Skitzocow Dave Johnson - "The Civil War and the moon are hoaxes!"

[Jewelsmakerguy]

Well, you can't explain that.
View attachment 24983

I got one:

"The government has powerful machines that can suck water in and out at certain intervals."

Still though, this guy sounds absolutely hilarious. Even for a conspirator.

 

[Ravenor]

Can we get Space Jesus an this guy in the same room together?

 

[shinimasu]

I don't know what this guy is trying to win but he's definitely going all or nothing to get it.

 

[Furina]

Whenever I hear conspiracies like "The Moon isn't real!" I always have to ask, for what purpose? Why would the government project an image of a large globe into the sky? What is the end goal of the conspirators? And how does he explain references to and images of the moon in ancient art? Unless he's suggesting that they were added later on. But doesn't explain why no one noticed that there was suddenly a big light in the sky.

Anyway, it reminded me of this:

 

[ZehnBoat]

This guy is also claiming that the Nepal Earthquake is a hoax. He might as well believe that everyone but are government agents acting as 7 billion people.

EDIT:

this guy really is absolute gold

let's see, he wrote truth as "Truth" like it was a proper noun.
yep, he's a nutcase.
don't need any other test.

Whenever I hear conspiracies like "The Moon isn't real!" I always have to ask, for what purpose? Why would the government project an image of a large globe into the sky? What is the end goal of the conspirators? And how does he explain references to and images of the moon in ancient art? Unless he's suggesting that they were added later on. But doesn't explain why no one noticed that there was suddenly a big light in the sky.

the whole point of conspiracy is to make the person who believes it feel special.
that's it.
there's no discovering of facts, there's no whistleblowing.
people just so want to be special and unique, there has to be something they know that no one else does.
there just has to be something that makes them special.
whether it's fake moon landing, freemasons, or frankenstein radio ear-phone slavery. these people are special because they know the Truth (tm)

 

[melty]

Strangely enough this isn't the first time I've heard someone claim the moon isn't real. Like the normal moon landing hoax theory isn't good enough for them, no, they have to go a step further.
I'd like to see someone claim that there are actually multiple moons in the sky and the government is hiding them, now that would be creative...

 

[Johnny Bravo]

Whenever I hear conspiracies like "The Moon isn't real!" I always have to ask, for what purpose? Why would the government project an image of a large globe into the sky? What is the end goal of the conspirators? And how does he explain references to and images of the moon in ancient art? Unless he's suggesting that they were added later on. But doesn't explain why no one noticed that there was suddenly a big light in the sky.

Anyway, it reminded me of this:

As far as I can tell he believes the moon used to be real and was only destroyed recently. However, if the moon suddenly vanished, we'd all be dead.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Is this the same nutjob that thinks the moon is a hologram?

I remember commenting on that video a while back asking about how it was that the bible mentions a moon and how we see it in ancient artwork. His response was simple, those things were added later and wouldn't elaborate as to why this would happen.

That's all I ask. Give me a reasonable explanation as to why such a thing happens and I'll happily be on my way. I won't believe you, but at least I'll be satisfied.

 

[autisticdragonkin]

I got one:

"The government has powerful machines that can suck water in and out at certain intervals."

Still though, this guy sounds absolutely hilarious. Even for a conspirator.

we have a series of pipes underground which pump water from one side of the earth to the other side of earth in order to create the illusion that the moon exists

 

[Ravenor]

we have a series of pipes underground which pump water from one side of the earth to the other side of earth in order to create the illusion that the moon exists

I was just going to ask that, I mean seriously if the moon is fake how does he explain Tides for god's sake.

 

[RequiredName]

He sounds like those Termina guys.

 

[Azazel]

Love how he uses his joint as a pointer in the moon video. Very professional.

Okay, so I wasn't just imaging it during the dress video when I thought I heard a lighter flick, a bong rip (or the sound of something being burned), and then coughing a few seconds later.

What we have here is a man who has smoked himself retarded.

I was just going to ask that, I mean seriously if the moon is fake how does he explain Tides for god's sake.

Well apparently the tides happen regardless of the Moon, according to him, because in the Bible the tides were created before God created the Moon. He's a bit of a religious wacko, he wants people to look up at the moon projection and accept Christ or something, and then be given instructions to build a temple.

 

[XYZpdq]

Tides are when the water falls in the hollow earth and falls back out.

 

[voiceguy]

He's Right! THE CIVIL WAR WASN'T REAL! 600,000 deaths? Don't make me laugh! If 600,000 people died then where are all the bodies?

Was that over the top enough or do I need to work on it still?

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

He's Right! THE CIVIL WAR WASN'T REAL! 600,000 deaths? Don't make me laugh! If 600,000 people died then where are all the bodies?

Yeah! And if you compare pictures of Jefferson Davis and Abraham Lincoln then they're obviously the same person! Never mind the reputed 5" difference in height it's not like anybody now ever saw Abraham Lincoln. He could have easily have been standing on a orange crate during his entire Presidental term. And the hat he wore was so big that it just made him look real tall...

Was that over the top enough or do I need to work on it still?

If anything you didn't go far enough.

 

[Enjoy your spaghetti]

But does he acknowledge Kentucky's existence?

 

[voiceguy]

If anything you didn't go far enough.

Okay, how's this?

I'm not saying that there was never a moon. Of course there used to be a moon. People in the past confirmed it was made of cheese. Well, everyone knows cheese doesn't last forever, not even in the sub-zero coldness of space. (By the way, space can't really be that cold or the Earth would be a giant ball of ice. Why am I the only one who understands all of this?) Over thousands of years, small bits of the cheese moon would break of and melt in the Earth's atmosphere -- the so-called meteorite showers and "shooting stars". Near the end of the 1940's scientists realized the moon was getting so small that something would have to be done quickly for all the lovers who wanted to make out in the moonlight. Around 1953, a technology of hologram projection was created that was so far ahead of its time that scientists kept it a secret for over 30 years. Suddenly there was a bright shining moon in the sky again. What do you think caused the Baby Boom? The fact that it coincided with the creation of the holographic moon proves that my entire story is indisputable fact!

Better?

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Okay, how's this?

I'm not saying that there was never a moon. Of course there used to be a moon. People in the past confirmed it was made of cheese. Well, everyone knows cheese doesn't last forever, not even in the sub-zero coldness of space. (By the way, space can't really be that cold or the Earth would be a giant ball of ice. Why am I the only one who understands all of this?) Over thousands of years, small bits of the cheese moon would break of and melt in the Earth's atmosphere -- the so-called meteorite showers and "shooting stars". Near the end of the 1940's scientists realized the moon was getting so small that something would have to be done quickly for all the lovers who wanted to make out in the moonlight. Around 1953, a technology of hologram projection was created that was so far ahead of its time that scientists kept it a secret for over 30 years. Suddenly there was a bright shining moon in the sky again. What do you think caused the Baby Boom? The fact that it coincided with the creation of the holographic moon proves that my entire story is indisputable fact!

Better?

Much. You made it crazy, didn't back up your facts and insisted that this was an indisputable fact. I would have added stuff about the Illuminati, the phrase, "something they don't want you to know", conspiracy and maybe a mangled bible verse as well for that real, downhome, tinfoil hat flavor.

 

[Bassomatic]

A guilty pleasure of mine is things like this, I think I enjoy the mind set of how people cook these things up or where they get the ideas. Then you get the ones like this were I just assume a lot of paint thinner is the culprit.

 

[Frank Rizzo]

If 600,000 people died then where are all the bodies?

You joke, but IIRC, that was one of his main points that he always clings to when he talks about the war being a hoax.