Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History

[Dread First]

I wouldn't even want him to bag my groceries, ffs. Used to have a retard at the grocery store I went to growing up. Would put the eggs on the bottom of the bag and follow us out sometimes, terrifying. Still probably was more competent than Chris would be, though.

Ex-retail employee gripe that everyone has but no one ever fucking brings up on social media because talking shit about actual tards hasn't been in vogue since the early 2010s.

You ever had a fucking bus come straight from a group home? It's not uncommon if you're working the day shift in a customer-facing retail job to have buses or paratransit vans drop off an assload of them at once with two or three tard wranglers assigned to manage them all. It gives them a way to actually spend what little disposable income they have while also breaking up the monotony of the group home setting.

The problem of course is that you have half a dozen to a dozen cognitively impaired people being managed by an endlessly revolving line of new tard wranglers. Believe me, the turnover rate for those places are fucking high for a reason. The tards never change, but their wranglers always do and it's extremely uncomfortable to have to tell the tard wrangler to do their goddamn job when the autist in question is holding up the line.

For every tard capable of holding down menial work, there's like 10 who aren't capable of that in the most literal sense possible and they just exist to piss off healthcare workers and retail workers around the country. Chris was pretty much damned to end up in the latter group by the time he left high school.

 

[Jon Osterman]

Also, among his many delusions, it's particularly startling that he continues to believe Ted Bundy is innocent. Imagine if the idea guys tried to make Chris believe Hitler was innocent? With this, it's prevalent that Chris and the internet is like oil and water. Regardless of the content output, Chris shouldn't use it.

I never figured out why Chris started believing Ted Bundy was innocent. It sounds like something the Idea Guys would tell him especially since they also teamed Bundychu up with Robertchu, but I never heard anyone directly attribute it to them.

 

[Dread First]

I never figured out why Chris started believing Ted Bundy was innocent. It sounds like something the Idea Guys would tell him especially since they also teamed Bundychu up with Robertchu, but I never heard anyone directly attribute it to them.

Bundy was one of the Idea Guys' machinations. @Marvin made an excellent post about why Chris clings to their canons so willingly, and it really boils down to the proverbial Morton's Fork:

When given the possibility of retconning all of the Idea Guys' changes to his imaginary canon, what does Chris do?

(a) acknowledge that his fantasy is indeed that - fantasy, and retcon the changes because hey, nothing stopped him from retconning shit before so why stop now?

(b) Maintain the changes the Idea Guys made, regardless of whether or not he likes them, because to confront reality now would be too painful?

It's obvious to see which side of the fork he went down.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

For every tard capable of holding down menial work, there's like 10 who aren't capable of that in the most literal sense possible and they just exist to piss off healthcare workers and retail workers around the country. Chris was pretty much damned to end up in the latter group by the time he left high school.

Pretty much. Once the Wendy's/PVCC experiment failed Bob applied Chris with SSDI, which ended up making Chris lazy. There was a story of Chris holding up a line at a convenience store because he was holding up the line and couldn't do basic addition. I was surprised the cashiers didn't call the cops on Chris for theft (he took some items plus the money other customers gave Chris to try and complete his purchase), but I think the customers behind Chris paid.

Chris has been pretty lucky up until now. Had both Bob and Barb died when Chris was in his late 20s, he would've been fucked. At this point, he is. Chris will be in those group of tards being wrangled and will be holding up many lines and going through worker after worker.

I would blame Chris (I mean, it's still his fault), but I blame Borb (more over Barb) for jeopardizing and sabotaging Chris' future. Bob's worst fears will have come true, and Chris will end up in a horrible situation and that's because of his and Barb's lack of parenting.

 

[Tangie]

Crazy how close those clips at the end of part 68 were to what he would do in the golden era. The overall theme of the last half was sad, but I definitely enjoyed seeing Chris rage again.

