"Hey Guise" Amber's back. She's looking cleaner than she did on Vlogmas 25. I guess Jade has returned from her suspected visit to family and hit Amber with the power washer before they turned on the camera.
Amber's worried she's forgotten how to talk on camera because of the 10 days she took off from vlogging.
She was going to come back on the 2nd or 3rd, but she was too lazy I guess.
Weekly weigh-ins are back. Weigh-ins will be on Sunday, but she did one today because she's behind (but won't tell you until later so you have to sit through her ads).
Amber gives a long explanation about what the weigh-in videos will be about - and it's the exact empty promises she makes every single time she restarts her cycle to Phase 1.
Amber is going to go on instagram before each weight-related video to beg her audience for content ideas ("questions" that she'll never honestly answer).
Q1: Did you have a lot of loose skin before when you lost weight (572.4 to 466)?
A1: She didn't have loose skin, but more movement and less swelling in the skin (like a partially deflated balloon).
Q2: Do you experience knee pain?
A2: When she was 13 or so and in the 300s, a teacher asked her if her knees and ankles hurt from her weight. Amber didn't know what that meant. She never had struggles, other than "Boolean" (HELLO THERE!). Amber still to this day doesn't get knee pain. She does have leg pain, but it's lipedema related and not obesity related.
(Bullshit, as we all have eyes, and see her walk with her knees locked. I'm sure they don't have full range of motion, and hurt when she tries to flex them.)
Q3: Why do you buy so many clothes at your current size if you want to lose weight?
Q4: Amber is confused by the question. People think she buys clothing that's too small for her, which means she'll still fit in them with tons of weight loss. One thing she's noticed from gaining and LOSING large chunks of weight (losing WHEN?) is that her clothes and sizes never change.
(Of course, she misses the point that it's financially STUPID to have spent like, 15-20K over the last 4 years on clothes when she's been approximately the same weight during that time (500lbs). 90% of the clothing she doesn't even wear, and the 10% she does wear will look like she's wearing a parachute if she does lose the weight)
Q4: Why won't you show us your lipedema or lymphedema?
A4: Amber won't show it because she's self-conscious and knows what type of people watch her. People make fun of her body - especially her legs - so why would she want to put herself through that?
(Though appearing on camera unwashed with a greasy rat's nest for hair, sweat-stained and dirty clothes, while shoving massive forkfuls of food into her gut and moaning like a pornstar is totes okie-dokie).
Q5: If Ozempic causes gallstones, wouldn't WLS do the same?
A5: Amber had gallstones since she was 21, after 'rapidly' losing 60 lbs, and has had problems since then. She was losing weight before Ozempic obviously - lost 106lbs in total - which made the gallstones start acting up again, and she was told to stop taking Ozempic because it was causing rapid weight loss (OBVIOUS DUPER'S DELIGHT SMILE) which is like a mess because ... what does she choose? Does she choose gallstone pain, or does she choose like, she's gotta be healthy because she's got to lose weight. It's so confusing. What good does she choose, what bad does she choose? If she gets WLS, taking out her gallbladder is an option, so that's probably what would happen (then why not stay on Ozempic if the gallbladder is gonna get fucked by WL anyway?) She can't get her gallbladder taken out yet. She's talked to medical professionals - including a surgeon - and it's too risky due to her weight (still doesn't answer my question of why doesn't she stay on Ozempic if the gallbladder is gonna get fucked by WL anyway).
(I had to type a lot of that verbatim because it was so batshit I couldn't condense it. To answer her question: you choose the gallstone pain, as you've shown yourself incapale of slowly losing weight by 'just being healthy'. At this point, shit is life-threatening, and you've already done irreversible damage. You sacrifice the gallbladder - that you can live without - in order to save the rest of your organs... At least, that's what I would suggest to someone who actually WANTS to lose weight).
Done, you only get 5 questions. She used to give 3, but she likes to talk now.
January 1st weigh-in: 520.0lb on the dot. Such amazing weight loss from her last weigh-in during Vlogmas of 521.something! Take that you fucking shitlord haydurzs who thought she was going to get FAT during her post-vlogmas staycation! (Oh wait...)
She's so fucking glad about that - because weight loss/gain just happens. It's not like you can control it at all with calorie intake, donchaknow?
Goals for this year: Not the broccoli-chicken-fruit diet (that she never actually did), because that's why she binged. The focus will be on reality - then she says she wants to weigh 399.8 before 2024 (a weight which hasn't been a reality since living with Krystal parents and the food was locked up).
"It's doable, because it's only 2.something lbs per week" - despite her claiming in her quitting Ozempic video that her 1-2lbs per week weight loss was RAPID and bad for her gallbladder.
No takeout in January, from her 3 times/day takeout habit. It's day 4 and still no takeout this year.... which makes this her 4th time attempting no takeout? Amber is allowed to eat whatever she wants, as long as it's prepared at home. Example: lasagna that Jade made for her. That'll teach you to go do something for yourself, Jade! Now you have to stay home and prepare all of Hamboar's meals, OR SHE'LL BINGE AND IT WILL BE ALL OF YOUR FAULT!! You gotta EARN those Jordans, gorl! I guess plaintain chip and chocolate almond binges snacky-poos are cool, too, since she also eats them at home. This sounds like an alcoholic saying they are going to cure their addiction by switching from wine to beer - or drinking at home instead of at the bar. 'Normal foods' in 'normal quantities' (but I'm sure Amber's 'normal' portions need to be bigger because she's bigger). HA! Right after I typed that, Amber admitted that she doesn't know what normal means.
New goals in February - she hasn't pulled that out of her ass yet ... tune in next time to find out! Same FAT time, same FAT channel!!
Diets and calorie counting (and portion control, and avoiding nutritionless food, and accountability) don't work for Amber.
Journaling has been upgraded to BULLET JOURNALING! - and a NEW JOURNAL! FUCK YEAH!! (if anyone actually cares). Amber drew boxes on a page all by herself to record her weekly weigh-ins! NoRulerLynn. ArtisticLynn also drew a jar on the paper to hold all of the el-beez she's gonna lose (to be represented as colourful hearts). Tell us you love your fat without telling us you love your fat, Amber! Ooh, and ANOTHER chart cross off every el-bee lost as it happens - yet no plans to deal with 'inflection points' - because THAT would actually be useful. I wonder what happened to the Plum Paper journal she got in November?
"I hope you guys enjoyed this video," (she knows that we didn't) "and I'll see you in the next one! Byee! *blows kiss*
