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Following Elon Musk's poll about him potentially resigning as CEO of Twitter, TheQuartering is having a meltdown of epic proportions, spam-@'ing all of his peers in the middle of the night, begging Elon and Mr. Beast in their replies to DM or call him, and unironically likening the event to 9/11, calling it "the most important day in the history of the culture war".

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EDIT: Hambles is now challenging people to fite him irl :story:
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Lolcow Salon favourite Polissa Campbell was last seen when her husband emailed Null to complain about her 10-year yeast infection. Polissa is a serial animal abuser who currently owns 11 cats, 1 dog, and 1 snake, but has had up to 20 cats and four or five dogs, all of whom died in various gruesome neglect-related ways.

Now her brother's ex-baby-mama has graced us with a full description of the family homestead, including such beautiful gems of redneck living as:

The couches were sticky. The air was sticky. The island was caught on fire by shithead trying to burn spiders with a lighter and some flammable spray.​

All small appliances were thrown out INTO THE FUCKIN YARD AND LEFT THERE. (Shithead and I got into an argument and he took a baseball bat to the appliances and said “Better the microwave than you”).​
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Every time she or dickhead, aka Josh, would open the door the smell would hit you. The windows were cloudy as hell and there were blinds and blankets/curtains up to hinder sight into the house. But the cats would be in the window, meowing.​
 
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General round-up of news about the Tenacious Unicorn Ranch:

It's been speculated over the past year that the Tranch is broke and has been inching ever closer to collapse. They've had many of their members leave and are now down to just four core members. Paul (aka Bonnie, the former co-founder of the Tranch and the guy who still owns the property despite leaving) has been expressing his displeasure in recent months, claiming that they owe him $12k and are always late on mortgage payments. He even calls them a cult!
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As a side-note, there's a long-running "joke" in the Tranch thread about how they really are like a cult, complete with bizarre communal estrogen-injection rituals. There's also a clear divide between the high-status members who get to live in the house (the "house troons") and the low-status / temporary members who are forced to live in trailers and do all the hard labor on the ranch (the "field serfs"). One of these former field serfs recently talked about how poorly he was treated, and he gave a funny anecdote about how Kevin Gibes is so lazy & high-status that he once refused to make tea when Penny (the cult leader) asked him to, instead making one of the other troons do it. The former field serf also confirmed that the Tranch hoards estrogen and only gives it out to the troons who are favored.

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Adding weight to the theory that they're broke, the Tranch's large propane tank was repo'd under strange circumstances in August/September. Note that they live off-the-grid in rural Colorado, so their heating situation is probably dire now. They installed a replacement tank, but it's tiny compared to the old one.
New:
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The Tranch has always primarily funded itself through grifting. For example, they constantly beg on social media for people to contribute to their Patreon or their (numerous & often-scammy) GoFundMe campaigns. Their latest GoFundMe campaign, however, is particularly unusual...
[Highlights by me]
We here at the Tenacious Unicorn Ranch started our project in 2018 in order to provide Haven for queer folk in the face of rising fascism in the United States.

From inception we have been a community driven project, here to facilitate the needs of the queer community, as best we can, because of the rising violence and legislative erasure going on in the US right now.

We are now ready to expand onto two additional properties, enhancing our ability to not only help with emergency housing and by providing work but adding the ability to offer support groups and queer events that are safe and accessible to LGBTQIA folks in and around Boulder County CO

These new properties also enable us to begin farming a full 5 acres giving us another source of income but also allowing us to help folks who are in need. It also opens up the possibility of having horses which is a massive benefit in helping a very traumatized community heal.
We would not be expanding the alpaca herd during this time so being able to relegate the male herd to one property will also help with pasture restoration.
We are asking for help to cover six months of the rent at the Boulder Co location plus funds to begin the farming operation there. This will also be used to build the encloser for the alpaca, sheep, goats, ducks and chickens that will be moved to the Boulder County location.
We are able to cover all other aspects of the expansion because of some very generous folks helping us get it done.
Help us continue our project and grow even more to help the queer community.
Click to expand...

