"ADF" / Philip Vincent Haskins-Delici / Isabel Rosa Araujo - The Original Troon Commie Cow

[Tragi-Chan]

I was just thinking about his request for a sleeping bag.
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Why does he need a sleeping bag when all of his shit will be in that old apartment? Why is he leaving the old place preemptively while his shit stays?

I hope kiwi operatives are able to plant bugs on his furniture before its moved. Although they might have to compete with the actual bugs on Phil's furniture.

He’s probably planning to sleep on the floor in it so he can pretend he’s in Vietnam or something.

 

[Hux]

I still think Phil could have been beaten up into humanhood when he was a child. It's too late now.

There's no cure for being a cunt

 

[Optimus Prime]

I was just thinking about his request for a sleeping bag.
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Why does he need a sleeping bag when all of his shit will be in that old apartment? Why is he leaving the old place preemptively while his shit stays?

I hope kiwi operatives are able to plant bugs on his furniture before its moved. Although they might have to compete with the actual bugs on Phil's furniture.

Moving truck? More like he's having trouble scaring up people in his social circles to sacrifice some time with a vehicle to help him move, since he obviously does not have the means to actually rent a U-Haul or hire a moving company. Or a storage unit he slowly extracts shit from trip by trip with nothing but a backpack.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

I wonder if he’s going to give his toy guns away and if so, is he going to invent some story to explain why he has them when obviously we all know he has an impressive arsenal of real weapons.

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

There's no cure for being a cunt

There is but the treatment is terminal

 

[Mogambo]

Not to mention that as much as he hates his dad (R.I.P.) he used to claim that his Italian-American dad was the Puerto Rican one (and his mother Jewish even though he was raised Catholic and it’s likely she’s just your average Euromutt) and probably is legitimately too dumb to realise that Spanish and Italian are separate languages and conflates the two because both are Romance languages and have a lot of vocabulary words in common.

(and iirc Araujo is a Portuguese surname too, though he took it from a dead troon and is probably unaware of that as well)

Nah, Phil knows his dad was Italian American, and that Italian and Spanish aren't the same. His whole reason for claiming to be Latina is because J. Lo turned him on. That's it. Nothing deeper than that. Unlike a normal person who would just rub one out, Phil decided to Troon out and go full on autogynephile, because autism. He's kept up the "Latinx" identity because it allowed him to pretend he was a precious little POC and it worked out better for his SJW crap. Deep down, Phil is actually very sensitive about the fact that he's white and is scared that his "friends" will find out. I'm reasonably sure that Toren threatened to out him.

The Jewish thing is interesting. He's both antisemitic and yet still somewhat obsessed with Israel and being Jewish. Famously, at one point he became fascinated with Kaliningrad (probably through his map fetish) and claimed his mother's family was from there because he thought it would allow him to claim to be simultaneously Jewish, German (and thus Nazi) and Russian (and by extension Soviet/Communist) without realizing that all of those groups viewed themselves as separate, not some magical happy family.

And yes, Phil DOES think Portuguese is the same as Spanish, because he thinks everything Latin is the same. Hell he probably thinks Spaniards (and Portuguese) are "POCs" because he is that lazy and stereotypical.

 

[Spangled Drongo]

Nah, Phil knows his dad was Italian American, and that Italian and Spanish aren't the same. His whole reason for claiming to be Latina is because J. Lo turned him on. That's it. Nothing deeper than that. Unlike a normal person who would just rub one out, Phil decided to Troon out and go full on autogynephile, because autism. He's kept up the "Latinx" identity because it allowed him to pretend he was a precious little POC and it worked out better for his SJW crap. Deep down, Phil is actually very sensitive about the fact that he's white and is scared that his "friends" will find out. I'm reasonably sure that Toren threatened to out him.

The Jewish thing is interesting. He's both antisemitic and yet still somewhat obsessed with Israel and being Jewish. Famously, at one point he became fascinated with Kaliningrad (probably through his map fetish) and claimed his mother's family was from there because he thought it would allow him to claim to be simultaneously Jewish, German (and thus Nazi) and Russian (and by extension Soviet/Communist) without realizing that all of those groups viewed themselves as separate, not some magical happy family.

And yes, Phil DOES think Portuguese is the same as Spanish, because he thinks everything Latin is the same. Hell he probably thinks Spaniards (and Portuguese) are "POCs" because he is that lazy and stereotypical.

Did he ever outright say he was “transracial” like Rachel Dolezal, or simply deny being white and lie about his family origins when asked? (I did read through the subforum as a lurker back in the day but don’t recall him ever elaborating on his fake ethnicity.)

 

[CheesyBoy]

Nah, Phil knows his dad was Italian American, and that Italian and Spanish aren't the same. His whole reason for claiming to be Latina is because J. Lo turned him on. That's it. Nothing deeper than that. Unlike a normal person who would just rub one out, Phil decided to Troon out and go full on autogynephile, because autism. He's kept up the "Latinx" identity because it allowed him to pretend he was a precious little POC and it worked out better for his SJW crap. Deep down, Phil is actually very sensitive about the fact that he's white and is scared that his "friends" will find out. I'm reasonably sure that Toren threatened to out him.

