- Joined
- Mar 28, 2019
Douchey,
ya. But I don't think McFat has ever really pumped anything in her life, let alone gas. Incoming Vlog: Watch me pump the soap dispenser because COVID and why can't I wash this black off my hands?
Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.
- Thread starter PiggyPie
- Start date
ya. But I don't think McFat has ever really pumped anything in her life, let alone gas. Incoming Vlog: Watch me pump the soap dispenser because COVID and why can't I wash this black off my hands?
- Joined
- Feb 10, 2022
So she lives in New Jersey big deal
ETA: Apparently a shit ton of you dont know that drivers arent allowed to pump their own gas into their own car in New Jersey. People who drive their entire lives have never pumped gas. There are lots of people who have never pumped gas. Its not that shocking. And yes. I know she doesnt live in NJ...read the joke. jeez
Last edited:
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2018
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2018
This is why back in the day when people said Destiny downgraded with Dana I thought it was bullshit. Ambers face is fractionally better and she has more money but the personality, neediness refusal to do ANYTHING makes Dana a prize. Amber is so self focused and spoiled she doesn’t see it’s the small things in relationships that add up. Getting out of the car and getting your own junk means a lot when the driver is zipping all over town for you.
- Joined
- Feb 10, 2022
You know people in New Jersey arent allowed to pump their own gas right? Entire generations of people who drive cars and have never pumped their gas.
I know she doesnt live in New Jersey. are you that dense?
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2019
We're here to make up the discrepancy in thinking between her level and that of the average baboon. The gap is real. And large.
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2018
Yup. I also know that she's never lived there, nor Oregon, where it's the same. So stop making dumb statements and fucking lurk more. Or contribute something worthwhile to the conversation, newfag.
I'd ask if /you're/ that dense, but you've proven time and time again that you are. Now take the advice posted earlier in glorious glitter text and lurk more, faggot.
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2014
Man if I were you I would stop now.
- Joined
- Mar 6, 2022
Despite costing $139, she finally finds a dress she totally likes because of the three layers in the dress.
In previous Torrid hauls, the dresses were much stretchier and thinner that tightly clung to her skin - revealing her rolls underneath.
She loves this dress not for its pattern, but because it conceals her rolls with all the poofy layers and she doesn't have to constantly pinch the dress to make sure the rolls are hidden.
In previous Torrid hauls, the dresses were much stretchier and thinner that tightly clung to her skin - revealing her rolls underneath.
She loves this dress not for its pattern, but because it conceals her rolls with all the poofy layers and she doesn't have to constantly pinch the dress to make sure the rolls are hidden.
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2019
There are perfectly good human beings who drop dead every day, their deaths untimely and completely random. Yet this bitch continues to waddle the earth, grabbing fistfuls of Mother Nature's resources, gobbling them like orange chicken and shitting them out, or trampling them beneath her feet, their value destroyed, or simply rending them, unseen beyond their first appearance, unworn and ungraciously abandoned at a local Goodwill, or uneaten, and either thrown away or "donated" to the local homeless shelter. What a fucking waste.
road trip, renaming my cat, torrid try-on, & taste test(after an anxiety attack
Ang-zie-tee? Of course she eats right after one. DoctorLynn Medicine Woman knows exactly how crippling anxieties should be treated. After all, she does know more about nutrition than we do. I bet that attack burned as many as five calories as she bravely fought it off! As the saying goes, you gotta refill that well.
We open with Big Ham telling us how dark it in in the apartment because it's storming and you liiiidddeeerally don't see the sun. "SO!", she says perkily, as it is her favorite word to use to begin sentences. Since I'm bored as fuck, why don't we track her use of "so" tonight, to keep our mind off the nontent she's been delivering of late?
Time for a trip to the nonexistent shrink and then meet up "with a friend". Eric or Ricky? Probably Eric, since I doubt Rickey wants to be with Hamber on his own, without Eric's chatter filling up the dead air spaces.
Films her dainty hooves, Joaquin. To the car. That whole hundred days to walk a mile bullshit has gone down the memory hole, it seems.
SO!
SO!
