Count Dankula interviews Chris

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Marvin said:
Because a surprising(?) number of people who read the cwcki are completely dumbfounded that Chris can tie his shoes in the morning without getting arrested or pepper spraying someone. Or that he can't talk to a girl without his tongue hanging out like he's a cartoon character, with dashed lines pointed at her tits.

So someone just talking with Chris about the minutia of his daily life, would break a lot of misconceptions people have about him.

The funniest Chris is natural, true-n-honest Chris.

Still funny, but substantially different from what most people expect.
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I'm just starting to watch now, but Chris never fails to remind me that whilst he's nuts, he's actually a likable nuts.
He'll run you down in his car or mace you if the chance presents itself and his stench could kill a grown man, but at the end of the day, he's not that bad or even that crazy. He's functional and pretty normal compared to most cows on this site. I think a lot of people think of him as a cartoon character rather than a person and forget the little things that he is capable of (like driving a car, feeling love towards his pets, occasionally paying his bills) - which pit him directly against the likes of Jake Alley. That guy can't even manage those things.
Chris has a reputation that precedes him and people just think it's non stop "Don't call anyone". They forget that he's actually - I hate saying this - a pretty normal individual by all accounts.
 
heathercho said:
I'm just starting to watch now, but Chris never fails to remind me that whilst he's nuts, he's actually a likable nuts.
He'll run you down in his car or mace you if the chance presents itself and his stench could kill a grown man, but at the end of the day, he's not that bad or even that crazy. He's functional and pretty normal compared to most cows on this site. I think a lot of people think of him as a cartoon character rather than a person and forget the little things that he is capable of (like driving a car, feeling love towards his pets, occasionally paying his bills) - which pit him directly against the likes of Jake Alley. That guy can't even manage those things.
Chris has a reputation that precedes him and people just think it's non stop "Don't call anyone". They forget that he's actually - I hate saying this - a pretty normal individual by all accounts.
Click to expand...
This is important to keep in mind.

Like, Chris was getting into these same insane idea guy rants about cwcville around the time of Magfest. If you asked him about it, he'd give you the same weird stories that he does now. Or he might offhandly mention his spouses in cwcville.

But outside of that, his mental functioning is pretty much normal. He's more like a little old catholic lady than a schizophrenic. Like Terry A Davis is fucking bonkers, and if you trigger him in the wrong way, he'll outright stab you. That's the face of schizophrenia. What Chris exhibits is being too autistic to know when to shut his mouth.
 
TheMockTurtle said:
This interview proved to me that Chris is not being genuine about his other dimension theory. When Dankula pressed him on real details he wasn't able to provide any, he never once described a first-hand interaction with any character, and his explanation on how he gets there was wishy-washy and changed forms throughout the interview.
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Keep in mind that Dank was talking to an exceptional person with some very work-in-progress beliefs (I think any thought with Chris is a perpetual work-in-progress anyways), Chris tripping over himself or blanking while being questioned on his weird-ass cartoony religious beliefs is very expected because Dank probably brought up some things that he never even thought about..

heathercho said:
I'm just starting to watch now, but Chris never fails to remind me that whilst he's nuts, he's actually a likable nuts.
He'll run you down in his car or mace you if the chance presents itself and his stench could kill a grown man, but at the end of the day, he's not that bad or even that crazy. He's functional and pretty normal compared to most cows on this site. I think a lot of people think of him as a cartoon character rather than a person and forget the little things that he is capable of (like driving a car, feeling love towards his pets, occasionally paying his bills) - which pit him directly against the likes of Jake Alley. That guy can't even manage those things.
Chris has a reputation that precedes him and people just think it's non stop "Don't call anyone". They forget that he's actually - I hate saying this - a pretty normal individual by all accounts.
Click to expand...
I wouldn't call Chris an outright normal person, but he's GQ's Man of the Year when compared to fucking Jake Alley. He's far more independent than anyone ever expected him to be, even if he goes about everyday life in an exceptional way.
 
neural said:
Keep in mind that Dank was talking to an exceptional person with some very work-in-progress beliefs (I think any thought with Chris is a perpetual work-in-progress anyways), Chris tripping over himself or blanking while being questioned on his weird-ass cartoony religious beliefs is very expected because Dank probably brought up some things that he never even thought about..
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Yeah what you're describing is someone lying

