[2024] Kiwi Farms Physical Newspaper - Possibly the dumbest idea I've ever had, 2023 edition

[Givi]

Consider serializing some forum goer's novel or short stories. Maybe 50 years from now Wikipedia will be forced to write about how the second Tolstoy got his start writing in The Monthly Shoa, or maybe we'll just get the next Turner Diaries.

This all sounds like a lot of work on top of maintaining the forum and another avenue for frivolous litigation, but if this does happen, every other month would probably be the better format.

Edit: It's too bad Chris fucked up so badly. Sonichu issues could come packaged with it.

 

[Yabbit]

I'd buy it. Doing it at least once would probably (hopefully) be a fun fundraising endeavor. If it ends up being a regular thing, every other month or quarterly would be best.

 

[Great Dane]

In addition to a physical newspaper, can we also start an online newspaper? We have interesting article ideas in this thread and it could be another potential source of revenue.

 

[autosarcophagy]

The Daily Dot and the Daily beast exist so kiwi news definitely cant do worse then that.

 

[David Brown]

sorry if this is late and gay but if you do it, please make the title "Da Update" or at least include a section of it titled "Da Update"

 

[NoodleFucker3000]

I would buy every copy.

 

[Pee Cola]

I don't see why we'd want to balance it out. Politically speaking, one side is trying to actively destroy the Bill of Rights, including those Rights that ought to be due to you and your website as legal, American content, whereas the other is indifferent to us or, at worst, just laughably incompetent.

You'd be surprised at how many people who are (or at least were) on that side who are just as dismayed at what their side is doing to the Bill of Rights.

Spoiler: tangential free speech sperging

Think along the lines of the late Jerry Springer, a liberal who famously said "freedom of speech is not negotiable". The fact that he - as a Jewish person whose parents escaped Nazi Germany - was more than willing to have Neo Nazis appear on his talk show more than once, says to me that free speech is the hill he chose to die on.

Please don't take the current histrionics of the Woke Left as being what the whole of the Left believes. That's as shallow as believing that every Satanic Panic merchant in the '80s is representative of every Right-winger who ever existed.

Back to the topic at hand, if someone wants to put forward arguments that are well thought out and wouldn't breach any laws if published in black and white, I say bring it on.

 

[PointOfNoReturnPoint]

I would love to write an opinion piece, also here are some silly ideas for a name.

Sneed Post
Kiwi Tribune
Farmer's Monthly
Hamster Herald
Corn Inquirer

Sneedalog enquirer.

 

[Marvin]

Can I write a column? I'll review Jewish delis in my travels.

Think along the lines of the late Jerry Springer, a liberal who famously said "freedom of speech is not negotiable". The fact that he - as a Jewish person whose parents escape Nazi Germany - was more than willing to have Neo Nazis appear on his talk show more than once, says to me that free speech is the hill he chose to die on.

https://twitter.com/TheFIREorg/status/1651739755586162689

Jerry Springer and the pre-troon ACLU were my heroes from a young age. David Goldberger was a Jewish ACLU lawyer who litigated Skokie, and now he's left the ACLU for FIRE.

Null is this generations Jerry Springer.

 

[Chromeo]

Probably been said before, but if it's monthly or less wouldn't it just be a magazine? Not a newspaper?

Either way I'm here for Kiwi Monthly. Rosechu centerfold when?

 

[Sundae]

If this comes to fruition (and I hope it does), will there be a comics section, and can I contribute to it? I've always wanted to have a comic published in a newspaper.

 

[Null]

Probably been said before, but if it's monthly or less wouldn't it just be a magazine? Not a newspaper?

yeah it's looking like it'd have to be a "zine" instead of a web pressed newspaper, but that allows us to have glossy pages and shit.

 

[Chromeo]

If this comes to fruition (and I hope it does), will there be a comics section, and can I contribute to it? I've always wanted to have a comic published in a newspaper.

I actually second this, when I was a little kid I wanted to grow up and become a newspaper cartoonist. I will legitimately make KF cartoons for the zine if it's wanted/needed.

 

[Pee Cola]

With all the comic/cartoon talent here on the Farms, I'd unironically buy a print copy of the Kiwi Komics Kollection.

 

[Sigma_Rizzler]

yeah it's looking like it'd have to be a "zine" instead of a web pressed newspaper, but that allows us to have glossy pages and shit.

WE WUZ GLOSSY AN' SHIET

 

[mindlessobserver]

The issue is not the paper itself. It's the manufacturing and distribution. This is not an easy thing to do. There is a reason newspapers are dying. Physical print is very labor intensive.

If you think you can pull it off though, go for it. Words written on paper cannot be retroactively edited or deleted.

 

[Jelli]

yeah it's looking like it'd have to be a "zine" instead of a web pressed newspaper, but that allows us to have glossy pages and shit.

It's going to be a balance between quality and frequency.
As a communication channel cheap pulp is going to be good even if it's not going to save a ton with most printing services.

Consider checking out the formatting of old sci-fi zines.

https://archive.org/details/interzone-111-1996-09-bogof-39

Print setup is a really big job with specialized software beyond just editing.

Editorials can be great if people can manage to not be retarded.

Let us know when you have a format picked out.

 

[Null]

There is a reason newspapers are dying

i think newspapers are dying off because they're available online now and modern journalism is aids.

 

[Mr Steal Your Farm]

i think newspapers are dying off because they're available online now and modern journalism is aids.

I would subscribe to the newspaper, but a newspaper seems like a bad idea from a legal perspective and a business perspective.

The reason platforms work is because the platform owner is not legally liable in the same way that a publisher would be, with respect to defamation law. A newspaper would put you in a different category of tort law that has a much, much lower bar for defamation. Additionally, each individual lolcow could sue the newspaper, and unlike with websites, you might have a substantially harder time recuperating losses, so you could be overwhelmed with a litigious denial of service attack. Additionally, newpapers are regulated nationally, and you would most likely be excluded from much, if not all of the international market, which would mean you only receive a fraction of the potential audience as a website.

I am not an American lawyer or media publisher; my profession is a functionary for the Zimbabwean Ministry of Agriculture. However, that is what I have read online in your American law books and business articles about media, and I can't imagine a lawyer or publisher disagreeing with my sentiment that much.

 

[Neo-Nazi Rich Evans]

Edit: It's too bad Chris fucked up so badly. Sonichu issues could come packaged with it.

honestly a serialized sonichu issue or even just a one off sonichu comic in each issue would have been amazing, and would have definitly got people to buy it. it really is too bad chris fucked his mom, really screwed up a lot of potential chris chan/sonichu lolcow stuff.