Chris' funniest one-liner

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I think this was just a notation on one of his videos back in the day, so he never said it outloud, but:
"My duck hungers for tom-tom to pound!"
 
"I am going SHOVE your ASS DOWN YOUR THROAT AND MAKE YOU EAT YOUR UNDERWEAR! NNNGHHGGGHH!"
 
Shovel Mech Pilot said:
What was this from?
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The IRC chat from 23rd July 2009, when Chris went undercover as "Bill Riley." Also notable for Chris' attempts to get the trolls to convince him to rape Rocky, although that was less funny and more disturbing.
 
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"DON'T. CALL. ANYBODY."

[(Gilligan cut)

"I can't believe they called somebody."]
 
spaps said:
"I got a little Chun-Li, within me!"
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I love this one!

Tomgirl said:
"The mindfuck that he is, I would not want to fall victim of one of his impulsive manchild rampages." -- As JenkinsJinkies, trying to make Chris sound scary.
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One of my favorite examples of Chris's stupidity!

He was probably so sure that he'd really fool everyone with that shit.

"So uh, hey Everyone, this is totally Not Christian Weston Chandler here! So uh, don't um, don't think Anything of my similar Typing Style or Most Suspicious Backstory… but I wouldn't want to be Assaulted by his Most Muscular Arms which could probably lift fifty-pound Cases of Soda fifty times each!"

Real suave, Chris.
 
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My family likes to yell out "I'm workin' on it" in Chris' tone whenever they're rushed for something.

Another favorite of mine is from Bunny Hop's "...we'regonnahavefun!"
 
"Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your BREASTS OVER AND OVER AGAIN until you get the first DOSAGE of my comeuppance!" – Chris, Kacey Phone Call.

I can't help but laugh hysterically when I hear him say this.
 
Metasync said:
"Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your BREASTS OVER AND OVER AGAIN until you get the first DOSAGE of my comeuppance!" – Chris, Kacey Phone Call.

I can't help but laugh hysterically when I hear him say this.
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Another one from that same phone call that made me laugh so hard (no pun intended)

"......you'll be loving my diiiick"

The way he said it just killed me.
 
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