Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

[StrawberryDouche]

I love this so much. It makes sense that instead of referring to 500 pounds, we call it an Amberlynn. I've spent four long, torturous years visualizing her. It actually makes it easier to comprehend other animal sizes. A bull sea lion weighs three Amberlynns; a great white shark can weigh up to 10 Amberlynns; a newborn Asian elephant weighs 1/2 an Amberlynn.

Here's a fun old thread.

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/amberlynn-is-heavier-than.36675/

 

[Salvador Dali]

pack with me, amazon haul, & evacuated my apartment

Spoiler: September 19, 2024 archive

 

[Goatchoker]

Jew-ree box.

Who the fuck brings 4 purses?! Or like 6 different perfumes, a “hygiene bag?” bitch put it in a gallon ziplock.

She’s terrible at packing and traveling and I love it. She also looks fucking AWFUL in this video.

She’s bringing like 4 boxes worth of bandaids. lol gross.

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

True, but in the past, Amber was the one doing the manipulation. She did not want Becky to work and asked her to quit so that she would be with her all the time. With Destiny, she went with her to her job at the old folks home even if she did not work there. Amber is possessive, jealous and suspicious of her girlfriends. However, Emily works outside the home, unlike Jade, she likely has friends that she with keep up with, and sleep at night and is awake during the day. She is unlikely to want to be on facetime all the time, or having a tracker on her phone. Amber will be alone in the house for hours.

The balance of power will shift towards Emily, and it is great that she found the one.

I wonder if Amber would be willing to give up that control due to the fact that her new gorlfriend is interested in her getting bigger, not healthier.
The trade off for not being able to know where Emily is at any given moment is that Emily will not dump Amber because she couldn’t keep up the healthy weightloss journey queen angle à la Jade.
Amber can finally be her authentic, fat, lazy self and just loaf around all day eating waiting for Emily to come home and rub her bellies. It’s a dream come true for her.
Of course this is all because Amber is a narcissist through and through with abandonment issues on top. She will find a way to fuck it up somehow, some way.

 

[Tiresome]

She’s bringing like 4 boxes worth of bandaids. lol gross.

Diabetic sores.

 

[misscunthus]

Two razors for the hairy beast.

Any guesses what she could need an entire roll of trash bags for? Is she gonna pack all her dirty clothes and bring them back home or what?

 

[Mekahineyho]

Buzzball anyone?

 

[dfranki723]

God Piggy is looking fabulously repugnant today.

She's getting real comfortable, quickly too. Took a while before sank into her full slob self with* Jade, Emily must reaaaaally be feeding Hamber's ego and delusions.

 

[Gergg]

Two razors for the hairy beast.

Any guesses what she could need an entire roll of trash bags for? Is she gonna pack all her dirty clothes and bring them back home or what?
View attachment 6433313

That appears to be a roll of dog poop bags. Either for amber or twinkie, that's the real question.

 

[poopinmy_line]

What a beautiful fat neck hump. It doubles as a pillow!

 

[Texas Pete's w1lly]

So happy Amber found the one

The one to put her in an early grave for sure

That is, if she can deliver on whatever backwards bargain she and Slommy made. I imagine it's unspoken but fully understood - if she put feeder bait/porn out before with ex wifey, it's not unreasonable that while not feeder porn, Amby is money esp with the feeder bait the gorlworld has been waiting for, and Hamburglar gets to LARP as an in love highly desired fatty. She can drop the "dainty gorl" persona and rock the HAES train even harder without judgement.
It's a win all around really

 

[Boolean Bitch]

* * * REID ALERT ! ! ! * * *

When we last left our Witless Wonder, Amber was hinting that she would be moving (edit: travelling), taste-testing candy, and reminding everyone how Nikocado Avocado did a video hinting that Amber lied about cancer in order to distract from the fact that Ambo's on her way to finding the 250lbs that Nik lost. What's happening today? Let's find out and get this over with. TAKE US IN!!

Spoiler: pack with me, amazon haul, & evacuated my apartment

"Okay you guize..." Improper intro.

