DC Comics Multimedia General - A crisis of infinite fuck ups

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It really is not stated often enough just how bad the dialogue in James Gunn's Superman is. Dialogue is often what young writers are interested in doing well in, can be easily checked by reading it aloud, which Gunn did multiple times in the editing process. It's not fair to compare Gunn to Hemingway, but Hills like White Elephants is a general guide to how dialogue is supposed to be written. When Gunn does the opposite of that, it makes characters sound like they're rationalizing their own behaviors, so Supes sounds like he doesn't believe it himself when he says he's a human being.
He never writes good dialogue. Just projects his terminal insecurity onto characters who spew endless unfunny babble in hopes the audience will laugh at his pathetic vapidness before they cringe at it.
 
It would be pretty funny to a-log a superhero, could you imagine da sektur culture in the DC universe?
Isn't this just what Reverse Flash does everyday.

"Remember that hashtag you saw that called you #SpeedyShit? That was me Barry. I created that hashtag and using my super speed opened up a million Twitter accounts just to post under a hashtag that specifically irritated you. This caused you sperg out and lose focus, giving me enough time to kill Iris."
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There's another version of Lex Luthor that pulls off manipulating Superman, the one from Superman and Lois.

In one episode, Lex sends Otis to kill Lana's daughter. After Lana stops Otis, Clark storms over to Luthor's hideout in a fit of rage over all of Luthor's recent schemes desjgned to get a rise out of him. Unlike the movie, Clark is not being filmed. It was all a trick by Luthor to lure him into a street filled with red sun lamps so he can fight him. Even though Clark wins the fight (this is one of the few adaptations that remembers he can fight without powers), Luthor gets the moral victory by getting Clark to stoop to his level
I don't care how hard you guys cyberbully me, Superman & Lois version of Superman is the best live action one. If he were in Superman 2, he'd have beaten the shit out of that asshole trucker even without his powers, but wouldn't have completely fucked him up out of spite like the Reeves version, just humbled him.

Just make Superman actually competent instead of some dumbfuck who was born lucky, jfc.
 
I don't care how hard you guys cyberbully me, Superman & Lois version of Superman is the best live action one. If he were in Superman 2, he'd have beaten the shit out of that asshole trucker even without his powers, but wouldn't have completely fucked him up out of spite like the Reeves version, just humbled him.

Just make Superman actually competent instead of some dumbfuck who was born lucky, jfc.
Isn’t that the Superman who let the bull of the worst Lois live on his property, with their half-breed?

That’s also the one where Eradicator (my favorite niche comic character) was Lara-El’s rape baby. I don’t know why Lara is the target of jew cuck shit but I really don’t like it, Superman vs Lobo did the same thing, with her dressing slutty and fucking Lobo, then talking about his dick as her and Jor-El die.

They’re literally the best parents ever and it’s telling that the modern crap keeps “subverting” the purity of that love, to save your child, knowing you’re dead, to trust him into the kindness of strangers and for your faith to be rewarded when he lands in the arms of a couple who couldn’t have kids of their own and raised him right. No, “get a harem.”
Isn't this just what Reverse Flash does everyday.

"Remember that hashtag you saw that called you #SpeedyShit? That was me Barry. I created that hashtag and using my super speed opened up a million Twitter accounts just to post under a hashtag that specifically irritated you. This caused you sperg out and lose focus, giving me enough time to kill Iris."
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Livewire too, in a modern version, she’d just be Hasan.
 
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Superman should be someone I aspire to be.
If I can take online criticism better than him, he loses his purpose.
Everyone in the movie is always whining. You have superman crying about twitter, meanwhile his main villain whining about being jealous of superman while being cucked by jimmy olsen. Both the hero and antagonist are so completely neutered, whats the point.

Lex should internally seethe with jealousy at superman not say it out loud with tears in his eyes, it should be subtext/unspoken motivation. And Lex should be closer to nailing Lois and cucking superman than he should be to being cucked. It shouldn't actually happen but you should believe it could happen.
 
They’re literally the best parents ever and it’s telling that the modern crap keeps “subverting” the purity of that love, to save your child, knowing you’re dead, to trust him into the kindness of strangers and for your faith to be rewarded when he lands in the arms of a couple who couldn’t have kids of their own and raised him right. No, “get a harem.”
That makes me wonder: has there ever been a storyline where the Kents and the El's get to meet somehow? I know some continuities have Jor-El's hologram/memory hanging out in the fortress of solitude for a time. Only one I remember was Injustice.
 
Isn't this just what Reverse Flash does everyday.

"Remember that hashtag you saw that called you #SpeedyShit? That was me Barry. I created that hashtag and using my super speed opened up a million Twitter accounts just to post under a hashtag that specifically irritated you. This caused you sperg out and lose focus, giving me enough time to kill Iris."
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Now I'm just wondering who's more petty, Lex Luthor or Eobard Thawne.

I mean, I know Thawne canonically jerked Barry off at super-speed so it seemed like he had nutted at just a woman's touch, but Luthor once ran an entire fake presidential campaign just to piss off Superman.
 
Now I'm just wondering who's more petty, Lex Luthor or Eobard Thawne.

I mean, I know Thawne canonically jerked Barry off at super-speed so it seemed like he had nutted at just a woman's touch, but Luthor once ran an entire fake presidential campaign just to piss off Superman.
lex wasn't willing to be gay
 
That makes me wonder: has there ever been a storyline where the Kents and the El's get to meet somehow? I know some continuities have Jor-El's hologram/memory hanging out in the fortress of solitude for a time. Only one I remember was Injustice.
Interestingly enough, there's an issue of Superman/Batman where Jor-El apparently brain-napped Thomas Wayne of all people to get a vibe on this Earth place and see if it would be safe for little Kal.

