Careercow Brandon "Bam" Margera - From Jackass to Lolcow

[Faggot Gift]

Looking around that Reddit group turns up a second Bam Instagram account for a music project that he forgot about continuing but it’s got some interesting stuff:
Not sure if he started the page on May 13th or if he deleted all his previous posts but this is the earliest. Seems he was butthurt about the Rock And Rol Hall of Fame and wanted to start his own Rock and Roll Awards thingy.
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I'm sure the "Artic Monkeys" are honored to be part of the Earth Rocker Music Awards

 

[TrippinKahlua]

Everything turned to shit when he slept with Jessica Simpson.

 

[Constellationzero]

Looking around that Reddit group turns up a second Bam Instagram account for a music project that he forgot about continuing but it’s got some interesting stuff:
Not sure if he started the page on May 13th or if he deleted all his previous posts but this is the earliest. Seems he was butthurt about the Rock And Rol Hall of Fame and wanted to start his own Rock and Roll Awards thingy.
View attachment 2230505View attachment 2230506
Jess came to visit him AZ in the last week or so, didn’t seem to do him any good and he cares about Bam more than anyone probably. Also explains Jess’ post about how he’ll never give up on him.
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More manifestos:
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Seems this is the origin story of Bam’s accusations against Knoxville. I’m curious who is telling him this because the story seems way too convenient (“I set up this camera and BOOM Johnny Knoxville showed up and started plowing my girlfriend!OMG r u serious Bam you have issues with him too? Holy shit what a coincidence!“) but if it’s legit the world has a funny way of working shit out
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Pure class:
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He’s also really on Kat Von D’s dick but she sucks and is fat so I will not be resposting.

I remember a co-worker from the auto plant I worked at years ago gleefully regaling everyone around him about the time he threw up on a prostitute's pussy. I'll never forget the fallen facial expression followed by the "FUCK YOU!" when I asked what that said about him since he, yanno...chose to fuck her and talk about it like he's sharing tales of Viking exploits around.

I guess holding a mirror up to Bam while he sits tied to a chair won't work as bad as he is. His parents need to do the right thing and rescue the little boy.

 

[DumbDude42]

Like how the fuck do you not shower for so long and do weird injuries and not contract sepsis?

humans are resilient cause we spent a very long time evolving without the comforts of civilisation
if random minor injuries and lack of showering were enough to kill a healthy human then we would have gone extinct ages ago

 

[Lazarus Darlovsky]

Rewatching Viva La Bam. Jesus, Bam lays it hard on Phil about his weight early on but April in episode 3 already said Bam's afraid of turning out like his father lmfaoo

Also, does anyone feel like part of the reason he burned out from / quit editing is due to that particular style practically going extinct? Like, I've been on this kick of rewatching old shit like this and there is definitely a way of editing that totally encapsulates that era. Maybe Bam didn't further hone those skills as he got stunted by drugs, alcohol, and fame

 

[fuckingembarassing]

I kinda think Bam isnt much of a man whore there's a radio bam episode where he says he's fucked 23 girls and he thinks its a lot and too many, he seems like he mainly cares about other dudes but always has a relationship. I seriously recommend listening to literally any Radio Bam episode where it's not a featured guest just the people who lived at Bam's house hanging out, they are so unbearable cringey and disgusting whilst simultaneously have a good camaderie it's insane that any of them still have public facing careers considering. I started listening again off and on still I had forgotten how literally horrible and obnoxious it is and how they talk and act like gross teenagers even tho their all in their 20s. Whoever thought that depiction by chris raab was bad, honestly listen to any of the radio shows.

