Inactive Ethan Ralph's Websites (TheRalphRetort.com and Killstream.live)

[TwinPeaksEnjoyer]

Man that article/diary was disappointing and funny at the same time.

 

[The Big Dream]

God, this was far worse than Fear. At least Fear had an element of suspense and a cohesive idea. This was just a rambling series of attempts to call Gator and Jim faggots. And the support material was pathetic. "Gator repeated something I said. Gator mentioned xanax." If he's going down the path of becoming a WWE villain, he need to work on his heel act.

 

[Berb]

What a fat whiny faggot

Spends half the article crying about Meigh being terrified by the pampers prank, but only someone completely fucking braindead would buy it.

"My pregnant gf is so terrified of being alone in the house and of potential abducters that I take impromptu vacations to own the alogs"

 

[Jack Awful]

"my past drug usage"
Lol

At least he named Jim this time. Good job, Ralph!

But you know who was upset? My fiancée, May. She didn’t lose her mind in fear. But she didn’t know who it was at first and it was a frightening situation. Why, you ask? Someone tried to kidnap her out of home in September 2020. The bastard is going to be sentenced for this next week. This is public record. But the way you hear people certain scumbags talk about this, it’s no big deal to come to my house and scare my 7-months pregnant fiancée who was almost kidnapped from her home last year.

Yea, if you think like that, you can just kill yourself. Even 30 seconds of fear is 30 seconds too much. Plus, all the people you see talking shit would literally piss their pants if someone showed up to their house. But I’m supposed to be cool with that?

Your writing is atrocious, though.
You literally only used but when you started a sentence, basic Elementary School English class lesson #1 is to never do that. Too many sentence fragments, missing words, you'll never be an actual writer at this rate.

 

[MediocreMilt]

Dear Diary,

I paid my obese man-servant less than minimum wage while regularly talking down to him for years and am surprised that he finally betrayed me.

-Rad Roberts

 

[Cucktry Roads]

"my past drug usage"
Lol

I'm glad that I wasn't the only one who rolled his eyes at that.

Anyways, I'm so happy to Ralph sperging out and burning his most stable bridge because of "xanaxberries". Also, if someone showed up to my door to give me diapers for the upcoming baby, I'd thank them.

 

[Gangster Talk]

I think the Portuguese painkillers are still affecting him, this article is especially poorly written. This paragraph in particular is almost incoherent rambling. What the hell does "got in his feelings" mean?

Anyway, after I caught the beatdown here in Lisbon, I messaged him and tried to just forget that. Let’s put it behind us, etc. This was my good friend! I thought, you know, let me let this be a lesson! Life is more important! We did put it behind us, briefly, although he still didn’t want to come back on the show. Which, to be honest with you, I was more than fine with. Then, he went on Twitter and got in his feelings after I wrote my last post. He said he would wish me the best of luck in my future endeavors. This is a line I’ve used (it comes from Vince McMahon) and he did it to fuck with me, without question. I wrote him on Discord and said there would be no further need for us to talk and he gave me the Discord for my show that I had him “running” (in reality he did very little after the setup.

 

[MediocreMilt]

What the hell does "got in his feelings" mean?

That made me stumble when I was reading too. It sounds like he means "made him upset" at first, which is incoherent given the lack of subject/object agreement.

I think he was trying to say "revealed his feelings" and did so clumsily. Maybe a rough mixed metaphor involving "put in his two cents"? All the analysis I'm putting into this. No matter what he meant, Ralph is still a big retard who never learned to write despite claiming it as a passion/career.

 

[Schlomo Silverscreenblatt]

Guys, I have a feeling that Ethan Oliver Ralph simply is not that good at writing as he likes to think he is.

 

[Desktop User2]

That made me stumble when I was reading too. It sounds like he means "made him upset" at first, which is incoherent given the lack of subject/object agreement.

I think he was trying to say "revealed his feelings" and did so clumsily. Maybe a rough mixed metaphor involving "put in his two cents"? All the analysis I'm putting into this. No matter what he meant, Ralph is still a big retard who never learned to write despite claiming it as a passion/career.

"In his feelings" is ebonics for upset. Commonly used by basketball players.

 

[Bonanza Jellybean]

That made me stumble when I was reading too. It sounds like he means "made him upset" at first, which is incoherent given the lack of subject/object agreement.

I think he was trying to say "revealed his feelings" and did so clumsily. Maybe a rough mixed metaphor involving "put in his two cents"? All the analysis I'm putting into this. No matter what he meant, Ralph is still a big retard who never learned to write despite claiming it as a passion/career.

It's slang that I've only heard from nogs and teenage girls. Your first assumption is basically right. He menat that Gator got upset on twitter.

 

[AltisticRight]

I will update the OP later with Ralph's 2 "new" hits.

Is there a word more pathetic than pathetic to describe those writings?

 

[MediocreMilt]

I will update the OP later with Ralph's 2 "new" hits.

Is there a word more pathetic than pathetic to describe those writings?

Dare I say... "womanly"... "not a good look"...

EDIT: wait, maybe it was "that's a bad look" can't remember all of his wiggerisms

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

The Ralphamale admits his "news site" is a blog.

Isn't that what the alogs have been saying for years?

All these writers have hundreds of editors ensuring they know how to use a comma.

Like Ralph there are fucking school children with a better grasp of writing than you.

 

[Keranu]

So Ralph admits he doesn't bother proof reading his own work. They are like three minute reads, you don't need hired staff to tidy up a Live Journal.

 

[Ralph Barnhardt]

Ethan said he was going to write about the sentencing of Pantsu's spooky kidnapper on Monday. He's already a day late on that article full of win. Our boy Ralph could really use a win right about now.

 

[Puck]

Ralph's got the vocabulary of a eleven year old that just discovered swear words

 

[John Andrews Stan]

All these writers have hundreds of editors ensuring they know how to use a comma.

Did he even read Catcher in the Rye? Knowing where to put commas doesn’t make someone a great writer, it makes them a fifth grade honor student. His writing needs a lot more than “cleaning up” grammatically. It needs a Silkwood shower from conception to execution. Then it needs an execution of the author (in Minecraft).

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

Did he even read Catcher in the Rye? Knowing where to put commas doesn’t make someone a great writer, it makes them a fifth grade honor student. His writing needs a lot more than “cleaning up” grammatically. It needs a Silkwood shower from conception to execution. Then it needs an execution of the author (in Minecraft).

I could forgive the poor writing style to some degree if the content had any substance.

Does he talk about ideas, current events, his hobbies, other works of media or art?

Does he discuss and critique literature?

No, his sole uses of his blog site in the last two years has been to attack "snakes" and try and play off his myriad of personal failings, all the while stroking off his Memphis Micro by waxing lyrically attempting to come off as smart.

But luv writing, I, don,t, write enough, Gator is a incel virgin loser who I paid, that, piece, of, shit, good for nothing, I could, just, holler, over, you all day, anyway, I probably drink, too, much, but that',s just me,

 

[John Andrews Stan]

No, his sole uses of his blog site in the last two years has been to attack "snakes" and try and play off his myriad of personal failings, all the while stroking off his Memphis Micro by waxing lyrically attempting to come off as smart.

That’s why I love it. I’m reading it thinking, “This is so childish and he thinks it’s a ‘media outlet’ lmao.” The entertainment value is pretty high. I wouldn’t change a thing!