The Jewish thing is interesting. He's both antisemitic and yet still somewhat obsessed with Israel and being Jewish. Famously, at one point he became fascinated with Kaliningrad (probably through his map fetish) and claimed his mother's family was from there because he thought it would allow him to claim to be simultaneously Jewish, German (and thus Nazi) and Russian (and by extension Soviet/Communist) without realizing that all of those groups viewed themselves as separate, not some magical happy family.

And yes, Phil DOES think Portuguese is the same as Spanish, because he thinks everything Latin is the same. Hell he probably thinks Spaniards (and Portuguese) are "POCs" because he is that lazy and stereotypical.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: if Phil really wants to insist on being Hispanic, I would personally donate to a fund to get him a DNA test. But, we know he would never release the results, as they would not line up with his delusions.

 

[Hux]

I've said it before and I'll say it again: if Phil really wants to insist on being Hispanic, I would personally donate to a fund to get him a DNA test. But, we know he would never release the results, as they would not line up with his delusions.

That and burning that money after wiping your ass with it is a far more worthwhile investment than donating to some overgrown sentient case of athlete's foot like him for any reason at all

 

[Tragi-Chan]

Did he ever outright say he was “transracial” like Rachel Dolezal, or simply deny being white and lie about his family origins when asked? (I did read through the subforum as a lurker back in the day but don’t recall him ever elaborating on his fake ethnicity.)

IIRC, the official story is that his mother is white, but his father is Puerto Rican. Phil claims to be white-passing, despite being paler than basically anyone.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Or a storage unit he slowly extracts shit from trip by trip with nothing but a backpack.

Phil used to do just that.

Remember the Backpack of Fail Phail?

It was full of books about bikes, binder(s) of drawings, probably various BDSM wear, and who knows what else.

 

[Sonichu-choo trainwreck]

Phil used to do just that.

Remember the Backpack of Fail Phail?

It was full of books about bikes, probably various BDSM gear, binder(s) of drawings, and who knows what else.

oh THAT kind of binder - I thought it was more BDSM ger at first.

books about bikes? he didn't learn anything about em apparently IIRC he got some shitty comfort-bike.
Thoe things are "well, I'm not going to ride it so I'm not going to get a good one" self-fulfilling prophecies

 

[ToroidalBoat]

books about bikes?

This was before Phil had the "daughter bike" - yet a time when he obsessed about bikes. Phil took pictures of other people's bikes (which I hear raised suspicion), had a "pet" bike lock, and got tattoos about bikes. It's also when he claimed he couldn't ride a bike until he got his balls removed, for some philthy reason.

 

[Coldgrip]

That being said, most actual Marxists I know would wipe the floor with him and tell to “get a job.” Hell, I think even Anarchists would do that.

Phil is the loser that got voted out of the Red and Black cafe. A spot where anarchist faggots hung out at and a guy o'd on heroin in the bathroom and the owner wouldn't let the cops in because 'Fuck rules and authority'. Specifically, the regulars got together, took a vote, and told Philthy to gtfo.

Let that sink in. Phil actually got a bunch of professed anarchists to sit down and actually make a rule.

That's how much of a fuck up Philip is.

This was before Phil had the "daughter bike" - yet a time when he obsessed about bikes. Phil took pictures of other people's bikes (which I hear raised suspicion), had a "pet" bike lock, and got tattoos about bikes. It's also when he claimed he couldn't ride a bike until he got his balls removed, for some philthy reason.

The Clitoral Dough tat will always be my favorite example of mangled spanish.

 

[Optimus Prime]

Phil used to do just that.

Remember the Backpack of Fail Phail?

It was full of books about bikes, binder(s) of drawings, probably various BDSM wear, and who knows what else.

Yeah, that's actually what I was referencing when Phil initially moved to Portland - he was going up and down the coast by Greyhound slowly emptying a storage container with a backpack.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

he was going up and down the coast by Greyhound slowly emptying a storage container with a backpack

I thought he was just bouncing and squeaking between the San Francisco Bay area and Portland because Phil.

Also remember when the bus got stranded and Phil phreaked out?

 

[Optimus Prime]

Also remember when the bus got stranded and Phil phreaked out?

It feels like I should but I don't.

 

[Disgruntled Pupper]

He once lost a fight to a literal potato some ween sent him while armed with a knife.

The real loser was the landlord whose counter Phil gouged and scratched as his uncoordinated tard stabs repeatedly missed the potato.

This is why you should always research your tenants and never fall for the sirens call of HUD/Section 8 bux.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

It feels like I should but I don't.

Here it is (I think).

No wait, this is it.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Angelo, Phil’s father has died.
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What?
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So looks like "Daddy Rape Day" is going to become a national holiday in Kiwiland and we'll have to mourn the day that Angelo died.

But he's in a better place now that his failure of a son can't get at him.