Some random stuff, Bam talks about going to gay bars in LA and new york cause "theres no drunk frat bros round", one of the steve o episodes he says something about him and Knoxville huffing video cleaner then backtracks, i don't really believe that tbh, episode 68 bam talks about how dogs eat till they puke and someone screams sounds like you! and they all die laughing, and then he goes ya well I didn't purge yet today. multiple episodes little ass kids like 12 year olds call in and they say inappropriate stuff to them. The radio show sure wouldn't be released today.

episode 76 he gets in a argument with his brother screaming about skinny jean and makeup wearing rockers and then just says youre fat quit and retire youre fat quit and retire over and over while his brother says im a nice person im a nice person over and over when he can't argue with him about music which is kinda ironic seeing as how Bam is a lot more in to image than music. He tells a whole bunch of stories that absolutely show how much of a whiney little cunt he is, like going to a gas station and the attendent not wanting to sell him beer cause he has no ID and so he gets mad and throws a tantrum and destroys their post card stand lol. also there's a episode where he talks about how Don Vito is a molester and someone should sue him if he touches them, then like ten or so episodes later (it's episode 84 if you wanna listen to him bitch for a minute and a half) he comes on saying he's too mad to record a radio show today and then screams about how poor don vito is in poor health and its so terrible that he has to spend the last year of his life dealing with money seeking bullshit. also there's a episode where he's like trying to get his mom to tell sex stories, also they laugh about the fact that mark the beggar was caught molesting a 12 year old.

There's literally too much to recount but I seriously recommend listening to these if you're bored and into cringey Bam content, and according to the ppl on the CKY subreddit the first 100 or so episodes are the golden age before it turns in to drunk beligerent Bam for the next 100. If you google radio bam reddit cky a bunch of threads come up of people discussing notable episodes.

Episode 276 is pretty fun also as a standalone Novak gets out of jail and then gets in a fight with some metal singer who was hanging around calls him a fat faggot who looks like Ville Valo on donuts probably around 100 times, they scream at eachother while everyone else laughs that one's kinda a good time for some reason, although theirs always a dynamic of Bam always having someone around to insult and be horrible too, often its Novak but then he steps up in the world. Sorry for writing so much there is literally so much material though that I keep on remembering. Not mentioning anything racist or whatever cause it was the early 2000s but there's a lot of blatant racism also.

Irregardless of all this there are some good bits in there, like Bam hating the amish, some guy having a girlfriend called the smoker from jersey who they all impersonate her rough voice constantly and tell him you can never buy enough cigarettes to satisfy that women, making fun of metalheads etc.

Oh ya also another weird ass thing i remember, novak finds out he's gunna be a dad and announces it on radio and is pretty mean about it and says its by the ugliest broad he's ever seen etc and is playing it off at first then a few episodes later tells a story about how he was crying and freaking out about it and asked bam for help and bam just laughed and called him stupid and told him to just be a deadbeat dad and dont worry about it. theres also a few episodes where bam calls april who you can tell is at the end of her rope with novak saying he needs to get sober or watever and at one point bam say he likes him more when hes fucked up just as long as its not heroin and she tells him hes a shitty friend and selfish and bam immediately gets all pissed and yelly and deeply offended about it, he really can't take critcism of any kind of anything less than anyone kissing his ass.

anyways sorry I wrote so much radio bam is legitimately crazy tho yall I'm surprised its all on youtube and that a lot of these people have public facing careers. oh ya joe frantz would fuck hookers all the time and talked about how he liked it cause he didn't have to be nice to them, I get bad and slimy vibes off that guy even then and all the stories he tells sound like bullshit even by their standards.

 

[Tootsie Bear]

I kinda think Bam isnt much of a man whore there's a radio bam episode where he says he's fucked 23 girls and he thinks its a lot and too many, he seems like he mainly cares about other dudes but always has a relationship. I seriously recommend listening to literally any Radio Bam episode where it's not a featured guest just the people who lived at Bam's house hanging out, they are so unbearable cringey and disgusting whilst simultaneously have a good camaderie it's insane that any of them still have public facing careers considering. I started listening again off and on still I had forgotten how literally horrible and obnoxious it is and how they talk and act like gross teenagers even tho their all in their 20s. Whoever thought that depiction by chris raab was bad, honestly listen to any of the radio shows.

