Defendant: Ethan Oliver Ralph - Ethan Ralph's Documented Legal Troubles & Other Court Docs

if he were to get locked up for a month, that would likely cause Pantsu real problems with paying the rent.
Sounds like a Pantsu problem — just like scraping together a few coins for stale bread and water was her problem when Ralph bounced and left her no money to feed herself or her child. Considering Meigh’s admitted breastfeeding fetish, maybe they just lived on horse milk until Ralph got home.

Either way, he will not see this as his problem. If she wants a roof over her head she can go out and work for it. Ralph’s wife will be the only American woman in history who emigrated to Mexico to pick lettuce in the fields with her baby on her back.
 
Sounds like a Pantsu problem — just like scraping together a few coins for stale bread and water was her problem when Ralph bounced and left her no money to feed herself or her child. Considering Meigh’s admitted breastfeeding fetish, maybe they just lived on horse milk until Ralph got home.

Either way, he will not see this as his problem. If she wants a roof over her head she can go out and work for it. Ralph’s wife will be the only American woman in history who emigrated to Mexico to pick lettuce in the fields with her baby on her back.
I do not think you can trust a horse to pick lettuce.
 
Doesn't Ralph have court today? I assume it's just Zoom since it's about his allegations about the new dad for Xander that he submitted, but I'd imagine the trial for the violations is an in-person thing.

yes, he did. yes, it was. and yes, as expected, he lost again.

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he is required to appear in person for the trial next week. expect a lot of squealing as he abandons his wife and child for ten days, and displays an incredible degree of delusion about the outcome of the trial ...

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yes, he did. yes, it was. and yes, as expected, he lost again.
Thanks, I didn't expect anything big to come today. I like that he spun it as a W because "it's out there" now and he's hoping to tell Xander aaaaall about it when he's a teenager as though Ralph is going to make it :story:
 
yes, he did. yes, it was. and yes, as expected, he lost again.

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Is he implying he's going to tell Xander that his step daddy fingered his mother at Disneyland? Unless that "one individual" is someone else it's unreal how he really expects Xander to laugh at his mother when he's grown up but he's probably just going to end up kicking Ralph's ass if he's anything like his father, we all know how much Ralph hollers when someone talks shit about his mom. Xannie delusions off the charts as per usual.
 
I'll be absolutely flabbergasted if his organs don't give up somewhere along that gauntlet and/or he fully remembers all of his engagements.

The amount he loops on stream due to short term memory loss as of late is incredible.
During his last trip to Cali he lost his iPhone lol and that was a much shorter trip.
 
Ew, imagine having Ethan Ralph: Convicted Sex Offender staying in your actual house. Drinking out of your glasses, shitting all over the toilet bowl, staring at your girlfriend, making his weird guttural murmuring pig breath noises, spilling tomato sauce all over the place, diddling himself in the guest bed… hurK
 
Vickers just streamed about Ralph's court hearing most recent court hearing. It was about Ralph's Request for Order which he filed on March 15.
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He went over Faith's response to Ralph's filing, which @Haru Okumura screenshotted in the Matthew Vickers thread, and which I'll include here:
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Here are some highlights from the document:
The Request for Order filed by Mr. Ralph, aside from being a barely coherent diatribe with no relevant evidence provided to support his ridiculous claims, was specifically filed to cause harassment of my fiancé, Iziah Valle, who is no part of this order. Additionally, the Request for Order is a deliberately vindictive filing that Mr. Ralph attempted to leverage to manipulate me into dismissing upcoming legal proceedings against him.
In one breath, Mr. Ralph claims that he completely believes that Mr. Valle is a pedophile. In the next breath, Mr. Ralph admits that he is willing to dismiss his "complaint" about Mr. Valle in exchange for action that would be favorable to Mr. Ralph himself....
Mr. Ralph's entire filing combined with his own statements, both publicly and privately to me, leaves only two options:
1) Mr. Ralph has willingly committed perjury by laying out facts that he knows are untrue and cannot support with legitimate evidence.
2) Mr. Ralph believes what he filed is true and is willing to let someone that he believes is a dangerous pedophile be around his child so long as the outcome is favorable to Mr. Ralph himself.
I'm no lawyer, but it looks like Faith wiped the floor with Ethan "Courtroom Operator" Ralph.

