Ethan Ralph, Fugitive from Justice

[Dr Naomi Hunter]

Now that Ralph can return to the United States to see his kids he better cancel that scuba trip with the señorita he had planned.

He won't do that. He has already paid for the trip and paid for the lady of the night señorita.

 

[GamerGateSurvivor]

Now that Ralph can return to the United States to see his kids he better cancel that scuba trip with the señorita he had planned.

Ralph in a wetsuit would look like a seal with Cushing Syndrome and the sharks would try to eat him.

 

[Dixieland Buckaroo]

Ralph bitchmade, taking his L's and trotting his way back home to his tin shack with his tail between his trotters. Sad. Pathetic!

Ralph somehow managed to stay kinda on the straight and narrow after the revenge porn thing (well for a year, reckless driving in Florida excluded). Will be interesting if he can pull that feat off again for a year, even in Mexico.

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

Ralph in a wetsuit would look like a seal with Cushing Syndrome and the sharks would try to eat him.

they'd spit him back out once they got a taste of his rotten skin

 

[Useful_Mistake]

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

That's right fag farmers! All he had to pay was $589 and spend several nights in an airport and lose his passport but he got an EPIC picture with a cokehead deadbeat parent! And guess what? The fine is TAX FREE!

 

[Pelican Bones]

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Ethan Ralph (basically Matlock if you wanna know the truth about it): Skillfully and masterfully negotiates the intricacies of this plum plea deal.

Nick Rekieta: Probably poisoning his kid with cocaine right now. Probably will talk himself into the death penalty.

Ngl if my only possible options for legal counsel were these two, I'd have to go with the Ralphamale, bish.

 

[Useful_Mistake]

Ethan Ralph (basically Matlock if you wanna know the truth about it): Skillfully and masterfully negotiates the intricacies of this plum plea deal.

Nick Rekieta: Probably poisoning his kid with cocaine right now. Probably will talk himself into the death penalty.

Ngl if my only possible options for legal counsel were these two, I'd have to go with the Ralphamale, bish.

When even pilled out Ralph is smarter than you, then you know something has gone horribly wrong. Too bad that will never occur to Nick.

 

[WelperHelper99]

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The Gunt gets away with a fine just shy of 600 smacks. Total. Ralphamale. Victory. He's popping extra xannies tonight.

 

[Useful_Mistake]

He's popping extra xannies tonight.

He should save such a reward for when the Judge accepts his plea.

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

A devastating blow for the Ralphamale and he took it willingly.

Very female behaviour.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

With this we have, once again, entered into an era where Ralph cannot break the law or he goes right to jail. Now he has less opportunity to break US law while he's in a Mexican tin shack, but it's still there. Good shit.

 

[Looseleaf Paper]

Don't worry Xander, Papa is coming soon! Maybe he will visit Rosie out of new found joy as well!

 

[30+GameOvers]

He went over it on stream today. He got an offer from the court today. The deal is:

He pleads GUILTY to misdemeanor contempt of court.
He has to pay a $500something fine.
90 days jail time, suspended sentence.
And 1 year non-supervised probation.

The outcome of this will be Ralph will hide out in his 3rd world tin shack for a year until the probation is up. He brought up Alice again. There is no statue of limitations on rape in cali. And if crackhead Nick/Miltion sent him anything about Aaron's emails that could be a massive threat to his probation too.
It sort of seems like a setup to me. Ralph said he doesn't need to have a lawyer read it and will sign it tonight.

What a little bitch, lmfao
I hope this is just a trap and they're gonna hit him with something harsher once he's actually there

 

[porkWellington]

Where the fuck is the Ralph that was big-dogging the Vickers back in 2021/22. This hollow shell of a man can't even cut a promo. Chief Tonka of the steel-horse tribe was less bitch-made.

 

[Dixieland Buckaroo]

The Gunt gets away with a fine just shy of 600 smacks. Total. Ralphamale. Victory. He's popping extra xannies tonight.

If only he had the $600...

 

[WelperHelper99]

He should save such a reward for when the Judge accepts his plea.

We both know he doesn't have enough self control for that

If only he had the $600...

I'm sure he has enough coke bottles to recycle....

 

[East_Clintwood]

But how can this be? A certain smug Minnesota (non-practicing admittedly) lawyer assured me that's totally not how plea deals work up there.

 

[AncientPhosphur]

A shame. 90 days in jail would have Ralph good. I mean other than not streaming and not being able to find hookers to thumb his life would be exactly the same

 

[Lian Xing]

Terrible deal unless it is expunged after one year.