Hamber continues to pretend all is well.
Remember how she demanded a goal from the WLS? Supposedly, it was set at one pound a week. She claims her scale at home, which she's been using to weigh herself daily, even though every single time she does this she quits because it was messing with muh mentalz, shows slow progression - in OUNCES, mind you, when at 2200-2500 calories she should be dropping pounds (more on this below) - and she's going to show the weight "with clothes" at the WLS, which she hopes will show the same. Here's a tip, you POS: wear clothes when you weigh yourself at home, so the difference in weight between sessions will be the same, even if the numbers between the scales are not. Idiot.
GrammarLynn says she's been doing "really good", claims everyone wanted this slow, limping on a dangleen ankle weight loss, and I can say this is likely only what Hamber wanted, given the shit she still eats. Anyway, we've left the house! Holy shit. It's pouring rain, which would appear, based on that, that this was filmed on the 17th or she picked random rainy day footage and stuffed it in. Or, of course, this is all VERY old footage.
Hamber films a worm. She does not speak about it at that moment, it is not mentioned and does not appear again. Edit this shit out.
If we recall from the last weighin, she was at 528.5 or 9 or whatever bullshit decimal it was. In this video, the scale reads 525.5. I had to stop there for a moment because I was laughing so hard I started crying and then had a coughing fit. You claim no one wanted to set a weight loss goal for the next appointment, except you. You are Hamber, Special Super-Serious Person and you need goals! Your goal is one pound per week. Four poun in a munt shall be that goal. You, Hamber, Special Super-Serious Person, say this is no problem.
Congrats, dipshit, the goal you so desperately wanted, and that you could probably have obtained by just taking a big shit, is one you still can't hit.
And now we're back on the couch or sitting at the standing desk or whatever - she's sitting, as usual. She's rambling about how she didn't get a lot of sleep last night - know what would help with that? A CPAP machine. Says she just laid in bed for an hour, cuddling with the dog, with the shit wiper. You know what would have served you better than just lying around when you're tired and have no intention of napping? Walking around. Exercising. Anything physical.
Hernia: says this is now "more than likely" going to be fixed in surgery. Really? I have a hard time believing that, UNLESS Hamber does NOT, in fact, have insurance as she claims, and the WLS says the fee for just that could be wrapped up in the WLS cost since she'll be under already, something I doubt. It would be easy enough to get approved for that if she had insurance.
Gallbladder: All this time, she's been acting as if they already know the extent of the issues with the gallbladder, but apparently she now has a "physical order" to go get it checked? WTF? People might not think everything out of your goddamned mouth is a lie if you would just tell the fucking truth, bitch.
Hamber says she has to have another EKG, then whatever is left of these "therapy" sessions to be approved "or whatever else" for WLS. Beyond the important part about being able to actually follow a planned diet and lose weight, I suppose.
Diet update: Hamber hates calling it a "diet" because of the "negative connotations" of the word. Ever notice how that's only said by people who refuse to follow prescribed diets? Like people who bitch about "illegals are taking our jobz, man!" are the ones who won't do the shit jobs migrant workers do, even at triple the pay? Yeah.
Anyway, Hamber wants to call it a "lifestyle change" even though for her, THAT should also have a negative connotation, given that every single time she's said she's calling something a "lifestyle change", it has wound up being something she never sticks to. So call it whatever you want, I guess, Hamber. The story always ends the same. The previous diet - the diet the dietitian gave her - had macros to hit and a calorie range of 2200-2500. "And she noticed, and I noticed, collectively" - just say "We noticed" you pompous cunt, JFC, WriterLynn - "it was just too many calories." Hamber informs us that she knows a bunch of people like to say she should be able to eat 2500 calories and lose weight just like that (she snaps her fat sausage fingers) at her weight, and "that's just not realistic."
She's telling us we have to ruuhhlize that she has limpedema and lymphedema and ALL THE DEMAS and the laws of thermodynamics do not apply to her as they do to we peasants. She has a very, very, very, VERY BAD case of lipidema, guize! Yes, times four VERYs, that's how VERY BAD it is!