Once again, hauling Twinkie along for the ride. She's curled up in a dog bed. WriterLynn, who has all the best words and who is amazingly skilled at narrative description, tells us poor Twinkie looks like a croissant. She's named after a food, why not describe in the language you love most, Hamber: food. She yammers at Twinkie in that stupid baby voice she does, and Twinkie just stares at her.
Also, you shouldn't just toss your dog in the back seat like that. They should be wearing a harness and be buckled in. Just like the people,,,in,,,the,,,car,,,oh....wait.
Can't wait for the "gf" to get that first ticket for a passenger in the front seat not wearing a seatbelt. But what does Big Ham care? It isn't like she's getting the ticket.
SO!
Oh, FFS. If I never hear the word "furbabies" again, it'll be too goddamned soon. We must have reached the "renaming the animals" portion of the show, while the "gf" is pumping the gas and will also be sent intto the wilds of the attached convenience store to wrestle a woolly mammoth, or at least pick up some jerky. And a Diet Coke, no doubt.
SO!
Going over - for the nth time - how Twinkie Storrrr got her name (already named when big Ham acquired her), how she named Rarity Grey, and blathers on about how she just couldn't come up with a (cute) middle name for Wasabi, although I'm a bit lost on how "Grey" is a cute middle name, but whatever, and how she thunk and thunk and thunk on it, finally(!) coming up with one: Dot. SO! it's Wasabi Dot? SO! And this is supposed to be cute? Spamber - hey, still waiting on another round of cooking with Spam that you're so "obsessed" with - thinks it is soooooo kayute, but this is going to mean nothing to anyone who has never seen your videos. She says it's because when Wasabi curls up to nap, he just looks like a dot. I can see it now: she'll be calling him Wasabi Dot Com before we know it.
SO!
Goes on to talk about some picture she obviously couldn't find where Wasabi was all curled up, ok, yeah, we get it. No explanation of why any of the animals needs a fucking middle name.
SO!
SO!
Hahahahahaha. What's our snack? Peppered jerky! SO! The "gf" also has jerky and a Monster energy drink. All that hosing down and wiping of Big Ham's ass requires tons of energy. Hamber says she usually gets a Diet Coke, but she got some fancy water bullshit instead. Or rather, the "GF" went in and got it all. Big Ham doesn't stir from the car unless a) there's food involved that they can't just drive into, mowing down other diners in the process, or b) the ride is over, because hauling her fat ass out of the car is almost as arduous as shoving her fat ass INTO the car. That's why she doesn't get out when they're getting gas or going to the PO or things of that nature, of course: it's difficult and uncomfortable ordeal getting back in. Waitaminnit here. What is this horseshit?
pH Balanced? WUUUUT? Hambrt, you know you should be drinkeen alkaline water so you don't get water brash from all the gallons of water you studiously drink every single day. What is this? Are you tryeen to give yourself heartburn? Use your brian, moran!
Video of Twinkie sleeping. Video of the road. They're on the interstate. The speed limit is 70 MPH. Looks like a sign says "Welcome to Tennessee". That same stupid royalty free music that sounds like chipmunks fucking.
Poof! We're back at the luxury apartment and she's wearing that hideous Betsy Whosit dress. They went to 5 Below, and Big Ham being Big Ham, she saw Kraft Mac & Cheese gummies. We have arrived at the taste test/excuse to eat candy portion of the program. She says she tried insects before (yes, we recall the fucking squealing in that vlog) so she, like kinda, like wanted to taste weird foods on her vlog, because she's just so gosh-darned quirky, you guise!
"Looks disgusting, sounds disgusting." WriterLynn, y'all. Make sure you mark these past nine years as a time you knew her when, because she's heading for a Pulitzer Prize and the Nobel Prize because her narratives are so deep and meaningful and her descriptives...well, what can one say other than brilliant?
She liiiidddeeerrralllly hates everything about is, and I'm looking at the box as she struggles to open it - where he fuck is the "gf", and why is she not opening this box forher princess girlfriend the person for whom she's caring? Toilet plugged again? Back to the box; it doesn't say anywhere on that box that the gummies taste like Mac & Cheese. I'm wondering why WriterLynn hasn't picked up on this. Writers tend to notice these little details in life, after all. Oh, I see. She's assuming they will taste like cheese. Oh, TastebudLynn. I thought you were out of your reading rut.