Amber says that she's mooooving, then says she's joking and it's just a trip. We know the truth Ambo; you'll park your fat ass and declare squatter's rights at Slommii's house.

She's a perfectionist, you guize:

She needed to order a travelling jewelry case, to carefully protect her dollar store earings during transit that she otherwise just leaves in a tangled mess in her random junk drawers.

OMG she also never got her HyGiEnE bAg! Oh noes! If only it were possible to put travel-sized bottles of shampoo and soap into ziploc bags! Oh yeah, that's not ky-ute enough.

Wait a minute... is this entire video going to be about her stuffing tarps into a suitcase? OMG

Rarity sighting! 1 of 3 pets accounted for.

Amber went through EVERY piece of clothing she owns, and put anything that fit over *here*:

(That's not what she said, but we all know it's what she meant)

Amber shows all of the crap piled up in her bathroom that she's taking, proving that despite all of her traveling and moving (as well as all of her vlogs about personal care items), she has no idea how to even pretend that she understands anything about hygiene:

Definitely some over-compensation here. Also note how many perfumes and body sprays...

"...razors, I've never used..." surprising no one.
(I know she really means they are brand new - I'm just being a shithead because I can)...

Though in all seriousness, she really should embrace the natural hippie situation-type-deal. Given her lack of dexterity in her hands combined with her infrequency of washing and how easily she gets cellulitis, shaving and getting nicked or even razor burn can be really dangerous for her. I wouldn't shame any woman for deciding not to shave (it's not my body), but I especially wouldn't for Amber due to how stupid she is at taking care of herself. Hopefully she at least uses one of those electric "manscaping trimmers" (BALL-SHAVERS) to help keep those ... trickier areas cleaner in between her bi-monthly bucket baths.

Also, Amber, a little tip: if you truly need *ALL* of this shit - as in, full-sized bottles of all of these items because of how much you go through or how long you'll be with Slommii... you pack a tiny pouch in your purse (travel toothbrush, toothpaste, travel mouthwash, tiny travel soap/bodywash and hand sanitizer) in case your arrival is delayed, and then you buy all of that shit when you get there. I'm sure there's a TAR-JAY (or at the very least a WOMMART) near Slommii. And I'm sure that Slommii has fucking SOAP and QTIPS, Amber. This whole segment is SCREAMING "tween girl on first sleepover who wants to make sure everyone knows how MATURE she is" vibes.

OMG 6 PERFUMES! But she showers, you guize! I was just joking before, but maybe she really IS planning on declaring squatters rights when she gets there!

TWINKIE!! 2 of 3 pets accounted for.

OOPS, Building Management screwed up. Turns out, her HyGiEnE bAg DID arrive, but got lost in the package room! Yay!!

Random sticker haul! She bought them for her savings binder (that she'll never use again).

This is what she was so worried about not getting:

How this is any different than the zippered pouches her giant travel bottles shipped in, I'll never understand.

And ANOTHER bag, because I guess Amber will get confused about the contents of the bag if the bag isn't labelled:

Kill me now.

JUMPCUT: the carry on luggage sized "washbag" combined with the "stuff" bag was not enough to hold all of her crap:

She totally knows how to keep herself clean, you guize! Notice how she packed the full-sized soap containers AND the travel bottles. (Sometimes I do start to worry that I'm actually mocking a bona fide tard with these recaps...)

The "evacuation" was because they had a fire alarm. This time there was an actual fire - which was obviously so minor that this doesn't even matter (as she only found out about it later when she got the email that management sent to every unit).

Amber saw a UFO. She was naturally terrified, given their favourite passtime of MUTILATING COWS. Luckily, Amber was mistaken and it was just a drone. Good thing Slommii doesn't live in Utah.

Amber believes in aliens, but doesn't believe that they are the way that TV portrays them to be. As I am bound by the Prime Directive (when I'm close enough to the Alpha Quadrant for the Federation to see what I'm up to), I won't spoil her delusions.

"Big gorls; big clothes".

