Grand Jury speculation thread

[Pointless Sperg]

If convicted he will just serve a couple more months before beeing let out

It depends on if he's just normal retarded, or so retarded that he thwarts his attorney's best efforts and gets himself years in prison by refusing to budge on his entitlement complex.

 

[My Name is Mud]

If convicted he will just serve a couple more months before beeing let out

Yup, whatever happens, he is not going away for life lmao. Be it a few months or a few years, he will be out again with or without parole.
If convicted, it is not the end of Christory, just a hiatus.

 

[AnOminous]

Sorry, I guess that was insensitive.

You should have put a trigger warning on it for the sensitive flowers on here.

I have never had to try to get kicked off a jury, I would actually like it, but just answering honestly usually gets me thrown off immediately.

 

[King Kiwi]

View attachment 3555607

I wonder how much taxpayer money goes into hiring the crackerjack team of psychologists, doctors and scientists to figure out what's truly wrong with Chris.

 

[My Name is Mud]

I have never had to try to get kicked off a jury, I would actually like it, but just answering honestly usually gets me thrown off immediately.

Court: Is there anything that would interfere with your ability to be fair, unbiased and impartial in your Jury duties?
You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER

 

[metroid_fetish]

I wonder how much taxpayer money goes into hiring the crackerjack team of psychologists, doctors and scientists to figure out what's truly wrong with Chris.

He has a sega genesis complex.

 

[Hepativore]

Yup, whatever happens, he is not going away for life lmao. Be it a few months or a few years, he will be out again with or without parole.
If convicted, it is not the end of Christory, just a hiatus.

There is a very high chance that he would shortly get arrested for something else, such as being a public nuisance, indecent exposure, etc.

 

[AnOminous]

Court: Is there anything that would interfere with your ability to be fair, unbiased and impartial in your Jury duties?
You: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER

Literally just "I have a degree in law" gets you kicked off. Even if you want to be on for a bit of CLE.

I know a couple exceptions but generally that's a strike for cause.

Also people who don't get why some people would not want to be on a jury and lose all their income and possibly go broke and get fired (despite laws that say your boss cannot do that it does happen) are absolutely autistic and don't understand ordinary people, note this is an actual thing for most lawyers, who are not ordinary people.

 

[oramge cat]

He would just say i want to act in my own defence to save the universe and read my books, he has written work of millions of people laughing at him for being insane this entire website was built on the idea of he is mad... i am sorry but if Chris is not mad then who is, you have to take into account that Chris has been driven to this and he could take no more.

chris is mad and does need help and has needed help for a very long time the milking is over, now you have a mental patient.

if i was Chris defence it would sound like this "i have no idea what is real or isn't anymore"

READ. THE FAQ.

It was written by an actual lawyer who did actual research and who is a regular contributor to the Chris-Chan subforum. Seriously, an expert with a career who usually gets paid to research legal matters did thousands of dollars of work for free for just to amuse us, go check it out.

 

[A-№1]

If Bella were straight, she has far, far better options than Chris.

For now…

Also that's not saying much. Who doesn't have better options than Chris?

It depends on if he's just normal retarded, or so retarded that he thwarts his attorney's best efforts and gets himself years in prison by refusing to budge on his entitlement complex.

Well if the past year is anything to go by…

Literally just "I have a degree in law" gets you kicked off.

Having a degree in anything is often sufficient.

 

[Aciddab]

Literally just "I have a degree in law" gets you kicked off. Even if you want to be on for a bit of CLE.

wow thats depressing

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

Even then he wore barbs underwear and had a stiffy while doing so.

I am going to be fair to Chris here and say that given the sate of his duck and his higher placement (if you look at him biologically it's slightly higher up than average) and a garment not designed to accommodate a bulge it looks like he has a stiffy but he was most likely flacid or at least not erect through the act of wearing his mothers underwear.

The charges are incest. It is unlikely that rape is in the table. Though they may be implying chris had a caregiver duty, its important to note that, that still doesn't make it rape. I am well aware that kiwi desperately wants this to be an elderly abuse rape case, however as ive said from the start, barb likely merely consented no matter how disgusting anyone finds that.

Until a jury is sworn in he can have anything added to him as a charge but the more they add the more absurd the less likely he is to be found guilty, I think on the 8th he's going to get slapped with Fellony Incest as a minimum, and quite possibly the lower form of Rape as well, how that came about it up for debate but that's my working theiory for the next few days.

"I go by Christopher now. All of that fake Sonichu shit is in the past. I'm really into Harley Davidsons and UFC fights these days."