I looked it up and it costs anywhere from four to eight bucks for the box. According to one place that stocked it but is out of stick, these are "Tropical flavored gummies in the shape of macaroni". there you have it.
She holds the bag up so we can see what they look like, and she says, again, "Disgusting." There is no fucking way this bitch doesn't love Kraft Mac & Cheese. Zero. She finally gets the damn bag open, smells it, does her no-Oscars-ever level of surprise reactions that hearken back to the "surprise" birthday party.
"Wait, what? They smell sweet!" Yes, dumbass, because you can't sell someone gummies in odd flavors without warning them/putting it on the box somewhere.
No, I don't believe for one second she didn't know these were regular old candy gummies. We all know she isn't a trendsetter, but a trend follower. This crap has been on TikTok and YouTube. That's how she discovered them and decided to hop on that bandwagon. Let's go, Fatty, this is boring. Move it along.
Hamber claims this isn't going as planned, because she wanted them to be disgusting. Bitch, you won't even eat raw tomato or snow peas, don't pretend that if people had said these things tasted like mac & cheese that you would have tried them. She eats one and does that stupid smacking that she does in these vids. That does NOTHING you fat cunt.
"Wait, whuuut?
FFS, come ON. "Was I tricked?" Hearkens back to the Jenny Krrreggg mini-eta. "I feel like I'm being pranked." she said then, as she gushed over salad and microwaved cheeseburgers and everything else she ate then. Life does not HAVE to be a nonstop series of Groundhog Days, you know.
Goddamn, this is tedious. "Wait, WHAT?" There's no flavor on the box. Since she knows it's tropical flavored, she then starts rattling off tropical fruits, as if her wounded but holding out, single tastebud has the ability to really taste anything but garlic salt, onion powder, and pepper. Now we get the lip-smacking. That also does NOTHING, you useless douche. Yes, go have your "gf" try one. "GF" gives it 8/10, supposedly asks the rhetorical question "Why is this so good?" BECAUSE IT"S JUST FUCKING SUGAR, YOU BRAINLESS TWATS.
No ang-zi-tee attack shown anywhere. Gonna have to ding you for clickbait/false advertising.
SO!
Thank fuck we've moved on. To the Torrid portion of the show, where Big Ham squeezes her extra-fat ass into too-small clothing. I feel as if I'm waiting for a monstrous pain to pierce my eyeballs and drive into my brain with the force of a supernova; a giant star making one last gargantuan effort to obliterate all the celestial objects it has encountered over its lifespan, flaring out and then going dark and silent, to join its brethren in solitude, floating through the universe, helpless,
That is a descriptive passage, WriterLynn. If you read books instead of just listening to them, you might actually learn a thing or two.
SO!
JFC. Shows us the current bag she's pulling shit out of, then holds up another bag of Torrid crap, promising us the torture will continue once the current bag has been emptied. Claims she's enjoyed doing this one article of clothing at a time shit, because it's like a new gift each time! They aren't gifts, idiot. You bought the shit yourself. You know what's in the bag. You just like amassing a horde of bullshit that you'll never use or wear, until there's no more room to put newer shit, at which point, it's another vlog, about how you're so giveen that you're going to dump another couple bags of crap at Goodwill. Lather, rinse, repeat.
We're over the halfway point. It's all downhill from here. As always.
She pulls out a dress with roses on it, but even from a short distance, it looks like what came out of her dainty period hole when she was free bleeding everywhere. Close up, it looks like what a trailer park Grandma from the holler would call her city dress, From those rare nights out on the town to funerals and every dressup function in between, this $139.50 dress will allow you to go in style and dignity. Does the stupid, trite "let's try this on" editing thing and hilarity ensues. It's obviously far too tight and just as obvious, as always, that she should have gone to a 6, but I'm sure GrandmaLynn knows far more about haute couture than we do.