Amber's content is shorter because it's 2024 and that's what audiences want (ignoring the fact that her audience keeps asking for longer videos). Amber then admits that she's doing this based on viewer retention, showing that even her few remaining dedicated viewers are getting too burned out with her nontent to sit through it.

"Byee!" Fuck you, Amber.

TL;DR: THIS IS THE WORST NONTENT VIDEO OF HERS I'VE EVER SEEN! DO NOT WATCH - Or at least be ready to skip through about 90% of it. I think all of this was just an excuse to bait her audience into engaging with her channel to talk about how much bigger she's gotten. Amber spends the entire video babbling and trying to pack, giving "tween on her first sleepover and wanting everyone to know how mature she is" vibes. The 20lbs of band-aids and polysporin are for for EXCORIATION DISORDER, not her diabetic wounds, SHITLORD. She had to "evacuate" her apartment for a very short time because there was a small and insignificant fire (that otherwise didn't affect her in any way). Amber saw a UFO. She was naturally terrified, given their favourite passtime of MUTILATING COWS. Luckily, Amber was mistaken and it was just a drone. Rarity and Twinkie sighting; there is still a non-zero chance that Wasabi has been eaten.

Edited to Add:

View attachment 6433761

What a beautiful fat neck hump. It doubles as a pillow!

It looks like she's wearing one of those hydration backpacks under her blouse.

Reminder: MOST feeders have a person they are ACKTUALLEHHHH fucking: Wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, FWB, whatever...

They ARE NOT having the sex with the barely sentient stinky beachball. Amber can't FUCKING WIPE. Don't believe me?? Watch a feeder documentary. Watch the older ones about the old time SSBBW "models." Some of them have admitted/complained about their "admirer" out fucking whoever while they were bedboud.

With feederism, the THRILL is any of these:

1. Ruining a body. Ruining self esteem.
2. Ruining self respect and hygiene.
3. Isolation and dependence.
4. Immobility.
5. The money shot is DEATH.

And Hambutt's layyyyyyyygsssss, stinky ass/body/gooch? Feeders FUCKING LOVE that. They WANNA hear all about fluid leaks, body hair they can't shave, farting, sharting... They want it ALL.

An old (now dead) SSBBW Goddess Patty (look her up) was in a documentary actually telling the interviewer that her "fans" DO want to hear about her sores and ingrown hair and smellz. They feel like they have a hand in "participating."

And I'm not asking--I AM TELLING YOU--this is what Amber's Tommy Slommy is really all about.

And I'm here to LAFF.

Legit psychopaths (feeders)

 

[Constellationzero]

True, but in the past, Amber was the one doing the manipulation. She did not want Becky to work and asked her to quit so that she would be with her all the time. With Destiny, she went with her to her job at the old folks home even if she did not work there. Amber is possessive, jealous and suspicious of her girlfriends. However, Emily works outside the home, unlike Jade, she likely has friends that she with keep up with, and sleep at night and is awake during the day. She is unlikely to want to be on facetime all the time, or having a tracker on her phone. Amber will be alone in the house for hours.

The balance of power will shift towards Emily, and it is great that she found the one.

Reminder: MOST feeders have a person they are ACKTUALLEHHHH fucking: Wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, FWB, whatever...

They ARE NOT having the sex with the barely sentient stinky beachball. Amber can't FUCKING WIPE. Don't believe me?? Watch a feeder documentary. Watch the older ones about the old time SSBBW "models." Some of them have admitted/complained about their "admirer" out fucking whoever while they were bedboud.

With feederism, the THRILL is any of these:

1. Ruining a body. Ruining self esteem.
2. Ruining self respect and hygiene.
3. Isolation and dependence.
4. Immobility.
5. The money shot is DEATH.

And Hambutt's layyyyyyyygsssss, stinky ass/body/gooch? Feeders FUCKING LOVE that. They WANNA hear all about fluid leaks, body hair they can't shave, farting, sharting... They want it ALL.

An old (now dead) SSBBW Goddess Patty (look her up) was in a documentary actually telling the interviewer that her "fans" DO want to hear about her sores and ingrown hair and smellz. They feel like they have a hand in "participating."