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According to some news site:

DC Studios has just registered a 'Salvation Run' trademark for a film. Also includes comic books, printed materials, luggage, athletic bags, clocks, watches, clothing, toys and entertainment services

Doing a "Salvation Run" movie - one of the most underwhelming DC tie-in series, limited series, and just a poorly executed comic in general - before Gunn and company have built up any kinds of rogues' gallery is just stupid. Trying to make a huge event movie right away is what killed the DCEU right off the bat.
 
Everyone in the movie is always whining. You have superman crying about twitter, meanwhile his main villain whining about being jealous of superman while being cucked by jimmy olsen. Both the hero and antagonist are so completely neutered, whats the point.

Lex should internally seethe with jealousy at superman not say it out loud with tears in his eyes, it should be subtext/unspoken motivation. And Lex should be closer to nailing Lois and cucking superman than he should be to being cucked. It shouldn't actually happen but you should believe it could happen.

Thinking about it, there's not a single admirable character that you would want to be like in the movie. Lex is weak. Superman is petty. Olsen is a jerk. Guy Gardner is kind of meh but okay-ish. Terrific is generally condescending and anti-social. For the girls, Lois maybe? Lex's girlfriend is pathetic, Hawkgirl is self-involved and far, far from the comics. Supergirl is sozzled. Even the fucking dog is badly behaved. It's a movie with not one truly admirable person.

As people were talking about strong Superman interpretations, this ones a bit niche but the cross-over mini-run with the Question. Superman has his range of more exotic powers (like being able to see the structure of blood cells) but character-wise, he's direct, powerful and very confident. He figures out who The Question is pretty quickly and he leaves no doubts about what he will permit in Metropolis and what he wont. It's also the big balls version of Lois that was willing to jump from a skyscraper to get the first interview with Superman. Which honestly probably shows more than any other version of her why he actually is impressed by her - she's a genuine risk taker and determined as Hell.


Doing a "Salvation Run" movie - one of the most underwhelming DC tie-in series, limited series, and just a poorly executed comic in general - before Gunn and company have built up any kinds of rogues' gallery is just stupid. Trying to make a huge event movie right away is what killed the DCEU right off the bat.
What's Salvation Run?
 
earth deports baddies
baddies have a big crossover adventure

so really great for a cinematic universe with tons of fleshed out villains who totally stick around past one movie
So a guardians of the galaxy... Gunn can do a great gotg series w/ peacemaker and sending others and they all work on getting back while peacemaker kills them off one by one. Would make great TV. Then do a movie...

Hopefully Gunn sticks around with the WB sale. A lot of potential since he's adapting comics correctly. New medium, new stories using the source only for inspiration. Marvel just keeps retelling shit with minor/major changes cause they can't figure shit out.
 
Doing a "Salvation Run" movie - one of the most underwhelming DC tie-in series, limited series, and just a poorly executed comic in general - before Gunn and company have built up any kinds of rogues' gallery is just stupid. Trying to make a huge event movie right away is what killed the DCEU right off the bat.
I'll bet you anything it's because the original idea for Salvation Run was an Elseworlds (IIRC) pitch by George R.R. Martin that was shelved and later turned into SR. That's why the seemingly random interest. A GRRM credit, even a basic story credit, would attract Gunn more than an actual story.
 
What's Salvation Run?
A bunch of villains get stranded on a planet and need to survive. It is really only notable for Lex and Joker kicking the shit out of one-another.

Doing a "Salvation Run" movie - one of the most underwhelming DC tie-in series, limited series, and just a poorly executed comic in general - before Gunn and company have built up any kinds of rogues' gallery is just stupid. Trying to make a huge event movie right away is what killed the DCEU right off the bat.
They are desperate and Gunn's whole schtick is transforming D-listers into whatever the hell he wants, so another film filled with Suicide Squad fodder is of course what he chooses.

Hawkgirl is self-involved and far, far from the comics.
They kept trying to sell her as the DCAU version rather than comics, but that one is significantly better in every regard. I like the actress, but like every DC project, it is a good actor saddled with a terribly made version of said character.
 
earth deports baddies
baddies have a big crossover adventure

so really great for a cinematic universe with tons of fleshed out villains who totally stick around past one movie
Wasn't that done in Marvel's Civil War too? Kinda funny how against all odds, Star girl Live Action seems good so far.
I wonder if someone will ever adapt the grimderp and worst of DC like the Final Crisis, Black Lantern drama, or the Batgod Dark Crisis mega Mary Sue overload. These would destroy the normies' perception of these heroes... But I am not sure DC will live for this long.
 
Wasn't that done in Marvel's Civil War too? Kinda funny how against all odds, Star girl Live Action seems good so far.
I wonder if someone will ever adapt the grimderp and worst of DC like the Final Crisis, Black Lantern drama, or the Batgod Dark Crisis mega Mary Sue overload. These would destroy the normies' perception of these heroes... But I am not sure DC will live for this long.
I'll admit I barely even glance at the rifftrax for most all of this shit, but isn't part of the zazz of "DC but they're DARK" is you need roughly eighty years straight of DC being seen as the goody-two shoes company with Boy Scout, Bat-Scout, and Girl Scout, then Fast Scout and the Space Boy Scouts
 
According to some news site:



Doing a "Salvation Run" movie - one of the most underwhelming DC tie-in series, limited series, and just a poorly executed comic in general - before Gunn and company have built up any kinds of rogues' gallery is just stupid. Trying to make a huge event movie right away is what killed the DCEU right off the bat.
But does the suicide squad kill the Justice league in it?
 
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