Hamber acknowledges it is tight right below her pumped up fake tits, claims if it weren't for her "weight loss" she wouldn't be able to wear it at all. You know what that sounds like to me, LiarLynn? Sounds to me like stupid. You knowingly buy clothes you know are going to be tight and ill-fitting. You may think you're a dainty, fairy-like princess, but you are a giant, horribly proportioned ogre, Stop buying shit that doesn't fit. It looks terrible on her, as these things generally do. Oh dear. Another goal: by the end of the year, she gasps out, struggling to take a breath against the unyielding fabric of the dress, she wants to wear this and be able to breathe. No one is going to take the over on that bet, Fatty. It's a sucker bet. This will go as well as the walk a mile in a hundred days goal; nowhere. Here's a thought, Hamber, an idea I'll give you for free: put that fucker on just under your diaphragm. Maybe you'll not be able to stuff so much shit down your piehole. We'll likely never see this dress again until it's being thrown in a plastic bag to get it out of the apartment.
Big Ham is now showing us the dress has three layers, and she's trying desperately to describe them, but hypoxia is beginning to establish a foothold. Better speed through this portion, Spamber, if you don't want to pass out - and forget about the "gf" catching you when you teeter over like a giant redwood being felled. She may have thrown discus and hammer at Delaware, but she seems marginally smarter than you, and catching 500+ pounds of dead weight alone is a good way to get crushed. That "poofy" layer is called a crinoline. You're welcome. Would hate like hell for you to overexert yourself by taking ten seconds to google that.
Hamber gives the dress a 10/10, but on her, a 9.5/10. How humble you are, Big Ham. Truly. you are the exact kind of role model so needed in these trying times.
Time to weigh Twinkie Storr. Goal is ten pounds, she's at 12. gained weight. Guess Hamber got jealous because of how effortlessly Twinkie was losing weight.
Wonderful, a tour of a fucking litter box. Who cares?
PointerLynn is back, updating us on their growing of the food "moment", It isn't a moment, and that isn't food. It's herbs.
SO!
Video abruptly cuts to a card, telling us they were making the bed when Rarity jumped under the sheets. Why she couldn't just tell us this is a mystery that will never be solved, because we don't understand film directing like she does. Babbles at Rarity in that stupid baby voice, as if in all the years she's had cats, she has never seen this behavior. Thank fuck we're down to the last ten seconds of this shit.
Rarity jumps down off the bed and hal-le-fuckin-lu-yuh, the "thanks for watching end card comes up and we are d-u-n done.
TL;DW/R: A mysterious "road trip" to what looks to have been TN. No mention of bags packed, so day tripping, apparently. It's all shrouded in obscurity, as if Big Ham is some kind of super spy. Tells us about naming her pets. Anything to pad out the video, I suppose. A no ang-zie-tee anything before she ate candy - false advertising! Somehow squeezed herself into a dress that was constricting her ability to take deep breaths. Twinkie is gaining weight because her owner is jealous of Twinkie's weightloss and is also stupid. A litter box tour, and Rarity doing a cat thing. Spamber continues to spend money on crap she doesn't need even through her views are circling the drain in the shitter.
Consider yourself fortunate you didn't subject yourself to this. It kills brain cells better than mad cow disease.
Number of times Big Ham used "SO!" to start a sentence: 14. That is one "SO!" every .64 minutes of this 9 minute vlog.
Late edit, sober: typo hell, except the one that's deliberate. Don't post drunk, kids!
road trip, renaming my cat, torrid try-on, & taste test(after an anxiety attack 
) | vlog - June 9, 2022
Ang-zie-tee? Of course she eats right after one. DoctorLynn Medicine Woman knows exactly how crippling anxieties should be treated. After all, she does know more about nutrition than we do. I bet that attack burned as many as five calories as she bravely fought it off! As the saying goes, you gotta refill that well.
We open with Big Ham telling us how dark it in in the apartment because it's storming and you liiiidddeeerally don't see the sun. "SO!", she says perkily, as it is her favorite word to use to begin sentences. Since I'm bored as fuck, why don't we track her use of "so" tonight, to keep our mind off the nontent she's been delivering of late?
Time for a trip to the nonexistent shrink and then meet up "with a friend". Eric or Ricky? Probably Eric, since I doubt Rickey wants to be with Hamber on his own, without Eric's chatter filling up the dead air spaces.