And I'm not asking--I AM TELLING YOU--this is what Amber's Tommy Slommy is really all about.

And I'm here to LAFF.

 

[1039]

Reminder: MOST feeders have a person they are ACKTUALLEHHHH fucking: Wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, FWB, whatever...

They ARE NOT having the sex with the barely sentient stinky beachball. Amber can't FUCKING WIPE. Don't believe me?? Watch a feeder documentary. Watch the older ones about the old time SSBBW "models." Some of them have admitted/complained about their "admirer" out fucking whoever while they were bedboud.

With feederism, the THRILL is any of these:

1. Ruining a body. Ruining self esteem.
2. Ruining self respect and hygiene.
3. Isolation and dependence.
4. Immobility.
5. The money shot is DEATH.

And Hambutt's layyyyyyyygsssss, stinky ass/body/gooch? Feeders FUCKING LOVE that. They WANNA hear all about fluid leaks, body hair they can't shave, farting, sharting... They want it ALL.

An old (now dead) SSBBW Goddess Patty (look her up) was in a documentary actually telling the interviewer that her "fans" DO want to hear about her sores and ingrown hair and smellz. They feel like they have a hand in "participating."

And I'm not asking--I AM TELLING YOU--this is what Amber's Tommy Slommy is really all about.

And I'm here to LAFF.

you should give a warning telling people to look up Patty- google goes straight to nudes.

 

[StrawberryDouche]

GORL


That white design spans her entire lower bulk from shelf to shin


lol the WASHBAG is sending me lol

 

[Constellationzero]

you should give a warning telling people to look up Patty- google goes straight to nudes.

Spoiler: No, it doesn't

And Patty was a sad case. Can't remember the name of the documentary, but it was on YouTube. She had a hard time with general washing in the bathroom and replied to the interviewer that her "fans" really did want to hear about her gross TMI issues from being fat (like not being able to shave her pits.

And they caught her on camera crying in bed because she was having an extremely dark day (physical and mental distress). And she let it be known that these so-called fans aren't there to help her or be with her for the not so fun stuff. It was just her son (who she also introduced as her helper/security for her feeder meet sessions).

All this and more--coming up for the Big cherry.

 

[just lurking]

Buzzball anyone?
View attachment 6433333

Godamn she looks AWFUL. If I didn't know better, I'd say that's a 45yo woman

 

[Antiks]

Sweet lord, fat Al is looking rough! Age is really beginning to take its toll on our gorl.

Many years ago she looked like a blubbery quarter ton toddler; all podgy and silly. It was amusing.
But now she just looks bedraggled and knackered, with sacks of old lard hanging off her like melted candle wax, strange fat deposits clinging to the back of her neck, sickly pasty skin and an overall look of defeat as she waddles around in circles packing useless garbage into her suitcase. And she's only what? 33?

Time was always going to ruin her shit eventually. I just wasn't expecting it to be so grim. Seems like her situation type deal is kinda fucked. Love that for her.

 

[Chingo Patingo]

Just look at that stupid fat smug moon face. Filtered to the max ya'll because being a fake sack of lard is what fat Al is all about. Fraudulent to the core.

Naturally she takes up over 3 quarters of the screen, not just because she's a quarter ton mass of decomposing blubber and fupa, but also because she's super important and must dominate every solitary situation type deal. Ridiculous whore.

Slommy looks like a retarded elf who gets moist from feeding dumb cunts to death. I hope she works her magic on the wheezing, shrieking waddler ASAP!

As usual I look forward to Hambeast's early demise.

I've had a rough week and this comment just lifted my soul to the heavens. Thanks, Antiks. For the laughs and the TROOF.

Also, hello everyone. I'm new here. I've been watching Hambone the Hell-hog since 2018 and have grown to just absolutely loathe the two-ton gelatinous mound of shit. I look forward to the day we hear they had to jaws-of-life her bloated carcass out of her apartment.

 

[Lard]

now when I see slommy call AL "baby" I'll imagine all she sees AL as is a useless, needy baby that's helpless and she needs to wipe her ass.

Tommee Tippee