[9,10+12-Jun-2019] DSP's E3 Coverage - Preceded by "Mini-Chill Streams", thank goodness

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I can imagine him sitting there in tears, thinking about all the AAA games he is going to have to play. But then his piggy face lights up when the new From Software game trailer plays.

"Elden Ring huh.....Frahm Sahftware..." *squints furiously* "Oh yeah, those games usually make me money tststststs 🐍" *rubs hands with glee*

If it has an actual legit story he's going to hate it.
 
NeckyTheThumb said:
I can imagine him sitting there in tears, thinking about all the AAA games he is going to have to play. But then his piggy face lights up when the new From Software game trailer plays.

"Elden Ring huh.....Frahm Sahftware..." *squints furiously* "Oh yeah, those games usually make me money tststststs 🐍" *rubs hands with glee*

If it has an actual legit story he's going to hate it.
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What I love is the games he think looks great, and he's going to be playing them on Plebstation 4.
 
He's now shitting on Tim Schafer as he has been doing for years, telling the story about how he ran with crowdfunded money, how he is controversial because of things he said and that he's not a likeable guy.

Like... Zero self-awareness. Z-E-R-O.

Clip:
















"Tim Schafer literally took everyone's crowdfunded money, ran with it and never produced the 2nd half of the game."

"Tim Schafer is one of the most controversial figures in the gaming community because of the things he said and done and the people he insulted. He's not a very professional and likeable guy. You're asking for trouble. This guy is infamous for trouble and now you've invited him into your company - I don't get that."

:stress:
 
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The man suffering from auto-immune disease is back.


793348
 
DSP is now pissed off on Legos.

He can't fathom that anyone else would like things that he doesn't like.

Edit: DSP is ranting about a "State of Decay 2" DLC saying that the game sales flopped. I don't think that's true; my Google-fu says that 5 million people have played it and nothing about it being a flop.

DSP is also ranting about how most games at E3 aren't coming out until 2020. It is currently June 2019. Of course most games aren't coming out in the next six months or we would have heard about them by now. Ironically, DSP is shitting on the few things that are coming out in 2019, saying that "nobody cares."

Double Edit: It is amazing how DSP constantly says that everything is a "waste of everyone's time."
 
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For those who dont wanna watch Phil's shit but wants to keep up, here it is summed up - "There was a trailer for [game] but they explained nothing and I dunno what its about." Basically like the past few years. This guy wants a fucking 30 minute presentation full of hyper in depth information for each game, even if they're in super early development and just started. He has no idea what the fuck a teaser trailer or announce trailer is. If you don't come up with an essay of information for him, your trailer sucked and "explains nothing"
 
Does DSP not understand that the next gen consoles are going to have better hardware than previous consoles? He's ranting about 120 FPS saying "no games have worked on that before". He's also ranting about SSD hard drives saying that the current gens should have had them, even though SSDs have become much better in the last 4-5 years.

Edit: DSP is now ranting about Microsoft coming out with something called "Project Scarlett" saying that the word Project is stupid.

Double Edit: Did DSP just say that the previous two Halo games sucked because "they didn't feel in the spirit of the previous games", and then literally in the same sentence said that they "feel like things we've already played before". And then as @OneDaySon said, DSP said "I guess Halo was a teaser trailer". No shit?

Triple Edit: DSP of all people is complaining that Microsoft should have cut their 90 minute press conference down to 20 minutes. He's also ranting about how there was not any new information because "it was already leaked." I guess Microsoft should have come up with new non-leaked information.

Quadruple Edit: Two tips in a row asked if DSP could put his notes on the forums for other people to read. He said no sarcastically and then asked if it was the "new meme" because everyone was asking all of a sudden. "Everyone" being two people in a row. I did like how the first guy asked DSP to take a picture of the notes and upload the picture knowing that DSP would never expend the energy to type them out.
 
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Yeah I can't be fucked with DSP's yearly attempt to be an edgy contrarian who's too real and not a shill so he acts like a shithead about everything. God bless you all who are summarising it.
 
OneDaySon said:
For those who dont wanna watch Phil's shit but wants to keep up, here it is summed up - "There was a trailer for [game] but they explained nothing and I dunno what its about." Basically like the past few years. This guy wants a fucking 30 minute presentation full of hyper in depth information for each game, even if they're in super early development and just started. He has no idea what the fuck a teaser trailer or announce trailer is. If you don't come up with an essay of information for him, your trailer sucked and "explains nothing"
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Explained nothing = they didn't say how long the game will be. Most of the trailers are for revealing the games, they're not supposed to show you everything. I don't think he realises this.
 
I loved how he complained that the trailers are the same as the leaked ones. Dood... Ofc they are the same. Leaked means it got out early. Idiot.
 
DSP only cares about three things when it comes to games shown at E3: When's the release date? How long is the game in monetizable hours? How can he manipulate his audience to either care about it or ignore it depending on how much money he expects to make from it?

Every E3 reaction video boils down to exactly those three things. If a question can't be reasonably answered, he won't have an opinion of the game.
 
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