Films her dainty hooves, Joaquin. To the car. That whole hundred days to walk a mile bullshit has gone down the memory hole, it seems.
SO!
SO!
Once again, hauling Twinkie along for the ride. She's curled up in a dog bed. WriterLynn, who has all the best words and who is amazingly skilled at narrative description, tells us poor Twinkie looks like a croissant. She's named after a food, why not describe in the language you love most, Hamber: food. She yammers at Twinkie in that stupid baby voice she does, and Twinkie just stares at her.
Also, you shouldn't just toss your dog in the back seat like that. They should be wearing a harness and be buckled in. Just like the people,,,in,,,the,,,car,,,oh....wait.
Can't wait for the "gf" to get that first ticket for a passenger in the front seat not wearing a seatbelt. But what does Big Ham care? It isn't like she's getting the ticket.
SO!
Oh, FFS. If I never hear the word "furbabies" again, it'll be too goddamned soon. We must have reached the "renaming the animals" portion of the show, while the "gf" is pumping the gas and will also be sent intto the wilds of the attached convenience store to wrestle a woolly mammoth, or at least pick up some jerky. And a Diet Coke, no doubt.
SO!
Going over - for the nth time - how Twinkie Storrrr got her name (already named when big Ham acquired her), how she named Rarity Grey, and blathers on about how she just couldn't come up with a (cute) middle name for Wasabi, although I'm a bit lost on how "Grey" is a cute middle name, but whatever, and how she thunk and thunk and thunk on it, finally(!) coming up with one: Dot. SO! it's Wasabi Dot? SO! And this is supposed to be cute? Spamber - hey, still waiting on another round of cooking with Spam that you're so "obsessed" with - thinks it is soooooo kayute, but this is going to mean nothing to anyone who has never seen your videos. She says it's because when Wasabi curls up to nap, he just looks like a dot. I can see it now: she'll be calling him Wasabi Dot Com before we know it.
SO!
Goes on to talk about some picture she obviously couldn't find where Wasabi was all curled up, ok, yeah, we get it. No explanation of why any of the animals needs a fucking middle name.
SO!
SO!
Hahahahahaha. What's our snack? Peppered jerky! SO! The "gf" also has jerky and a Monster energy drink. All that hosing down and wiping of Big Ham's ass requires tons of energy. Hamber says she usually gets a Diet Coke, but she got some fancy water bullshit instead. Or rather, the "GF" went in and got it all. Big Ham doesn't stir from the car unless a) there's food involved that they can't just drive into, mowing down other diners in the process, or b) the ride is over, because hauling her fat ass out of the car is almost as arduous as shoving her fat ass INTO the car. That's why she doesn't get out when they're getting gas or going to the PO or things of that nature, of course: it's difficult and uncomfortable ordeal getting back in. Waitaminnit here. What is this horseshit?
pH Balanced? WUUUUT? Hambrt, you know you should be drinkeen alkaline water so you don't get water brash from all the gallons of water you studiously drink every single day. What is this? Are you tryeen to give yourself heartburn? Use your brian, moran!
Video of Twinkie sleeping. Video of the road. They're on the interstate. The speed limit is 70 MPH. Looks like a sign says "Welcome to Tennessee". That same stupid royalty free music that sounds like chipmunks fucking.
Poof! We're back at the luxury apartment and she's wearing that hideous Betsy Whosit dress. They went to 5 Below, and Big Ham being Big Ham, she saw Kraft Mac & Cheese gummies. We have arrived at the taste test/excuse to eat candy portion of the program. She says she tried insects before (yes, we recall the fucking squealing in that vlog) so she, like kinda, like wanted to taste weird foods on her vlog, because she's just so gosh-darned quirky, you guise!
"Looks disgusting, sounds disgusting." WriterLynn, y'all. Make sure you mark these past nine years as a time you knew her when, because she's heading for a Pulitzer Prize and the Nobel Prize because her narratives are so deep and meaningful and her descriptives...well, what can one say other than brilliant?
She liiiidddeeerrralllly hates everything about is, and I'm looking at the box as she struggles to open it - where he fuck is the "gf", and why is she not opening this box for
I looked it up and it costs anywhere from four to eight bucks for the box. According to one place that stocked it but is out of stick, these are "Tropical flavored gummies in the shape of macaroni". there you have it.