Despite being down to just four core members, they want to "expand" their operation by crowdfunding the purchase of a second property in Boulder County, Colorado (about 45 minutes north of the Tranch - note that they haven't given the exact address, because this will be important). This second property is also only 5 acres, which is way too small for farming purposes - not to mention how they want to relocate half of their alpacas and a bunch of other animals to this new place as well.
  • For reference, the Tranch is ~35 acres, and that's so inadequate that their animals have caused serious ecological damage. The land is basically a desert now...
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From a Tranch Tiktok video in October:

An edit by @Terrifying Organisms, who overlayed audio from a Tranch interview where they talk about how they're interested in "regenerative agriculture":


Anyway, Kiwis quickly pointed out how absurd the idea was. The Tranch doesn't have the manpower to run two properties, and 5 acres is pitifully small. It makes far more sense that this latest GFM (with a $45k goal btw) is one last grift before the current members abandon the Tranch. None of them actually own the Tranch property, after all! It will be Paul's mess to clean up if the Tranchers choose to flee.

Finally, the most recent news:
While the Tranchers haven't given the address of the second property, they did post some pictures here and here. Kiwi user @Jump just pointed out that this looks an awful lot like Penny's parents' property at 9105 Yellowstone Rd, Longmont, Colorado. This is indeed in Boulder County, and the property is indeed 5 acres.
  • Penny (aka Philip Logue) is the cult leader of the Tranch.

TL;DR
The current Tranch members are likely getting ready to abandon the Tranch within the next few months since they're broke and don't actually own the Tranch property. Before they bail out, they're trying to scam some more money with one last GoFundMe campaign. They claim to be "expanding" by buying another property, but the property in question appears to belong to the parents of their cult leader. They naturally haven't disclosed this...

Under their care, the Tranch has become a blasted hellscape, and it's unlikely that they'll be able to relocate their horde of literally hundreds of animals to this new place. I wouldn't put it past them to just leave a bunch of animals behind. Troons are a blight upon the earth.
 
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Since Nick Rekieta posted his unflattering bottle in his ass with his wife, the transition from a "lawyer who shits on degens" to someone who bangs seven gram rocks faster and harder than his friend Drexel arranges " gangbangs on married white women" (Drexel's words) has only been increasing in velocity rapidly.

The farms have done some digging alongside his own retardation in his videos and the following are of note:
  1. It appears he went to Hedonism II, a swingers resort in Jamaica. He may have admitted it to a degree in a video, but a poster that is fresh meat has done some detective work and I'll let their post speak for themselves.
  2. He may have gone to a GAY♂BAR underwear party and wore his wife's thong (?I don't event want to know....) in MN. There is an video clip that surfaced this week around his birthday in said club that you can hear someone saying "I'm 41" that sounds like Nick (Ongoing)
  3. He is getting shat on in his discord server and locked them all apparently (No proof posted yet, ongoing) EDIT: See this post and this one. Orbiter and "muh SF" fuel pumper Spectre06 has appeared as well.
  4. Continues to double down as hypocrite, he once said to bring back shame and made fun of degenerates, now he says anyone who doesn't like what he's doing is a prude/incel/buzzword of the week. (Ongoing)
  5. Confirmed to most of us that locals chat is just as bad as discord, except instead of tranny pedos it is BPD winemoms posting nudes. (Second source, was suspected before but now is proved and ongoing)
  6. Is getting shit (aside from his supporters) on a channel dedicated to clipping "lawtube" content.
  7. Said he is reading is thread frequently (Again, ongoing and I can't find the proof)
  8. May have connections to Ghetto Gagger's cast via Drex/Dick Masterson
  9. Defended Elijah Shafer about his cheating accusations.
Shoutout to @Balldo's Gate, @WhoDaresWhoCaresWhoKnows, @ColinQuinnsStent, @cypher3057 and @Luwinkle in particular for good detective work/ braving discord/locals degeneracy. Same can be said for nameless others who admitted to their sacrifice by subbing to his locals before this spiral. Your honor and fidelity to the farms is not forgotten :semperfidelis:

EDIT:
Thanks to @TheClappening for have no life being more devoted to the farms compared to me.
Hey Nick, what happened to your "I HATE DRAMA?"
:gunt:DRAMA STREAM ON LOCALS NOW:gunt:
Ongoing as of 16:15 12/20 GMT+8 (China time)
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