 

[The Dude]

Pretty much. Once the Wendy's/PVCC experiment failed Bob applied Chris with SSDI, which ended up making Chris lazy. There was a story of Chris holding up a line at a convenience store because he was holding up the line and couldn't do basic addition. I was surprised the cashiers didn't call the cops on Chris for theft (he took some items plus the money other customers gave Chris to try and complete his purchase), but I think the customers behind Chris paid.

Chris has been pretty lucky up until now. Had both Bob and Barb died when Chris was in his late 20s, he would've been fucked. At this point, he is. Chris will be in those group of tards being wrangled and will be holding up many lines and going through worker after worker.

I would blame Chris (I mean, it's still his fault), but I blame Borb (more over Barb) for jeopardizing and sabotaging Chris' future. Bob's worst fears will have come true, and Chris will end up in a horrible situation and that's because of his and Barb's lack of parenting.

I thought that Bob got Chris on SSDI when he was younger, like in late high school, and would have already been on SSDI when he was in college and Wendy's?

Also, it was pretty cool to see one of my posts shown in the latest video. Thanks Geno!

 

[Hogar Grupal]

I thought that Bob got Chris on SSDI when he was younger, like in late high school, and would have already been on SSDI when he was in college and Wendy's?

Like many others, I assumed that due to the mainstreaming, Borb (or Bob at least) would get Chris to make money the normal way. So the timeline that I was thinking of was Wendy's/Cutco---PVCC---SSDI. I believe Bob hoped that when Chris graduated from college, he would use one of his connections in General Electric to get Chris a job. That didn't work, so Bob turned to SSDI.

 

[Ophelia]

Chris would have been better off institutionalized or put in a home in his 20s rather than continue living with Borb.

(Edited for grammar)

 

[Jack Awful]

I didn't see that CWC psychologist thing going any other way. The Farms is merciless to idiots like him.

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/wellness-check.52029/post-4181216

What did @Mr. 0 know?!?!

 

[Windsock]

What did @Mr. 0 know?!?!

Too much apparently..

 

[Hogar Grupal]

Chris would have been better off institutionalized or put in a home in his 20s than living with Borb.

Chris living with his parents as long as he did just prolonged their suffering.

 

[Mr. 0]

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/wellness-check.52029/post-4181216

What did @Mr. 0 know?!?!
View attachment 3750150

why the fuck do I have so many stickers in this post?

 

[Huge Fuckin Nerd]

2019 huh? We’re really coming up to the end now. Any bets on when the series will end? I’m thinking January, episode 74ish. Assuming Geno sticks to his regular schedule and doesn’t make any special mega episodes

 

[Jack Awful]

2019 huh? We’re really coming up to the end now. Any bets on when the series will end? I’m thinking January, episode 74ish. Assuming Geno sticks to his regular schedule and doesn’t make any special mega episodes

What if Chris is released and continues being a cow?

 

[Huge Fuckin Nerd]

What if Chris is released and continues being a cow?

I think the doc is taking a hard stop at his arrest, and won’t even go into the prison saga much if at all. I don’t think there’s enough to script a proper episode around. You can already see geno struggle with post idea guys dimensional merge stuff. It’s just Twitter posts and incoherent rambling until Chris gets arrested.


The arrest episode is going to be a doozy though. Chris getting excited for Everfree. Null’s donation drive. And then BAM, the audience gets slammed with the ILJ call and the fallout from that. If Geno decides to end on Chris’ arrest, I really hope it’s a feature length episode detailing the events leading up to the call. Hopefully he’ll break chronological order to maintain the impact of the reveal.

