Prison Letters Chris writes me from Prison (dated September 19th, 2021)

[Level 43]

Please God write him back.

A thunderbolt erupts from the clouds and a booming voice echoes across the landscape: "I'M WORKIN' ON IT!"

 

[The Last Stand]

At this point I think I'll just wait and see what the lawyer does.

I'd hate to be a lawyer to where my defense would be insect.

 

[lottalove]

BUT NULL had to FAIL HIS DESTINED TEST And Betrayed Me
-->in that logic he didn't fail, he simply fulfilled his destiny. Otherwise it wouldn't have been his destiny.

eta: And then you wouldn't be Jesus either.

 

[veri]

HOLY FUCK I SEE IT (chris on the right btw i think)

Spoiler: 900 hours in ms paint

 

[LettuceMan]

It was only a matter of time before Chris developed a messiah delusion. It's been coming for a while and I'm not sure that one's even completely from the Idea Guys.

To people saying he's trying to get an insanity plea: this bullshit won't have you deemed legally insane. All that matters for legally insane is you didn't have the capacity to know what you did was wrong at the time. At the same time I can't see this ending in any other way than Chris locked up in some kind of psyche facility.

How long until the Church of Sonichu gets established? Tax exempt of course.

 

[LolRaccoon]

The fuck did I just...

Chris is being extremely blasphemous here

 

[MuuMuu Bunnylips]

Any commentary on evil gangster communist computers or living-dead Frankenstein headsets?

 

[BradCarter]

All of her past sins and regrets, and improve her abilities directly and personally, as her Goddess. We mainly Cuddled, Soul-Bonded, and Talked. Consentful and Emotionally and Mentally Supportive and Healing, I did as I had done for and with a chosen few back in Israel over 2000 years ago in cleansing Them.

Ah so Barb got fucked by her autistic tranny son because of her past sins. That checks out.

 

[TheBest]

I'm honestly surprised he didn't go farther than this. It sounds pretty tame compared to most of his antics.

 

[StraightShooter2]

After re-reading this part, I just realized that Chris basically fucked himself in the ass and pretty much admitted to the incest charge but claims it was consensual. And I don't see why the letter isn't admissible evidence in court:

"Why and What the hell?" Emanuel (God above all other Gods and Goddesses, and one of my mentors), herself, had deemed me to Heal, Cleanse, and Clear Barbara of All of her past sins and regrets, and improve her abilities directly and personally, as her Goddess. We mainly Cuddled, Soul-Bonded, and Talked. Consentful and Emotionally and Mentally Supportive and Healing, I did as I had done for and with a chosen few back in Israel over 2000 years ago in cleansing Them. More details for the Bibles that had been Overlooked and Left Out. We Gods had eased up on the views of "Adultry"; WHY Else do you all have Pro-Gay, Pro-Lesbian, Pro-Trans, and all Today and the past Decades? Everyone Involved Were All Being Genuinely, Deeply HAPPY, CONTENT, AND SPIRITUALLY SATISFIED with Themselves and Each Other. As long as All are over the age of consent, and the activity was consentual by all aprties involved, AND GENUINELY, SPIRITUALLY HAPPY, It is good.

 

[Doppelmonger]

Bob = Joseph who raised a kid that was not his natural son.
Barb = Marie, mother of JesusChris-Chan.
Chris = Jesus, the son of God.


It makes sense now, it was always in plain sight!

 

[Ensign Faggot]

I am so fucking happy.

 

[Corpun]

Damn his handwriting is more legible than my chicken scratch.

Edit: Example from my journal for autism documentation. I can read it somehow.

 

[WonderWino]

Hmmm? Is telling your Lawyer and Third Party Outsiders that you fucked your mother in order to cleanse her sins in your new role as Jesus Christ considered “meaningfully assisting in your own defense”?

That really should be a random.txt entry. It would be hilarious to ask a lawyer that question without any context and see what kind of reaction you get

That said, I wonder how long its going to be before he starts screaming 'the power of christchan compels you to find me not guilty and free me from my bonds!'

 

[rhinoplasty]

Insane incestuous rapist with messiah complex and devoted following lands in prison and starts writing letters. If Chris had grown up Mormon or Seventh Day Adventist this would the recipe for a new offshoot cult.

 

[BigTubboWithLittleChina]

Not sure if this has been mentioned in the 39 pages thus far, but did I read that line right? Has Chris just cancelled out all of his previous curses? Is Kiwi Farms forgiven for the Quinn affair?

If so, well, that's big of him.

Otherwise...ho-leeeeeeee shit. Delusional fucker barely covers it. He's still probably not copping that insanity plea, though.

 

[Steve Jail]

Did he just imply Jesus molested the disciples?

 

[Lurk Jurk]

Chris is being extremely blasphemous here

As if that's fucking new?

 

[PyrrhicRustle]

I’m crying and I can’t accurately place the emotion behind it.

 

[StraightShooter2]

Insane incestuous rapist with messiah complex and devoted following lands in prison and starts writing letters. If Chris had grown up Mormon or Seventh Day Adventist this would the recipe for a new offshoot cult.

Chris isn't remotely competent enough to be a cult leader, and his "fans" aren't the kind of people who would drink poisoned kool-aid for him, most of them are just there to laugh at his antics or feel genuinely sorry for him.