Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

[Toothpaste Chocolates]

I really hope she gets weight loss surgery. She really believes that she will lose weight and her body will just snap into a human shape. I want to see that disappointment then reaction.

Same here. I'm in for the long run for this. I hope I get to see some despair as Amber rants about how her final magic bullet failed to give her a slim and sexy body, denying her a take-that to her dispeckful fat-shaming haydurs.

 

[Totally real FBI Frank]

Those Reddit photos that were shared? I have to say it. I honestly thought she would look bigger. Maybe it’s because she’s short, but I thought her body would look more rotund. Maybe I need my eyes checked.

It’s because she was wearing all black and that is slimeeeeeeeeeeen. Dark colors take off 5 to a couple three hundred pounds don’t ya know?

 

[Witch Bitch]

Some redditor lives in the same complex as Hamber and MG,W and saw them returning from somewhere.

View attachment 5066653
Miss Dainty Trauma naturally not bothering to carry anything in. That's for peasants slaves caretakers gfs.

Her weight is defiantly "dropping", my guess as before is her skin cant maintain the elasticity it had before so it's turning more into an apron.

Also of course she isnt helping carry anything. She's carrying 350lbs at all times shes gotta have her hands free incase she falls again and she needs total concentration on breathing as she hustles for the safety of home.

 

[Lack of a better nickname]

Wasn't she supposed to leave that flat and go in another state by now?

 

[lol cow supreme]

Those Reddit photos that were shared? I have to say it. I honestly thought she would look bigger. Maybe it’s because she’s short, but I thought her body would look more rotund. Maybe I need my eyes checked.

It’s because she was wearing all black and that is slimeeeeeeeeeeen. Dark colors take off 5 to a couple three hundred pounds don’t ya know?

If you're used to the likes of Chantal or other fats who put all their weight in there belly, you'd think she'd look more huge. Amber's weight distribution is literally all over, anywhere the body can find to put it. You look at someone like Chantal and see that huge Gunt sticking out over "little" legs. With Amber its a blob from head to toe. Her legs are massive, she has way more fat on the "sides" of her, and her ass making her more "blob" instead of a big gut sticking out. Its decetptive when you dont see any one feature bulging out. She's just a hulking mass with no perspective in the photo. If there was a normal sized 5' 2" woman next to her you'd then be shocked.

She's also very WIDE, and this picture is catching her "slimmer" angle hiding a lot of the bulk.

Here's a picture with a 5' 2" woman scaled correctly for ambers height in the photo.

 

[the weeknd warrior]

If there was a normal sized 5' 2" woman next to her you'd then be shocked.

She's also very WIDE, and this picture is catching her "slimmer" angle hiding a lot of the bulk.

 

[Bogliacci]

View attachment 5069086

In awe at how someone can allow themselves to get so painfully immense.

 

[notfoodienotbeauty]

Some redditor lives in the same complex as Hamber and MG,W and saw them returning from somewhere.

View attachment 5066652View attachment 5066653


Her body really is melting to the ground. Look at her leg in the first one. Beyond being as massive as an elephant's, the weight of her thigh is really sinking over her knees now. Hamber's going to be wearing an extra fat suit over her existing one. Miss Dainty Trauma naturally not bothering to carry anything in. That's for peasants slaves caretakers gfs.

Why carry anything when she has her very own nigger to do everything for her?

And Jade is having drop her off at the entrance so she doesn't have to walk the extra 3 metres after she has parked the car ... the lazy ....

Becky did the same thing, picked fatass up at the door and dropped her off. I would bet my life she has never steeped foot in the parking garage or lot they park in.

@Low cow supreme can't quote you, but it won't take long for that car to be like Becky's was. Her fatass will ruin the suspension and shocks. It was always funny how that car struggled to go, or when they went over a bump would keep going up and down, for several seconds after.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

Small point since I'm MATI already: phobia is "fear of". We aren't afraid of your ugly lumps and huge balls of fat, Amber .We're repulsed by them.