Its a work-in-progess because its not a real experience he has had
 
TheMockTurtle said:
Yeah what you're describing is someone lying

Its a work-in-progess because its not a real experience he has had
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lol no, I was more describing that moment when you ask a child tough questions about the tooth fairy or Santa and they start pondering the questions you gave them. If you think that anyone who stammers or hesitates is lying, then you really shouldn't consider a career in law enforcement, my dude.
 
neural said:
lol no, I was more describing that moment when you ask a child tough questions about the tooth fairy or Santa and they start pondering the questions you gave them. If you think that anyone who stammers or hesitates is lying, then you really shouldn't consider a career in law enforcement, my dude.
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Yes, because those children are also recalling a real experience they had with real entities.

I don't think you understand the conversation you're having.
 
neural said:
Keep in mind that Dank was talking to an exceptional person with some very work-in-progress beliefs (I think any thought with Chris is a perpetual work-in-progress anyways), Chris tripping over himself or blanking while being questioned on his weird-ass cartoony religious beliefs is very expected because Dank probably brought up some things that he never even thought about..

I wouldn't call Chris an outright normal person, but he's GQ's Man of the Year when compared to fucking Jake Alley. He's far more independent than anyone ever expected him to be, even if he goes about everyday life in an exceptional way.
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Yeah I mean he's not normal as a human, but compared to the subhumans like Jake, Nora, Sam or any of the ratking, he's doing ok.

Like CWCisms are innocent and cute compared to Jake's Googleshngs, not to mention that Jake is a literal nonfunctional dirty sweatpant wearing fat fuck who wears velcro coz he wont even tie a shoe lace.
Where as people's misconception of Chris is that he's at that Jake level when he's actually not, like @Marvin said.
I guess I find it interesting how an autistic vehicular menace with a proclivity for macing people over a cartoon is less of a mess and more interesting than a giant gnome living off his mother.
 
TheMockTurtle said:
Yes, because those children are also recalling a real experience they had with real entities.

I don't think you understand the conversation you're having.
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Dude.. Santa and the Tooth Fairy are real people? Are you sure that I'm the one who doesn't get the conversation? Are you even reading lol?

heathercho said:
Yeah I mean he's not normal as a human, but compared to the subhumans like Jake, Nora, Sam or any of the ratking, he's doing ok.

Like CWCisms are innocent and cute compared to Jake's Googleshngs, not to mention that Jake is a literal nonfunctional dirty sweatpant wearing fat fuck who wears velcro coz he wont even tie a shoe lace.
Where as people's misconception of Chris is that he's at that Jake level when he's actually not, like @Marvin said.
I guess I find it interesting how an autistic vehicular menace with a proclivity for macing people over a cartoon is less of a mess and more interesting than a giant gnome living off his mother.
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I really want to see Chris register as a proper member here, I really wanna see his opinions on Jake and co.
 
Marvin said:
No, Chris' daily life is way more complex than you'd think. He goes places, socializes with friends, etc. Like that tea house interview? Chris does that shit with IRL friends. We'd all love to hear about that.
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I'll take your word for it because I don't follow Chris closely nowadays. I've assumed that he's still just playing Playstation all day, detaching from reality to the point of delusion. I assume Dankula and his audience is the same way. If you're familiar with his nonsense or you know what parts have been fed to him by trolls, talk about his fantasies may seem less interesting, but anyone who isn't neck deep in this shit is going to be immediately interested in discussions about using portals to work as a diplomatic emissary between Quahog and Equestria or how Ted Bundy is the only other half-Sonichu. Get Louis Theroux on him if you want more, I guess.
 
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Marvin said:
Because a surprising(?) number of people who read the cwcki are completely dumbfounded that Chris can tie his shoes in the morning without getting arrested or pepper spraying someone. Or that he can't talk to a girl without his tongue hanging out like he's a cartoon character, with dashed lines pointed at her tits.

So someone just talking with Chris about the minutia of his daily life, would break a lot of misconceptions people have about him.

The funniest Chris is natural, true-n-honest Chris.

Still funny, but substantially different from what most people expect.
Click to expand...

So you mean to say that Chris isn't a walking disappointment, and a perfect example of society's cultural degradation and why we as a species need a social groom/trim either through selective breeding or mass culling ; or are you saying that he isn't a 2 dimensional walking punchline who consumes his own semen, defecates himself, and stress sighs while cutting open his taint?
 
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