She holds the bag up so we can see what they look like, and she says, again, "Disgusting." There is no fucking way this bitch doesn't love Kraft Mac & Cheese. Zero. She finally gets the damn bag open, smells it, does her no-Oscars-ever level of surprise reactions that hearken back to the "surprise" birthday party.
"Wait, what? They smell sweet!" Yes, dumbass, because you can't sell someone gummies in odd flavors without warning them/putting it on the box somewhere.
No, I don't believe for one second she didn't know these were regular old candy gummies. We all know she isn't a trendsetter, but a trend follower. This crap has been on TikTok and YouTube. That's how she discovered them and decided to hop on that bandwagon. Let's go, Fatty, this is boring. Move it along.
Hamber claims this isn't going as planned, because she wanted them to be disgusting. Bitch, you won't even eat raw tomato or snow peas, don't pretend that if people had said these things tasted like mac & cheese that you would have tried them. She eats one and does that stupid smacking that she does in these vids. That does NOTHING you fat cunt.
"Wait, whuuut?
FFS, come ON. "Was I tricked?" Hearkens back to the Jenny Krrreggg mini-eta. "I feel like I'm being pranked." she said then, as she gushed over salad and microwaved cheeseburgers and everything else she ate then. Life does not HAVE to be a nonstop series of Groundhog Days, you know.
Goddamn, this is tedious. "Wait, WHAT?" There's no flavor on the box. Since she knows it's tropical flavored, she then starts rattling off tropical fruits, as if her wounded but holding out, single tastebud has the ability to really taste anything but garlic salt, onion powder, and pepper. Now we get the lip-smacking. That also does NOTHING, you useless douche. Yes, go have your "gf" try one. "GF" gives it 8/10, supposedly asks the rhetorical question "Why is this so good?" BECAUSE IT"S JUST FUCKING SUGAR, YOU BRAINLESS TWATS.
No ang-zi-tee attack shown anywhere. Gonna have to ding you for clickbait/false advertising.
SO!
Thank fuck we've moved on. To the Torrid portion of the show, where Big Ham squeezes her extra-fat ass into too-small clothing. I feel as if I'm waiting for a monstrous pain to pierce my eyeballs and drive into my brain with the force of a supernova; a giant star making one last gargantuan effort to obliterate all the celestial objects it has encountered over its lifespan, flaring out and then going dark and silent, to join its brethren in solitude, floating through the universe, helpless,
That is a descriptive passage, WriterLynn. If you read books instead of just listening to them, you might actually learn a thing or two.
SO!
JFC. Shows us the current bag she's pulling shit out of, then holds up another bag of Torrid crap, promising us the torture will continue once the current bag has been emptied. Claims she's enjoyed doing this one article of clothing at a time shit, because it's like a new gift each time! They aren't gifts, idiot. You bought the shit yourself. You know what's in the bag. You just like amassing a horde of bullshit that you'll never use or wear, until there's no more room to put newer shit, at which point, it's another vlog, about how you're so giveen that you're going to dump another couple bags of crap at Goodwill. Lather, rinse, repeat.
We're over the halfway point. It's all downhill from here. As always.
She pulls out a dress with roses on it, but even from a short distance, it looks like what came out of her dainty period hole when she was free bleeding everywhere. Close up, it looks like what a trailer park Grandma from the holler would call her city dress, From those rare nights out on the town to funerals and every dressup function in between, this $139.50 dress will allow you to go in style and dignity. Does the stupid, trite "let's try this on" editing thing and hilarity ensues. It's obviously far too tight and just as obvious, as always, that she should have gone to a 6, but I'm sure GrandmaLynn knows far more about haute couture than we do.