Some random stuff, Bam talks about going to gay bars in LA and new york cause "theres no drunk frat bros round", one of the steve o episodes he says something about him and Knoxville huffing video cleaner then backtracks, i don't really believe that tbh, episode 68 bam talks about how dogs eat till they puke and someone screams sounds like you! and they all die laughing, and then he goes ya well I didn't purge yet today. multiple episodes little ass kids like 12 year olds call in and they say inappropriate stuff to them. The radio show sure wouldn't be released today.

episode 76 he gets in a argument with his brother screaming about skinny jean and makeup wearing rockers and then just says youre fat quit and retire youre fat quit and retire over and over while his brother says im a nice person im a nice person over and over when he can't argue with him about music which is kinda ironic seeing as how Bam is a lot more in to image than music. He tells a whole bunch of stories that absolutely show how much of a whiney little cunt he is, like going to a gas station and the attendent not wanting to sell him beer cause he has no ID and so he gets mad and throws a tantrum and destroys their post card stand lol. also there's a episode where he talks about how Don Vito is a molester and someone should sue him if he touches them, then like ten or so episodes later (it's episode 84 if you wanna listen to him bitch for a minute and a half) he comes on saying he's too mad to record a radio show today and then screams about how poor don vito is in poor health and its so terrible that he has to spend the last year of his life dealing with money seeking bullshit. also there's a episode where he's like trying to get his mom to tell sex stories, also they laugh about the fact that mark the beggar was caught molesting a 12 year old.

There's literally too much to recount but I seriously recommend listening to these if you're bored and into cringey Bam content, and according to the ppl on the CKY subreddit the first 100 or so episodes are the golden age before it turns in to drunk beligerent Bam for the next 100. If you google radio bam reddit cky a bunch of threads come up of people discussing notable episodes.

Episode 276 is pretty fun also as a standalone Novak gets out of jail and then gets in a fight with some metal singer who was hanging around calls him a fat faggot who looks like Ville Valo on donuts probably around 100 times, they scream at eachother while everyone else laughs that one's kinda a good time for some reason, although theirs always a dynamic of Bam always having someone around to insult and be horrible too, often its Novak but then he steps up in the world. Sorry for writing so much there is literally so much material though that I keep on remembering. Not mentioning anything racist or whatever cause it was the early 2000s but there's a lot of blatant racism also.

Irregardless of all this there are some good bits in there, like Bam hating the amish, some guy having a girlfriend called the smoker from jersey who they all impersonate her rough voice constantly and tell him you can never buy enough cigarettes to satisfy that women, making fun of metalheads etc.

Oh ya also another weird ass thing i remember, novak finds out he's gunna be a dad and announces it on radio and is pretty mean about it and says its by the ugliest broad he's ever seen etc and is playing it off at first then a few episodes later tells a story about how he was crying and freaking out about it and asked bam for help and bam just laughed and called him stupid and told him to just be a deadbeat dad and dont worry about it. theres also a few episodes where bam calls april who you can tell is at the end of her rope with novak saying he needs to get sober or watever and at one point bam say he likes him more when hes fucked up just as long as its not heroin and she tells him hes a shitty friend and selfish and bam immediately gets all pissed and yelly and deeply offended about it, he really can't take critcism of any kind of anything less than anyone kissing his ass.

anyways sorry I wrote so much radio bam is legitimately crazy tho yall I'm surprised its all on youtube and that a lot of these people have public facing careers. oh ya joe frantz would fuck hookers all the time and talked about how he liked it cause he didn't have to be nice to them, I get bad and slimy vibes off that guy even then and all the stories he tells sound like bullshit even by their standards.

Good post. Someone fortunately uploaded the complete series of Radio Bam on YouTube so you don't have to dig around for episodes.
Radio Bam Playlist

I'm a huge Jackass fan but the way guys talk to each other is like meeting your childhood hero and discovering they're lowlife douchbags. They let fame go to their head, nature matured and lived a very privileged life of partying while making loads of money goofing off.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

I kinda think Bam isnt much of a man whore there's a radio bam episode where he says he's fucked 23 girls and he thinks its a lot and too many, he seems like he mainly cares about other dudes but always has a relationship. I seriously recommend listening to literally any Radio Bam episode where it's not a featured guest just the people who lived at Bam's house hanging out, they are so unbearable cringey and disgusting whilst simultaneously have a good camaderie it's insane that any of them still have public facing careers considering. I started listening again off and on still I had forgotten how literally horrible and obnoxious it is and how they talk and act like gross teenagers even tho their all in their 20s. Whoever thought that depiction by chris raab was bad, honestly listen to any of the radio shows.