"You guys have seen my laygs." We have seem your legs encased in leggings so tight it makes you looks like one of those weirdos who like to climb into bags and have the air sucked out so they've been vacuum-packed. We have not, however, seen your laygs as in really seeing them in the flesh. Don't be trying your semantic gsmes around here. Limpedema is "abnormal fat that just doesn't want to go away, no matter how much you diet. It just wants to get bigger and collect more fat cells," ProfessorLynnn tells us. Technically, DoctorLynn Medicine Woman, lipedema is abormally large fat cells that tend to congregate in the lower body. That said, WTF are you doing to manage it?> Oh, right. Nothing. The lipedema doc with the xray vision who knew you had lipedema before even looking at your laygs probably just said oh well, sucks to be you, and walked away without telling you to do anything, like compression, manual drainage, changing your diet - ooooh, I seem to recall that last one. But what the hell, you can consult with your colleague Dr Web, MD, when you need anything. And you apparently think you don't, so I'd guess that's been a hard no on compression and drainage and altering the diet.
She also tells us that lymphedema is excess fluid. Technically, it is backed up lymphatic fluid, which - shocker - she also does nothing about management of it. The two demas are good for hanging that responsibility for not losing wight on, though! Or maybe not, if someone wanted to do
fuckall to work for it, and as we know of Hamber, she's just not into that whole work thing.
Current diet: too many calories! New diet: fewer calories! Don't bother counting macros! Goddamn, who is this fictional dietitian? Supposedly now is supposed to eat 1800-2000 calories a day. And no macro counting, and Hamber is so happy about that, because it was "confusing and super overwhelming" despite the fact that she knows more about nutrition than anyone. How does that work? Ah, sorry, forgot myself: works just fine if you're lying out your ass.
Exercise update: claims to have been exercising, as she "showed us." Acknowledges she showed us a piece of paper, claims to have been still doing those exercises, and I still don't believe it. Dietitian tells her to continue twice a week. Wait, wasn't it three times a week before? Whatever. Those exercises are not going to do much of anything even if she were doing them at all. She claims to be "self-conscious" about filming her doing the exercises - sure you are - but if her "supporters" want to see it, she can film it. She won't, and she clearly isn't exercising in any way that's helpful, so we'll just move ahead.
Looking forward: next appointment at the WLS is already scheduled, and it coincides with the last therapy session before she can get approved "or whatever it may be". It's a reassessment to see if more needs to be done (it does, clearly, Ms "Four pounds in a month is no problem, watch me lose three instead". Or, if she is ready for WLS. You are not.
This bitch is still sitting here trying to gaslight us and the WLS place: she's noticed since she started therapy and taking zoloft and "doing everything" - what everything?) - her relationship with food has "improved so much. Takeout isn't something I think about daily." Says the 600 pound toddler who supposedly choked on a potato from a takeout seafood boil and shit her pants while doing so. Sure, PotatoLynn.
"Now we just have to concentrate on getting my lipedema, my lymphedema on the same page as my brain, my heart, and my calories." WTF does that even mean? You've been ignoring both for a decade. You've done nothing to manage either even during this WLS arc, even having met with a specialist (allegedly), even after whatever info the WLS place gave you. But then, of course, you couldn't use it to excuse the fact you're eating way over 2500 calories a day to maintain the wight you have, oopsie! The whole of you doesn't have either edema, and none of the rest is losing weight either.
Weight: at home, 521.8. WLS: 525.5. Three pound loss in a month. Hamber claimed the dietitian was "really proud" of the "progress" she made. What fucking progress?
Thar's up to just under 6 minutes in the video. Something she could have edited down, but at 11 minutes, without the car ride, the worm, and her rambling bullshit, the video would be under 8 minutes, and we can't have that.
Some company sent her slime. I don't see a notice about promotional items in this video, Hamber. Three minutes of that shit, skipped.
Lawsuit: No, there is no lawsuit from "Atlantis". It's ATLAS, you dumbass. But it isn't her, it's some other whore named Amber Reid. This is referencing Momma Goob pulled something PACER about an Amber Reid suing Transunion and Atlas cars about a credit report. It is from 2014 and is not Hamber.
And now we get the big lie of the day. Gotta love her absolute need to put some kind of egregious bullshit in. This time, Hamber takes us back to Arizona! Where one day she missed the last bus home, it was "super late" and too far for her to walk home. She approached a cop in some fast food joint and asked him for a ride home. He said yes, but told her he wasn't a taxi service. But he loads her up in the back seat, and while driving, looks her up and says oh, looks like you have some history. And she said, whuuut? Nope, not me! There's yet another whore with her exact name in Tucson. Amazing! She then unironically tells us not to believe everything you see online, because nine times out of ten, it isn't true. Yeah, like this fucking lie you just told, Hamber.
That takes us, thankfully, to the end.
Thanks for indulging my need to rant about Hamber.
