Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History

[Second-Hand Boat Supplies]

But what we do know is that he's an extreme leftist.

Yeah, sure. Chris' critiques of capitalism, existing power structures, and the concept of private property in general are dead giveaways of his leftist beliefs. I remember the classic video where he releases a powerful curse-yea-ha-me-ha against the bourgeoise.

Oh wait, no, I remembered that wrong. None of that happened since Chris has the mind of a nine year old without a single coherent political thought beyond whatever he individually feels like doing at any given minute. Just because ideologies exist that would validate Chris' self-identification doesn't mean that Chris is a member of any of them. He wasn't a fascist when he was screaming about killing all the gays, he isn't a 'leftist' when he believes he's a goddess, he's just stupid. I think you have to be capable of remembering the three branches of government to have any kind of meaningful political label applied

 

[Jason Wynn]

Chris doesn't hold a coherent political ideology.

Like @AmazingEagle said, he’s an extreme leftist. Leftism, incoherent political ideology, same thing

 

[Second-Hand Boat Supplies]

Like @AmazingEagle said, he’s an extreme leftist. Leftism, incoherent political ideology, same thing

I'd really love to hear the Kiwi Farms political science department explain how Chris is an 'extreme leftist.' If Chis is an extreme leftist, then my Labrador is a reactionary since he growls at strange dogs. Both have equal capacity for political thought.

 

[Chinese LeBron James]

Like @AmazingEagle said, he’s an extreme leftist. Leftism, incoherent political ideology, same thing

I think its fair to say he's socially a leftist or whatever but that's just because that's arguably the path of least resistance nowadays. I don't think he really ever does anything beyond echo a narrative to the extent that it fits what he wants the world to be, but that's really it. I wouldn't really call him "extreme" because he has no idea what he's talking about outside of the most basic political opinions. He's historically apathetic to things that don't benefit him directly and has the mind of a child, not an antifa revolutionary. He doesn't really involve himself in actual politics as much as he just bitches about things that are easy to bitch about as far as I've seen.

 

[Juan But Not Forgotten]

Well, at the very least this one made me laugh, like any "documentary" about a lolcow should. Also, for anyone wondering "how do KiwiFarms affect lolcows if we have "no trolling plans" policy" - just watch that part where Chris is commenting about watching documentary about him. He treated it like it was all a lie, made just to torture him, even though it was just a retelling of his dumbfuckery. This is how cows view Farms and anyone who acknowledges their flaws.

I have a question though - was Quinn really superhacked or was it just a trick to get rid of Chris? Do we have anything to prove either scenario?

 

[Chrus Chundlur]

The part where Chris loses it over Quinn's hacked account is a fact that, even by the slightest margin/miracle, Chris will never have a relationship that isn't with someone named Barb. With that slim chance, whoever is with Chris better not have the internet because that person will get harassed non stop. Plus the SOB isn't mature enough to have a relationship with anyone else.

I love that the absolute moron didn't suspect she was a troll at all despite he didn't even having her number. He freaks out when her FB account goes tits up because that's the only communication channel he had with this alleged girlfriend.

He didn't as much as videochat with her (since it's been confirmed the pictures were just lifted from some random instagram thot), but the idiot still fell line, hook and sinker.

Blaming the trolls was a dick move, though. By then, he was on good enough terms with this forum to make a Q&A, and besides, Quinn just disappearing into thin air to never be heard of again would leave a clueless and batshit desperate Chris that would probably have been way funnier.

 

[The American Hedgehog]

I have a question though - was Quinn really superhacked or was it just a trick to get rid of Chris?

Quinn was a troll. Everything trolls do is geared to get Chris to make a fool of himself. Quinn didn't intend it to be the final act in her saga - she tried to string Chris along a third time but by then one of the Idea Guys was running the show and he blocked her attempt.

 

[Juan But Not Forgotten]

Quinn was a troll. Everything trolls do is geared to get Chris to make a fool of himself. Quinn didn't intend it to be the final act in her saga - she tried to string Chris along a third time but by then one of the Idea Guys was running the show and he blocked her attempt.

Wait, so he fell for that shit again? I thought that at that point in time Chris had his first white knights so maybe someone tried to get closer to get his own piece of "fame", but that was plain and simple catfish, just like almost a decade before that? Talk about stupid games and stupid prizes.

He freaks out when her FB account goes tits up because that's the only communication channel he had with this alleged girlfriend.

I'd agree if he wasn't trolled by true and honest women who went as far as meeting him IRL. But yeah, this shit is like one of the first sagas where Chris found himself in and he still fell for that almost a decade later.

 

[Kugelsak Kastengrus 6th]

When it comes to politics, Chris is a piece of tofu. He simply absorbs and mimics whatever is directly surrounding him. Whether it's Bob or Lizzie the lezzie, he just parrots it.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

I'd really love to hear the Kiwi Farms political science department explain how Chris is an 'extreme leftist.' If Chis is an extreme leftist, then my Labrador is a reactionary since he growls at strange dogs. Both have equal capacity for political thought.