Some random stuff, Bam talks about going to gay bars in LA and new york cause "theres no drunk frat bros round", one of the steve o episodes he says something about him and Knoxville huffing video cleaner then backtracks, i don't really believe that tbh, episode 68 bam talks about how dogs eat till they puke and someone screams sounds like you! and they all die laughing, and then he goes ya well I didn't purge yet today. multiple episodes little ass kids like 12 year olds call in and they say inappropriate stuff to them. The radio show sure wouldn't be released today.

episode 76 he gets in a argument with his brother screaming about skinny jean and makeup wearing rockers and then just says youre fat quit and retire youre fat quit and retire over and over while his brother says im a nice person im a nice person over and over when he can't argue with him about music which is kinda ironic seeing as how Bam is a lot more in to image than music. He tells a whole bunch of stories that absolutely show how much of a whiney little cunt he is, like going to a gas station and the attendent not wanting to sell him beer cause he has no ID and so he gets mad and throws a tantrum and destroys their post card stand lol. also there's a episode where he talks about how Don Vito is a molester and someone should sue him if he touches them, then like ten or so episodes later (it's episode 84 if you wanna listen to him bitch for a minute and a half) he comes on saying he's too mad to record a radio show today and then screams about how poor don vito is in poor health and its so terrible that he has to spend the last year of his life dealing with money seeking bullshit. also there's a episode where he's like trying to get his mom to tell sex stories, also they laugh about the fact that mark the beggar was caught molesting a 12 year old.

There's literally too much to recount but I seriously recommend listening to these if you're bored and into cringey Bam content, and according to the ppl on the CKY subreddit the first 100 or so episodes are the golden age before it turns in to drunk beligerent Bam for the next 100. If you google radio bam reddit cky a bunch of threads come up of people discussing notable episodes.

Episode 276 is pretty fun also as a standalone Novak gets out of jail and then gets in a fight with some metal singer who was hanging around calls him a fat faggot who looks like Ville Valo on donuts probably around 100 times, they scream at eachother while everyone else laughs that one's kinda a good time for some reason, although theirs always a dynamic of Bam always having someone around to insult and be horrible too, often its Novak but then he steps up in the world. Sorry for writing so much there is literally so much material though that I keep on remembering. Not mentioning anything racist or whatever cause it was the early 2000s but there's a lot of blatant racism also.

Irregardless of all this there are some good bits in there, like Bam hating the amish, some guy having a girlfriend called the smoker from jersey who they all impersonate her rough voice constantly and tell him you can never buy enough cigarettes to satisfy that women, making fun of metalheads etc.

Oh ya also another weird ass thing i remember, novak finds out he's gunna be a dad and announces it on radio and is pretty mean about it and says its by the ugliest broad he's ever seen etc and is playing it off at first then a few episodes later tells a story about how he was crying and freaking out about it and asked bam for help and bam just laughed and called him stupid and told him to just be a deadbeat dad and dont worry about it. theres also a few episodes where bam calls april who you can tell is at the end of her rope with novak saying he needs to get sober or watever and at one point bam say he likes him more when hes fucked up just as long as its not heroin and she tells him hes a shitty friend and selfish and bam immediately gets all pissed and yelly and deeply offended about it, he really can't take critcism of any kind of anything less than anyone kissing his ass.

anyways sorry I wrote so much radio bam is legitimately crazy tho yall I'm surprised its all on youtube and that a lot of these people have public facing careers. oh ya joe frantz would fuck hookers all the time and talked about how he liked it cause he didn't have to be nice to them, I get bad and slimy vibes off that guy even then and all the stories he tells sound like bullshit even by their standards.