Vickers also recounted how the hearing went. Here's some highlights:
  • It was a packed docket, and Ralph's case wasn't heard till towards the end. Ralph thinks that Faith didn't show up, so he turns on his camera (blue hair and all!) and raises his hand using the Zoom emoji ✋. No one notices, so he starts raising his physical hand. It goes on for like half-an-hour and he gets tired and has to switch hooves a bunch of times. No one notices, and Ralph starts getting visibly angry. At one point he gets so angry that he rips off his headphones and throws them on the ground. Eventually he says in the court's groupchat, "I need to request a continuance." Finally the clerk notices, and Ralph says, "Yer honah, I missed the part at the beginning where you asked who needs a continuance... oh wait! she's here." Mid-way through his sentence, he notices Faith is in the hearing and shuts up.
  • When speaking, Ralph constantly brings up the fact that he's an Internet talk show host. "Yer honah, am I too loud? Am I coming through alright? My studio—'cause I'm an Internet talk show host–it's not really made for court, it's set up for my Internet talk show."
  • Amanda shows up to testify, but Ralph didn't submit a witness list so she can't. Ralph responds to this saying, "Well yer honah I'm not a lawyer, I'm an Internet talk show host, so we'll just do whatever you think is best."
  • The judge basically agrees with what Faith says and dismisses Ralph's request.
  • At the end, the judge says, "We'll all see each other on Monday [for the contempt trial]." Ralph replies to the judge, saying, "Yes you will." But he said it with such a threatening tone that the judge had to pause to process what was happening. I can only assume that Ralph was seething from the L he had to take.
 
fatlock is already rehearsing his next argument ...

"nah, it's nawt trooo, yer awner! i did nawt violate tha court's ordas on multiple oh-ccasions! an' ta be perfeckly hawnest with yew, nothin' ah've eva said violates tha orda, 'cause tha orda is unconstitutional. do yew unnerstan' me?! isa prior restraint on mah firs' amenmen righs. as amadda' fact, both of 'em are!"

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At the end, the judge says, "We'll all see each other on Monday [for the contempt trial]." Ralph replies to the judge, saying, "Yes you will." But he said it with such a threatening tone that the judge had to pause to process what was happening.
The second I read this I did that involuntary head shake you do when you see some unbelievable bullshit. I thought Ralph knew to be like a good whipped little boy in front of the judge (as much as he's capable of doing so) but maybe the xannies are finally eating that part of his memory.

Monday is going to be fun.
 
I love the way he treats court like a doctor's appointment.

You manage to get your foot in the door for the 1 reason you actually specified and then at the earliest opportunity you start reeling off a bunch of other shit and hope they'll take notice because you really can't be fucked with the revolving door song and dance but that's just how it works.
 
The second I read this I did that involuntary head shake you do when you see some unbelievable bullshit. I thought Ralph knew to be like a good whipped little boy in front of the judge (as much as he's capable of doing so) but maybe the xannies are finally eating that part of his memory.

Monday is going to be fun.
The legal bullshit is the most satisfying part of the Ralphasaga to me. He’s his own worst enemy and can’t hide it on legal filings or Bog (sic) League Yer Honnah. I hope he keeps on kicking squealing Gucci little piggy while the courtroom L’s stack up as long as possible, till bottle mountain collapses the floor of muh internet studio with Mantsu sitting there grinning like a worthless PEDO APE.
 
I love the way he treats court like a doctor's appointment.

You manage to get your foot in the door for the 1 reason you actually specified and then at the earliest opportunity you start reeling off a bunch of other shit and hope they'll take notice because you really can't be fucked with the revolving door song and dance but that's just how it works.
Idk what kind of doctor you’re seeing, man
 
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