Hey Guize! Welcome to a new vlog. I'm low energy today. Blah blah blah, sad, breakup, etc. Is everything still just looking like a line segment? (1D)
Ambersplaining editing on her iPhone. Amber edits out at least half of everything she films for her vlogs. Amber complains about how long the process is to upload and such, as if it's work that she has to do. So what? The other day it took 2 hours to download something due to a crappy internet connection. I didn't have to do anything for those 2 hours except make sure the computer didn't get unplugged. Stop trying to make this sound hard.
Proof YouTube is easy: If it was actually difficult, Amber wouldn't be able to do it because she's an absolute TARD. Moving on.
JUMPCUT!!! Panda Express. Amber usually gets the 3 'meats' +rice/noodle, but today just got noodles with 1 side of fried brown lumps (and an ayyyg roll) because she's pretending to be dainty (we know she'll just order more DoorDash in an hour).
FREEZE FRAME!!
(I totally didn't mean to inflict that on you. I dropped something off my desk, and clicked pause without looking at the screen to climb under my desk to retrieve it. I resurfaced to find this waiting for me)
Amber's delicate palate determines that what this Chinese takeaway needs IS MORE SALT.
JUMPCUT!! Showing the dishwasher full of dishes to prove to the Kiwi-haydurs that she isn't too fat to open and load the dishwasher.
Amber washes the dishes, then uses the dishwasher to dry them. Montage of putting away dishes. Diet Pepsi break to quench thirst due to working so hard from clearing the dishwasher.
JUMPCUT!! CLOSET CLEANOUT TIME: Amber discards: a tarp.
JUMPCUT!! Scrolling TikTok trash. An opportunity for Amber to feign empathy! [SKIP]
JUMPCUT!! Just woke up from a nap. Yellow blanket is still on the couch, and you can see Twinkie sleeping on it at 4:21 (1/3). Complains of not sleeping well and it being the result of heartbreak... and not at all from her poor diet and constant Delta 8 consumption.
Delta 8 normally gives her 'massive munchies' but not so much over the last few days. And of course she's mentioning this, because The Farms and reaction channels have been playing that clip of her where she admitted that these gummies gave her the munchies to the point where she was able to binge while on Ozempic.
GREAT! She's gone from eating enough for 5 women to eating enough for 3-4 women! It's called BABY-STEPS YOU HAYDURZ!! Yeah, munchies vs no munchies is irrelvant as she has proven that hunger isn't what drives her to eat.
JUMPCUT!! Boiling cauldron of vomit, which Amber declares to be some sort of soup. Amber's been craving broth, so instead of heating up some bone broth to drink, she prepares:
That's pretty chuny for broth... or vomit.
QUESTION TIME!! Should 300lb+ people be allowed to do mukbongs? Amber says Yes! It would be descrimination otherwise. If they demonetized a fatty who was killing themselves with food, "they'd have a massive descrimination case on their hands". I would ask Amber if she also feels that it's descrimination to not allow a convicted chomo to work at a daycare, but knowing Amber, she'd probably say yes (and then defend her stance from a point of authority from being a "child SA victim").
Yes, Amber, and alcoholics should also be allowed to monetize binge drinking (/sarcasm). FUCK. OFF. Either your "food addiction" is in the same category as alcohol and drug use and shouldn't be monetized, or it's in a lesser category and you deserve NO SYMPATHY and just need to grow the fuck up and put the fork down.
Hey, funny thing I noticed. Amber uploaded her pretending to be high on Delta 8 video, and everything was fine. Bottle did a react to it, but the REACT got hit with an age restriction.
"That's like saying only certain people can drink alcohol on camera... who cares?" Holy FUCK, I didn't think she was thick enough to defend alcoholics drinking on camera. NORMAL HUMANS BEINGS
would care about the difference between a healthy and unaddicted person taking a sip on camera, vs a person who is dying from alcoholism making the money to drink themselves to death by monetizing videos of themselves drinking themselves to death. Amber, being the child of junkies with addictions of her own, doesn't want to acknowledge the difference.
Amber has gone back and forth with this in her head several times, but this is where she is on the topic now... because monetizing her addiction on YouTube gives her an easy way to feed her addictions without having to beg or *gasp* work a real job to afford her vices.
JUMPCUT!! Amber inserts a clip from a 'skinny mookbonger' who's decorated the table in front of her with Barbies and bright pink candies and has some ASMR situation type deal going on with the audio. And that was JUST AS REVOLTING as watching Ambo shovel in those noodz a couple of minutes ago. YouTube, ban them both.
JUMPCUT!! Now it's this guy stuffing in an ungodly amount of noodles using chopsticks. Don't know him (don't watch this stuff), but there is a watermark on the video that says "ZACH CHOI". Amber doesn't seem to care that her true supporters are usually fatties with food issues of their own and don't want to be subjected to this type of shit on her channel, regardless of WHO is doing it.