I honestly think Don Vito touched Bam in no-no places and that’s part of the reason he’s so fucked in the head about sex and gay stuff. Maybe it’s also why he always wants someone less powerful around him to pick on and exert dominance/cruelty. Learned behavior.

His fixation on being fat is truly strange in its severity. I get not wanting to be a fat Italian blimp like his dad and uncle, but theres way more than that. Most guys would just become gym rats to avoid getting fat.

It’s really rare for a teen guy/adult man to have a classic ED like bulimia. However, when a man does have bulimia/anorexia they are almost always gay. All of the rare examples of male anorexia/bulimia I can think of were gay men.

 

[Bowl of Ramen]

Everything turned to shit when he slept with Jessica Simpson.

Now I just have this image of him banging Jonathan Yaniv in his rotten ditch. Thanks.

 

[STN]

the milk from this lolcow is a little sour.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

I remember in interviews they mentioned his mum doing up the old house and that it'd take her a year. She has a furniture restoration business or something aling those lines, so I'd infer from that that she did most of the work herself. Still doesn't make it free, but it would have saved them a bank on contractors. His dad has also been his accountant since before the VLB days so they'd be free to liquidate any assets in their names (like the Lamborghini) to keep him above water. I dont think he's in a great position but it's probably much better than it should be. The best thing to do at this stage might be to hold back whatever's left and use it to send Phoenix to a good college in 15 years, rather than letting Bam continue to piss his money away on failed stints in rehab and subsequent binges.

Even if he didn't have his parents, I don't think it's possible for Bam to go broke enough to stop him being messy. He's famous enough that even if he had nothing to his name he'd still be able to bum drinks and a few lines off similarly trashy people willing to hang out with him.

Furniture restoration doesn’t make remodeling and rehabbing a “party house” any cheaper, just the furniture you stick in it once it’s done. Drywall, paint, Mexicans, kitchen cabinets and carpeting cost and it’s a big ass house.

I think a college fund for poor Phoenix might be as wasted as rehab funds for Bam. Looking back through Bam’s guilt trips about needing money for Phoenix I’m picking up the vibe that they know something is “off” and it’s why a fund is needed for him.

Google Jan Michael Vincent. Bam can only run off the fumes of his old fame for so long. It will only take a few years of being a broke, smelly, addict spouting gibberish to make him an object of pity that is avoided by all. It might get him a beer or 40 Oz of pity purchased, but there reaches a point that no one will care about his past just the reality of the smelly, drunk, incoherent bum before them. You’d be surprised at how poorly he will be regarded once he’s been truly broke for awhile. People already comment about how awful he stinks. There’s no way Bam can overcome the trifecta of stench, alcoholism/mental illness and being broke - it will make him a pariah.

A big part of his fame is that he owns a big mansion, skate park and lambo…once all that’s gone the hanger- ons and party crowd disappear quick smart. No more blood in the water. It’s really the money that offers some measure of protection and attracts people hoping for some table scraps, not so much his past-fame. Being a poor former-celebrity alcoholic is a really shitty career path.

 

[Rogowski]

I kinda think Bam isnt much of a man whore there's a radio bam episode where he says he's fucked 23 girls and he thinks its a lot and too many, he seems like he mainly cares about other dudes but always has a relationship.

Bam also speaks about this in his podcast interview with The Nine Club from 2017, at 1:15:00 he talks about being passed out drunk and getting raped by a fat chick during an explanation for always having a girlfriend was because he always met someone new immediately being that he was a famous celebrity and he couldn't bring himself to end it because his feelings for her were stronger than his desire to be a man whore.

This was back right around the time of his Epicly Later'd episode and he was clean and skating full-time in Spain. At the time the industry was finally welcoming him back after selling out and he was poised to pull off a full career revival and this interview is interesting and sad all at once because this is the last time the public saw a clean and sober Bam who wasn't trying to feed anyone any bullshit and spoke candidly and honestly about his entire life up to that point.

 

[Big Nasty]

Who the hell would want to receive the "Bam Margera is hella gay for me & my band" trophy pimp cup?