Worth bringing this up again. So fucking tired of _______phobia.

1. It's ableist, you ableist FUCKS
2. A phobia is an irrational, crippling FEAR.
3. And if I'm afraid, then it is YOUR JOB to:

ALLAY
MY
FUCKING
FEARS

ALLAY

Not shame/fire/deplatform/ridicule/discriminate against.

So just call it what you really should be calling it: "Get off my ass, MAAAAAAAAAAN!"

Don't make me go ham (heh) on you both. "Phobia" is fear or aversion.

 

[KSavario]

Here's a picture with a 5' 2" woman scaled correctly for ambers height

No matter how many times I'm reminded or her height, it just doesn't fully register to me.

 

[Situation Type Deal Gorl]

I hope this really is the person who sent it.

 

[Boolean Bitch]

Declawing a cat is pretty cruel, any owner who does that is an asshole. I hope she hasn’t done that.

In an IG story a while back, Amber claimed that Wasabi was already neutered when she got him (unlikely based on how small he was in her videos, but who knows). IF that's true, it's also possible the previous owners just did a 'one and done' and declawed him at the same time. All of that seems unlikely to me, as Amber has always shown herself to find her animals at PetSmart rather than shelters, but I suppose it COULD be a possibility (pressing XXXXX).

Personally I’m of the opinion the door damage has been done by a dog - likely Twinkie jumping at the handle to try and get out. Could start a great scandal (contain yourselves Reddit fatties) by saying they obvs lock her in that room a lot and she gets distressed and tries to break out her prison. More likely she sees another dog wander by the window and attacks the fuck out the door trying to get to them (I may or may not know a few dogs and doorframes this may or may not apply to). Which room is it the door frame of?

Defo not cats, they fray at wooden objects as @Widdle Woach notes. But I’m happy to buy into the official theory of Lol, Fat. Amber is too fat for her doorframes confirmed!

It's POSSIBLE, but I don't think so, for several reasons. One, it looks like it's the door in the hallway of their open-concept 'main room' (kitchen, living room, hallway), that leads to 'the office' - where Amber spends all of her time sitting at her standing desk. With frequent movements to and from the kitchen, that would be the frame to take the most damage. Highly unlikely that Twinkie would be clawing to get IN that room.

Two, Amber has already shown apartment damage caused by Twinkie. The door to the patio has a full length window, and the bottom 1/4 of the horizontal blinds have been twisted and cracked - obviously by a small dog clawing and trying to stick their head though. There were also greasy smears on the glass in that area (again, signs of a tiny nose and tongue going to town on the glass. That's most likely the door that Twinkie is taken for walkies through, and if any door were to by scrached by the dog, it would be that one.

Three, contractors for apartments always use the cheapest quality 'builder's grade' paint. This shit is little more than chalk and dye in a can and barely chemically qualifies as paint. It looks like the apartment used to have a traditional paint style of white trim, then changed to dark trim during it's reno to "luxery" status. Semi-gloss and full-gloss trim paint is very shiny, and it can be difficult to get good adhesion to it unless it's prepped properly (scuff-sanding, degreasing, washing of cleaner residue) - and it's espeically bad when using low quality paint. Constantly rubbing against the painted surface like, oh I don't know, a human SHELF constantly squeezing through the doorframe, can loosen a piece that didn't adhere well. And at that point, the paint can be ripped off in large sections like a sticker...

...and I just spent more than 5 minutes sperging about damage patterns on paint. FUCKSAKES AMBER IS BORING!!!

And Jade is having drop her off at the entrance so she doesn't have to walk the extra 3 metres after she has parked the car ... the lazy ....

But I thought she had improved her stamina with all of her 'walkeeeeen' on the spot and 'high knees' (which always sounds like 'hiney' when she says it).

Ah, I see FatAl is still rocking those tiny backpacks. Of all the idiotic things she does I think the tiny backpacks are my favorite.

