Cryptocurrency Lolcows

AnOminous said:
Lots of altcoins with nothing whatsoever better about them, in fact, outright identical, have come into existence and blown away like dust.

Dogecoin is only a thing because of that doge. That's all that separates it from those other technically identical coins.
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One of the definitions of a currency is that its units must be easily recognizable. Now, what's easier to recognize than that goofy Shiba Inu face?

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DykesDykesChina said:
One of the definitions of a currency is that its units must be easily recognizable. Now, what's easier to recognize than that goofy Shiba Inu face?
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Name recognition is also why Bitcoin is still the most used cryptocurrency, even though arguably the stupidity and self-destructive and often outright criminal behavior of nearly all the relevant principals has rendered it possibly the worst, most broken, unsustainable currency of the lot.
 
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Solzhenitsyn said:
So I have to powerlevel a little bit here, but I think the story is worth sharing: I used to own quite a bit of Dogecoin. This was back in the super early days when everyone knew the coin was just a meme to troll Bitcoin (and at the time, Litecoin, although I don't think that altcoin exists in any real form now). It was cheap, good fun and we used to fund unusual causes like an actual Jamaican bobsled team for the Winter Olympics. Suddenly a bunch of Asian whales took notice of the coin and prices skyrocketed. Within a month the community was filled with people who just started taking the thing way too seriously. They actually believed that a fake currency with a fucking dog meme on it could challenge Bitcoin and become a legitimate form of tender.

On their heels arrived the usual flock of Internet banks and businesses looking to cash on on the idiot born every minute. Among them was Moolah, some sort of currency exchange that also offered an online wallet service. They were also looking for investors for some sort of Dogecoin ATM project. While they were shilling for this, they also seriously infiltrated the Dogecoin community, and I mean seriously. They became the unofficial official Dogecoin bank. They handled the funds for a lot of Dogecoin fundraisers and enterprises, and did some kinda weird shit like dropping 20 grand on the NASCAR fundraiser apparently "by accident". They hired several prominent figures in the Dogecoin subreddit, including a couple of moderators (possibly more, but they didn't admit to it). They were the e-celebs of Dogecoin, the cool kids, etc, etc. (I had cashed out at this point because the joke was long dead.)

Now while all this was going on, the price of Dogecoin was steadily declining, because the Asian whales had made their money and dumped all their stock onto the market, and Dogecoin has huge inflationary properties that I don't remember enough to explain. Moolah were still the e-celebs, but a lot of people started growing very suspicious of them and left, thereby proving themselves a cancer on the community because we didn't believe in the new world order, etc, etc. Moolah's ATM investors started getting upset because they were being treated with blatant disrespect that would make Brianna Wu shed a tear of pride. Then a moderator came out with evidence that Moolah was a scam and its proprietor a known con artist. Said proprietor, Alex Green, threw a tantrum of true autistic rage and stormed out, Cartman-style. Reddit admins, who were tangled up in this in ways I don't quite understand, permanently banned the moderator and began shadow-banning anyone else who shit-talked Moolah. Alex Green sidled back in to the cheers of his fan club and the matter was considered settled for several months. During this time, Moolah made a big show about how they bought another company called Mintpal, which is some other online wallet service or something.

Some time later, Dogecoin was in the absolute toilet, and, like so many other companies, Moolah declared bankruptcy. They began claiming that they never owned Mintpal at all, and people suddenly found their money they put into both websites' wallets couldn't be withdrawn. All the money from Mintpal was funneled into Green's personal accounts. The ATM investors lost everything without a single sentence of explanation. And a document was released by the creator of Dogecoin and the ex-moderator who blew the whistle on them that proved that Alex Green was actually a renowned scammer named Ryan Kennedy. After this, lots of people formerly scammed by Kennedy came forth to confirm the documents, and some of his employees, namely a dogecoin moderator, admitted to the public that yep, they were being assfucked.