Besides, I thought Amber claimed that she didn't watch videos like this due to them making her want to binge?
Amber is wondering if she should try 'low carb', because she doesn't know what to do. The idea to STOP EATING LIKE A PIG never enters her mind.
JUMPCUT!! Just finished filling in another journal (with notes that were already written on her macbook/iphone), and she wants to show us in another video all of the journals she's filled with her useless nonsense. No one's arguing that it's faster to type than write - people are pointing out the STUPIDITY of having something saved digitally, then wasting time WRITING IT OUT, only to throw that book in a storage unit to rot and never be reviewed.
OH, and then she deletes the digital version, because why keep a digital backup of something in a time when digital storage mediums are the tiniest, cheapest, and most stable/durable that they've EVER been? Especially regarding something that you claim to be therapeutic and helpful for your mentulz? That's like taking a digital photo, trying to reproduce the image on shitty dollar store lined paper with CRAYONS, and then DELETING THE PHOTO! (The absurdity of this is actually pretty funny).
I don't care about Amber's lessons about how to journal. Most adults learned how to write in a notebook when they were in the 1st or 2nd grade.[SKIP]
Amber starts talking about the July 4th breakup. Amber claims they were talking about the breakup for A MONTH before it happened. Hang on, I think I have a gif for this...
Yeah, that's not the face of a mutual break up that was discussed a month in advance.
Jade hasn't been in videos because she feels awkward about it... and not because she's already gone. Amber doesn't want to talk for Jade (but then talks for Jade).
JUMPCUT!! Editing-Lynn on the next day! Jade isn't a social media person and that's why she's not online. Just forget about all of Jade's social media that was found, that she contacted Amber on social media, and that ALL of Amber's ex-gorlfriends were found through social media. Oh, and that Amber is SO housebound than unless someone drives her around in a car, Amber can't even get a soda from down the street IN HER OWN COMPLEX and needs it DoorDashed.
"She's not a social media person; she's a very private person"
FREEZE FRAME!
This has the energy of a terrorist kidnapping video, where Jade is making sure that Amber tells her audience that Jade isn't Jade - or it's a fake side-eye to the absent Jade... maybe BOLTH.
JUMPCUT!! Back to the vlog.
FREEZE FRAME!!
(Total 2019 vibes here...)
Why July 4th? Amber doesn't want to talk about it because it's personal. July 4th is Amber's favorite holiday, because it's Methmama's favourite, and Amber pretends she's watching them with her mom because they are both watching fireworks at the same time. They broke up before fireworks, but Amber demanded that Jade take her to fireworks anyway despite Jade not wanting to (because only what Amber wants actually matters).
Amber claimed that they planned the fireworks date 2 months before, and finds it weird that people wonder why they went to see fireworks if they had just broken up. Obviously, this is a LIE, as NO ONE was wondering this, since Amber implied their date was cancelled, and she never told us that she still saw the fireworks. Here we again have Amber trying to control a narrative BEFORE it's even a narrative.
Also, let's look at Amber's proclaimed timeline:
May 2023: Amber and Jade plan the fireworks date.
June 2023: Amber and Jade discuss breaking up.
July 4 2023: Amber films the weird as fuck Q&A
July 4 2023: Amber and Jade breakup; still go see fireworks.
July 5? 2023: Amber films a weepy and blubbery breakup video. Posts it on the 6th.
July 7-24 2023: Amber complains about not knowing how to go on with life.
Amber can't believe people think she's faking this. I KNOW! It's not like Amber's timelines are fucked to hell. Or like anyone has ever caught Amber in a lie. Or that Amber has ever admitted to lying about something...
If it was a fake breakup, Amber says she would be spilling some tea. No, actually, if it was a fake breakup you'd be keeping quiet to not alienate your still-gorlfriend. REAL BREAKUPS involve you exaggerating, embellishing, and flat-out lying to throw your exes under the bus, like you did with Casey, Destiny, and Becky.
"I'm never going to say anything bad about Feline; I'm never going to spill tea on her". You said that about Destiny, too. And Becky...
"...she wants nothing but the best for me. And I want nothing bust the best for her. Like, we're literal best friends". You said that about Destiny, too. And Becky. And Krystle.
Amber can't believe how common it is for people to live on friendly terms with their exes. IT'S NOT. Oh, those imaginary people in her head have been messaging her on IG again.
The lighting in her bedroom is terrible because she's using her cellphone ... because the bulb in the ceiling fixture needs to be changed. Hmmm, if Folgers was there, she would have changed the bulb for you by now...
Byee!!! Fuck off, gaslighter.
