Lovequest CD for new sweetheart

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Friday the Today said:
This might be a moronic idea, but is it possible that the girlfriend is the field agent?
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No.
skyraider91 said:
It appears that perhaps Chris has latched onto some unfortunate local woman, and thinks that she's his girlfriend, just like what happened with The Wallflower. I censored the woman's name to protect her privacy.
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Elbow-greased strongman said:
I spoke to my sister about this, who as a very diesel dyke is my go-to person for all things LGBTQETC; and she said that three quarters is sometimes a a stage in gender reassignment surgery. She posits that Chris' mystery woman may have joked something like, "I'm not all woman yet, just three quarters ha ha!".

Seems that crossdressing and gender identity confusion are stage 1, total surgical and lifestyle changes are stage 4, stages 2 and 3 being less defined but characterized by at least hormone shots and/or surgery. So three quarters could be a male who has undergone hormone therapy so is more feminine in manner and appearance, dresses, has breasts, and has a penis.
Of course, this is all just speculation. "Three quarters" just be a CWCism that like the others is not grounded (or should I say, not ground-up) from reality.
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The problem is with no matter how much therapy, surgery and hormone treatments Chris may have if he goes that route, is that he is still going to look like a drag queen.
 
bigshot said:
Now THAT'S a romantic song for ya! Here are the lyrics...
*snip*
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According to Wikipedia, Thomas Pynchon referred to the song as "the nadir of all American expression". Can't see why though!
 
Guys, Chris' new "sweetheart" (probably) isn't a transwoman. He took the old saying "two halves make a whole" and altered it for his purpose. Because his "sweetheart" is a girl and he's currently identifying as a male lesbian he thinks their "whole" is 3/4th woman and 1/4th man. Thus, three-quarter woman.
 
As an 80s music enthusiast it is horrible to see Centerfold in this CD. I mean, that wonderful awesome song playing alongside garbage from MLP and Puffy ami Yumi or whatever the fuck its called? Man.
 
So, does Chris know his "sweetheart" dumped his mix CD in the trash?
 
trombonista said:
So, does Chris know his "sweetheart" dumped his mix CD in the trash?
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Since he reads these forums every day, he does now.

Also, now that I've had time to process this, and assuming that Chris's "girlfriend" isn't just a girl who works at McD's he's stalking, and she chucked this disk in the garbage the instant she was out of Chris's field of vision, than this is going to get interesting when he confronts her about it tomorrow.
 
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Damocles_Sword said:
Since he reads these forums every day, he does now.

Also, now that I've had time to process this, and assuming that Chris's "girlfriend" isn't just a girl who works at McD's he's stalking, and she chucked this disk in the garbage the instant she was out of Chris's field of vision, than this is going to get interesting when he confronts her about it tomorrow.
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The thread was started yesterday. He probably has already confronted her.
 
skyraider91 said:
View attachment 6142
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Granted, Chris can't draw, but looking at the picture of two women with shattered pelvises and halos, and given the name of the album... Is his new girlfriend handicapped? Maybe she's missing a member and the two women are family members who were killed in the car accident that maimed her.
I may be reading too much into this.
 
Chris has the wrong Bonnie Tyler song on there. I would laugh my ass off if he had Ravishing on there :hulk:
 
bigshot said:
Now THAT'S a romantic song for ya! Here are the lyrics...

Way down in the Congoland
Lived a happy chimpanzee
She loved a monkey with long tail
(Lordy, how she loved him)

Each night he would find her there
Swinging in the coconut tree
And the monkey gay at the break of day
Loved to hear his chimpie say

"Aba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Said the chimpie to the monk
"Baba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Said the monkey to the chimp

All night long they'd chatter away
All day long there were happy and gay
Swinging and singing in their hunky tonky way

"Aba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Means 'Monk, I love but you'
'Baba, daba, dab' in monkey talk
Means 'Chimp, I love you, too'

Then the big baboon one night in June
He married them and very soon
Since they came from their aba daba honeymoon

"Aba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Said the chimpie to the monk
"Baba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Said the monkey to the chimp

All night long they'd chatter away
All day long there were happy and gay
Swinging and singing in their hunky tonky way

"Aba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Means 'Monk, I love but you'
'Baba, daba, dab' in monkey talk
Means 'Chimp, I love you, too'

One night they were made man and wife
And now they cry, "This is the life"
Since they came from their aba daba honeymoon

Well, you should have heard that band
Play upon their wedding day
Each chimp and monkey had nutshells

(Lordy, how they played them)
And now it is ev'ry night
High up in the coconut tree

It's the same old thing
With the same old swing
When the monk and chimpie sing

"Aba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Said the chimpie to the monk
"Baba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Said the monkey to the chimp

All night long they'd chatter away
All day long there were happy and gay
Swinging and singing in their hunky tonky way

"Aba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Means 'Monk, I love but you'
'Baba, daba, dab' in monkey talk
Means 'Chimp, I love you, too'

Then the big baboon one night in June
He married them and very soon
Since they came from their aba daba honeymoon

"Aba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Said the chimpie to the monk,
"Baba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Said the monkey to the chimp

All night long they'd chatter away
All day long there were happy and gay
Swinging and singing in their hunky tonky way

"Aba, daba, daba, daba, daba, daba, dab"
Means 'Monk, I love but you'
'Baba, daba, dab' in monkey talk
Means 'Chimp, I love you, too'

One night they were made man and wife
And now they cry, "This is the life"
Since they came from their aba daba honeymoon
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He may as well have just skipped all the cutesy pretense and just put this on the CD:

 
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CWCissey said:
Not nearly enough Smiths.

I am disappoint.
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Here, lemme fill that void in your life

Sing to the Tune of "How Soon is Now?"


I'm Mayor
Grand Direcktor
of a toontown without an election
I am the son and heir
of elbow greased perfection

shut your dang mouth
Why de trolls sayyyyy
I'm a dirty rotten homo-gayyyyyy
I am Maaaaaaayor and was promised sum love
But not the kind ya can't speak of

I'm Mayor
Grand Direcktor
of a toontown without an election
I am the son and heir
of elbow greased perfection

shut your dang mouth
Why de trolls sayyyyy
I'm a dirty rotten homo-gayyyyyy
I am Maaaaaayor and was promised sum love
But not the kind ya can't speak of

To Da Game Place, I'd like to go
I once met a sweetheart who really loved me
So I went, and da Jew kicked me outttttt
But I howled, I shouted and poutttttt
Called him a Jew loutttttt
I went home
and I Kwy
and I want Snyder to die

Godbear promised me a grand of chiiiina
When exakly he gonne gimme?
See I already waited a grand number of hours
and I'm really getting mad.


edit: i tried to CWCify "Vicar in a Tutu" but that one is trickier.
 
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I doubt that very serious Chris' girlfriend is a transwoman. He is still a homophobe no matter what he says.

If she is not a troll, it is more likely she is a special snowflake who uses a alternate gender pro-noun she found on tumblr
 
AtroposHeart said:
I doubt that very serious Chris' girlfriend is a transwoman. He is still a homophobe no matter what he says.

If she is not a troll, it is more likely she is a special snowflake who uses a alternate gender pro-noun she found on tumblr
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Nah, he's an androphobe. Chris would totally be down with fucking a transwoman.
 
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