It just looks so fuckin' RIDICULOUS. The gigantic human(?) mountain and that itty bitty backpack, never fails to brighten the day.

I don't actually think this is a "tiny" backpack - I think it's just one that's a little too small for school books. Though, when I see her in it, it feels like I'm watch a scene from Maze Runner (except the aspect ratio has been stretched to 32:9 or something)

Those Reddit photos that were shared? I have to say it. I honestly thought she would look bigger. Maybe it’s because she’s short, but I thought her body would look more rotund. Maybe I need my eyes checked.

I don't think she can get much bigger and still be seen moving under her own power. If she keeps this up, we won't see her outside of her apartment without a wrecking ball and a towmotor.

@lol cow supreme you forgot to factor in the weight of the fuel in your calculations. A full tank of fuel is around 130 pounds. As long as ALR is only 550 pounds there isn’t much weight left

Still, converting that calculation to more usuable units works out to less than 1 metre per HOUR (0.90864 m/hr). And as we'd likely be walking along the ground and not trying to go straight up (not simultaneously trying to achieve escape velocity for Earth), I think we'll be okay.
Hey, wait a minute! 1m/hr is also Amber's walking speed! Math can be funny sometimes.

 

[Salvador Dali]

target haul, living room makeover, & meeting my surgeon tomorrow | vlog​

Spoiler: April 19, 2023 Archive

 

[Bam_Margeras_Ass_Licker]

 

[that blue peach]

I hope this really is the person who sent it.

If it is, then god damn, this person is an idiot of astronomic levels. Not only were they stupid enough to send expensive bread and cake to a 500-600lb hambeast, but to also apologize for it despite her absolute cunty behavior in response? Geez louise, that's gotta be a special breed of retard. In any case I hope this is just a rando wanting attention and not the actual sender because I don't want Hamber to have the satisfaction of getting an apology.

Edited to correct engrish.

 

[HackerX]

It’s because she was wearing all black and that is slimeeeeeeeeeeen. Dark colors take off 5 to a couple three hundred pounds don’t ya know?

I am trying to imagine leggings in any other color and very intrigued. Those hamhocks are transcendent.

 

[Mekahineyho]

When wifey buys sweet waffle biscuits for her coffee after you went ballistic about coffee cake

 

[TheCakeIsALie]

Those Reddit photos that were shared? I have to say it. I honestly thought she would look bigger. Maybe it’s because she’s short, but I thought her body would look more rotund. Maybe I need my eyes checked.

I think it comes down to fat distribution. Look at Chantal. Chantal is absolutely rotund and it’s shocking how small her legs are compared to the rest of her. She holds most of her weight in her abdomen.

Pic is old, she looks even more rounder but you can see what I mean with the legs.

Then there’s Amber. She holds a lot of weight in her butt (she has butt wings), legs and in her abdomen. I actually do believe she has lymphedema, you can see a little of it in the right most pic.

HOWEVER, it would improve with weight loss, less salt, and seeing a lymphedema specialist. Binging all the time and eating salty, fatty foods is not helping. It looks around stage 3. So not horribly severe.

 

[Smiling with air]

View attachment 5069435View attachment 5069443

How she not dead?

 

[Boolean Bitch]

Plot Summary with Commentary, readable in less than 3 minutes! Alright, let's get start- wait a second. That thumbnail... why is the knob missing from the door? Is Amber starting to have fine motor control issues with her Mickey Mouse mitts? Did management come in and repaint some of the doors/trim?

Bah, whatever. Maximum warp! ENGAGE!

Spoiler: target haul, living room makeover, & meeting my surgeon tomorrow | vlog

"...okay, so...." I see we're just starting mid-sentence with no intro or semblence of professionalism.

"I have a massive Target haul?????" Ridiculous thumbnail posing while the sound of camera shutters has been edited in.