Hamber acknowledges it is tight right below her pumped up fake tits, claims if it weren't for her "weight loss" she wouldn't be able to wear it at all. You know what that sounds like to me, LiarLynn? Sounds to me like stupid. You knowingly buy clothes you know are going to be tight and ill-fitting. You may think you're a dainty, fairy-like princess, but you are a giant, horribly proportioned ogre, Stop buying shit that doesn't fit. It looks terrible on her, as these things generally do. Oh dear. Another goal: by the end of the year, she gasps out, struggling to take a breath against the unyielding fabric of the dress, she wants to wear this and be able to breathe. No one is going to take the over on that bet, Fatty. It's a sucker bet. This will go as well as the walk a mile in a hundred days goal; nowhere. Here's a thought, Hamber, an idea I'll give you for free: put that fucker on just under your diaphragm. Maybe you'll not be able to stuff so much shit down your piehole. We'll likely never see this dress again until it's being thrown in a plastic bag to get it out of the apartment.
Big Ham is now showing us the dress has three layers, and she's trying desperately to describe them, but hypoxia is beginning to establish a foothold. Better speed through this portion, Spamber, if you don't want to pass out - and forget about the "gf" catching you when you teeter over like a giant redwood being felled. She may have thrown discus and hammer at Delaware, but she seems marginally smarter than you, and catching 500+ pounds of dead weight alone is a good way to get crushed. That "poofy" layer is called a crinoline. You're welcome. Would hate like hell for you to overexert yourself by taking ten seconds to google that.
Hamber gives the dress a 10/10, but on her, a 9.5/10. How humble you are, Big Ham. Truly. you are the exact kind of role model so needed in these trying times.
Time to weigh Twinkie Storr. Goal is ten pounds, she's at 12. gained weight. Guess Hamber got jealous because of how effortlessly Twinkie was losing weight.
Wonderful, a tour of a fucking litter box. Who cares?
PointerLynn is back, updating us on their growing of the food "moment", It isn't a moment, and that isn't food. It's herbs.
SO!
Video abruptly cuts to a card, telling us they were making the bed when Rarity jumped under the sheets. Why she couldn't just tell us this is a mystery that will never be solved, because we don't understand film directing like she does. Babbles at Rarity in that stupid baby voice, as if in all the years she's had cats, she has never seen this behavior. Thank fuck we're down to the last ten seconds of this shit.
Rarity jumps down off the bed and hal-le-fuckin-lu-yuh, the "thanks for watching end card comes up and we are d-u-n done.
TL;DW/R: A mysterious "road trip" to what looks to have been TN. No mention of bags packed, so day tripping, apparently. It's all shrouded in obscurity, as if Big Ham is some kind of super spy. Tells us about naming her pets. Anything to pad out the video, I suppose. A no ang-zie-tee anything before she ate candy - false advertising! Somehow squeezed herself into a dress that was constricting her ability to take deep breaths. Twinkie is gaining weight because her owner is jealous of Twinkie's weightloss and is also stupid. A litter box tour, and Rarity doing a cat thing. Spamber continues to spend money on crap she doesn't need even through her views are circling the drain in the shitter.
Consider yourself fortunate you didn't subject yourself to this. It kills brain cells better than mad cow disease.
Number of times Big Ham used "SO!" to start a sentence: 14. That is one "SO!" every .64 minutes of this 9 minute vlog.
Late edit, sober: typo hell, except the one that's deliberate. Don't post drunk, kids!
Last edited:
- Joined
- Apr 6, 2019
She’s in Berea, KY. The first sign says KY Center for the Arts which is located there. Sorry, I screwed up the second SS, but you get the point.
Someone in the Amberverse used to live in Berea, and I think it was Dana & Destiny.
FupaCitySheriff
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 28, 2020
Saw the first bit of this utter shit via Bottle's channel. Nothing in her videos is remotely interesting or entertaining. She's a 500/600 pound unwashed, uneducated hog, who cannot tell the truth...
She's off to a PSYCHIATRIST's appointment. Which is strange, seeing as in her last video, she was so happy to be keeping her current PSYCHOLOGIST - who strangely enough was working as a THERAPIST. But at least it solves the problem of her getting the blood work she needed doing for her new PSYCHOLOGIST.