Chris never goes back, he always goes forward and identity's he rejects he kinda views as another person, one who's dead - his Birth name was Christopher, he has refaird to his younger self as a Ghosts and as other varying forms of a dead entity to him at any rate, he uses those past identitys and names as a way of delineating various parts of his life, I was Christopher then I am Christian now, and I am becoming Christean, etc, etc, he will likely just drop some of the prefixes an try and change his anme again mostly because he thinks that absolves him of past mistakes and misjudgements etc.

It depends on if he's just normal retarded, or so retarded that he thwarts his attorney's best efforts and gets himself years in prison by refusing to budge on his entitlement complex.

Chris is used to getting his own way, even if he's not happy about it and without Bob and Barb to reign in his my way or the high way attitude he will likely dig his heels in for what he feels he deserves, until something sinks in that he may be wrong, and that has to be something big and a hard fact he can really understand and not have any plasticity in his brain to think he's smart.

 

[My Name is Mud]

Chris is used to getting his own way, even if he's not happy about it and without Bob and Barb to reign in his my way or the high way attitude he will likely dig his heels in for what he feels he deserves, until something sinks in that he may be wrong, and that has to be something big and a hard fact he can really understand and not have any plasticity in his brain to think he's smart.

This is very true. I honestly believe the only thing that could stop Chris' insane antics would be Bob coming back from the dead.

 

[Hot HOT HOTTT]

Literally just "I have a degree in law" gets you kicked off. Even if you want to be on for a bit of CLE.

I know a couple exceptions but generally that's a strike for cause.

Also people who don't get why some people would not want to be on a jury and lose all their income and possibly go broke and get fired (despite laws that say your boss cannot do that it does happen) are absolutely autistic and don't understand ordinary people, note this is an actual thing for most lawyers, who are not ordinary people.

Replying to add that if you have any criticism of the legal system (mine was along the lines of "we incarcerate too many people for petty bullshit in for-profit prisons where slavery is allowed to continue" or similar) you will similarly be removed from consideration. Heaven forbid that a juror costs the prison system another indentured license plate presser.

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

This is very true. I honestly believe the only thing that could stop Chris' insane antics would be Bob coming back from the dead.

Honestly it just needs to be a Male Authority figure he trusts, and also enables him to a degree.

Bob was the more interested parent but he was also more likely to say "No" or "Knock it off" to younger Chris in a normal father son relationship that's something you learn from BUT Chris had a permant easy option of running of to Barb who countermanded Bob's efforts with rewards for minor steps forward and less harsh reprecutions for backsliding.

Chris needs a non familiar guardian with a genuine authority over Chris, and not like you would understand it like a legal guardian - he needs that and a personal one to even function near normal someone who can chew him out and cut off his little luxuries for a while not so he will develop a understanding of right from wrong but so he will fear losing X if he does Y, getting Chris to comply with normal society is like training a Dog it requires Rewards and Risks and enforcement his understanding isn't required just his compliance.

 

[Clint's Burden]

Until a jury is sworn in he can have anything added to him as a charge but the more they add the more absurd the less likely he is to be found guilty, I think on the 8th he's going to get slapped with Fellony Incest as a minimum, and quite possibly the lower form of Rape as well, how that came about it up for debate but that's my working theiory for the next few days.

If you can prove that Barb was not competent enough mentally to consent, the rape/sexual assault charge is likely. It seems obvious to us but that may not be obvious to a court or a jury, when sworn in.

In any case, we'll see what the prosecutor wants to do.

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

In any case, we'll see what the prosecutor wants to do.

Yea I am hating the speculation at this point, mostly because it's all up in the air and we are working with less than nothing.

 

[King Kiwi]

First you're all blowing up at Chris, now you're all blowing up at each other, let Chris blow himself up.

At least we have a date set that's not too far away.

 

[Pointless Sperg]

Literally just "I have a degree in law" gets you kicked off. Even if you want to be on for a bit of CLE.

I know a couple exceptions but generally that's a strike for cause.

One of the funniest things I've seen in a courtroom was an attorney who made it all the way through jury selection, did not get removed, and the trial was starting. Every officer of the court knew who she was, but neither side struck her.

Then right when things were about to proceed, she started coughing comically loudly and said -- with the biggest shit-eating grin on her face -- that she thought she was getting sick, so the judge told her to go home, and replaced her with an alternate.

It's not the only time I've seen an attorney get removed from a jury, but it was by far the most theatrical.

 

[Altera]

Until a jury is sworn in he can have anything added to him as a charge but the more they add the more absurd the less likely he is to be found guilty, I think on the 8th he's going to get slapped with Fellony Incest as a minimum, and quite possibly the lower form of Rape as well, how that came about it up for debate but that's my working theiory for the next few days.

In a normal expedient case I'd agree with you. But remember they have had him in lockup for a year now. They arnt trying to build a case against him or figuring things out. They have known what they are charging him with for months. While its still possible rape will be added, it's not likely.