THE HAUL!!
Cucumber/mint and coconut/pineapple "sparkling water", chicken sausages, premade hardboiled eggs, plantain chips, cheese, bubble wrap, bubble wrap, tape, OLLY melatonin, mini PB pretzels, Stroopwafels, pistashios, mac'n'cheese bites, dog food, dog food, dog food, wax melt warmer, wax melt warmer.

Ah, her usual bulking diet grocery haul that she's been showing us for years.

Amber tried drinking coffee for a few days, but it just isn't 'jiving' with her. Inadvertantly gives away her lie from late summer/early fall of 2021 that she was living alone and the coffee was hers.

CaFfIeNe SeNsItIvE... buy decaf, you dummy! TMI, but I've mentioned before that I deal with benign PACs too, and if you really want coffee with SOME caffiene, all you have to do is mix decaf with a bit of regular grounds (I go one cup at a time using those mesh things that sit on top of the mug and use a measuring spoon). It also gives you the opportunity to use speciality coffee, as decaf coffee is usually only available in the flavours of decaf, decaf, and DECAF.

Oops, I'm drifting, sorry.

LIVING ROOM MAKEOVER!!
Jade cleaned up the shit off the couch , added a rug, and finished assembling the coffee table. No makeover. CLICKBAIT.

@Constellationzero Quick toe sighting at 3:56 if you're interested.
{Edited to Add: I'll just add it in]

New 'Welcome' mats for all of the visitors she doesn't get (still in their retail boxes).

[FELINE TEACHING ME HOW TO PRONOUNCE "CASHEW"]
NO ONE CARES!!

Sparkling Water taste test with disembodied voice - NO ONE CARES!

"But natural flavours usually means the liquid, the juices, that comes out of otters... and beavers. And if something's coloured red, it's bugs. It's beetles"... *Jade mumbles off camera*.... "It comes out of their anal region. I'm not lying, I learned about it... Look it up".

Okay, for the red thing, yes, some red food dye (natural red 4, or 'carmine') is made from bugs (specifically cochineal bugs). BUT Red #40 is a synthetic compound named naphthalene sulfonic acid. So not all red dye comes from bugs, but yes, many food items have it. Amber obviously doesn't remember when it was bougie to eat escargot.

Beaver anal secretions (Castoreum) CAN be used as a flavour enhancer for flavours like vanilla, strawberry, and raspberry, and is sometimes present in perfumes - though in present day it's not really used anymore (likely because we don't aggressively hunt beavers anymore so we don't have metric tons of carcasses to use up). And it's not like it's from the intestine in the poop. It's a gland that's removed and used - or rather WAS. As only a few hundred lbs of this is collected PER YEAR, so it's likely considered a specialty item not present in mass-produced items for us plebs.

Amber tries to confirm with Alexa, who wants nothing to do with the conversation.

FREEZE FRAME!!

This deeply troubles Amber. You know, this would likely be a non-issue if all of your food didn't come premade in bags and boxes, or delivered by an UberEats driver.

Well, at least we now know what Amber does with her internet access and free time.

"We live a lie". Oh Ambo, you silly dolt. If only you had the intellectual capacity to realize the full extent of what you just said. Baby steps, Amber. First start with accepting the lie you live that your fatness is everyone's fault except for yours!

[NEXT DAY]

Today she's meeting her surgeon. Want to find out what happens? Tune in next time: same FAT time, same FAT channel!

PO BOX TIME!!
Pink plastic slippers, earrings.

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: Stop wasting money sending shit to Amber! I don't want to have to quote Matty-Boy in EVERY summary!

TL;DR: Amber buys food and junk from Target. Amber acts stupid on camera. Brief toe sighting @3:56. Jade finishes the coffee tables and tidies the living room (and Amber calls that a 'makeover'). Amber freaks out about the true origin of some food additives and colourings. No explaination given for why that door didn't have a knob.

{Edited to Add:]

@Smiling with air
How she not dead?

Maybe she is, and what we're witnessing is just gas escaping.