Biggest bullshit in a video game

[Gender: Xenomorph]

People who think Darksouls is hard need to play Megaman.

Less bullshit difficulty there. You won't die cause you didn't see it coming or cause the boss pulled an unchoreographed, one-hit-kill attack.

 

[Book Thief]

People who think Darksouls is hard need to play Megaman.

Less bullshit difficulty there. You won't die cause you didn't see it coming or cause the boss pulled an unchoreographed, one-hit-kill attack.

You're right. Instead, you'll die instantly because you're falling down a tube of spikes and graze a single pixel as you're trying to steer yourself in the air, or you'll get zapped by lasers that appear onscreen after half-a-second on a brand new screen, or because the constantly respawning enemies knock you into a bottomless pit.

Different era, different bullshit.

 

[byuu]

People who think Darksouls is hard need to play Megaman.

You all niggers need to play some shmups instead of mentioning the same ten NES games.

 

[Book Thief]

Speaking of shmups, I might as well mention the 15th Touhou game, Legacy of Lunatic Kingdom. What's bullshit about it? Well, let me show you an excerpt from one of ZUN's interviews:



That's right: ZUN, a guy who makes almost nothing but shmups, a genre defined by being incredibly difficult, was inspired by I Wanna Be The Guy, a game defined by bullshit difficulty, and thus crossed the two ideas together. What this means is that the game has a checkpoint system, similar to how modern games set you back when you die. However, ZUN took this as a blank check to make the most frustratingly bullshit bullet patterns imaginable. We're talking "You have about a quarter of a second to fit through these waves of stars before giant laser beams come from the side of the screen and crush you" levels of insanity.

Clownpiece is a fight designed to piss you off. In fact, it's been argued that she's harder on Normal difficulty than she is on Lunatic.

In short, LoLK has a great story behind it, but actually playing it is an agonizing experience.

 

[Gender: Xenomorph]

Seethe, FagSoftware simps.

Different era, different bullshit.

Possibly, but Megaman doesn't use that cheap difficulty shit on every single corner, and every single fucking boss.

Say what you will about Megaman being BS difficulty, at least it learned. The only difficuty DS has is "Wow look there's an enemy that you had no way of knowing about sniping you way across the room and pushing you into an death trap" or who could forget the intricate and overused "Would it be super fun if this boss who's attacks can all be blocked by a shield had a magical, unblockable, hard to predict attack that kills the player instantly". And it does it for every single room and every single fucking boss. Miles ahead.

In short, LoLK has a great story behind it, but actually playing it is an agonizing experience.

In my experience Touhou shmups have a somewhat consistent difficulty curve and no cheap shots. You will never get struck by a bullet you can't see or can't avoid.

Sure late difficulties are brutal and require nanometric precision, but you can see a death miles ahead when you know what you're doing.

 

[byuu]

Say what you will about Megaman being BS difficulty, at least it learned. The only difficuty DS has is "Wow look there's an enemy that you had no way of knowing about sniping you way across the room and pushing you into an death trap" or who could forget the intricate and overused "Would it be super fun if this boss who's attacks can all be blocked by a shield had a magical, unblockable, hard to predict attack that kills the player instantly". And it does it for every single room and every single fucking boss. Miles ahead.

DS also barely punishes you for a death and dying is woven into the mechanics, story, and world.
Also stop being a shield pussy and learn to roll.

 

[Book Thief]

Seethe, FagSoftware simps.

I don't even play DS games. I'm very much indifferent to them.

In my experience Touhou shmups have a somewhat consistent difficulty curve and no cheap shots. You will never get struck by a bullet you can't see or can't avoid.

Sure late difficulties are brutal and require nanometric precision, but you can see a death miles ahead when you know what you're doing.

LoLK is a different story. I remember the very first time I made it to Junko, and the very second she uses "Lilies of Murderous Intent," is the moment she fires a bullet directly at you, even before her spellcard declaration portrait is off screen. That's a cheap-shot if I've ever seen one.

 

[Gender: Xenomorph]

DS also barely punishes you for a death and dying is woven into the mechanics, story, and world.
Also stop being a shield pussy and learn to roll.

So does IWBTG.

 

[byuu]

So does IWBTG.

If you die every two seconds like in IWBTG, you're worse at it than DSP.

 

[Gender: Xenomorph]

If you die every two seconds like in IWBTG, you're worse at it than DSP.

The principle is, you can only deal with an obstacle once you've encountered it.

And you're heavily penalized for failing to deal with an obstacle.

 

[byuu]

The principle is, you can only deal with an obstacle once you've encountered it.

And you're heavily penalized for failing to deal with an obstacle.

Neither of that is true for DS. Most things are beatable on your first try (I'd say the Capra Demon is an exception - who expects to get immediately rushed by the boss the moment you first enter?). And a death doesn't cost you much since you can just rush through a level once you're familiar with it.

 

[Gender: Xenomorph]

Neither of that is true for DS. Most things are beatable on your first try

Wall Demon is not beatable either. Not because the attacks are hard, but because there's 2 archers you literally cannot know about until you see them.

Also Blight Town dart blowers. And the whole Ren's Fortress or whatever. And the part after... And many more I don't remember.

Also death is a heavy penalty. It forces you to reset (and lose some of your grind).

 

[I got rabies]

Dark Souls is balanced.