Green went full tard at this, threatened to resign, decided against it when he realized he could make more money from bankruptcy, fired all his employees, and abandoned his current girlfriend in Japan without a dollar to her name. He started leaking all sorts of fun information about his employees while threatening them with lawsuits, but he was fucked as this point and everyone knew it. I don't know what happened to him, if he actually faced legal action or not. People said they would but I don't know if anything came of it. Anyway, Dogecoin is essentially dead at this point, as everyone finally realized what they should have learned from the start: memes lie, people die.
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ryan kennedy got arrested for being a serial rapist

http://siliconangle.com/blog/2016/02/08/bitcoin-scammer-ryan-kennedy-arrested-on-rape-charges/

i am not kidding

currently sentenced to 11 years dungeon in the uk
http://www.bristolpost.co.uk/bristo...ars-for-rape/story-29586393-detail/story.html
 
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AnOminous said:
Lots of altcoins with nothing whatsoever better about them, in fact, outright identical, have come into existence and blown away like dust.

Dogecoin is only a thing because of that doge. That's all that separates it from those other technically identical coins.
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I wouldn't mind doge on the $20.
 
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DykesDykesChina said:
https://store.bitcoin.com/collections/fine-art

bitcoinjesus.png

Bitcoin Jesus
$ 10,000.00
17.685342 BTC


artofbitcoin_large.png

The Art of Bitcoin
$ 10,000.00
17.685342 BTC


winkelvii2.jpeg

Winklevoss 2.0
$ 10,000.00
17.685342 BTC

What really makes me uneasy is the near-certainty that there is some autist out there who has one of these hanging above his sofa.
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Please tell me that those aren't just photographs with a Photoshop filter.
 
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smellymarine said:
Please tell me that those aren't just photographs with a Photoshop filter.
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"I've been painting all my adult like. It is what I come back to time and again, regardless of what else is going on in my life, whether business, politics, writing, even Nascar and endurance racing.

I work to create art that speaks to me, that speaks for me, that reaches out beyond me to others.

Over time I have gone from crayons and charcoal on paper, to oil and acrylic on canvas, to working with the tools of technology at my daily disposal, including MacBook Pro & iPhone, from which I create very unique, compelling, and personal works ...

... works that push the envelope, that speak of the human condition and the people who condition humanity. All from a foundation of passion. A passion both for the tools I use and the subjects I focus on.

To me, art is passion. My passion. And my work is all about the pursuit of that passion."

- Pierre Bourque

https://store.bitcoin.com/products/bitcoin-jesus
 
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smellymarine said:
Please tell me that those aren't just photographs with a Photoshop filter.
Click to expand...

DykesDykesChina said:
"I've been painting all my adult like. It is what I come back to time and again, regardless of what else is going on in my life, whether business, politics, writing, even Nascar and endurance racing.

I work to create art that speaks to me, that speaks for me, that reaches out beyond me to others.

Over time I have gone from crayons and charcoal on paper, to oil and acrylic on canvas, to working with the tools of technology at my daily disposal, including MacBook Pro & iPhone, from which I create very unique, compelling, and personal works ...

... works that push the envelope, that speak of the human condition and the people who condition humanity. All from a foundation of passion. A passion both for the tools I use and the subjects I focus on.

To me, art is passion. My passion. And my work is all about the pursuit of that passion."

- Pierre Bourque

https://store.bitcoin.com/products/bitcoin-jesus
Click to expand...

So... Yes.

I've seen better from those photo kiosks at malls that imitate art.
 
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There was quite a freakout on the Bitcoin subreddit yesterday, as one of their best exchange services, Circle, decided to sever ties with Bitcoin.
Naturally, because it can't be possible that Bitcoin simply wasn't profitable for them, Circle are either huge assholes who never "understood" Bitcoin in the first place or are being held to ransom by the Man.

Plenty of laughs to be had in this thread and this one.
 