 

[Cuntspiracy Man]

Imagine if the idea guys tried to make Chris believe Hitler was innocent

it probably wouldn't work solely because ''Hitler'' and ''Nazis'' are most people's first thought when they think of something historically evil, it's prevalent in most media and gets taught as early in school as possible
remember, the guy likes things like South Park and has made ''nazi zombie'' jokes before, and has described WW2 as being ''yuck''
that stuff is ingrained in him even if he doesn't understand WHY

iirc that's exactly why he was told nazis of all people are invading Equestria, if they tried using any other group of note, like commies or ISIS, he wouldn't be able to comprehend the weight of that or what those groups of capable of, but nazis are an easy evil

 

[Jack Awful]

No wonder Chris likes to delude himself as younger than he is. Doesn't surprise me that he still views himself as a 21 year old while just turning 40. Now that you mention it, Chris was one year away into going into his 'tomgirl phase'

Also, among his many delusions, it's particularly startling that he continues to believe Ted Bundy is innocent. Imagine if the idea guys tried to make Chris believe Hitler was innocent? With this, it's prevalent that Chris and the internet is like oil and water. Regardless of the content output, Chris shouldn't use it.

They kinda did. They kept trying to slip in Nazi references like operation Barb-arossa (the Nazi plan for invading Russia) and all that stuff about camps for undesirables with dentists and warm ovens.

 

[Jeff_the_Thriller]

I would blame Chris (I mean, it's still his fault), but I blame Borb (more over Barb) for jeopardizing and sabotaging Chris' future. Bob's worst fears will have come true, and Chris will end up in a horrible situation and that's because of his and Barb's lack of parenting.

I think if Chris had not shitty parents he would have been a moderately productive member of society. He wouldn't have been a doctor or software designer but if he had any sort of work ethic, I could picture him doing some mindless data entry job. He would be the office weirdo who is a brony neckbeard but would at least contribute to society.

His parents didn't the opposite of how parents should raise their kid, like it was some kind of fucked up psychological experiment. They taught him to be helpless and because he's autistic the world owes him. I hate to victim blame but Barb caught what almost 40 years of coddling and manipulating will do to a child.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

His parents didn't the opposite of how parents should raise their kid, like it was some kind of fucked up psychological experiment. They taught him to be helpless and because he's autistic the world owes him. I hate to victim blame but Barb caught what almost 40 years of coddling and manipulating will do to a child.

That's what I believe Borb's mainstreaming was. It was an experiment to see if Chris, given his shortcomings would manage in the real world, and it failed. The first thing Borb should have taught Chris is boundaries and proper respect for authority. He was getting in trouble with managers and police before he was found on the internet. What did Borb do? Side with Chris and and blamed everyone else. Unfortunately, they just let whatever Chris did and Chris, in turn, followed his parents (mainly his mother's) worst tendencies. I don't think Barb will ever admit how she raised Chris was wrong or bad. Barb loves Chris as any mother would/should, but I think there is some resentment/hatred of how Chris turned out, and again, it was due to her parenting. It was stupid on Barb's part thinking she can manipulate Chris for as long as she did, and would never think he'd turn on her.

 

[PhoBingas]

I think if Chris had not shitty parents he would have been a moderately productive member of society. He wouldn't have been a doctor or software designer but if he had any sort of work ethic, I could picture him doing some mindless data entry job. He would be the office weirdo who is a brony neckbeard but would at least contribute to society.

His parents didn't the opposite of how parents should raise their kid, like it was some kind of fucked up psychological experiment. They taught him to be helpless and because he's autistic the world owes him. I hate to victim blame but Barb caught what almost 40 years of coddling and manipulating will do to a child.

Bob and Barb really didn't do chris any favors. I feel Bob was delusional thinking that Chris would be successful in even community college. They sheltered him a little too hard. Maybe if he had some sort of early intervention or was put in a school for autists or something he would have got a bit more support. Bob and Barb had a like 1930's idea of mental health and figured chris would get locked up if they tried to "get help". Granted in the 80s and 90s there wasn't much available.
I found this episode to be a bit of a drag. We've reached the "Chris pisses into the winds of Twitter" saga, and he really wasn't funny anymore. Chris was turning into another twitter troon that just raged into the void all day.