Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

[Boolean Bitch]

25 pound weight gain in a month in a half. Sadly, I don’t even think that’s a record for her....

I don't even think it's a record for this YEAR. Didn't she gain over 30 lbs in a month WHILE ON OZEMPIC when she twisted her ankle this past summer?

...This is so dumb, she is going to go down this virtue path claiming she is an addict, I can feel it. Yet she chooses thumbnails etc that exploit that especially but Youtube chooses them right?!...

Especially dumb as there is nothing virtuous about being in active addiction AT ALL, and especially with no meaningful actions for recovery. That puts you somewhere on a spectrum between between a pitiful individual squandering their life, and a blight on society (like individuals such as Andy Dick). The constantly exploiting it while constantly shaming her audience for feeling uncomfortable with that keeps nudging her closer and closer to the Andy Dick side.

Not only that but he acted surprised while remarking "this seems like it was written by a well educated, intelligent person" (paraphrase). Which implies that we're all not only evil but also fucking idiots. I'm an idiot myself, but the point still stands. They use us for information all the time for a reason. It's not necessarily because of our intelligence (the mentals kind), but we are good at what we do. Sometimes we want to shitpost about how Amberlynn's life is like Plato's cave because it's funny and accurate to us. That and it gives us something to do as we hope in vain that Amber will be funny again...

That was really cringe and gross. "Highly intelligent and highly educated" MY ASS. That's many of youse-guys here, but I'm just a pleb with a library card and access to Google. I read it, I didn't DISCOVER this shit. I had interpreted that whole part as something along the lines of "FINALLY! Something on Kiwi Farms that I can MAKE MONEY off of without YouTube slapping my pee-pee and demonitizing me".

To jade,

Roses are red.
Voilets are blue.
I took a massive cow shit
and lost five pounds for you.

-Love, Amberlynn (probably)

Please no boolie, it's the best I can do, but has to be better than Amber's poetry, right?

Oh my GAH, that's SO #gorlfriendgoals!

....I kinda wanna color that big cardboard house....

One time we were visiting friends who had, as Diet Coke 4 Life would call it, a slightly larger than average goblin infestation. They had also recently purchased a new appliance and still had the box. We made a playhouse out of it, using brown craft paper and various colours of construction paper to cover it in pretend bricks and a pretend wooden door, shingles, windows, the whole shebang. It was SUCH A BLAST!

And this is yet another thing that is so pathetic about Amber. Adults can revisit and relive their childhood. The way to do that is by socializing with kids - either your own goobery-nosed tiny people, or those from your friends and family (family of origin OR family of choice). Instead of buying and hoarding ridiculous piles of trinkets, you introduce them to the things that were around from your childhood. OR, you let them teach you about the things that THEY currently play with ... Except LOL Dolls! Those things are freaking creepy and I SWEAR I saw one move on it's own once. Uh, anyway, it's just baffling how many things she does ABSOLUTELY WRONG. With the law of averages, you'd figure by now she'd have accidentally stumbled on the right course of action at least ONCE by now.

JFC her upper arm looks like Tammy SlatonView attachment 4093887

Rich Piana be rolling over in his grave, jealous of those gains!

 

[Constellationzero]

Don't forget the relentless cackling.

* This SLAPS!
* Ai did that--Aii did that!

 

[lol cow supreme]

I've said it before. She had to quit diets, or whatever, cus 2-5 pounds lost in a week is too much and dangerous! Yet, she puts on a pound a day.

Some of you know I like to put up the math.... A pound of fat is 3500 calories.

To gain a pound in 1 day, you would need to exceed your required calories by 3500. And that's at 100% efficiency, which no one is at.
She is bigger than a regular human. To maintain just 400 pounds of sedientary body weight she would need to eat 2550 calories. With NO activity if she only ate 2550 calories every day at her height she would eventually "settle" down to 400 pounds.

This is an under estimate. She is consuming 6,050 calories a day on average to average a 1 pound weight gain per day.

Give or take, a Chicken Burrito from chipotle is 800-1000 calories. She's eating the equivalent of 6-8 of them a day.

No lypodema. Its thermodynamics. You still need the calories to make the fat to go into the lypodema.

Calorie calculator

Calculate the number of calories you need a day to maintain your weight.

www.mayoclinic.org

 

[Suspicious Activity]

Perhaps we could do with a list of affectations and traits that Amber has assimilated from F,JFofNY,MG,W? I‘ll start:

• Drinking coffee
• slightly lower voice pitch when she remembers.
• Calling inanimate objects ’she’ or ‘he’ instead of ‘it’
• sudden need to own an ‘office’ to ‘work’ in
• pretending to like poke bowls and broccoli.
• Her straight hair suddenly has frizz problems
• ”bayybbee”

 

[My Cat Is Racist]

* This SLAPS!
* Ai did that--Aii did that!

"Skinny people <insert shit that only happens to fat people> too"

 

[Bitch I eat people]

Her "omg" face makes her look like those LOL dolls

 

[Miltank]

I've said it before. She had to quit diets, or whatever, cus 2-5 pounds lost in a week is too much and dangerous! Yet, she puts on a pound a day.