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Solzhenitsyn said:
There was quite a freakout on the Bitcoin subreddit yesterday, as one of their best exchange services, Circle, decided to sever ties with Bitcoin.
Naturally, because it can't be possible that Bitcoin simply wasn't profitable for them, Circle are either huge assholes who never "understood" Bitcoin in the first place or are being held to ransom by the Man.

Plenty of laughs to be had in this thread and this one.
Click to expand...

Don't try to talk about the real reasons people think the developers are absolute morons there, though, because this dipshit, Michael Marquardt, is one of the very people fucking up Bitcoin, as well as one of the moderators on pretty much every Bitcoin-related forum:
https://www.reddit.com/user/theymos

It's hilarious Bitcoin arose and became so popular among the kind of ancap jerkoffs who constantly rant about how evil the Fed is, which it kind of is, but then Bitcoin itself is run by a bunch of idiots even more corrupt and outright criminal. Theymos presided over and even outright promoted and advertised for a series of Ponzi scams and basically every huge ripoff that ever occurred in Bitcoin in his role as admin of bitcointalk. Theymos presided over massively advertising the blatantly fraudulent Butterfly Labs. And on and on.
 
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Wood Glue said:
Ethereum, one of the many alt coins, has tanked rather heavily during the past few weeks. This will logically lead to our loved ones will succumbing to HIV and amputees not getting their limbs regrown. At least if Reddit is to be believed.

https://www.reddit.com/r/ethereum/comments/5gjnye/ethereum_science_and_medicine_human_progress/

http://archive.is/cpS00
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What the fuck was the point of Ethereum to begin with?
Here's a solution to a problem nobody cares about?
 
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buffaloWildWings said:
What the fuck was the point of Ethereum to begin with?
Here's a solution to a problem nobody cares about?
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Bitcoin has a programming language of sorts that is used to determine how the transactions work out. Usually it's a simple case of "input: this money here, output: account X", but it can be used to represent more complex payouts. However, it's not a Turing-complete programming language (you cannot do loops). Ethereum fixes this by making the language Turing-complete, with the limitation that each computation costs "gas", so programs will not run forever.

They basically hyped this as a way to create "smart contracts", as in computer programs that determine how and when certain transactions occur. A contract would look like "If both persons A and B have paid X amount by date D, then that money is sent to C, otherwise it's returned to A and B."

It really is a solution looking for a problem, because there's a big annoying limitation: smart contracts can't interact with real-world conditions (e.g. "Has this building been built? Did it pass the government inspection?"). So hyping them as a replacement for just about any real-world contract is kind of silly. Also, they kept harping on about how computer programs are unambiguous and how human-readable contracts are always subject to interpretation and pointless lawsuits (free hint: the real business world actually isn't full of contract-nitpicking dicks.)

And the DAO incident this summer was a perfect gem of how this pointlessness worked out. The idea behind the DAO was that this program would pool money from people and people could then vote on how the money is invested. Lots of cries along the lines of "code is law!" and "running the business through a flawless computer program means we only need to trust the cryptography, not human politicking!" and "Ethereum blockchain is immutable, human contracts are not!" were heard.
...which worked fine until someone found out that the DAO code had a massive bug in it, drained the thing of money, and people started arguing just how hard they should listen to the "code is law" and "blockchain is immutable" slogans. Ethereum developers ended up implementing a software fix to bail out the DAO investors, so apparently code is law but developers control the code, so actually developers are law, duh.
 
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Sounds like your basic problems when wide-eyed geeks ignore or don't see the various real world problems that exist outside the design studio, and when informed of them, try and invalidate them as excuses to not move forward, not legitimate concerns about something the designers obviously didn't think of.

I. E. - The people trying to develop driverless drone delivery for books/pizza not even considering the fact that no person at the wheel means a LOT of real people will now attempt to rob/shoot down the darn things for free books/pizza since a computer can't file a criminal assault complaint.
 
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