it's a hand-down from within the Burnell family (most likely DSP's mother).

Possible range of money spent on the wedding dress: $0-View attachment 722036


The voyage

This basically means the plane flights. A rounded 7-day trip from Seattle <-> CT for two adults in the Economy class ranges between $800 and $1300. DSP claimed his parents paid for this, so again we're looking at a "possible $0 expenditure" as a starting point.

Possible range of money spent on the voyage: $0-1300

The location

I'm not seeing any kind of special location where they had some a wild, gin-fueled afterparty where 70-year-old Aunt Mirna hit the bottle a bit too hard and started dancing on a table in just her undies.
Instead, we only get some photos taken from within the cramped parental home. They likely went out to dinner afterwards at least, which of course also gives room for the possibilty that DSP's parents paid for that. But in the case DSP paid for that, let's say a dinner for 4 might come down to $300.
If they actually rented a place - which I highly doubt due to the lack of actual friends and direct family that DSP and Kat have, AND DSP's claim of it being a small ceremony - it couldn't have more much more than a couple of hundred bucks. Let's say $500?

Possible range of money spent on the wedding location/"party"/dinner: $0-850

The marriage

"Connecticut: The fee for a Connecticut marriage license is $30 (Thirty Dollars), and is required at the time of application."
(https://www.usmarriagelaws.com/marriage-license/application/fees-cost.shtml )

And then there's still the possibility of DSP's parents covering those costs.

Possible range of money spent on the marriage: $0-30


Conclusion

Possible range of money spent by DSP on "The 2019 Connecticut Marriage Saga":

Possible range of money spent on rings: $0-500
Possible range of money spent on the suit: $0-200
Possible range of money spent on the wedding dress: $0-?
Possible range of money spent on the voyage: $0-1300
Possible range of money spent on the wedding location/"party"/dinner: $0-850
Possible range of money spent on the marriage: $0-30
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Total: $0-2,880 (the dress not included since that could be anything, so going with the "handed down by family" theory)

Now, in the case of DSP not paying for any of that, does $3000 seem like an impossible amount of money for DSP's parents being able to fork over as some kind of wedding gift?
And remember: it's very possible that the amount is even substantially lower due to things like the dress/suit/rings already being in possession within the family and/or being rented and/or being second-hand.

At this point I say: yeah, sure, I can see how it's possible this whole thing could have costed DSP zero/not many dollars, mainly because his parents covered for it.

I do want to add that IF his parents covered the whole possible $3000 cost, it would still be autistic as FUCK to do this whole thing a week before you supposedly need to get an amount of $5000 to supposedly qualify for a payment plan on unpaid taxes.

Well keep in mind Phil is the type of dude to have a vacation 30 minutes away to spend up to 2k just for two days. The timing certainly doesn't help his case at all, as well.

 

[PieceofShet]

 

[DuckSucker]

Imagine marrying someone.

Your wedding photos are taken in his parents duplex by cellphone.

Like, fuck I know we shit on Phil for being a scumbag, but honestly? I wish he'd at least used the tax begathon bucks to take this bitch to Disney World for her honeymoon.

I dont think he was planning on marrying her until sometime after the trip was planned. Its the same ramshackle last minute no effort shit he did proposing to Leanna.

Ive never cared or worried about marriage, like, weddings, I always thought it was women who sometimes planned their dream wedding and shit and put weight on it being extravagant and fancy; with divorce and relationships problems/failing or "falling out of love" I always felt like a destination wedding or an extravagant wedding was kind of unnecessary, I mean taking people to Playa Del Carmen is great and fun, and having your wedding kiss photo be backlit by sunset on the beach is romantic and sweet--but now that youve spelled it out this way I kind of see why they care and I feel a little bad.

Ive always felt the "it's your big day!" was kind of silly, it reminded me of like when youre 7 or 8 and your parents actually take you out and let you invite friends to Lazer Tag or whatever, and get you a cake and theyre like Happy Birthday! I thought it was just something people said in a way, like "Oh this is your day, we'll hang out with you or take you places and play lazer tag with you."

