Dating stories thread

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Melktert

Melktert

Save the afrikaaners
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Aug 8, 2020
IDC if this sounds autistic but i want to hear your guy's dumb, interesting, spergy, funny, or sad dating stories. anything that has happened to you while you dated someone or were on a date, post in this thread. keep it interesting of course.

i'll start

Went on a date with this girl from my college, 5'2" blond baptist chick, she was nice at first, we took a nature walk, then she started talking about this guy that she liked as if i was her gay confidant. she ranted for the entire walk (3 miles) about how this guy was so funny and sweet and how she loved him.. i said nothing until i got to my car. she asked to hang out again so i sperged out and just got in my car, reversed extremely fast, and sped down the road back home. she called me and texted me quite a bit after, but i didn't respond.

should've run for the trees when she mentioned how much she liked "jacob"...

the next one is less weird and more "sweet"

my current girlfriend is very goofy and also colorblind. last week, she wanted to make bead bracelets for some reason, so we do that, but she kind of stutters and says "h-hey Melktert... can you help me pick out which of these is yellow?" as she points at a neon orange and a yellow one (can't tell them apart). i found that really cute.
 
oh how I wish I could share some of my more autistic adventures

but I think I've PLed too much
 
So I met this adorable guy online, and we set up a date at a coffee shop. I got there a bit early, so I wasn’t surprised to not see him there.
Then about 10 minutes after we agreed to meet, he texted me.
Turns out, he wore these skinny jeans to accentuate his ‘features’, and they fucking ripped.
So, I got him his coffee and we just hung out at his car and laughed about it.
It didn’t go as planned, but I snatched victory from the jaws of defeat.
 
CivilianOfTheFandomWars said:
So I met this adorable guy online, and we set up a date at a coffee shop. I got there a bit early, so I wasn’t surprised to not see him there.
Then about 10 minutes after we agreed to meet, he texted me.
Turns out, he wore these skinny jeans to accentuate his ‘features’, and they fucking ripped.
So, I got him his coffee and we just hung out at his car and laughed about it.
It didn’t go as planned, but I snatched victory from the jaws of defeat.
Click to expand...
so he had a big PP or a big ass?
Hylics said:
I fucked a girl in an apple orchard, then came in cider.
Click to expand...
Thanks Gaffigan
 
I took a first date to see Fifty shades of grey in the cinema. Best date ever. Funny enough to make it awkward but sexy enough so that sexy thoughts go into our heads and fantasy starts. Also the old ladies yelling excitedly was great.
 
I went on a date once with a girl who thought the friend that set us up was trying to set up a date with her.
This girl had a crush on said friend and he was trying to get rid of her by setting her up with me, lol.
Oh, did I mention that my friend already had a girlfriend?
The girl he set me up with was a fucking idiot.
 
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