When it comes to politics, Chris is a piece of tofu. He simply absorbs and mimics whatever is directly surrounding him. Whether it's Bob or Lizzie the lezzie, he just parrots it.

Although he is a sponge, he's like your typical Antifa Troon who begs for money. He loves the LGBT and genuinely believe he's now a woman. He's hideous and probably thinks the government should start a breeding/ dating program where attractive women are forced to date low lives who live with their mothers and automatically convert to a fuck mommy replacement. Conclusion: Chris is s Leftist Lunatic

 

[Second-Hand Boat Supplies]

I don't want to keep going too much because trying to get into political discourse on a Chris-chan thread is severe autism, but it just pisses me off that people view 'politics' in this way. If people — on either side of the spectrum — continue to view their political identity as their hideous troon level, things will only ever get worse. All of the things people are using to label chris as an extreme leftist are entirely fucking irrelevant. People in power are overjoyed that this is what political discussions are like nowadays. They'll continue to make sure that future generations will never own their own home while people shout themselves hoarse about how people dying their hair green is degeneracy or something.

Sorry for being so off topic. I really don't want to come off as attacking anyone on here too harshly specifically. I just wanted to vent about how meaningful political discussion is basically dead in the US and this topic came close enough.

Back on topic: Geno really makes some great low-key comedic choices in his scripts. "A selfie with a threatening aura" in his deadpan delivery really sent me.

 

[Pappy Striderite]

But what we do know is that he's an extreme leftist.

what!?
chris is whatever you tell him he is, until somebody else tells him differently. he wants to be in a social group, nothing more complicated.

give me 1 hour of LARPing with him and i'll convince him he is the reincarnation of ayn rand.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

what!?
chris is whatever you tell him he is, until somebody else tells him differently. he wants to be in a social group, nothing more complicated.

give me 1 hour of LARPing with him and i'll convince him he is the reincarnation of ayn rand.

Chris' political views are not even that complicated to understand, it depends on who he relates to more and listens to what he says. Currently he doesn't care about politics except for the ones in toonland

 

[BigTubboWithLittleChina]

Agreed. It doesn't matter whether Lisa Simpson would be a Republican or a Democrat. She's a cartoon, and a girl, and therefore must be the best choice for President, in Chris's demented eyes.

 

[AmazingEagle]

Chris' political views are not even that complicated to understand, it depends on who he relates to more and listens to what he says. Currently he doesn't care about politics except for the ones in toonland

Republicans and Democrats can both agree that he's annoying as fuck.

 

[Jozef]

Republicans and Democrats can both agree that he's annoying as fuck.

It's the great unifier. If more people would follow Chris-Chan, they'd have something in common and wouldn't fight as much lol.

As for the documentary itself, I've stopped watching. Not because of Geno or anything, but because Chris just isn't entertaining anymore. In fact this was the part of Chris's life where I stopped following him. It's not funny or entertaining anymore, it's just a combination of sad and boring.
I'd like to see more non-Chris documentaries from Geno though, maybe he'll do some when he's done with this. His documentary about the PMRC was very interesting and I've shown it to friends.

 

[Izayoi_godtime]

Finally gave in, and browsed the comment section of the doc, it sucks, it's absolutely awful, as expected. When it catches up and the hundreds of thousands start meddling in, chris-chan will be finally a completely dead cow or a have a rebirth. The amount of neckbears, white-knights, 14 year olds and even praise and mentions to other lolcows was disgusting.

 

[Juan But Not Forgotten]

As for the documentary itself, I've stopped watching. Not because of Geno or anything, but because Chris just isn't entertaining anymore. In fact this was the part of Chris's life where I stopped following him. It's not funny or entertaining anymore, it's just a combination of sad and boring.

I am just waiting for Idea Guys, then I'll jump the ship. After that it's going to turn into "On May 12th, 2019 Christine Sonichu CPU tweeted "Mommy tells that she is a real woman" and shit. Chris doesn't suffer enough to watch that.

Finally gave in, and browsed the comment section of the doc, it sucks, it's absolutely awful, as expected. When it catches up and the hundreds of thousands start meddling in, chris-chan will be finally a completely dead cow or a have a rebirth. The amount of neckbears, white-knights, 14 year olds and even praise and mentions to other lolcows was disgusting.

Absolutely agree. From all people on planet Earth they decide to show sympathy for... this? Fucking zoomers.

 

[Bec]

Chris Chan: A Comprehensive History

Listen to Chris Chan: A Comprehensive History on Spotify. A detailed look into the life of Christian/Christine Weston Chandler, one of the most curious figures in Internet subculture, and possibly the most documented person in history. This is the for-podcast-optimized version of the YouTube...

open.spotify.com

apparently its on Spotify now too

 

[metroid_fetish]

Just started watching the doc series with the latest episode and will start working my way back to the earlier episodes this weekend. All I have to say so far is that this Christine gal is a very cute girl.