Barb

[DevilDog]

It seems that we have a universal agreement that the death of Borb is the last foreseeable spark in lighting a flaming bonfire of Chris content. So here's the million dolla question:When will she die? My opinion is that she, like Chris, could potentially die at any moment(while the same could be said about anyone, in their case it is a possibility worth considering). I'd give her no more than five years, and probably less than two.

 

[EzioCanLeapofFaith]

Re: Borb

Hm It's hard to say, with their terrible diet I would think she has at least about 10 years top.
But maybe she'll be alive when Chris is still on his 50s since she was much younger than Bob, as far as I know.
Just imagine that...a 50 year old man...still asking his mother for permission to leave the house....

 

[Saney]

Re: Borb

I don't think she's long for this earth. Personally, I'd say a year or two, given her health and age.

 

[Kosher Dill]

Re: Borb

I give her at least a decade, assuming none of the bugs in the house are carrying malaria. People have a way of hanging on, even in states of advanced decrepitude.
I also don't think that 14 Branchland is about to collapse in on itself, or the Chandler cars are about to throw a rod.

 

[Mr. 0]

Re: Borb

This topic reminds me of discussions where people were speculating that Chris would die before he hits 40. XD

 

[Alec Benson Leary]

Re: Borb

You titled this thread rather inaccurately. "Borb" is the term generally used to refer to Bob and Barb collectively, ala a Dragonball-style fusion dance. Borb is gone, only Barb remains.

In answer to your main point, we really don't know enough currently to effectively gauge where her health is at. When we found out she had colitis, it was serious news, because she lost a shit ton of weight in a short period of time and that is never good news for anyone, let alone an elderly person. But that was a while ago, and she still seems to be kicking, so barring further reports there's not a whole lot on which to base any speculation.

 

[Fibonacci]

Re: Borb

In answer to your main point, we really don't know enough currently to effectively gauge where her health is at. When we found out she had colitis, it was serious news, because she lost a shit ton of weight in a short period of time and that is never good news for anyone, let alone an elderly person. But that was a while ago, and she still seems to be kicking, so barring further reports there's not a whole lot on which to base any speculation.

A lot could be said for the fact that it seems she is increasingly unable or unwilling to get around anymore. And that Chris now claims he is taking care of his mom makes the situation sound even more dire. What we do know of Barb is that she barely moves, has a lot of inner rage, eats a lot of junk food (using Chris as a template), she doesn't work, her husband died a year ago and her favourite son is just as sick and deprived as herself, if not more. Among everything that is unhealthy about them, the worst of it all is that these two depressed and angry individuals must be so close to each other. Bob held himself together the best he could and was their last chance to change their ways, as he brought some form of sanity to the household. It doesn't take much speculation to know that going down is much faster than going up, and going up is something neither of them will likely achieve together.

In all fairness, I think she's got a few good years left in her; but I don't think her mind will fare as well as her body - that will be the first thing to go. And I think very soon. Dementia has a way of jumping out of the shadows of isolation and wreaking havoc on the weak and slow like a headcrab in heat.

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

Re: Borb

Just imagine that...a 50 year old man...still asking his mother for permission to leave the house....

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ed_Gein

I'm just joking, of course. I'd never mean to imply Chris is anything like Ed Gein. Chris doesn't sew.

 

[CatParty]

Re: Borb

Just imagine that...a 50 year old man...still asking his mother for permission to leave the house....

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ed_Gein

I'm just joking, of course. I'd never mean to imply Chris is anything like Ed Gein. Chris doesn't sew.

no no not gein. this:

[youtube]an4HXLELr64[/youtube]

 

[JULAY]

Re: Borb

Hm It's hard to say, with their terrible diet I would think she has at least about 10 years top.
But maybe she'll be alive when Chris is still on his 50s since she was much younger than Bob, as far as I know.
Just imagine that...a 50 year old man...still asking his mother for permission to leave the house....

 

[Alec Benson Leary]

Re: Borb

A lot could be said for the fact that it seems she is increasingly unable or unwilling to get around anymore.

I'd say it's just that her lizard brain has taken over and she's nesting in her hoard. Goes way back in our evolution to the days when if you didn't guard your nest, a raccoon might come along and steal your precious thrift store junk.

And that Chris now claims he is taking care of his mom makes the situation sound even more dire.

Well, this from the same manchild who claims he was working as a babysitter and gym leader when all he was doing was playing card games and yelling at kids. He's not "taking care" of his mother, he just goes out and runs errands for her. If he were still updating his resume these days, he'd probably list himself as an experienced home care nurse. And he'd call himself an EMT too, just for good measure.

 

[Butta Face Lopez]

Re: Borb

Hm It's hard to say, with their terrible diet I would think she has at least about 10 years top.
But maybe she'll be alive when Chris is still on his 50s since she was much younger than Bob, as far as I know.
Just imagine that...a 50 year old man...still asking his mother for permission to leave the house....

