Let's Sperg Darkest Dungeon Let's Sperg: Part 3 - You Maniacs! You got Bloodborne in my Darkest Dungeon!

[Jaimas]

For those who missed the previous excursion into Autism, I highly recommend you read through the previous thread. It was wrought with equal parts win and frustration, and ended with the death of a cosmic elder abomination and a phyrric ending at best.

But Crimson Court just came out, so now we're gonna be able to check out this new thing. Glorious.

Things have been hard for The (The) Kiwi Farms Estate since the death of the cosmic horror lurking under the manor. For the most part, the group has been unable to forget what nightmares they saw there and have been plagued with so many questions: Why did Null's Ancestor try to send us Kind Regards? Why does this place continue to sink into depravity and chaos?

Why the fuck is Sable so sexy?

Sadly, this is not the only set of questions to be asked.

@Burned Man is still alive. He was fully prepared to make the sacrifice, along with @BOLDYSPICY!, but in the end, @Cosmos and @GethN7 stuck to the plan and ensued the beast was slain. He has returned a hero, a mortal champion who fought something of indescribable evil and sent it screaming back to its master in the beyond.

....But the battle did not leave him unscarred. The loss of several friends has given him more faces to haunt his dreams - more people he needs to avenge. Worse, he is coping with the fact that he found a reason to keep going in @alex_theman, and while there are a few romances apparently going on in the party (@Jaimas and @Shuu Iwamine, for instance), the bulk of the group has been overwhelmed by what they saw.

Some continue to hallucinate. @Meowthkip insists the forest is beyond saving and must be burnt to the ground. @Ravelord does his best to keep his neophytes sane, and @c-no continues his tireless vigil, preparing for when the horrors arise once more - so he can slay them once again, with help from @lolwut - who does what he does best: Murder every motherfucker that dares cross the threshold into the hamlet with hostile intent. For money.

It is then that @Randall Fragg, fresh from a hunt with @Solzhenitsyn and @A Random, brings terrible news:

Things are stirring again below the old abbey: different things. Solz has explained his doggo has been finding bizarre corpses that appear to have been drained of blood, and scouting teams sent ahead by the Rangers' Guild have yet to return. None of this matches the previous beasts we've faced so far.

Something still stirs amidst the ruined estate. With weapons in hand and a new threat emerging, the Kiwis once again take to the battlefield, and prepare to look into this new region. First, however, we need to unlock it by murdering things, and so we're sending out Lolwut and company. Next update when we get the new zone unlocked.

 

[Jaimas]

The group began to murder things in pursuit of clues. We put @lolwut in charge of that for reasons obvious:

Finally, the problem made itself known: Less due to to specific things on the team's part and more because it was determined that these fucking mosquitoes that keep plaguing the town are coming from someplace.

Unfortunately, the new region is apprentice level. For the first time, this means we need to recruit new troops and since the last 2 weeks have been nothing but classes we already have 4-5 of, I'm putting out an APB: Which Kiwis want to be in? We have openings in the roster, a new class to try, and a dire need for another Arbalest as well.

 

[Wallace]

Don't think I saw my name on that list. Put me back in, coach!

 

[Piss Clam]

I read your play through and I fired up Darkest Dungeon after not having played for several weeks. I immediate triggered the 'wolves at the door' (fate) and lost my lvl6 leper...I won, but the price, the price. First character I lost.

Thanks.

 

[AnOminous]

Anominous and Animonous2 died horribly!

 

[Sable]

Anominous and Animonous2 died horribly!

In the stories the youngest brother always wins! Give number three a chance to be eaten by stirges!

 

[Jaimas]

Don't think I saw my name on that list. Put me back in, coach!

Wallace the 2nd is still around, as is, despite claims to the contrary, AnOminous II.

Both are elite status by this point so neither can go in and face the peril just yet.

 

[lolwut]

The group began to murder things in pursuit of clues.

Kill everyone and you'll eventually off the bad guy. Now that's a plan I can get behind.

 

[Burned Man]

Kill everyone and you'll eventually off the bad guy. Now that's a plan I can get behind.

It went pretty well last time. I see no reason to change our strategy.

 

[Jaimas]

New party members have been gathered: @vertexwindi, an Arbalest, @Curt Sibling the Crusader, @Darwin Watterson the Flagellant, and @Collections Agent makes 4.

More soon.

 

[Collections Agent]

New party members have been gathered: @vertexwindi, an Arbalest, @Curt Sibling the Crusader, @Darwin Watterson the Flagellant, and @Collections Agent makes 4.

More soon.

I'm first to die, calling it

 

[Jaimas]

So the hits keep on coming with new content. We have a ton of new lines from the Narrator, as well as tons of new backgrounds, even on familiar areas.

For example, you can start a Warrens mission outside the fucking Warrens now.