 

[Xenomorph]

Found on Reddit, this is the quality tail he’s chasing around strip clubs, sad!
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This is allegedly the girl he followed to Arizona but no confirmation. Apologies for linking to Reddit but I can’t upload video on mobile for whatever reason and she seems to have deleted her post.

ETA: Another post by AZ stripper girl that was deleted and reuploaded to Twitter. Bam has a ton of dry blood coming from his ear and she is straight up disrespecting this guy for clout. Can’t feel bad, this is the bed he made for himself.

everything happens for a reason is right... christ that troon is nasty

 

[Bubble Ba'ath]

Now I just have this image of him banging Jonathan Yaniv in his rotten ditch. Thanks.

This is where it is going to end up at the present rate of decline.

 

[Hollywood Hitler]

Rewatching Viva La Bam. Jesus, Bam lays it hard on Phil about his weight early on but April in episode 3 already said Bam's afraid of turning out like his father lmfaoo

Yeah, but he ended up turning out as Don Vito. Phil may be a fat Italian guy, but at least he isn't a fat degenerate boozer who molests 15 year olds like Vito was. Phil's only flaw besides his weight is having put up with Bam's shit for so long/not putting him in his place sooner.

 

[Drowningman]

I doubt even if he wrote an auto biography if any publisher would want to distribute it now.
He is on his way to a grave within the next 3 years if not from heart or other medical problems,if not an OD first.

 

[Fancy Carstairs]

do y'all think he has any limits or would he take whatever drug was offered to him?

 

[break these cuffs]

do y'all think he has any limits or would he take whatever drug was offered to him?

I think he has some limits as in he hasn't hit rock bottom yet because he has some fame and money. He'd probably take any thing in the right situation like if he's been partying and you're a tranny stripper. I don't think you could just walk up to him on the street and go "Take these pills pillhead". Once he's broke it's going to be a race to see whether he overdoses from semen or fent after he realizes you can suck dick for smack.

His parents probably won't let that happen, but I wonder what they'll do when he's completely broke. They've been wiping his ass his entire life. Are they beaten down enough that they'll be a little bit relieved when he slips into the gutter and is no longer their problem?

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

I doubt even if he wrote an auto biography if any publisher would want to distribute it now.
He is on his way to a grave within the next 3 years if not from heart or other medical problems,if not an OD first.

Oh, sure he could, it’s probably the only remaining career path option in media he’s got right now.

Bam’s already published vanity books. He and Novak even published an “addiction memoir” five years ago before Novak was actually clean. They both were happy to pose as sobriety experts to sell books without actually being sober.

Obviously Bam can’t fucking write, he’s got the literacy of a tween. Like most celebs they hire someone to ghost write a book targeted for the demographic they think Bam appeals to. The book he did publish some years ago was just an embarrassing collection of his cringe poetry, scribbles, drawings, etc… I could def see him submitting a book in strogoli to a publisher.

However, if Bam actually got clean and sober for more than a year he could easily get a book deal detailing all his sordid partying, the “struggle to get clean”. Shit every washed up hair metal band member from the 80’s managed to get a book deal using this formula. If Bam threw in a whole chapter about Don Vito molesting him he could probably crack into the chick-lit abuse/tragedy porn demo too

The one way a trainwreck dumpster fire like Bam can now salvage his career is to sell a redemption story. It’s pretty much his only option for a career path now IF he ever manages to sober up.

He’d also have to humble himself for a big public apology tour after all the nasty shit he’s done and said. (Make no mistake, while he’s been a ugly cunt to Knoxville, Novak and Terrmaine, but he’s been an abusive monster to his family and his kid. But because he made such a public spectacle of his shit with the Dickhouse crew he’d have make some theater out of apologizing and all his bros forgiving him for public consumption and applause. Probably do the morning talk show circuit and add Drew interview.

I honestly don’t think Bam’s ego could handle getting sober and accepting what incredible mess he’s made of his life. I don’t think he can ever admit he was wrong. It would take an almost super-human personality change that I just can’t see happening. I think he’d rather drink himself to death in the gutter