I think it has a lot of things that are fair and enemies you can choregraph but also a lot that aren't. Many players will remember the good stuff and less will remember the bullshit. I think Fromsoft is aware of this, aware that they have a lot more fans than haters, and aware that fans will defend them online. So they make a fairly decent job, but allow themselves to indulge in bullshit as much as they can get away with. This is how Dark Souls is balanced.

Also fuck whatever these hand monsters are in Dark Souls 3. Literally no one I know likes them and there's a room full of them, you can't just enter and wave your weapon around. You pretty much have to draw them one by one, try to kill them because they have a lot of health and their grab has a bad hitbox and deals a lot of damage. That's not hard, that's just a pain in the ass and it isn't fun.

 

[Dumpster dived waifu]

I think it has a lot of things that are fair and enemies you can choregraph but also a lot that aren't. Many players will remember the good stuff and less will remember the bullshit. I think Fromsoft is aware of this, aware that they have a lot more fans than haters, and aware that fans will defend them online. So they make a fairly decent job, but allow themselves to indulge in bullshit as much as they can get away with. This is how Dark Souls is balanced.

Oh, if you ask any Souls fan about what they hate in the games or what's bullshit, they'll give you an extensive list. It's 100% "Yeah, the fucking sharkmen in Bloodborne are bullshit, but goddamn that DLC is a fucking 10/10".

 

[Smaug's Smokey Hole]

The principle is, you can only deal with an obstacle once you've encountered it.

And you're heavily penalized for failing to deal with an obstacle.

Not true, I sent(first try) several bosses in DS1 and 2. Including Ornstein and Smaug. I will admit that I used an NPC summon when available and hung back to see how the boss worked before stepping in, but that is intentionally built into the game.

Capra demon would rape my ass repeatedly, that space is so small, foliage and crap will block the camera and the dogs are the real boss.

 

[The Last Stand]

The trees in Forza Horizon 4/5. Wide open world with plenty of roads and space from the countryside. You take a shortcut, BOOM, you hit a tree, killing your momentum. I've lost plenty of races because of misplaced props.



And why is there an achievement for driving on every road?

 

[Articles and Nudes]

Elden Ring has a secret area behind one boss where you have to drop from a series of gravestones, down into a basement area. This is nothing new for the franchise, but the addition of a jump button is.

The game demands pixel perfect jumps and drops, but in return provides a buggy, unresponsive gauntlet that will actively push you away from the platforms if you don't approach from the exact angle you're expected to divine via trial and error. Any mistake will kill you, and even on an SSD the loading time is annoyingly long for what should just be a simple restart.

It's awful, awful, awful, and yet obligatory for one ending.

 

[Shining Wit]

Urotander, Underhanded Rangers in Project Diva X is a bullshit track on Extreme difficulty. A fitting joke, considering the song's subject, but it will slap you in the balls until you learn its tricks.

For those unfamiliar with Project Diva, it's a series of rhythm games. Notes associated with the face buttons fly across the screen and you press them in time to get high scores.
Urotander does everything it can to trick you into messing up, with fun strategies like
- Having the target notes on the outside of screen, then have the notes fly in from that side (instead of the opposite as is usual), giving you little time to react. This at least trains you to watch the target markers for timing
- Throws in random notes occasionally in strings to catch you sleeping
- Ocassionally jumps backwards or changes direction on the string of notes that goes across the screen
- The final hit on Chance Time (which gives you a new Module/costume and a big chunk of Voltage thats often essential to clear the stage) flies in 10x faster to throw you off and potentially screw the stage for you
Everything this song does is Underhanded and it's great. If you're paying attention you can see through its tricks and its not too hard, but your first few plays will be hell

And then you have to do it again with modifiers like the notes vanishing just before you hit them or wobbling across the screen.
There might be harder tracks but none go out of their way to piss you off like this one

 

[The Littlest Shitlord]

Massive bullshit in a game that advertises itself as underhanded? Reminds me of this video, Touhou Project: Unreasonable Mechanism. It's a fangame of the Touhou Project series rather than an official release. It's best to just watch the video, but here's a short list of bullshit:

Spoiler

• bullshit starts before the game even begins; there is a "normal" difficulty mode as the lowest difficulty, but it won't actually let you play it

• one life, no bombs

• the fist that flies up your ass from the BOTTOM of the screen the instant the level starts

• fairies that unexpectedly use Master Spark

• fairies that suddenly explode into a huge explosion that covers most of the screen if not killed in time; the explosion then moves towards you

• 1UPs that kill you when they touch you, actively seek you out, and stick around for an unreasonably long time

• three midbosses at once, each of which is doing their own spellcard

• the time expiring on the spellcard doesn't end it, instead you simply die

• the three midbosses each have a pattern that gets more difficult when one of them is killed; two of the final patterns are not survivable so the easiest midboss has to be saved for last

• fairies that enter from the SIDE of the screen and rush you with an impenetrable energy wall

• the actual boss is unexpectedly fair, except for the part where she enters unannounced from the bottom of the screen at very high speed

 

[Vault Boy]

The trees in Forza Horizon 4/5. Wide open world with plenty of roads and space from the countryside. You take a shortcut, BOOM, you hit a tree, killing your momentum. I've lost plenty of races because of misplaced props.

View attachment 3100314

And why is there an achievement for driving on every road?

Really? From my experience, most of those trees crumble apart whenever I drive into them (unless they're the really thick trees).

In fact, I was pleasantly surprised by how little of a hindrance going offroad is in those games, makes them more fun.