Anyway, let's discuss the new class.

Meet @Darwin Watterson, our Flagellant.
Holy shit, this guy is unique, and I mean that in one of the best ways possible. This dude kicks ass for the lord.

First of all, he counts as Religious; you can throw him in a party with other Holy Rollers and he fits fucking perfectly. I, on the other hand, have another party in mind for the dude, but we'll get to that.

He's got the highest possible Death Blow resist of any character by default, and though his damage output isn't so good, he has, without exception, the best fucking bleed in the game, bar none - dealing 4 damage per round at base level and 6 at max, like the Plague Doctor's Blight. He's also unique in that he will only use the Penance Hall for stress relief in town, and he also will never go Virtuous. Instead, he has a unique Affliction, Rapturous, which causes him to hurt himself and give bonuses to the team. Yes, seriously.

He also only has four camp skills: A self-heal, a self-stress heal, a self-stress cause, and a resistance booster for himself.

The Flagellant also has a number of unique skills that make him kind of a treat to use. His Reclaim skill gives a sort of Anti-Bleed to one teammate, causing them to regain HP for a short time (though not much at first). He can also whip the back rows (less bleed damage but more area covered), use Suffer to trade allies' status effects (INCLUDING MARKS) onto him, and boost his own Stress to reduce a buddy's.

The coolest feature of his moves is that he has two - Exsanguinate and Redeem - that are both usable only when he's at 50% or less HP. Exsanguinate makes him do a massive-damage Bleed-inducing Falcon Punch to an enemy that packs the most brutal bleed in the game (9 damage at max!!) and high damage - while also giving the Flagellant back around a 3rd of his hit points! Reclaim heals one ally, again, about 1/3 of their HP - making the Flagellant capable of accurate, high-yield heals - much more reliable than say, @Techpriest or @c-no's russian roulette wheel healing, but also not able to completely top up an injured character like those two.

That much power with the 50% health moves comes with a price, though: Each one causes massive debuffs: Cutting damage by 30%, Dodge rate by 10%, and Speed by four. While you can use these moves repeatedly at low HP, the debuffs stack - so after 2 in a row, you're at -60%, -20%, and -8. That's the price you pay, however: you either put up with his crippled damage output/speed/dodge rate or you keep some goddamned herbs handy.

All in all, Darwin seems like a solid addition and we're going to see how he does in his new team, as said team needs at least an aventure or two under their belt before they're ready to take on their next challenge.

@Curt Sibling, Darwin, @Collections Agent, and @vertexwindi prepare to enter the cove. This team combo has potential, and we'll need to see how they stack up before the big mission ahead.

Darwin does just fine. In fact, better than; Fish are normally bleed-resistant but that doesn't stop our favorite whip-swinging maniac.

He's always smiling in combat, too. He has nothing, however, on Collections Agent's banter:

You also get to see how nice the new buff from the Cartographer's Camp is. More on that later.

Halfway through and the group's standing their ground. Not bad, really.

He ain't @lolwut or @Wallace, but Collections quickly proves himself a mighty axe-wielding maniac. He has excellent Synergy with Vertex, who can mark targets, and with Curt, whose stun ability can open them up for Finishers. Fun!

Darwin showing off his new heal. Brings all the regens. If this were even remotely stronger this would probably be highly useful.

Compared to previous Crusaders (@Jaimas and @AnOminous), Sibling's raw offense. No healing needed; he'll stab things until they fall down. Optionally he'll stun them, and when needed he can dart from the back row like AnOminous, sort of making him a blend between the two.

Vertex hasn't hit her stride yet, but is still a solid long-ranged damage-dealer and healer when situation merits. Give her time.

A bit later and we've found some items called "The Blood." This, apparently, is a useful consumable that is mostly useful in the area we're going a bit later. The team wraps up the mission soonafter, and this team has shown some solid potential. I'm impressed!

First foray into the new region to come next time.

 

[Collections Agent]

He's always smiling in combat, too. He has nothing, however, on Collections Agent's banter:

Im fucking done

 

[Jaimas]

The team is sent to the courtyard, after @KidKitty claims that if those fucking mosquitos accost the whores in town again he will kill every motherfucker in the east end. @RJ MacReady insists he isn't bluffing, and so our team of new hires get moving. We send in @Curt Sibling, @Darwin Watterson, @Collections Agent, and @vertexwindi, while newcomers @Hodor and @Ginger Piglet train under @Techpriest and @lolwut.

The courtyard is a strange place, accounting for the galleries and hedge mazes outside the front of the Manor. Perhaps we'll learn how this shit is connected to the Ancestor. The Narrator insists that this place was always the place where sexual indiscretion and depravity ran rampant, since, after all, he was anything if not the Caligula in Null's family.

You got Bloodborne in my Darkest Dungeon!