I owe everything I have to my mother's watchful eye...and swift hand.

 

[DevilDog]

Retitled the thread, I coulda sworn that Borb was a comical name referring to her weight(always made me laugh) I also just googled colitis, MAN that must be one horrid house to live in. ABL is probably right in the sense that we don't have enough to go on, but I think that all things considered, she's probably going to either Aie soon considering all the physical and mental maladies she has. Or B:Hang on to life in the way that so many other unhealthy people do. I go with B, but again, we really don't know, and we tend to overestimate the extent of her various ailments

 

[CatParty]

wait a second. lumbering mongoloid with mommy issues? hates on other people having fun, smoking tobacky and being promiscuous?

 

[DV 259]

OT: Thanks CatParty, I wasn't expecting your post and laughed out loud and it scared my sleeping cat and he bit me.

I don't find it hard to believe at all that Barb may live for a longer time than assumed by other people.

When half of a long-term couple dies, sometimes the other is shortly to follow, but when Bob died, he hadn't been healthy for a while, which Barb had to know, either consciously or subconsciously, that he wasn't long for this world (maybe it started as far back as Bob's first coronary), so she "replaced" him with Chris, to buff the inevitable hurt of Bob dying. (Hell, I did that when we had a scare with my elderly dog and went out and adopted a kitten.) Chris, being Chris, doesn't have the know-how to really be his own person (even though he wants to,) so it created the perfect co-dependency for Barb to feed off of for years to come. Especially after the whole October incident, which she can also lord over him as an excuse that he MUST follow her rules or suffer further embarrassment.

Personally, I think she could go on for a long time; barring Chris doing something drastic and out of character, like packing up his shit, changing his number and moving out in the middle of the night, because she's still got that co-dependency of a "long-term couple" to keep her going.

 

[CatParty]

OT: Thanks CatParty, I wasn't expecting your post and laughed out loud and it scared my sleeping cat and he bit me.

i only meant to amuse, not cause bodily harm!

 

[Henry Bemis]

I'm less interested in when she goes so much as whether or not anyone will care.

"When Barb dies" is nearly always said as a dependent clause, leaving the rest of the sentence to speculate on what sort of trouble Chris will get into afterwards. That a life is ended (a life that many of us have no investment in, sure, nor a life that strikes us as endearing, maybe, but a life nonetheless) is treated as a morbid afterthought.

Will her funeral be properly attended? Will people soften their views of her? Will the CWCki be taken down for a period of mourning?

 

[Alec Benson Leary]

Will her funeral be properly attended? Will people soften their views of her? Will the CWCki be taken down for a period of mourning?

It seems like the extended Chandler/Weston clans have abandoned Barb and Chris, so I doubt the funeral will have many attendants. Probably be made up mostly of well-wishers from their church who go to comfort Chris. The cwcki went down for a bit when Bob died, so the same will probably be done when Barb goes. All depends on how Chris reacts, I guess.

 

[DevilDog]

I'd go if I lived in Ruckersville

 

[93Aiwass]

OT: Thanks CatParty, I wasn't expecting your post and laughed out loud and it scared my sleeping cat and he bit me.

I don't find it hard to believe at all that Barb may live for a longer time than assumed by other people.

When half of a long-term couple dies, sometimes the other is shortly to follow, but when Bob died, he hadn't been healthy for a while, which Barb had to know, either consciously or subconsciously, that he wasn't long for this world (maybe it started as far back as Bob's first coronary), so she "replaced" him with Chris, to buff the inevitable hurt of Bob dying. (Hell, I did that when we had a scare with my elderly dog and went out and adopted a kitten.) Chris, being Chris, doesn't have the know-how to really be his own person (even though he wants to,) so it created the perfect co-dependency for Barb to feed off of for years to come. Especially after the whole October incident, which she can also lord over him as an excuse that he MUST follow her rules or suffer further embarrassment.

Personally, I think she could go on for a long time; barring Chris doing something drastic and out of character, like packing up his shit, changing his number and moving out in the middle of the night, because she's still got that co-dependency of a "long-term couple" to keep her going.

Let us never forget the fact that Barb dragged Bob to the altar. Nor the fact that she pretty much fucked up any child that she was allowed to keep custody of.

Will her funeral be properly attended? Will people soften their views of her? Will the CWCki be taken down for a period of mourning?

It seems like the extended Chandler/Weston clans have abandoned Barb and Chris, so I doubt the funeral will have many attendants. Probably be made up mostly of well-wishers from their church who go to comfort Chris. The cwcki went down for a bit when Bob died, so the same will probably be done when Barb goes. All depends on how Chris reacts, I guess.

I'd attend the funeral, if I had the airfare (depends on how quick Barb kicks off - if she has at least three years left in her, I could see myself going... provided I were able to take care of a few things).