-- VLOGMAS 2022 --
Location: Hurpling through the living room.
Lighting has been horrendous on her camera, but she thinks she's fixed it. She's not a camera gorl. Horrendous lighting is fixed by fixing the LIGHTING, not the camera. In fact, if you go to GoodWill, you might be able to pick up a slightly used Ring Light which would help your lighting situation. Amber has been enjoying doing her makeup lately. Amber asks why must you do makeup to be presentable? When Amber used to have a normal job, she ALWAYS did her makeup [and hid in the bathroom instead of working until her supervisor had to walk around looking for her]. Amber's trying now. Honestly, I don't care either way. That being said, I find it funny about how she claims that she wasn't into makeup, yet had an entire fish bowl full of lipsticks, as well as excess with every other type of makeup.
Location: Standing in the Kitchen.
PACKAGE UNBOXING: It's from 'Woman Within', where she gets her pants. Amber's not wearing pants right now - You're welcome. She needs to buy many at a time because she gets holes in them. Yes, because you buy 2 sizes too small so they are tight, which stretches them thin and makes them easier to rip. Well, that and 'chub-rub' - You're welcome.
Jump Cut!! Here they are. Waaay too long... and way too tight. This is just an excuse for a full length body shot.
Location: Sitting on the couch.
Cuddling with the Chonky-Twonk. The Twonk scales Mount Amber.
Weight loss surgery update: Amber watched the seminar and learned a only bit of stuff - she already knew most of it. The place seems warm and welcoming - here B4 Amber starts claiming that the surgeon was incompetent and wanted her to mainline sodium. She filled out the 'thing', but they haven't emailed her back yet. She wants to document this process in case she does get the surgery, so she can look back at these vlogs. They are ordering 'Jimmy Johns'(?) because they are craving a 'sandwich moment' and don't have anything at home for it. Amber also wants to make her chili. Becky wasn't lying about liking the chili, because Jade likes it too.
Present Time: It's Amber's turn! Amber thinks it's a journal. She opens it and it's a shower ... something. I can't make out what she said, and neither could YouTube Skynet with their autogenerated captions. She's trying to smell it, so I'm guessing it's either some scented hygiene product or it's food. I'd say even money on which it ends up being. Amber is SO SHOCKED because she almost bought Jade the exact same one in blue! OMG! WHAT ARE THE ODDS?! SUCH A CRAZY WORLD WE LIVE IN! - Yeah, I still have no fucking clue what this shit is. Amber says they are shower steamer aromatherapy shower bombs. Cruelty free and vegan. I STILL don't know what this is.
Jade says that Twinkie looks like a blueberry muffin. Well, she does have the roundness. Jade calls Amber out on her pigsty of a couch. Amber replys with 'people live here'.
Amber opens the box. OH - they are smelly little soap pucks! Amber tries to eat one. OMG I was just joking, but now Amber's talking about wanting to eat one as well as wanting to eat Vicks VapoRub. She's tasted it before. I think that a statement like that would be grounds for a psychologist to call the police and have you involuntarily committed for a 72 hour observation. Maybe you need a Snickers, Amber. You know you try to eat the soap when you're hungry.
"You're the beautiful one"... "No, I think *you're* the beautiful one". JUST STOP! NEITHER OF YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!! Okay!? Can we move on now? What the hell am I watching? Was yesterday a full moon?
Jump Cut: Twinkie with the zoomies, playing with a balled up sock or something. Rarity feels left out and tries to join in, but the kanine energy is too much. She supervises from the 'window seal' instead.
Jump Cut: SAMMICH TIME! Amber got a large sub, BBQ chips, and a large soda. We now get to watch Amber put chips on her sandwich. Yes, Amber, lots of people put chips or fries on their sandwiches. In fact, there's a sandwich called a 'chip butty'. Actually, go check it out, Ambo. I guarantee you'll like it.
Sandwich done. Errand time! Come with us!
Location: EB Games
Need to buy a memory card for her Game Cube so they can play Mario Party. Amber's surprised they don't have memory cards for a 20 year old system. To anyone else who misses and wants to play these old retro games: YouTube search "Batocera".
Location: Tuesday Morning
Looking for a Christmas blanket. None were Amber's style (they didn't have any gaudy, tacky blankets? Weird).
Location: Dollar Tree
Buying stuff to give to the homeless. Talks about her 'actively homeless' family and how she does everything she can for them. Not going to deliver it tonight, because she needs to save the content for another vlogmas episode it's storming really badly. Amber wishes there was more she could do to help. Jade paid for half of this because she's such an amazing person.
Okay, time out. With all of this Jade paying half of everything, it's really making me wonder. Either this is all a lie and shade at Becky, or we have quite possibly found the dumbest girlfriend yet. Any guesses?
Location: Game Exchange.
So, it's storming too badly to drop the items off at the shelter, but not bad enough to keep driving around to find a 20 year old memory card to play a video game. She found a Nyko 128MB card in original packaging.
Location: Sitting on the couch.
"We made it home safe and sound". We figured that out already by the fact that we are watching this video, Captain Obvious. Her car anxiety and storm anxiety said no more driving for tonight (read: Amber got everything she wanted, so no reason to go anywhere else). They are playing Jenga. I thought you wrote naughty things on the blocks? Gee, another LAH. We get to watch another Jenga game, and Amber of course acts like an idiot. Jade calls out Amber's cheating. ARGUMENT CLICKBAIT. Amber makes her face bright red with pretend crying, then immediately laughs. What a bitch. Jade says that breaking up with Amber over Jenga is valid. I'd say breaking up with Amber over ANYTHING is valid.
Amber makes a lot of fat jokes about herself. Cool, so then we can too!
Location: Sitting at her desk.
Cat Advent Calendar: Cute little reindeer head. Rarity likes it.
Play-Doh Advent Calendar: light blue, snowflake mold, and plastic knife. Amber makes a Lovecraftian abomination.
Jump Cut!! We get to watch her responding to comments from her last vlog.
YouTube Random Comment Picker
PunkRockenMomma says "We all have a pimple situation type of deal situation"
Amber says thank you to PunkRockenMomma for the comment situation type deal.
Byee!!!
-- VLOGMAS 2022 --