In all seriousness, this place is bad news. Blood eveywhere and a constant mid-level "Bloodlight" level that boosts stress damage, and makes everything bleed more often. Good news for Curt's team; bad news for Curt's team. The entire level layout is an old manor garden, mired in a festering swamp.

The objective: Find and burn down the hives that the Mosquitos are using to attack the village.

The enemies here are a mix of infested nobles, who have so engorged themselves on Blood and fed on their own dross to the point where they've partly mutated. We also have vampire bugs - giant mosquitoes - eager for flesh and blood. While fragile, the fuckers hit hard and constantly heal themselves vampirically.

Thankfully, by this point Vertex has hit her stride and the team has little problem ripping down the enemies and reaching the hive.

Curt's shitposts are as lethal as Jaimas and AnOminous!

The first hive is burned down. So far, things are going well.

On we fight through bugs and death.

Followed by more bugs and more death.

Unfortunately we hit a small problem when an enemy Mosquito decides that it isn't going to get hit today, and proceeds to damage Vertex, Curt, and Collections Agent all with its main attack, and inflicting the Crimson Curse. Fuck you, RNG.

The infection cannot be treated right now and matches no known disease, so the Sanitarium can't help. Instead, we can only treat the symptoms, giving doses of The Blood (that new item) to them when their symptoms flare up; you cannot resist the effect; if not treated somehow, the infected will die. The only hope for a cure is to find where this cancer came from and get a sample so our team can be treated, but that will need to wait. Right now, we're burning down the hives.

Unfortunately, a boss is present to remind us all that this game hates us. No, the game did not specify that there was a boss in this area.

This is the Crocodilian - a crocodile that has grown disgusting and twisted by feasting on the infected, becoming a battlefield terror with a taste for infected blood. It stands in our way, so right now, we've got only one recourse: Putting this fucker down for good. And with good reason, too - this monster is tough, hits wicked hard, and has two turns a round! It's seriously way harder than any apprentice boss has any right to be.

Thankfully he's vulnerable to Stunning, which Collections immediately does by pitching Flashbangs at the fucker. This cuts his turns down to one a round, while gradually, the team wears the menace down with bug bites. Downside: This asshole can self-heal, induce massive bleeds, and debuff like crazy. Shit.

His strongest attack is done after submerging; it is called Apex Predator and does massive damage and bleed. Potentially to several people. Thankfully Collections Agent is going to be stopped by something silly like death.

Especially not with friends at this side.

His other attacks are just as brutal, with bleed and damage to spare.

But the Kiwis are fueled by Autism, in addition to Bloodlust, and soon the Crocodilian is no more.

Finally, the team burns down the last hive.

Back to town, the team is immediately stopped by @Shuu Iwamine, who locks the team in the entrance until she can get a few needles in and find out what the group is working with disease-wise. At the moment, Shuu can't cure it, so right now, quarantine is all we can do. Nobody is allowed to use stress healing facilities or the sanitarium while one of Curt's team is using it, though this has not stopped @Burned Man, who no longer has any fucks to give, nor @alex_theman, who follows her dear Leper everywhere.

We now have contagion indicators. Trouble is brewing. And things have gotten worse:

Destroying the hives has made mosquitoes spawn in the Weald, Warrens, and Cove. God damn it.

 

[RJ MacReady]

Been busy all week and didn't see this thread go up. USMC intel says the danger level is Mountain Dew™ Code Red (with blood) but that won't stop us.

 

[Burned Man]

Liveable levels of degeneracy...its good to know the Farms are back to normal.

 

[Collections Agent]

But the Kiwis are fueled by Autism, in addition to Bloodlust

This needs to be the new site description

 

[Sable]

Three curses?

They're gonna be hammered up by the hammer man.

 

[Jaimas]

We actually get a proper cutscene here and an explanation courtesy of the Ancestor.

Back in the day, the Ancestor used to throw wildly opulent parties that tended to culminate with orgies, drugs, and periodic outbursts of sadism. It was typical rich-people risque fun, the sort that led to @Sable's dark sense of humor and @Ol' Slag's unfortunate carelessness with a firearm.

One day, however, a newcomer - a noble from far away - came to the event.

She was intoxicatingly beautiful, as well as incredibly charming - but the Ancestor, in a rare moment of clarity could tell that this woman was nothing less than a predator, and moreover, one that risked fucking up his nights of lewd fun. He was not about to let that shit fly.

He invited her to dance, and the two spent some time together as the Ancestor waited for the chance to strike.

He foolishly brought her out back to finish her off - only to discover that she was no mortal woman and she had every ability to break him the fuck in half.

The entity that now rules this region was powerful enough to kick the ass of the Ancestor, Kiwis.

This is what we are dealing with right now.

 

[Sable]

I'm gonna need a bigger pickaxe.