But when you spell it out how fucking spartan his wedding is, how dire and grey, I kind of get it. Yeah it doesnt have to be fantastic, every other wedding were at small churches, nice looking places, maybe a cheaper sort of resort or place you rent out--you follow your budget and who you know, but still try to show people a nice time and you all have a good time at a nice place and make memories for yourself and others.

I feel kinda bad, for Phil. Its depressing in a way. I feel kinda bad for not seeing it earlier too.

View attachment 722187
(image from this tweet https://twitter.com/DateJeff/status/1116353282916651008 )

Hes been warned for this before, for his fundraising, and been struck down for a few days once, but he talked to Twitch staff and said he would be on his best behavior after, so please let him back and remove the strikes, or something. It's a grey area because they get a cut so they dont want to discourage people from spending money on bits and subs, but they arent allowed (I think for some tax disclosure reason) to let streamers openly use the service to facilitate a "fundraiser" for any sort of specific thing. He can say the bits and cheers help his bills, he needs the money, but he cannot ask for "money for this" specifically.

It's some sort of technical loophole. Plus, with feigning distress, they would have to actually see if he really has debt and bills and shit, they dont know so you cant really strike him for that.

 

[SmileyTimeDayCare]

Did she put her makeup on with a trowel?

 

[Grotesque]

Phil has been handed a golden opportunity to get his shit together and become a normal human being. For the love of God, dont fuck this up.

In order for that to happen, Phil would need to get a job and become less notable online.

 

[OneDaySon]

Congrats to Phil its a big step! Clearly makes him happy.
Still, personally, dunno about you guys, but I wouldn't have gotten married around a time when I'm in serious debt to the point my house could be lost and have been doing fundraisers, seeing as how it'd cost money, but also cause people to think you used the fundraising money to get married and as such, will cause viewers to lose trust in you and cause them to donate less, when you critically need it. I'd have gotten married later in the year when this issue was gone and I don't have to worry about what people think as I'm no longer fundraising. Especially since getting married isn't a hugely time critical thing unlike paying taxes, after all, people who are engaged can sometimes wait up to a year or more to get married. But thats just me. What do I know.

 

[ThatGayElfFromDragonAge]

So the thing about Phil lying about his parents dying and all the tax money he owes is that all he did was fool his own fans into paying for his wedding. Amazing that he's going on Twitter bragging about how stupid and negative people are being for being outraged he lied. It speaks volumes for the type of abusive relationship he has with his fans. For all of Phil's talk about PAHSITIVITY, why wouldn't he just be honest from the start and tell everyone he was having fundraisers for a wedding? All he did was bring up negative shit for months ("I'M GONNA LOSE MY HOUSE, I HAVE TO SEE MY DYING PARENTS ONE LAST TIME!") to guilt trip them. I guarantee you he would have gotten more money if he said all that money was for a wedding. I know Phil thrives on drama, but there comes a point when people tune it out and move on.
However, judging by the reactions of his paypigs, they are still so fucking dumb that they'll believe Phil the next time he begs for tax money when it turns out it's for something else entirely and blindly (pun intended) give him their money. They deserve to be robbed by Phil.

he's a cynical douche bag and knew that he would make more bank off of a negative. or he was afraid his fans wouldn't be willing to put up any money on a marriage they know will be over before it really even starts.

 

[samovski]

IDK why but I wanted to see how his forum was taking the news. The difference in traffic is staggering.

Also -



Any discussion on the forum is pointless, he'll address it Sunday.
Then what's the fucking point of your forum?

 

[BrunoMattei]

Phil has no salvageable assets she would have access too and they both are full-time working adults (supposedly) so I don't see why he would have.

The only way that could bite him in the ass is if he suddenly became a successful streamer, but he won't.

You say that but when his parents die he gets their estate and insurance money. That's still something.