Corrupt-a-Wish

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Ian Brandon Anderson said:
Your family discovers the fanfictions and becomes irrevocably convinced that they are yours. Every family gathering is there after awkward.

I wish new all cars ever had the same safety rating as the safest car invented to date.
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All cars are based on the safest car invented. However, the safest car was still in beta and doesn't go above 40mph.

edit: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I wish that Adam Sandler wouldn't exist.
 
Bogs said:
All cars are based on the safest car invented. However, the safest car was still in beta and doesn't go above 40mph.

edit: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I wish that Adam Sandler wouldn't exist.
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Rob Schneider is now the star of several successful comedies.

I wish I could witness the campaign in which this occurred.
 
trombonista said:
Rob Schneider is now the star of several successful comedies.

I wish I could witness the campaign in which this occurred.
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You come 3 weeks early while they're rolling characters and wander off bored by a lack of antics.

I wish for extremists on either side of the political spectrum to cancel each other out and vanish from existence unless they walk everywhere holding hands.
 
APerson said:
You come 3 weeks early while they're rolling characters and wander off bored by a lack of antics.

I wish for extremists on either side of the political spectrum to cancel each other out and vanish from existence unless they walk everywhere holding hands.
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All Extremist are now scientologist.

I wish Obeme would leave the white house.
 
You have lovely new socks, but they are eaten to threads by moths. The moths then slowly tear the skin off your body.
I wish I cared more about social justice.
 
Abethedemon said:
You have lovely new socks, but they are eaten to threads by moths. The moths then slowly tear the skin off your body.
I wish I cared more about social justice.
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You become a trans-nigger trans-cat demigirl whose only character trait is being trans. You lose your job because you post on tumblr all day. You gain 80 lbs and insist on wearing panties all the time. You eventually get arrested for sexual harassment even that you fervently deny.

I wish I had a nice looking dress.
 
You get a nice looking dress but it is made of a synthetic, highly flamable material which ignites the moment you go near an open flame.
I wish for an old Arisaka Type 99 Long in like new condition.
 
Alex Krycek said:
You get a nice looking dress but it is made of a synthetic, highly flamable material which ignites the moment you go near an open flame.
I wish for an old Arisaka Type 99 Long in like new condition.
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You pay 500 dollars too many for it. This makes you unable to pay rent, so your landlord gives you a warning which includes 25 minutes of yelling.

I wish I had less anxiety.
 
You're now less anxious. Now you have so much confidence, you die crossing the street.
I wish the guys that combined Psy with Linkin Park made more albums
 
Abethedemon said:
You're now less anxious. Now you have so much confidence, you die crossing the street.
I wish the guys that combined Psy with Linkin Park made more albums
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Their albums drop in quality with the increased quantity, and the most recent one is just fifty minutes of screaming. You buy them all and lose all your money.
I wish that my computer was not able to break.
 
APerson said:
Their albums drop in quality with the increased quantity, and the most recent one is just fifty minutes of screaming. You buy them all and lose all your money.
I wish that my computer was not able to break.
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The computer fan stops functioning due to a bug and you're not able to repair it because you can't get inside.

I wish for a non-retruded maxilla.
 
Your non-retruded maxilla becomes a reality. However, you later get attacked and deformed by some random crazy with a bat. You now have a retruded maxilla after the surgery is performed.

I wish I was in a land of Wizardry.
 
c-no said:
Your non-retruded maxilla becomes a reality. However, you later get attacked and deformed by some random crazy with a bat. You now have a retruded maxilla after the surgery is performed.

I wish I was in a land of Wizardry.
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You find yourself teleported there, unfortunately it's a land of B-movie wizardry, which means nothing is terribly convincing and everyone overreacts to everything.

I wish my fridge would restock itself without my having to leave the house.
 
Your fridge restocks itself with food that you either hate or find to be very bland. Enjoy mediocre to horrible meals.

I wish people would use the pronouns I have.
 
Picklechu said:
They use them for themselves.

I wish that I could find a job that doesn't suck.
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You find a job that doesn't suck, but it's in Alaska and you don't want to move there.
I wish that I could go out in the clothes I find comfortable without people looking at me weird.
 
Your wish comes true. Sadly, you also become as fat as Fatman and a-log combined.

I wish Crystal Pepsi would come back.
 
It literally has crystals in it this time. Enjoy choking and having your throat cut at the same time.

I wish I wasn't a slob so I could actually succeed in college.
 
You do well in college, but your degree is in women's studies and you end up homeless with six figures of debt.

I wish that I could move to Alaska. :tomgirl:
 
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