Bitch, that's not how it works.
a) if the problem is complex enough, you see a PSYCHIATRIST
b) who then decides the best course of action, whether that be
c) to continue seeing them (very rarely, unless you have been sectioned)
d) stepped over to a PSYCHOLOGIST, who can usually devote more time to your problem
e) stepped over to a THERAPIST or the like, for example someone who specializes in CBT
f) stepped over to a support group, to help with the problem
As I've written, most people get either 1 or 2 appointments with a PSYCHIATRIST. Unless you're certifiable and need admission to a mental facility, for 24 hour , 7 days a week observation, you will be passed along the line of psychological help. No way would this hog be prepared to keep her many mental illness lies going and be locked up for public safety - that would stop her eating as much as she wants.
Everything she does is a performance. Everything she says is a lie.
How is the walking going? How is the dieting going? Bitch, we already know.
She's off to a PSYCHIATRIST's appointment. Which is strange, seeing as in her last video, she was so happy to be keeping her current PSYCHOLOGIST - who strangely enough was working as a THERAPIST. But at least it solves the problem of her getting the blood work she needed doing for her new PSYCHOLOGIST.
Bitch, that's not how it works.
a) if the problem is complex enough, you see a PSYCHIATRIST
b) who then decides the best course of action, whether that be
c) to continue seeing them (very rarely, unless you have been sectioned)
d) stepped over to a PSYCHOLOGIST, who can usually devote more time to your problem
e) stepped over to a THERAPIST or the like, for example someone who specializes in CBT
f) stepped over to a support group, to help with the problem
As I've written, most people get either 1 or 2 appointments with a PSYCHIATRIST. Unless you're certifiable and need admission to a mental facility, for 24 hour , 7 days a week observation, you will be passed along the line of psychological help. No way would this hog be prepared to keep her many mental illness lies going and be locked up for public safety - that would stop her eating as much as she wants.
Everything she does is a performance. Everything she says is a lie.
How is the walking going? How is the dieting going? Bitch, we already know.
vlcsr
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2021
A psychiatrist is an MD, a psychologist is a PhD. That’s the difference.
I believe Amber has seen a psychiatrist in the past to prescribe her medication.
Pretty funny video on how nickocado basically stole his gig from amber and makes fun of her lmao.
groovypeach
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2021
if youre so smart you do it, fag.
- Joined
- May 3, 2021
Does anyone know what kind of car ALR bought for Wipey?
Bigbadyeet
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Apr 5, 2022
Mazda CX-5 with Red interior I believe
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2019
Thanks for the clarification! I was trying to stop the on the road portion to read the signs, and actually thought for about three seconds about pulling it into Premiere to see all the signs, but then had another drink and said, nah. That drink also explains the hideous number of typos up there. Sorry, fam.
I just cannot wrap my head around sitting in my apartment all day, every day, ordering shit online and sending my "gf" out to pick up our takeout meals even though we have enough food in the house to sustain us for a month. Then, when I'm not sitting on my ass ordering shit, I go to brick and mortar stores to touch everything and buy even more shit in person. Where else do I go? Oh, buff-fetts, to shovel food in my face, even though I'm on a diet, Libraries? Bah. The movies? Nah. Hiking trails? As if. Historical sites? Pfft, wtf do I care about history. Swimming? Crazy. Joaquin? Plateaued at .6 of a mile, so that's impossible.
So you see, I guess now I understand Big Ham completely!
Turd Fergusson
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 28, 2019
I am presently in Dublin, Ireland, for the weekend. [small PL]. This remind me of what would Amber do if she won a trip to Ireland. Would she even know where Ireland is? Does she know what the Book of Kells is? If asked, she would probably tell us that she read it and “It shooked her to the core”. One thing I noticed, that while there are obese people in Dublin like in most western countries, someone of Amber’s girth is never seen. She could not walk in ballet slippers on cobblestones and uneven stairs, most stores do not have mobility scooters, and most interesting things are historical in nature. What would she do? She would sit in her hotel room ordering food till she left the country, having seen absolutely nothing. Every trip destinations would be the same, Bora Bora, Greece, etc. Amber has no interest in travelling, I hope Jade does not expect to do a lot of it with her “gf”.
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2017
Hi, Boogie2988, nice to see you on the farms and have managed to do more than just habitually read your own thread and cry about it over some pills. That said, if you have to explain the joke it's not funny. We've told you that many times faggot.