Some of you know I like to put up the math.... A pound of fat is 3500 calories.

To gain a pound in 1 day, you would need to exceed your required calories by 3500. And that's at 100% efficiency, which no one is at.
She is bigger than a regular human. To maintain just 400 pounds of sedientary body weight she would need to eat 2550 calories. With NO activity if she only ate 2550 calories every day at her height she would eventually "settle" down to 400 pounds.

This is an under estimate. She is consuming 6,050 calories a day on average to average a 1 pound weight gain per day.

Give or take, a Chicken Burrito from chipotle is 800-1000 calories. She's eating the equivalent of 6-8 of them a day.

No lypodema. Its thermodynamics. You still need the calories to make the fat to go into the lypodema.

Calorie calculator

Calculate the number of calories you need a day to maintain your weight.

www.mayoclinic.org

tho she is at 521, which her sedentary BMR is at 3,656, so she'd have to be consuming over 7000 calories a day to gain a lb a day. And out of curiosity i punched in what Al would probably get on her burrito at chipotle and it came out to over 1,300 calories for one chicken burrito! insanity, but just a small snack for our gorl.

 

[Trees]

Oh my pet (get it) peeve is definitely when Amber gushes over how all the animals in the house are so obsessed with her.

They're the real captives.

 

[FatalTater]

she'd have to be consuming over 7000 calories a day to gain a lb a day

IN THIS ECONOMY?!

 

[Bibbity Bobbity]

Pet peeves:

Lipedema made me order all this take out!

WW makes me binge.

I'm putting myself out on the internet with questionable taste and smarts, and don't you dare comment. (But Becky could stand to lose a little weight.)

Turning the Christmas spirit into gimme, gimme, gimme.

 

[Diet Coke 4 Life]

Pet peeve:

Her talking.

That's the post.

 

[caffeinated_pirate]

The eye rolling into the back of her head whenever she eats.

Drives me insane.

Edit: thought of another one!

When she does ‘taste tests’ of normal ass shit.

Lemme taste test this banana snack! Lemme taste test this specific salad with this specific dressing I haven’t combined yet! Bitch it’s not a taste test, you know those damn flavors.

 

[Slappy McGherkin]

Pet peeves:

She exists and funds her whole lifestyle on this.

<mic drop>

 

[Chilli Soup]

The thing that's annoying me the most lately is how damn boring she is. I haven't watched her/reactions since early Vlogmas.

 

[Diet Coke 4 Life]

come to target with me, christmas tree competition, & fridge for the office | | vlogmas day 17

Archive so you don't have to give this bint clicks.

 

[FatalTater]

When she does ‘taste tests’ of normal ass shit.

Lemme taste test this banana snack! Lemme taste test this specific salad with this specific dressing I haven’t combined yet! Bitch it’s not a taste test, you know those damn flavors.

But she's so nervous right now! Here we go... *cronch* ... ... ... MMM! You guys! This is actually like, so good.

 

[Simon]

Pet peeves:

Lipedema made me order all this take out!

WW makes me binge.

I'm putting myself out on the internet with questionable taste and smarts, and don't you dare comment. (But Becky could stand to lose a little weight.)

Turning the Christmas spirit into gimme, gimme, gimme.

Allllll the fucking fatties with lipedema/lymphedema use it as an excuse to just eat anything and everything and be deathfat status by 30. They always say they've talked to doctors and researched but never seem to understand that being a fucking whale makes it worse.

 

[notfoodienotbeauty]

Did she really buy another fridge so she didn't have to walk the 10 feet to the kitchen?

 

[ExplodedWhale]

I just got done watching the vlogmas day 16, so I apologize if I'm late, but jfc. Being in a relationship with Amber seems so emotionally draining it almost makes me feel bad for Jade, Lmao. (I don't but almost).
Just the fact that they're around each other 24/7 on top of the fact that they even share a notebook, not to mention the fact that Jade had to hold her after Amber chose to 'binge' lol.


I think it's finally happened, I think our Ambie gorl has finally found a parasite Sadly it's not one of those parasites that make you lose weight.



Her obsession with her inner child and childhood doesn't sound healthy either.

I'm aware that it's a valid thing to discuss when you're in therapy, but it's just an excuse for everything.



She's obviously not dealing with that stuff in therapy because any therapy should know to end the session by teaching the patient to 'close that book' until next appointment. (I hope I made sense because I don't know how else to explain this without powerleveling)


It's almost nauseating.


Tbh i think there's some addicts that just die, they don't hit rock bottom. And she's just convinced herself that she's climbing out of this hole but she's just digging deeper. I think she's gonna be that type.

She's never gonna get married and she's never gonna even leave Kentucky. It's kinda sad but then it really isn't.


I think this may be a very niche person, but there was a YouTuber I watched a long time ago- like 2011- and her YT was NanaLuvsTroubles. And she was like 500+ pounds and bedbound, had to get a leg removed but she had a pretty active channel. I remember her uploading a video about her leg.

and then one day she just stopped posting because she died.

And I feel like that's gonna be Amber.

 

[FatalTater]

AdultBabyLynn is getting desperate. There's a hoof sighting about halfway in.